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Top Headlines

Obsolete Man Skills You Should Ditch
The author left one out: "Banging my girlfriend."
[Hat Tip: Patrick] [CBD]

Definitely not-safe-for-work video from Professor Broscience, who is trying to get deliberately demonetized with his most profane video yet
I shouldn't even say what it's about. It's on the general topic of mish.

Trump gives AG Barr authority to declassify documents related to 2016 campaign surveillance. Things will really start getting interesting now. [Mis. Hum.]

Does the very short (and squat, and squalid) Jerry Nadler use a booster seat in Committee to make himself look taller? I don't know -- shouldn't there be more distance between the chair's pad and the armrests?

Esketamine nasal spray approved for treatment of otherwise treatment-resistant depression

Weekend Forecast: Sumo followed by a chance of whisky Our Commander-in-Chief is headed for Tokyo and may attend the final day (senshuraku) of the May Sumo Tournament with Prime Minister Abe. Live (blog) coverage of that final day will start this Saturday (5/25) night at the link above. See if Pres. Trump does, in fact, take a seat at ringside and make unfavorable comparisons between the large athletic men dueling in the ring and Rep. Nadler! Should be fun. Any of the real AoS bloggers can feel free to appropriate this for their various weekend posts. [Fritzworth]

lolbeans: Conservative group stages dramatic/romantic reading of Strzok/Page transcripts, in a stage show called "FBI Lovebirds," read by Dean Cain and Kristy Swanson
I'm appalled that these casting choices were so cis-biased -- unless they've made the Stunning and Brave decision to have Cain read Page's lines and Swanson read Strzok's. I'm #Woke. Twitter, unsuspend me.

Holy Man of the Tall Trees James Comey, who was once a communist by the way, finds himself in three potentially prosecutable disputes in sworn testimony with Loretta Lynch, John Brennan, and Andrew McCabe
As a commenter here cynically (but correctly) speculated, "I bet James Comey will be the only person who has a memo-to-self which purports to be a contemporaneous and accurate record of events, though." He might also have done some proactive leaking, too!

Mississippi state lawmaker arrested for punching his wife in the face because she undressed too slowly for sex
Alas, yes, he's a Republican. I'm sure that'll make the headlines of the media reports. And yet the word "Democrat" eludes them when leftwing politicians do terrible things.

I knew baseball had been getting high-tech but I had no idea...
For example, pitchers are hiring companies to custom design pitches for them.
"In 2017, Bauer saw just 2.8 inches of horizontal movement on his slider ... this season, he’s up to 11.1 inches"
(smirk)
[ArthurK]

Cannes poster features decapitated Trump
Maybe it's time to start flooding the zone with similarly violent imagery about all the left's favorite politicians, and see how they react. Dangerous, escalating provocation can be a two-way street -- if you want it to be!

Babylon Bee: Demanding to know why He allowed President Trump to get elected, Democrats subpoena God
This joke actually gets at the psychological reality of the situation. "Howl! Howl! Howl!"

Dave Reaboi: The Two Faces of Qatar

The Fiercely Heterosexual Cory Booker: Based on my extensive experience, I have concluded that white trans "women" have it easier than trans "women" of color
He's really investigated this scientific dilemma and done a lot of "experimenting."

Analysis: Newly released transcript reveals another Michael Cohen falsehood

Activist posing as "journalist" at Harvard newspaper -- though, let's face it, that's what "journalists" are now, aren't they -- seeks the next dopamine rush after having forced out a lawyer for having defended Harvey Weinstein, now demanding the Harvard Lampoon stop telling edgy jokes and become a Safe Space for jokes that aren't funny
She's essentially building a resume to join CNN's Deplatforming Team

Don Trump Junior Rips Biden as a CHINESE SPY
Well not really; that's the sort of thing Hillary, Jimmy the Communist, John the Communist, and James Clapper would say. But he does question Biden's son Hunter taking loads of Chinese money.

Chicago high school buys into the "Okay sign means white supremacy" hoax, spends tons of money to reprint yearbook after Secret KKK Sign detected

Project Veritas wins defamation case; judge issues directed verdict in favor of the defendant (James O'Keefe), calls the lawsuit "the thinnest of thin reeds"
Here's the transcript of the hearing about the directed verdict (which is a motion asking the judge to enter a judgment himself and skip the jury, which requires a showing that no rational jury could find otherwise). Project Veritas' press statement says the complainant "struggled" to convince the judge that his suit wasn't a total piece of shit.

In a perfect world he would have received the sentence that a traitor deserves. John Walker Lindh, who is currently behind bars in Terre Haute, Indiana, is set to be discharged May 23, several years before he would complete the prescribed 20-year prison sentence he received for joining and supporting the Taliban. The former Islamist fighter and enemy combatant, named “Detainee 001 in the war on terror,” was arrested in 2001, just months after the Sept. 11 attacks and the start of the war in Afghanistan, along with a group of Taliban fighters who were captured by U.S. forces. [Mis. Hum.]

Recent Comments

The Groundhog deBlasio murdered: "Well played deblasio. Can't you recognise a fuckin ..."

hogmartin invites you to the Summer MIMoMe (link: nick): "[i]"Business casual" means pants, right? Only if t ..."

Berserker-Dragonheads Division: "Appears to be the last news item on Nadler was fro ..."

Infidel: "Appears to be the last news item on Nadler was fro ..."

Cicero (@cicero): " "Business casual" means pants, right? Only if th ..."

dirac_angestun_gesept_rat_eez - "the list is long."[/i][/u][/s][/b]: "gonna stick, then ? ..."

raimondo: "Nancy pelosi is praying AOC doesn't kick her out o ..."

Tornado Moron preparing for job interview: "I apparently have some misunderstanding of the "ca ..."

Mr. Peebles: "[i]Appears to be the last news item on Nadler was ..."

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The (Almost) Complete Paul Anka Integrity Kick

Primary Document: The Audio
Paul Anka Haiku Contest Announcement
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Top Top Tens

Democratic Forays into Erotica
New Shows On Gore's DNC/MTV Network
Nicknames for Potatoes, By People Who Really Hate Potatoes
Star Wars Euphemisms for Self-Abuse
Signs You're at an Iraqi "Wedding Party"
Signs Your Clown Has Gone Bad
Signs That You, Geroge Michael, Should Probably Just Give It Up

Signs of Hip-Hop Influence on John Kerry
NYT Headlines Spinning Bush's Jobs Boom
Things People Are More Likely to Say Than "Did You Hear What Al Franken Said Yesterday?"
Signs that Paul Krugman Has Lost His Frickin' Mind
All-Time Best NBA Players, According to Senator Robert Byrd
Other Bad Things About the Jews, According to the Koran
Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore
Examples of Bob Kerrey's Insufferable Racial Jackassery
Signs Andy Rooney Is Going Senile
Other Judgments Dick Clarke Made About Condi Rice Based on Her Appearance
Collective Names for Groups of People
John Kerry's Other Vietnam Super-Pets
Cool Things About the XM8 Assault Rifle
Media-Approved Facts About the Democrat Spy
Changes to Make Christianity More "Inclusive"
Secret John Kerry Senatorial Accomplishments
John Edwards Campaign Excuses
John Kerry Pick-Up Lines
Changes Liberal Senator George Michell Will Make at Disney
Torments in Dog-Hell

Greatest Hitjobs

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon
A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates
Margaret Cho: Just Not Funny
More Margaret Cho Abuse
Margaret Cho: Still Not Funny
Iraqi Prisoner Claims He Was Raped... By Woman
Wonkette Announces "Morning Zoo" Format
John Kerry's "Plan" Causes Surrender of Moqtada al-Sadr's Militia
World Muslim Leaders Apologize for Nick Berg's Beheading
Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree
Milestone: Oliver Willis Posts 400th "Fake News Article" Referencing Britney Spears
Liberal Economists Rue a "New Decade of Greed"
Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility
Intelligence Officials Eye Blogs for Tips
They Done Found Us Out, Cletus: Intrepid Internet Detective Figures Out Our Master Plan
Shock: Josh Marshall Almost Mentions Sarin Discovery in Iraq
Leather-Clad Biker Freaks Terrorize Australian Town
When Clinton Was President, Torture Was Cool
What Wonkette Means When She Explains What Tina Brown Means
Wonkette's Stand-Up Act
Wankette HQ Gay-Rumors Du Jour
Here's What's Bugging Me: Goose and Slider
My Own Micah Wright Style Confession of Dishonesty
Outraged "Conservatives" React to the FMA
An On-Line Impression of Dennis Miller Having Sex with a Kodiak Bear
The Story the Rightwing Media Refuses to Report!
Our Lunch with David "Glengarry Glen Ross" Mamet
The House of Love: Paul Krugman
A Michael Moore Mystery (TM)
The Dowd-O-Matic!
Liberal Consistency and Other Myths
Kepler's Laws of Liberal Media Bias
John Kerry-- The Splunge! Candidate
"Divisive" Politics & "Attacks on Patriotism" (very long)
The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)