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| Arafat: Stable, But Pining for the Fjords? »
November 04, 2004
Schwarzenegger: Democrats are "Losers"Kinda funny, but also kinda cocky. Pride goes before a fall. Leave the "loser"/"douchebag" stuff to people like me, Arnold. You're a governor. Governate with some decorum. Respectability quota filled; on to the fun stuff. Schwarzenegger Calls Democrats 'Losers' The best part of that is the "Let's be honest." That's the genius. Anyone can insult someone, but to then add in a "Let's be honest," as if you expect your opponent to agree with the insult because it's so obvious... that's what pushes it over the top. Nancy Pelosi? You're an idiot. I mean-- let's be honest. There's no point maintaining this charade of your non-idiocy. It's the elephant in the room we've finally got to talk about. Michael Moore? You smell like a wet camel. Let's be honest. We've got to get you to one of those industrial-sized circus showers and hose you down like the big sweaty filthbeast you are. Oh, and you're not funny. You're snide. Snide can be funny, but it isn't necessarily funny. You're the non-funny, non-talented sort of snide. I mean-- let's be honest. You didn't really think people were actually laughing at your little nickle-and-dime home movies, did you? They're forcing laughs, to show they agree with your warmed-over New Socialist cant. Let's be honest: You're the leftist equivalent of Up With People. Ventriloquists look down on you. Let's be honest.
Seriously: think about it. Haven't you noticed this long-running game of phone-tag is entirely a one-sided affair? If I wanted to talk to you, don't you think I'd make the effort to call you up once in a while, just to see how you're doing? Oh, I hear your messages, all right. You know what I do during your messages? I'm not writing down your phone number and extension, as you so frequently urge me. I'm giggling. Let's be honest: I laugh at your silly talk of "last warnings." You've got as many "last warnings" as the French. I'm sorry, Student Loan Guy, but this relationship isn't working, and it's time we faced up to that. Let's be honest. This is a we're-going-to-have-to-agree-to-disagree type thing. Two words you're going to have to come to terms with: write off. By the way, you sound kinda gay on the phone. Let's be honest. You might want to work on that. When you call up I don't know whether I'm dodging creditors or being invited to a select screening of Manhunt. And, frankly, I'm tired of getting my hopes up every time you call. posted by Ace at 07:45 PM
CommentsBest. Damn. Blog. Ever. Problem is, every time I visit, I either blow soda out my nose or crap my pants. Kudos. Keep it up. Posted by: Jason on November 4, 2004 08:00 PM
In the South, you can say anything about anyone as long as you say, "bless their heart!" Posted by: Joan of Argghh! on November 4, 2004 08:06 PM
Jason, Thanks. I enjoyed that. I think writing jokes is like writing songs-- the best ones just write themselves, with no effort. It's the ones you sweat and really work on that turn out to be not-so-good. Kind of a sucky thing, but it seems to be the rule. Posted by: ace on November 4, 2004 08:17 PM
Jason, let's be honest. Ace doesn't need any more of any ego boost. Posted by: The Black Republican on November 4, 2004 08:31 PM
TBR, Let's be honest: You're harshing my ego-buzz. Posted by: ace on November 4, 2004 08:32 PM
Arafat is starting to smell like rotten fish. Lets be honest. ;) I dont want to add to your oversized ego Ace, but I have to say that I cant drink anything when I read your blog. My computer would of been covered with soda, coffee, tea, and whiskey by now. Posted by: DanTanna on November 4, 2004 08:42 PM
Speaking of Arafat, did you see the headline at Drudge? It seems Arafat never told his wife or anyone in the PLO where the billions he's hidden actually are. Hahahahaha! He's the douche that keeps on giving! Posted by: Brock on November 4, 2004 08:54 PM
TBR wins the thread. Posted by: Joe R. the Unabrewer on November 4, 2004 09:11 PM
Ego or not... This was one of the funniest posts I've ever read. Posted by: jmflynny on November 4, 2004 09:15 PM
That was all about your student loans, wasn't it? I mean it started out as commentary on Arnold's "let's be honest" but worked slowly to the surface like that really deep zit that you have not work at for a while. I'm mean, let's be honest. BTW, I had my Student Loans placed in default for 6 years as my military deferments were systematically ignored every 6 months. You'll survive. Posted by: Dear Johns on November 4, 2004 11:50 PM
Ace-- What, you're dating Sallie Mae too? She's always calling me, complaining to me that I never write, that I never spend any money on her. And here she was, cheating on me with you. What a bitch. Cheers, Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge on November 5, 2004 12:07 AM
BTW, I had my Student Loans placed in default for 6 years as my military deferments were systematically ignored every 6 months. You'll survive. Until the loan agency decides enough is enough and garnishes 15% of your future earnings for 10 years or so. Happened to my brother, poor sap. Posted by: cheshirecat on November 5, 2004 12:37 AM
To clarify, "had my Student Loans placed in" and out of "default" and back in and out again repeatedly "for 6 years...". My credit was a disaster after this little "benefit" of active duty service. My point, though, was it will pass. For a garnishment to occur, cheshirecat, you're brother must have owned one bitch-load of coin. I mean, post-graduate at god school type shit. The whole point of loan guarantees is the lender is offered a certain measure of recompense. Posted by: Dear Johns on November 5, 2004 05:08 AM
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