She likes John Travolta, who is dancing and moving his stomach as quick as the –

Quick as the what??

Kelly Preston's a beard?
That's a shame.

Ace, I remember you used to be a bit more wary about making bold comments about Islam. What happened?

(Not asking in hostility, but out of curiosity).

"Quick as a mujahid comes in his pants when on his wedding night as he sees his new bride's hair and ankles for the first time."

But if your children do care a tin monkey about you they will become martyrs.

Martyrdom is where the really great sex is at...72 virgins for the guys. John Tavolta for the girls.

I bet you daughters can hardly wait for the Saturday Night Fever that awaits you in paradise.

I like the picture of John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John in the article. If that's a threat to the caliphate, then I'm afraid that the jihad is in big trouble.

It's gotta be a strange twist of fate
Telling me that heaven can wait

Ooh, la la. C'est droll to hear you repressed Americans make fun of ze sexualite of ze mujahideen, when you are so yourselves repressed that you do not make love to ze statuary in your cemeteries or pleasure yourselves in front of young women to pass ze time when riding on your Metros. Bof!

Also, John Travolta's a good looking dude and all. But isn't he getting a little long in the tooth to be making Muslim girls go weak in the knees? I half expect now to hear about how Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey are going to be the inspiration for Islamic jailbait to tell their parents to go fuck themselves.

"Quick as a mujahid comes in his pants when on his wedding night as he sees his new bride's hair and ankles for the first time."

Apparantly, if he sees anymore of her they are automatically divorced.

These freaks would find Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers movies too hot and heavy.

Grease is the word!

I can see where Abu Hamza is coming from. I watch Travolta shaking his stomach as fast as ... well, something pretyy fast, and I get pretty weak in the knees. I mean, he's no Powers Boothe, but...

I mean, he's no Powers Boothe, but...

What about Chris Klein?

Ooops!

That (Chris Klein) was me.

Travlota, gay? There have been rumors.

A baboon is better looking than those radical muslim clerics. I mean really, they are disgusting. Besides the fact that most have no arms and you would have to wipe their ass all the time.

John Travolta is most certainly gay. And if you watched South Park, you would know that he refuses to come out of the closet!

John Travolta is kind of pudgy to be gay, isn't he? Are you sure you're not mixing him up with that other closeted gay Scientologist?

Ace, your suggestion is a good one - the internet pr0n equivalent of Radio Free Europe. I'm putting my resume in for the board of directors.

Nah, just broadcast Telemundo over there.

Arab men can't join the mujahedeen if they're watching Spanish soap operas with their hands down their pants.

The cult is not based on fear of sexuality, just fear.
Period. They kill their own kids to save the honor of the family. Basically, to most civilized folks, they're nuts.

What a little bitch that daughter is!!
Tin monkey!
Shit, that's not even held in as high a regard as the brass monkey!

if they're watching Spanish soap operas with their hands down their pants.

what? I'm sorry, I don't speak Spanish.

That funky monkey.

Top Shelf Pooter is gonna be the title of my next album. Y'all be on the lookout for the hit single "Mexican Soap Opera". I'll be singin it to the tune of "Stroke Me" by Billy Squier.

"Bart Simpson is making love to your wife"

"Mickey Mouse is kaput! Disneyland is kaput!"

I think sexuality in the Muslim world is like alcohol for prohibitionist groups: instead of teaching people to use it responsibly, they just want to ban it 'cause that's easier.

And, of course, it doesn't work.

"This brother he's a mujahid [freedom fighter] and she looks at him and says, 'Oh look, his forehead is black, probably he's praying'. She likes John Travolta, who is dancing and moving his stomach as quick as the – as I don't know what – and she likes that because if he was wearing the proper dress which has been imposed on him by Muslims, she wouldn't even think about him," Hamza said in a taped address.

From Elvis' hips to Travolta's stomach, danger and temptation loom at every corner as young girls make their perilous way towards adulthood and a (virtuous!) lifelong servitude. Sadly, many fall prey to "the stomache" just as they once fell to "the hips". The Muslims For a 'Mohammed is Sexy Too, Curse You' Way is working hard every day to save them from that fate - please give generously.

Thank you (you son of a pig and a monkey you)

Travolta is no longer the big heart throb he used to be just another avrage liberal fool

HE speaks!

Travolta is no longer the big heart throb he used to be just another avrage liberal fool.

Actually, Travolta is pretty conservative.

Ace, I remember you used to be a bit more wary about making bold comments about Islam. What happened?

Ace is angling for a Fartwa!

Ace, you blasphemous American infidel pig-dig! May Allah (no, the other one), all praise be upon him, strike you down while you are watching Telemundo, reading the closed captioning, all the while spanking your monkey.

"This entire psychotic cult is based on a fear of sexuality of even the most minor kind."

Then is the high muslim fertility rate attributable to virgin births?

I'm pleased that Americans are so sex-positive, but I don't see all that activity leading to much of anything. If muslims are really so repressed, on the other hand, then their men must have developed a one shot, one hit tactic in reproduction.

I'm pleased that Americans are so sex-positive, but I don't see all that activity leading to much of anything. If muslims are really so repressed, on the other hand, then their men must have developed a one shot, one hit tactic in reproduction.

It's not that Americans need Viagra, it's that muslims practice polygamy. Think about it.

Victorians outbred us, and they made up euphemisms for chicken legs. They put little skirts on pianos. Because their sperm worked OK, that means they weren't screwed up?