Intermarkets' Privacy Policy
Support


Donate to Ace of Spades HQ!


Contact
Ace:
aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com
Buck:
buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com
CBD:
cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com
joe mannix:
mannix2024 at proton.me
MisHum:
petmorons at gee mail.com
J.J. Sefton:
sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com


Recent Entries
Absent Friends
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024
Captain Hate 2023
moon_over_vermont 2023
westminsterdogshow 2023
Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022
Dave In Texas 2022
Jesse in D.C. 2022
OregonMuse 2022
redc1c4 2021
Tami 2021
Chavez the Hugo 2020
Ibguy 2020
Rickl 2019
Joffen 2014
AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me
Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups






















« Counterfeiters Fob Off $100 Bills, Featuring Lincoln's Face | Main | Martha's Apprentice Just Isn't Fitting In »
November 14, 2005

Top Ten Signs of a Counterfeit $100 Bill

10. Motto "In God We Trust" has been replaced by "If this van's a-rockin', don't come a-knockin'"

9. Back of bill features image of Jefferson Memorial being attacked by Godzilla and Japanese Zero fighters

8. Real bills are printed on special paper with high linen content, not various pages of The Ultimate Collection of Fart Jokes by Nether Winds

7. Corners of bill identify it not as "One Hundred Dollars," but "Hundred Buck Cash-Money, Baby!"

6. American Eagle's head faces the wrong way; also, the Eagle has a massive throbbing erection (which also faces the wrong way)

5. Real bills identify themselves as legal tender, not "Mitch's Free Money Bonanza"

4. Portrait is not of Bejamin Franklin, but either of 1) Abraham Lincoln or 2) "Ziggy" from Quantum Leap

3. Bill's serial number is "4." Just "4."

2. Contrary to implication of signature on bill, the position of Secretary of the Treasury has never held by been Mookie Wilson

...and the Number One Sign of a Counterfeit $100 Bill...

1. When angled to the light, bill displays watermark of Yasmine Bleeth holding Bob Dole's cock


posted by Ace at 03:21 PM
Comments



So, that's whose cock that is.

Posted by: joeindc44 on November 14, 2005 03:58 PM

Bill shows pink teddy bears

Posted by: spurwing plover on November 14, 2005 04:03 PM

So let's see....... get your ass handed to you in the world's most important and highly visible election, and Yasmine Bleath will hold your cock. Where the fuck do I sign up for some of that?

Posted by: Sticky B on November 14, 2005 05:14 PM

Wasn't "Ziggy" never actually shown on screen?

Posted by: Knemon on November 14, 2005 06:34 PM

I thought Ziggy was just the little hand-computer that made funny noises, and that was shown all the time.

Posted by: ace on November 14, 2005 06:45 PM

Actually, I think that was just a portable hand-held access terminal for Ziggy. Ziggy itself was a massive AI system back at the Quantum Leap project headquarters.

Posted by: Xoxotl on November 14, 2005 07:14 PM

I thought ziggy was the tech who ran the computer back at the base. Al was always getting betting line updates from Ziggy while Sam was trying to save the victim du jour (oh yeah, like Sam wasn't a freakin' degenerate gambler).

I seem to remember Ziggy showing up in one of the later episodes when Al was indisposed for some reason related to Sam's leap. I don't remember the actor's name, but he looked a lot like Michael Jeter & Kurt Vonnegut's bastard love child.

Posted by: Russ from Winterset on November 14, 2005 08:37 PM

jeez, I'm such a 'tard. Ziggy WAS the computer. The dude I was thinking of was "Gushy". Looooooooooose shit.

Posted by: Russ from Winterset on November 14, 2005 08:38 PM

Probably thinking of Gushy. Gushy was the dude played by that really frenetic, overcaffeinated comic, Dennis Wolfberg, or something.

Posted by: Matt on November 14, 2005 09:47 PM

I've found that the blue paper and bits of cheese left over from the Filet-O-Fish are a good tip off to a bad forgery.

Posted by: Purple Avenger on November 14, 2005 10:05 PM

Man, your command of popular culture makes me laugh my ass off!

Mookie Wilson? Where on earth did you pull that from??

Posted by: Kevin on November 15, 2005 01:01 AM
Post a comment
Name:


Email Address:


URL:


Comments:


Remember info?








Now Available!
The Deplorable Gourmet
A Horde-sourced Cookbook
[All profits go to charity]
Top Headlines
CJN podcast 1400 copy.jpg
Podcast: CBD and Sefton discuss the Los Angeles fires and the culpability of the Democrat/Progressive complex, Deportation as a perfectly acceptable policy, and whether Carter was the worst president!
Thune: Hegseth has the votes to be confirmed SecDef
Also, Trump told two "no" votes on Johnson that they're "being ridiculous" and stepping all over the agenda that the country voted for. They changed their votes to "yes."
HISTORIC: Kamala Harris becomes the first woman of color to certify her own election loss before Congress

Posted by: Anonosaurus Wrecks, Now Is the Winter of Our Discontent at January 06, 2025
The winds of change are coming. [dri]
FBI investigating reports of an effort to bomb SpaceX's Boca Chica Starship facility In an interview Friday, he said he was there on the afternoon of Christmas Eve when an SUV pulled up with five male passengers who rolled down their windows to converse. They said they were from the Middle East. “I said something like, ‘What are y’all here for? ’ and the driver said, ‘Oh, we’re here to blow (Starship) up,’ ” Wehrle said. “I just went stone cold, and he said, ‘Oh, I got you. I was joking.’ ” As the conversation went on, though, Wehrle’s visitors said at least three times they were in South Texas to attack Starship. He reported the incident to SpaceX and the sheriff’s office and said he was contacted later by an investigator.
CJN podcast 1400 copy.jpg
Podcast: Happy New Year! We discuss the New Orleans Islamic terrorist attack, the stupidity of the current security apparatus, and more!
Election Night, as the taxpayer-funded PBS covered it
Jonathan Capeheart is just a hissing, squealing deflating balloon!
Recent Comments
Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ : "--- I think it was Labour. Do the Liberals even h ..."

Commissar of Plenty and Lysenkoism in Solidarity with festive little hats and interpretive dance.: "Hello from the smokey San Fernando valley. ..."

Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight, Concertina Czar: "No, they changed the name to Liberal Democrats and ..."

Don Black: "The order states: The application for stay pres ..."

Ace-Endorsed Author A.H. Lloyd: "I think the Liberal Party has been dead since the ..."

People's Hippo Voice: "The absolute #1 first order of business of Kash Pa ..."

Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ : "Canada's Trudeau Whines He Was Forced to Resign Be ..."

Ace-Endorsed Author A.H. Lloyd: "I think is the part that angers me the most. The S ..."

Anonosaurus Wrecks, Now Is the Winter of Our Discontent [/s][/b][/u][/i]: "Whole bunch of Juan Smithos. Ohio Meat Company ..."

Captain Obvious, Laird o' the Sea, Radioactive Knight, Concertina Czar: "I think it was Labour. Do the Liberals even have a ..."

bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door : "Can't any public official give a briefing without ..."

Eromero: "Posted by: RedMindBlueState at January 11, 2025 11 ..."

Bloggers in Arms
Some Humorous Asides
Archives