I actually liked this guy as an actor several years back. I thought he did a decent job of playing a badass good guy in a show I happened upon.

Now his over-acting and dumbass, obvious posturing make him look worse than a B-movie actor who can't decide whether something needs to come out of his ass or go in it.

Ah, David Caruso again. That was funny, but this old post by Ace actually made me laugh more:

I'm not sure why the other two CSI shows so completely fail to capture the giddily-macabre magic of the original. I guess the main problem with CSI: Miami is that David Caruso seems hellbent to convince me every episode he's gay, what with the queeny line-deliveries, "vogue-ing" body language, and constantly putting on and taking off his $800 sunglasses.

The guy cannot interrogate a witness without foppishly snapping off those stupid sunglassess. "Ricky," he will say to a perp as he snaps off the sunglasses, "these pictures show you entering the scene of the crime three minutes before Maria Santos was murdered." Then he'll get kissably close to Ricky and say "I'm going to nail you hard," and then snap on the sunglasses again.

He's got a whole thing with the sunglasses. They come off to talk about evidence and come back on for his exit-line. A man could make a whole drinking game out of the sunglasses on, sunglasses off thing, if one was determined to become a degenerate alcoholic within the span of a 60 minute crime drama.

Oh-- and also, the show just sucks, generally. I blame Caruso. The show is all about him, his heroics, his conflicted soul, his... indeterminate sexual orientation. And of course his fucking sunglasses.

Sure, it's not "night of the sodomizing cougar-man" funny, but it's good storytelling - the stuff dreams are made of.

Well, as long as they have Emily Procter brandishing guns on a regular basis, I can fast forward past the sunglass porn.

This is funny. Best laugh I've had all week.

BTW, you might get a smile if you rent "Officer and a Gentlemen".

In a scene with Lou Gossett, Caruso gets his butt kicked and he slinks away like a crybaby. I love it.

The two new shows don't make enough of a distinction between the cops and the criminalists like the original. In the original, at the beginning at least, I don't think the CSI people even had badges or guns.

They still don't have badges and always correct people when they're called cops.

They practice with guns (as the rule dictates) but usually don't carry them. At least they don't draw them.

CSI: Miami is basically not even a CSI show at all it's more of a straight detective show, with occasional thrilling montages of gas-chromography.

As for the distinction between cops and CSI: this might just depend on what force you work for. There might not be as much of a separation between them in NY and Miami, so that may be accurate, for all I know.

Of course, in both of the derivative shows, the main character is actually a badge-carrying detective, whereas in the original Grissom is strictly a labrat civilian who just happens to work for a branch of the PD.

Who gives a sh*t about David F-ing Caruso? Emily Procter is sooo hot! Love those icy blondes.

Not only are CSIs distinct from "regular" police in Miami, they are distinguished from each other.

Miami-Dade Police Department has a Crime Scene Investigations Bureau, responsible for processing crime scenes, fingerprinting and forensic imaging.

Separately, there is a Crime Laboratory Bureau. The Crime Lab does chemical analysis (including trace), biology/serology and forensic identification (divided into firearms and documents units).

CSI: Miami mixes those sections up. The latter is mostly scientists, not sworn officers. CSI: Miami also throws the Medical Examiner's Office, separate from the MDPD entirely.

And what's with Caruso always hunching over so that he has to look up at everyone?
Its like he wants to play Castillo from Miami Vice: Super smart mysterious ass-kicker. Except Caruso has got no gravitas.
And who the fuck goes to confession with blood literally on their hands? Everyone knows you clean up so they go easy on ya.
And how does a cop afford $800 sunglasses anyway?

What's with the CSI Miami Medical Examiner calling all the dead people "Baby"? She is always "Poor baby, let's see what killed you." Ugh. Plus, why would a medical examiner show up in sweet-assed tailored suits and Channel sunglasses? Someone is on the take.

Huh, I like CSI Miami. CSI New York is just one too many, IMO, but I like Sinise enough to forgive it.

I like David Caruso, too. He's like a red-headed Errol Flynn.

On the plus side, the Miami franchise always had one of the three hotties make a big display of cleavage each episode. This has decline recently but without fail in the first few season one of them would always bend over directly in line with the camera for an excellent view.

I can only imagine the CSI: Tokyo franchise would do the same with upskirt shots.

In general I think it's a good thing they've sought to give each version a distinct character. The Miami show has the biggest problem with pomposity and the world's most expensive police HQ and incredibly elaborate and fancy software. Having done some IT work for a police department in LA County this part always inspires laughter.

Is it just me, or does the replacement for Speedle the worst-cast punk kid ever? He looks like Scott Baio (Chachi) and is completely unbelievable as a scientist. What a joke!

Tried the drinking game with the sunglasses only one week and then with the glasses and the voguing last week and fininshed the bottle with 12 minutes left. He must be sensitive to the sunglass problem as they don't seem to come off as often as they used to. Now you have to add the voguing to really get a buzz!!!

Is it just me, or does the replacement for Speedle the worst-cast punk kid ever? He looks like Scott Baio (Chachi) and is completely unbelievable as a scientist. What a joke!

I call him Greg #2, since I can't tell him from Greg on the real CSI.

Steph,

I don't know... I just saw a repeat, but he was snappin' those babies on and off every three seconds.

Re: Cleavage

I don't like the chick in CSI: NY, but she bent over for the camera with a v-neck for like 30 seconds last episode. I thought I was watching Cinemax's Busty Cops.

Then he'll get kissably close to Ricky and say "I'm going to nail you hard,"

Haha, you made me chuckle! A rare thing!

CSI: Miami is the worst of the three. Caruso sucks! Also their plots are so ridiculously over the top unlike the original which is usually a "neighborhood crime" you could see happening down the street.

CSI: NY also doesn't have the solid writing of the original, but at least they don't have a fag for the lead.

I still watch all 3 of them though.

I still think Carusos best performance was his turn as Kit Kat in Hudson Hawk. I'm pretty sure that's cause he never said a damned word, though. Or maybe because he wore a dress...

Who watches these train wrecks? Each CSI show is the dullest, most formulaic thing since... the last CSI show.

I'm dying without BSG here.

Casting directors are so incredibly lazy it's ridiculous. Every medical examiner is now a black woman, e.g., CSI Miami & L&O. My neighbor, who is black, also has been cast in a couple of roles as a medical examiner.

In my opinion, almost everything on popular tv sucks. To those hooked on the tube, I say get a life, read a book.