Forward! On to the Christmas shopping.

The turkey thing is spent, over, kaput. By tomorrow it'll be leftovers and garbage bags. In another week it'll be scary science experiments in Tupperware shoved to the back of the fridge.

Christmas gifts are about frivolity -- stuff you don't really need. If you really truly needed something, then you'd have already obtained it previously, because you like...needed it.

If you got $70 in your pocket yearning to be spent on gifting frivolity, you might want to seriously consider this gadget.

The Egg Minder makes sure your day always starts off "sunny side up." You'll never be in a scramble for a good egg again.

Product Specifications

• Device syncs with your smartphone to tell you how many eggs you've got at home and when they're going bad.


• Connects to the Wink app over Wi-Fi


• Compatibility: iOS 6 and above, iPhone 4 and above, and Android phones/tablets with OS 2.2 or higher


• Great for families and impromptu chefs


• LED notification of oldest egg


• App notifications upon low egg inventory


• Check your inventory from the store


• Playful design–kids will love to unpack the eggs


• Capacity: 14 eggs


• Materials: Plastic, acrylic, LED lights, Wi-Fi chip


• Batteries: 2 AA (included)


• Dimensions: 14.6" long x 4.4" wide x 3.2" high

Of course you could simply examine the egg tray in the fridge and get a rough approximation of the egg count, but that kind of stone age thinking is fast falling by the wayside; only dinosaurs do that kinda shit anymore. Modern people need systems to count for them and send critical phone notifications.

As a gag gift for a Neo-Luddite, this thing would be perfect. Do it as a 2-stage gift. Give'em the gizmo first, then hand them another gift -- a hammer. Guaranteed good times and laughs for all.

posted by Purp at 08:52 PM

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