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January 21, 2006
That chick who had the face transplant is using new lips to smokeAll she's been longin' for since the dog-maulin' is a long, hard suck....from a cigarette: The world's first face-transplant patient is using her new lips to smoke cigarettes, alarming the French surgical team that performed the pioneering surgery in November. Sources say 'Isabelle' also plans on using her new lips to ask her slimy ex-boyfriend to return her Jerry Lewis DVD collection. [Guest-blogger Feisty, ardent practitioner of the Ace of Spades Lifestyle (TM), can be found here, yo.] posted by Feisty at 07:27 PM
CommentsHey, when ya gotta smoke, ya gotta smoke, yannow? Posted by: CraigC on January 21, 2006 07:33 PM
Oh, and hello, gorgeous. Posted by: CraigC on January 21, 2006 07:34 PM
Hellllooooo my hot, muscular readers. I dunno, I guess I'd forgo the smoke if it was going to make make my face rot off, but, I'm not French. Posted by: Feisty on January 21, 2006 07:39 PM
Hellllooooo my hot, muscular readers. Hey! I'm here too! [hint: to include BrewFan you need something along the lines of "Hellloooo my more mature, slightly paunchy but otherwise nice readers"] Posted by: BrewFan on January 21, 2006 07:43 PM
Wow, that chick sounds kinda... feisty. With a Frenchy, feisty way of doing things. Like knocking you completely unconscious with the smell/sight of her pit odor/underarm thatch milliseconds before the force of her unseen/unanticipated open-palmed-with-sharpened-and-slighty-curved-fingernails-immediately-following roundhouse slap shocks your face with daggers of flamey, adrenalin-boiling, electric pain. Yeah, one of THOSE kinda chicks... Posted by: Dogstar on January 21, 2006 07:44 PM
Actually, you had us at "suck". Posted by: All The Guys on January 21, 2006 07:46 PM
The article didn't mention she has already gone back to her old job - you can see her in Parisian Bukkake #5. Posted by: steve_in_hb on January 21, 2006 07:47 PM
Ok, Brewfan: HELLLLLOOOOO all readers of every shape and size! Suck. Suck. Suck. Long. Hard. Suck. Sorry, I'm getting ready to hit the bar in a couple of hours, so I'm getting myself all 'fired up'. Suck. Suck. Suck. Suck. Posted by: Feisty on January 21, 2006 07:54 PM
Oh my. I don't have to use my coupon for that, do I? Posted by: BrewFan on January 21, 2006 07:56 PM
In my experience a bar is the method used to get the girl to suck suck suck. I didn't believe the process could be reversed. Posted by: steve_in_hb on January 21, 2006 07:57 PM
Dang Feisty. You and I should go out! We'd rule. And the face transplant chick, she sucks but probably does not swallow. Posted by: KevlarChick on January 21, 2006 08:04 PM
From reading the article, Kevlar-darling, it appears she spits it right back out. The smoke, that is. Uppity little French chick. Posted by: Feisty on January 21, 2006 08:07 PM
Yeah, those uppity French bukkake chicks. They don't swallow and all they do is cry. WAAAAH! Fiesty, do you need one of our white-hot thugs here at AoS to act as your butler tonight? Sounds like you might need someone to uh, back you up. Second thought, maybe not... Posted by: KevlarChick on January 21, 2006 08:15 PM
What in the hell is diversity? Is it like an old wooden ship? From the Civil War? Posted by: Dave in Texas on January 21, 2006 08:15 PM
Dave in Texas , Do you need to consult Strunk, Funk, and the dirty little Punk on that vocabulary word "diversity?" I'll tell ya what it means, my white-hot man. It means NO French chicks for YOU! They won't be able to handle your, um, diversity. Posted by: KevlarChick on January 21, 2006 08:32 PM
well, voulez vous couchet avec dang, god-dang. s'ok. I prefer American Ladies™ Posted by: Dave in Texas on January 21, 2006 08:54 PM
Fucking fwench. Posted by: Uncle Jefe on January 21, 2006 09:02 PM
She got herself a facelift Posted by: spurwing plover on January 21, 2006 11:06 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
NYT Melts Down Over Texas Rangers Statue Outside... Texas Rangers' Stadium
"The Athletic posted a lengthy article about a statue outside Globe Life Field, presenting a virtue-signaling moral grievance as unbiased news coverage." [CBD]
Important Message from Recent Convert to Christianity and Yet Super-Serious Christian Tuq'r Qarlson: Actually Muslims love Jesus, it's Trump and his neocons who hate him
Tucker Carlson Network Trump's trolling tweet was ill-advised, but Tucker is just lying when he claims the Christianity-hating President of Iran was "offended" by this. He's one step away from announcing his official conversion to Islam. He literally never stops praising Islam. Well, he suddenly became Christian two years ago, there's not much stopping him from converting again. You can track Tuq'r's official conversion to Islam with this Bingo card.
People say that the bearded man in the video of Fartwell molesting a hooker looks like Democrat Arizona Senator Rueben Gallego, said to be Swalwell's "best friend" and known to take vacations with him.
@KFILE 21m So the campaign is collapsing due to the truth of the sexual harassment allegations. That hissing sound you hear is the air going out of the Swalwell campaign. UPDATE: No it wasn't, it was just Swalwell one-cheek-sneaking out a fart on camera Eric Swalwell more like Eric Farewell amirite thanks to weft-cut loop.
This is the dumbest AI bullslop I've seen in a while: the CIA can use "quantum magnetometry" to track an individual man's heartbeat from twelve miles away
I wouldn't click on it, it's not interesting, it's just stupid clickslop. I just want to share my annoyance with you.
Oil prices plunge on bizarre realization that Eric Swalwell may actually be straight. A rapey molester, allegedly, but a straight one.
Classic Rock Mystery Click
This is super-obscure and I only barely remember it. Given that, I'll give you the hint that it's by the Red Rocker. And I guess you think you've got it made Oh, but then, you never were afraid Of anything that you've left behind Oh, but it's alright with me now 'Cause I'll get back up somehow And with a little luck, yes, I'm bound to win Now twenty people will tell me it's not obscure, it was huge in their hometown and played at their prom. That's how it usually goes. When I linked Donnie Iris's "Love is Like a Rock," everyone said they knew that one and that his other song (which I didn't know at all) Ah Leah! was huge in their area.
Ryan Long goes to the No Kings rally to pick up young liberal hotties and is greatly disappointed in the quality of the mish
thanks to stevey You know we "joke" about the GOPe just "conserving" leftist things? I couldn't hate this queen of the cuck-chair more if it paid seven figures and came with a corner office. Recent Comments
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TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films: "Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? ..." Archimedes: "New one: Eric Swalwell Charged 100 Big Booze De ..." Sponge - F*ck Cancer: "[i]We are in sync today Sponge. Kinda eerie. Post ..." tubal: "We are in sync today Sponge. Kinda eerie. ..." bill in arkansas, not gonna comply with nuttin, waiting for the 0300 knock on the door : "Jane Seymour, TEMU Julie Andrews. ..." Bulg: "Sedan is where? Posted by: Boss Moss Frankist ..." tubal: "401 Sedan is where? Posted by: Boss Moss at April ..." Sponge - F*ck Cancer: "[i]Sedan is where? Posted by: Boss Moss at April ..." TheJamesMadison, discovering British horror with Hammer Films: "391 This is especially true in wartime, where the ..." Boss Moss: "Sedan is where? ..." Sponge - F*ck Cancer: "[i]Don't care. Still a "1". Posted by: Hadrian th ..." Bloggers in Arms
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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