"Let's not get stuck on stupid" is bold.

"You're stuck on stupid" is fearless. I wonder what the reporter's face looked like when he received that bit of wisdom.

Gen. Honore is a man of action who tries to get things done and doesn't worry about the past except maybe how it can be analyzed to improve things in the future. He could not be more explicit that this is how he thinks about problems, and it is instructive that the press has no idea whatsoever where he's coming from.

It's beautiful. I wonder if I can use it at work tomorrow?

Expect appoplectic shock from the Legacy Media tomorrow.
I can hear the "how dares he!" coming from the fever swamp even as I type this.
I also expect calls for his resignation/firing/balls on a plate from the Chucky Shummer types.

Haaa!!.......excellent Slublog

I wonder what the reporter's face looked like when he received that bit of wisdom.

Video! There must be video of this somewhere.

Video here.

There's hope for this country yet.

Thanks Ace. I only sent you that Celine Dion thing a week ago, and posted about it in your comments.

Way to read your own site, pal ;-)

Cheers,
Dave at Garfield Ridge

P.S. Agreed: instant pantheon of all-time catchphrases. I plan on using it at work tomorrow.

Hey, when he addresses the press as “unorganized grabastic pieces of amphibian shit” then I'll be impressed. :)

That celine dion video was extremely hard to watch, I tried but couldn't finish it

OK as a kind of masochistic challenge I just tried to force myself to watch the whole Celine thing again, and again utterly failed. I really think it is impossible.

I think we could use this video to make terrorists talk, it would work!

You probably did see the whole thing, Idiot. The last chunk of it was her singing a song. Painful, but not as painful as the conversation that came before.

A tragically stupid woman.

LTG Honore gave the press a collective wedgie.

OK as a kind of masochistic challenge I just tried to force myself to watch the whole Celine thing again, and again utterly failed. I really think it is impossible.

I saw a repeat of it on CNN. Yes, CNN was so proud of that little piece of lunacy that a reporter, the next day, showed the clip again. On purpose and said something along the lines of - "this gives you a good idea how much emotion is out there concerning...blah...blah."

Actually, the truly great thing about this Honore's attitude is that it is exactly what the press was demanding a week ago. How many times did some media dolt say on air "someone needs to do something!" If they start to carp about his attitude now they'd lose all of the precious viewers their crying recenty got them.

And for another take on this, along with a take-down of one of the HQ's favourite punching-bags, check out Castle Argghhh! at
http://www.thedonovan.com/archives/004635.html

Dave at Garfield Ridge,

I keep telling you. I would always read your comments. I would NEVER take you for granted.

Geeze, I feel like you are Archie and Ace is Veronica and I'm the ever sweet but ignored Betty.....;-)

I had the same problem with the Celine video. I suspect that after a certain period of time, you feel yourself becoming stupid for having listened to it, and your reflexes take over and shut it down before there's permanent damage.

Lt. Gen. Honore has just made his mark on history.

Betty was hot.

Dave, RWS - either of you in the storm's path? If so, what the heck are you still doing hanging out at blogs?

I wish the administration had the guts to talk to reporters like this all the time, instead of giving them a pass on uninformed snark. If I were the President, and replace Scott McClellan with Dennis Miller, and let him give the WH press corps verbal Swirlies every day.

Oh and Celine Dion should be catapulted back across the northern border.

Normally I love to watch video of liberals self destructing. However in the case of Celine Dion, it is too painful even for me to watch.

Alas poor Larry King, may he rest in peace. King has to dead if he can listen to such babbling without audible response.

I'd like to say that video is just crying out for the Wuzzadem treatment, but how can you parody it?

Slub, Sparkley definitely is in the danger zone, but she's got time to react. The deal there is, leave early and you might not have had to, wait too long and you'll be in a long traffic jam.

Here we're about 240 miles from the coast, so not terribly dangerous. If it stays on track it will be on top of us, and if it's cat4 at landfall, we could see 50-75 mph winds (our DC in Miss. saw 125 mph winds, they are about 150 miles N of where Katrina landed).

There will likely be some tornados. Lots of rain.

My wife's brother and family are bugging out to our place today. They live just west and south of Houston (between two rivers).

Every hotel from San Antonio to OKC is full.

The local authorities on the coast have paid attention to these past few weeks and appear to have their shit together.

You got any friends or family back in Victoria?

Not in Victoria, but in Corpus and Beeville.

RWS--

Really? I always thought of Ace as more of a Moose/Jughead hybrid.

But if you'll be my Betty, well, I may just have to link you more often!

Cheers,
Dave at Garfield Ridge

In June, Gov. Goodhair signed a bill that gives county judges and mayors the authority to enforce mandatory evacuation orders. I expect to see some of those late tomorrow.

Yeah, I'm hoping my grandparents get out of Beeville and go stay with my uncle in San Antonio until this thing passes.

Just sold my house in Houston and the closing was set for 9/29 and I moved into another home on 9/16. Woe is me.

Celine Dion and Kanye West should do a duet. George W. Bush Hates Black People and Canadians (But Escpecially Black Canadians!). She's an idjit, but really, who's surprised at this revelation?

Oh my fucking word. The woman can barely speak English.

Speaking of Canadians; I heard Canada is sending the best of their military might; the 101st Sheetrockers Div. to help with the reconstruction.

10,000 strong and all named Levesque (same mother).

I heard Canada has it's own system of government AND currency. Zut Aloors!

Speaking of "stuck on stupid," Cindy Sheehan just got some bad news: her other son was just found dead in waterlogged New Orleans.

The Onion has the details.

Slublog, they'll know by tomorrow if they need to go. It won't be as hard for them driving up I-37 as it will I-45, TX 36 and SH 290 out of the Houston area.

I love that ..."Stuck on Stupid"!

I am stuck in Houston and it is all Rita 24/7. I will be leaving town tomorrow. One thing I am have been thinking about...all those NOLA people in Houston. I would like to point out (put this on the record somewhere....Ace of Spades HQ seems good enough). ... anyway, I would like to point out we here in the Gulf are used to tropical depression, tropical storms, and hurricanes. It's the joys of summer. For example, we had Allison in 2001 and the entire city was not prepared for it (it was supposed to pass through and it decided to stick around for a few days) but NOTHING like NOLA happened. Everyone was civilized and obeyed there was no break down in law and order. The entire city was not looted, people were not murdered, rescue workers were not being shot at, etc. It will be interesting to see how things unfold this time since the dynamics of the city have been altered slightly.

So I am going on record as saying ...if you turn on your TV this weekend and see looting, shootings, and chaos - I BLAME NEW ORLEANS.

I'll probably call them tonight and see what they're planning to do. They'll want to stay, I bet - they're kind of stubborn.

A couple of things on the jingoistic Canada bashing:

Laura wrote:
Oh my fucking word. The woman can barely speak English.

You did know that Celine, who is a singer not a pundit, is French-Canadian right? And knowing that you would also know that English is not her primary language, correct? Perhaps you can speak French better that she can speak English?

Ace wrote:
God must like stupid Canadians, because he sure did make a lot of them, eh?

Well we all know that God loves the USofA. Check out the math literacy rankings from the US Government's Program for International Student Assessment. Note that those stupid Canadians are ranked 5th, while us USians are 24th. But of course your working definition of "stupid" is "doesn't agree with whatever the Repub administration of the USofA is doing", so yeah the world is just full of stupid people.

"Everyone is out of step but you George, everyone."

Yes, VonK, I knew that. It was a JOKE.

Loved the Celine meltdown. This is the perfect example of the liberal mindset:

"I'm not thinking with my head, I'm talking with my heart!"

I can never watch this moron again without thinking, "I barely can sing! I open dee television, deres peeple still dere. Take a Kay-yak and go into dos walls! Take a helicopsters and open dee roof! Dere dying down dere! We need to send dem da water!"

jingoistic Canada bashing:

Criminy, dude. Grow a f'in sense of humor.

We're evil. Evil people make bad jokes about other people. I'm sure we all love our Canadian brothers and sisters.

Dayum, nothing inflames a lib more than ethnic humor which does not make fun of Americans.

And this purported humor was funny in what way? What was the give away that calling Canadians stupid was funny?

Regarding Laura's reference to Celine's ESL problems, I'm perhaps overly sensitive since I overheard an American in FRANCE say in a highly exasperated manner to a clerk, "Don't you even speak English!" Perhaps she was just being funny.

"I barely can sing!"

From your lips to the ears of whatever pagan man-beast abomination you Canadians worship.

So, when you're sitting in a chair and you stand up, does the chair sometimes come with you a little bit?

You know, from all the puckering?

Nope. Do you have to get up to think because sitting constricts the flow of blood to your brain?

Hahaha, boy that's some humor uh?

Do you have to get up to think because sitting constricts the flow of blood to your brain?

Only when I'm doing math.

Well, math, as shown by the PISA study, is Haaard.

vK,

Hey, it's cool if you don't the joke. You're a moron, after all. It would be unseemly to make such demands on that soft sack of fluid sitting on your shoulders.

Oh I do joke, its just that I like my humor to be, you know, funny.

Uh, there's no point in explaining ethnic humor, VonK.

My grandfather was sicilian, his name was Vincenzo, and he was a mason.

The fact that when I needed some masonry done on my house recently, and all the masons were Sicilians named Vincent, made me chuckle.

And I know Canadian sheetrockers/ painters, and they have a better sense of humor than you do. And they are all the youngest of 18 children. How that is possible, I don't know. But there you go.

Betty was hot.

Mary Ann or Ginger?

Ethnic humor, by and large, is not funny as its intent is to put down the ethnic; Poles are stupid, the French smell, Americans are boors, Italians are mobsters, that sort of thing. Sorry, not funny.

The fact that you seem to think that laughing at ethnic jokes is a pre-req for having a sense of humor speaks to a quite limited sense of humor on your part.

Oh dear Lord, don't get all huffy.

When you get all huffy and proper I just want to pinch your cute little angry cheeks.

I don't think humor can be explained. It's funny or it's not.

For example, I don't get the appeal of Jon Stewart. He just doesn't seem all that funny to me.

Margaret Cho? Not funny.

Bill Cosby? Funny.

Denis Leary? Funny.

Ellen DeGeneres? Funny.

Larry the Cable Guy? Eh, not so much.

But I think we all can agree on the outstanding comedic talents of one Mr. Pauly Shore, the underappreciated genius of our time.

Gosh, von Kreedon, I assumed you were grousing about the referenced Onion article. I could see having a complaint about Cindy Sheehan humor (funny tho' I found it).

But you think making fun of someone who says something stupid in a funny accent is somehow beyond the pale? Accents are universally funny. Every single one of them is funny in the proper context. As a Southerner who divides time between New England and Olde England, I've taken well over my fair ration of shit re: accents and ethnicity. Am I complaining?

You'd have to have a heart of stone not to find "dee peeples dey are drrrrrrowning!" hysterical. C'mon, you've got a secret thing on for Celine, haven't you? Only explanation.

Weasel - Ok, stupid things being said in stupid accents can be hilarious in, as you say, the proper context. As I noted I admit to perhaps being overly sensitive to "Don't you even speak English" statements.

And yeah one of my many secret shames is liking Celine...sob.

Ah, SIR Pauly Shore the Great... Where are the "Pauly Shore's" of today? I guess we should just thank God that we had at least ONE Pauly Shore in our lifetime.

Laura - Oh, if I'd known that getting huffy and proper would get you to call my cheeks cute as you pinch them I'd have been all huffily proper more often.

rowr

Mary Ann

The Professor

And yeah one of my many secret shames is liking Celine...sob.

I smell flame war bait.

von Kreedon. That's a variant of the German name von Creedon, right? Which makes sense, because we all know the Germans are humorless, uptight, beer swilling & drunk jackboot-wearing bunker-humpers.

And that's damn funny, if you think about it.

World's funniest joke HERE

And there's cultural observations, including:

One intriguing result was that Germans -- not renowned for their sense of humour -- found just about everything funny and did not express a strong preference for any type of joke.

I just watched the Celine video again. The best part is Larry King trying to get her attention.

last post mine

Expanding on cultural humor

I think Von K has been nice enough to demonstrate what "Stuck on Stupid" looks like in a blog format. I'd like to take this time to thank Von for taking the trouble to educate us to this blog phenomenon. That was a lot of hard work, and we appreciate the effort.

*indignant*

That's NOT funny!

And no Canadians make jokes about Americans, right? Just for my information, have you ever watched "Royal Canadian Air Farce" or "This Hour has 22 Minutes"?

If not, do so and come back here with how mean we Americans are being. Canada should be glad the USA even notices them.

(BTW, my grandfather was Canadian, I have many Canadian relatives, and do like visiting the fair land south of Detroit.)

Boy, listening to vonCretin inform us what is and is not funny sure isn't funny. Well, actually, it's a bit funny, because when he waves his arms about, his tiny dick pokes out his open fly, which is pretty funny.

Regarding the ethnological ancestory of vonKreedon, check out post 1480-1482 from a 1999 Faux Election that involved Ace and myself.

I'm sure Canadians, and French, and Germans, and some of every fucking nation make fun of Americans, and French and Germans and Canadians...well, maybe not Canadians because really why bother. The point remains that ethnic humor tends to be more or less a game of one upsmanships, as in my intimation above that Canada is really so irrelevant as not to be worth the trouble of being made fun of.

Laura, amour, was that properly huffe enough to warrant another cheek pinching?

Got another ethnic joke for ya.

Did you know that one time, Frank Sinatra saved my life?
Yeah, five guys were kicking the Hell out of me in an alley, and Sinatra showed up and said, "That's enough."

The point remains that ethnic humor tends to be more or less a game of one upsmanships, as in my intimation above that Canada is really so irrelevant as not to be worth the trouble of being made fun of.

But come on, the anti-Canada stuff in the "South Park" movie was funny.

“Now now now, the Canadian Government has apologized for Bryan Adams on several
occasions.”

Slub - Dude, "Blame Canada" was a joke on US culture, not Canada. And yeah, South Park is hilarious. I guess I'm a "South Park Liberal".

Slub - Dude, "Blame Canada" was a joke on US culture, not Canada.

Well, yeah. And a damn funny one.

But those terrible Canadian accents they used in the movie? "It's aboot..."

Funny.

I'm a religious conservative who loves "South Park." I have no idea what that makes me - trying to get away with the title "South Park Christian" would get me into some trouble, I'm sure.

Of course, to really determine whether you have an acceptable sense of humor, you have to pass the official Ace of Spades Humor Litmus Test:

Question One
Do you find, or have you ever found, Margaret Cho to be funny?

A - YES
B - NO

Choose wisely.

Schlep, where in houston is your house? If it is south of the beltway...geeze.

yeah, my Mom had been calling all day freaking out and telling me to come to Mississippi. I wasn't, but now it is looking pretty bad, so I shall leave very very early in the morning. Right now it is taking about 8 hours to get through the city to the north of Conroe. No freakin way am I getting into that. (my hubby is conviently in La) So I have been spending the day dragging my heavy iron patio furniture around to the side of the house so it won't blow up against my windows. I am well north of the city, but still.... so was Hattisburg with Katrina and it got wiped.

Say a prayer for all of us here if you can!

RWS - Thinking and hoping all the best for you and yours. I guess as an agnostic I can pray for you without knowing if there is anything there listening, so I'll pray for you and yours as well [;-}

I laughed at Cho some years ago. Am I kicked out?

Sarah - I'd assume that you are fine as long as you were laughing AT Cho and not WITH her. Ace laughs at Cho all the time.

I guess as an agnostic I can pray for you without knowing if there is anything there listening

Actually, i believe this would make you a gnostic, not agnostic.

Really? I mean I can't engage in prayer from a state of not knowing, or in my case caring, if deity/deities exist? Sort of shouting into a dark room not knowing if anyone is present.

You can pray if you want, vonK. I was just pointing out that if you think God is unknowable agnostic would be an inaccurate description. Your beliefs actually would align *with* the Gnostics.

Brew - I don't believe that God is unknowable; I don't know if there is a God, or many Gods, or whatever, knowable or otherwise. Nor do I care anymore.

Ok, vonK. Too bad, really. I'm sure you would have been a fine Gnostic.

There is a God.

He is knowable.

And you should care.

But I appreciate any "shouting in a dark room" you can do for me. He's listening.

:-)

If that direction looks bad RWS, head this way.

I'd also be happy to take RWS into my home. I am sure many who've seen her picture would be as well 8-) !! Pittsburgh might be a bit out of the way though.

Well I'm a Houstonian who just moved away last month, so I'm missing out on all this crazy weather. I expect Houston and the people there to handle this situation well. The biggest danger will probably be tornadoes. I think with as dry as it's been and the storm drainage improvements made since Allison that flooding won't be that bad. As for Galveston, though, I'm worried.

Here's to hoping it hits further west...

That is very sweet Dave and doc. But I am going to my mom's in Mississippi. I could go to a SIL or bestfriends in Dallas, but going north from now until Sat will be INSANE. I'm heading east. I might as well take the extra days and see my family since I won't be able to for Thanksgiving and Christmas for various reasons.

Right now Rita is a cat 5..165mph winds. This aint looking good.

I've got an ethnic joke to beat all:

A Jew, a Mick, a Spic, a Dago, and a Frog all go into a Chink restaurant. They sit down, order some moo goo gai pan and egg rolls, and all come to the agreement that Von Kreedon is a tight-assed bore to the nth degree.

Note to Rightwingsparkle: you'd better drag that furniture into your house, or at least your garage (if you have one; don't most people these days?). Hurricane-force winds can lift SUVs like feather pillows; they would have no trouble tossing your patio furniture into some unfortunate person's window.

Andrea,

My hubby is out of town and there is no way I could get that heavy furniture into the garage, even with my daughter's help. I put it in the small space between the side of the house with no windows and against the 8 foot wood fence. I have them wedged togetherm hoping that the fence, the house and the heaviness of the furnture together will keep it in place. It's the best I can do.

Its already a cat5.
If it gets much stronger before landfall, won't matter if the chairs are outside or inside.

Godspeed RWS, stay safe.

I laughed at Cho some years ago.

Its easy to laugh at Cho, I do it all the time. Kind of like shooting fish in a barrel.

Her "jokes" are quite another thing though...

I've never laughed at Cho either, but now that she's lost the weight, maybe she could get casted in the ALL-ANAL ASIAN TEEN GANGBANG CUM SLUTS sequel. Chris Rock's adage about girls who get abortions comes to mind.

Rightwingsparkle: bummer. Sometimes it sucks being a girl. (Sometimes I must admit having a man around the house can be useful, though sadly my taste is in spaghetti-armed weakling academic types.)

Then again, if the winds hit your area at the strength they are now, it won't matter what gets tossed around. I hope that doesn't happen! Good luck with everything!

Lines of cars heading through my hometown now... I'm an hour N of Austin.

As a Canadian I resent this: “God must like stupid Canadians, because he sure did make a lot of them, eh?”
The proper way to write this is: “God must like stupid Canadians, because he sure did make a lot of them, eh™?”

Thanks. As you were.

Unlike the Brits, at least Canadians are smart enough to call a flashlight a flashlight.

Guy asked me for a torch to help him fix a flat, and I wondered if he was looking to torch it for the insurance money or change a tire.

Ask me for a "torch" and I start thinking oxy/acetylene and a "rousing" night of setting dumpsters on fire.

There wasn't gas to be had at any gas station around here that I passed and I well north of Houston in the suburbs. WOW. Luckily I filled up the other day AND I got cash.

I am smart that way.

I will be loading up the kids and dog and hitting the road at 4am. There better not be the traffic jam there is now.

If any of you see me on this damn internet after 9pm, YELL AT ME!

RWS: Can't you find a neighbor to help you move that furniture? If there is any wiggle room I don't think it's going to stay.

Hell sparkle, they were 5 cars deep at SAM'S yesterday, and we're 200 miles away.

We have refugees! Brother in law, wife, two of their kids, a daughter-in-law-in-law, two grandkids and 3 dogs.

I'm getting weird browser errors on this page

How did I miss this opportunity to take a shot at the losers in Canadia?
Yea, I think they suck.

p.s. fuck you, vonKreedon.