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August 09, 2005

Man Dies After 50 Hour Video Game Marathon

Pretty high price to pay for that "You Are Ultimate Winner!" screen at the end of Japanese video games.

failure minutes after finishing his mammoth session in an Internet cafe, authorities said Tuesday.
The 28-year-old man, identified only by his family name Lee, had been playing on-line battle simulation games at the cybercafe in the southeastern city of Taegu, police said.

Lee had planted himself in front of a computer monitor to play on-line games on Aug. 3. He only left the spot over the next three days to go to the toilet and take brief naps on a makeshift bed, they said.

"We presume the cause of death was heart failure stemming from exhaustion," a Taegu provincial police official said by telephone.

Lee had recently quit his job to spend more time playing games, the daily JoongAng Ilbo reported after interviewing former work colleagues and staff at the Internet cafe.

NAKED COMPROMISING-POSITION CAR CRASH GUY: Hey.

VIDEO GAME GUY: Hey. So... how'd you end up here?

NCPCCG: I was driving my car at sixty miles an hour getting a wettie from a high-priced call-girl. You?

VGG: I, uh, unlocked the special secret Combat Arena level and I got the Silver Key to the wizard's fortress. Then I, uh, had a heart attack.

NCPCCG: I... see...

VGG: It's not as dorky as it sounds. See, I used the Red Amulet to open the doors to the Black Mage's Lair and then I killed a fire-breathing ogre.

NCPCCG: ...

VGG: And I was totally maximally levelled-up when I went.

NCPCCG: ...

VGG (sighing): I think I've made a terrible mistake. You think they'll have call-girls in heaven?

NCPCCG: I find that doubtful in the extreme.

Thanks to VonKreedon.

posted by Ace at 02:23 PM

Comments

I just tried to pronounce "totally maximally levelled-up" in my best faux-Chinese accent, and my tongue exploded.

Posted by: S. Weasel on August 9, 2005 02:30 PM

Looks like it's quite a trendy way to go over there.

Posted by: apotheosis on August 9, 2005 02:38 PM

And again...

...zergrush.

Posted by: apotheosis on August 9, 2005 02:39 PM

Looks as if all his base are belong to us now.

Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge on August 9, 2005 02:55 PM

"Lee had recently quit his job to spend more time playing games"

I have thought about this more than once, though I don' t know whether out of a love for games or periodic dislike for my job.

Posted by: Lapsed Leftist on August 9, 2005 02:57 PM

From what I've heard, this is becoming fairly common in South Korea.

Posted by: Sean M. on August 9, 2005 03:43 PM

This is interesting but I am still waiting for the first death caused by having an erection lasting more than 4 hours.

Posted by: Dman on August 9, 2005 04:33 PM

Dman wrote: "This is interesting but I am still waiting for the first death caused by having an erection lasting more than 4 hours."

After the priapism has caused Mr. Happy to fall off from gangrene you'll gladly kill yourself.

Posted by: Yeff on August 9, 2005 04:50 PM

I always hoped the Matrix trilogy to end with the horrible realization that there was no machine vs. man war; the whole Zion vs the Machines gig was just another shell in the Matrix.

The ugly truth was that humanity programmed the machines to tend to their bodily needs, and then plugged en-mass into the virtual world. It would have been a much better ending.

It could happen.

Posted by: Scott Free on August 9, 2005 05:23 PM

It could happen.

How do you know it hasn't happened already?

Posted by: Michael on August 9, 2005 07:12 PM

Hey Michael, just wanted you to know that I saw a potato cannon in action over the weekend.
Funny how unusual topics will recur in a short period of time like that.

My little brother's friends; this kid built it from PVC. Stuff a potato or two (they switched to lemons later and it really smelled nice) down the barrel, push it down with a broomstick, open the back hatch and spray in some hairspray, close the hatch and push the spark button.

They set up a wooden target in my dad's backyard and I have to admit it was high-larious. The thing broke apart and they put it back together with duct tape and kept shooting, which I thought was rather brazen.

My husband kept looking at me furtively and making these whining noises; "THAT would scare the coyotes away from our yard."

Posted by: lauraw on August 9, 2005 09:19 PM

--the cannon barrel broke apart, not the target.

Posted by: lauraw on August 9, 2005 09:21 PM

Oh, and did you know that Canadian researchers did genetic testing and confirmed that Eastern Coyotes have wolf DNA? That's why they are so much bigger than the Coyotes are out West.

I've seen some in my yard that looked pretty much the same size as a thinnish German Shepherd, with a coyote face.

Hate the frickin things with a passion.

Posted by: lauraw on August 9, 2005 09:25 PM

Er, clumsy threadjacking.

Next time I'll try to be more graceful.

Posted by: lauraw on August 9, 2005 09:27 PM

Duct tape.

I swear, you could rebuild a transmission and perform an appendectomy with duct tape.

Posted by: Dave in Texas on August 9, 2005 09:36 PM

The cannon fired and broke apart simultaneously.

And a small group of 19 + 20 yr olds inspected the damage with much cussing and recrimination ("Andrew, you break fucking everything you fucking touch! What the fuck!").
And several heads popped up, yelling, 'Duct tape!'

Like baby ducks wailing for their mama.

It is the go-to cure-all of our century.

Posted by: lauraw on August 9, 2005 10:14 PM

Ace- you kill me with this kind of humor.

Posted by: HundredPercenter on August 10, 2005 12:32 AM

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Top Headlines

Whoops! I posted about Dan Goldman losing the NY congressional primary. He might do that, but it won't be tonight -- the primary isn't held until June 23.

One race to keep an eye on: the Levi's heir nepo baby and egregious "Designated Liar" Dan Goldman -- one of the Democrats from a safe district Democrats send out to spread their most indefensible lies -- may actually lose his lower Manhattan/Brooklyn set due to, get this, antisemitism in the Democrat primary electorate.
Antisemitism? In the anti-Nazi Democrat Party? Sounds crazy, I know, but apparently the anti-Nazi Party wants to eliminate Jews.

Henry Rosoff
@HenryRosoff

🚨EXCLUSIVE POLL:

Brad Lander is 34-pts ahead of Congressman Dan Goldman with #NY10 Democratic Primary voters. @ZohranKMamdani is backing the former Comptroller.

@bradlander: 57%

@danielsgoldman: 23%

Poll by @PIX11News & @EmersonPolling.

MORE: http://pix11.com

Oh my Totenkopf Tattoo, that is a DRUBBING!
I'm usually very anti-antisemitism but if the Communist Antisemite Jihadists can pull this one off, Go Communist Antisemite Jihadists, Go!

Democrat Senator Rueben Gallego, who served his wife with divorce papers when she was nine months pregnant so that he could marry his side-piece, counsels us that we should not judge Graham Platner for his infidelity because these things are personal matters, Racists:

Sahil Kapur
@sahilkapur

Sen. Ruben Gallego, D-Ariz., on Platner: "We know that Graham has lived not your typical political experience. He's been very clear and open with his wife, and they worked through whatever they worked through. At the end of the day, this man has had 60 more town halls than Susan Collins has. He's winning the polls, he's willing to accept that he has grown as a person, and I think we should accept that."

Gallego says the drip-drip of revelations won't harm Platner's campaign.

"I think you guys are all in a bubble here right now. The drip, drip that's actually happening is Americans are really, really hurt the fact that gas is still high, food is still high, they can't buy a home, you can't afford rent. They're not going to care about text messages and everything else like that that happened years ago, especially when it was worked out between spouses."

I like that he says that it's okay that Graham Platner sexted 12 different women within months of marrying the woman to sponge off her because he wasn't then "living a political life" -- the clear meaning being, "We all cheat, we just don't cheat when we're running for office, and he didn't know he was running for office when he was sending dicpics to half the women he ran into."
Except he was running: His own wife turned the sexts over to his campaign.
And obviously Reuben Gallego didn't let his "political life" get in the way of his extramarital dating life:

Podcast: CBD goes solo in a short segment...talking about Iran, the nativist issues surrounding Reform and Restore in the UK, and the delicious pain of an imploding Democrat Party, courtesy of Talerico and Platner!

TJM ranks all of John Ford's films. All of them. TJM is very tired.

Funny -- if you don't mind clicking on TikTok. "Amy.Pranks.22" set up an AI scam-call screener which replies to a foreign scammer trying to get her bank information with Trumpian bluster. This might be fake because I don't see how a program can respond in real time, but it's funny.

Food Thread Pizza Dough Recipe

The ULA rocket just launched
Thanks to Joyenz
The rocket's enormous engines are fueled by "the volcanic heterosexual lust between James Talarico and his Neighbor With a Uterus 'girlfriend'"
I hope Amazon's rocket works better than the Amazon Prime app does as far as allowing people to watch the black and white version of "Spider-Noir"

From the CA Post:

Spencer Pratt is now Karen Bass' biggest headache.

A bombshell California Post poll conducted with McLaughlin & Associates shows the reality TV star-turned-mayoral candidate has surged to a statistical tie with the incumbent mayor.

And voters blame homelessness, affordability and the direction of Los Angeles as the reason for turning on Bass.

Pratt now leads the field with 30.1% support, compared with 29.5% for Bass, setting up a razor-thin race heading into next week's primary.

Socialist councilwoman Nithya Raman sits in third place at 23.4%.

Thanks to beckster

Just like "Spartacus" Corey Booker, now that James Talarico is running for a higher office, he unveils his previously-unknown "girlfriend" and hooboy, it just so happens she used to work for him, and, get this, likes to "dance the night away" at gay bars
Gee I wonder where they might have met
Oh and she's a vegan
When Corey Booker needed a "girlfriend," he conjured up known LGBTQ activist Rosario Dawson. How convenient that when these guys need a girlfriend to show off to the normies that just happen to find an activist with a strong history of and interest in Supporting Gay Men
But seriously, this James Talarico romance with a Neighbor with a Uterus is a love story for the ages. The passion of their lovemaking is hotter than a blue star with a core of Primordial Sex Atoms created in the Big Bang

"Journalists" are all drunks, criminals, sex-pests, and liars, exhibit #25,239,331

And just like that, #PunchANazi became Punch a Ballot for a Nazi

Was the "transatlantic accent" favored by stage and screen actors of the 40s and 50s "fake"? This linguist says no, it was a real accent

"Teen" charged with five counts of attempted murder after attempting to run down police officers with his car in yet another "teen takeover" permitted by woke racist incompetent Chicago mayor Brandon Johnson
Johnson's response to the "teen takeovers" of streets and businesses that he refuses to make arrests to stop is to go after social media companies for not deleting messages to coordinate the "teen takeovers." Um, they're supposed to find these messages and delete them in real time?
It makes no sense but he has to offer an "alternative" plan to just arresting lawbreakers -- which he absolutely refuses to do, saying we "can't arrest our way out" of rampant crime.

The Babylon Bee's crack AI team uses AI crack to simulate the first woman president

TJM explores the world of John Ford movies.

Future Tucker Carlson guest James Talarico:

James Talarico
@jamestalarico

Black Americans in a church.

Mexican Americans in a store.

Asian Americans in a spa.

Radicalized white men are the greatest domestic terrorist threat in our country.

He's referring to three mass attacks committed by white men in, oh, the past six or eight years. There were a huge number of mass shootings and bombings he had to skip over to cherry pick three committed by white men. Which kind of makes me think that "white men" are not the greatest terrorist threat in our country.
No, I doubt he'll be a guest on Tucker Carlson. The only thing that Tucker clings to that he claims makes him "conservative" is a palpable hatred of gays. Any time there's a communist enslaving their population and executing dissenters and conservatives, Tucker praises that dictator by saying "at least he represses the homos!"

Podcast: CBD and J.J. Sefton discuss the newest iteration of the Iranian negotiations, with the hope that the President will stick to his guns and get rid of the nuclear material, Minneapolis mayor Frey is scum, and an idiot, Artificial Intelligence, and more!

Polls close in Texas at 7pm local (8pm for the East Coast). Vote the RINO out.

TJM celebrates Memorial Day the only way he knows how.