Ace of Spades HQ

Amazon.com Widgets

Now Available!
The Deplorable Gourmet
A Horde-sourced Cookbook
[All profits go to charity]

Top Headlines

Holiday Break: I've had a rough couple of weeks -- the shoulder is healing now and I'm finally getting decent sleep -- and I've decided to take a long weekend.
I'm taking Friday off, and then Monday off, too.
I have Open Threads for both days and I will post if big news breaks, but if it doesn't -- and it probably won't, news is slow before a holiday weekend -- I'm going to take a four day weekend.

Sh0eOnHead discusses the Psychotic Cult of Lindsay
Real quotes:
"This case has me feeling like I'm on Law & Order with you guys!"
"We literally binge true crime as a hobby, we've been trained for this moment"
Worth the watch. If you haven't seen the genuinely upsetting insanity motivating thousands of women, you should watch this just to see how society is crumbling.
Ban TikTok, Trump. I don't care if Barron tells you it's popular with the yutes. It is an evil Communist China op and it is driving women insane.

Dolly Parton tells the story of the supposedly real-life Jolene
As Andrew Branca says, can we see this Jolene, finally? Who was this hottie that was a genuine sexual threat to Dolly Parton?
I think this is Fake News personally. When a magician claims he learned a trick from a Himalayan wise man, I don't believe him either.

TJM definitively ranks the films of Mel Brooks

Peter Cullen, voice actor for Optimus Prime (among many others) dies at home surrounded by family at age 85
RIP and Roll Out!

TJM discusses the career of Mel Brooks and why High Anxiety just isn't as good as Young Frankentsein

Podcast: Dolly Parton...an American classic, Michigan's El Sayed is part of our future destruction, More Global Warming nonsense, mail-in balloting restrictions, Darline Graham? Get rid of family dynasties...and more!

Breaking news: Dolly Parton had a real pair of 38s
Or at least one. She carried it everywhere for protection.
This joke brought to you by Benny Hill. And speaking of the British: The Buckingham Palace guard tributed her yesterday

Dolly Parton is badgered into saying something negative about Trump's bus-board locker-room talk, but refuses to bow to the media pressure, telling the twink agitator she learned long ago to "keep your damned mouth shut"
What I'm appreciating is that while her surface is soft and sweet, she's got some actual steel a centimeter underneath.

1977 interview shows that Barbara Walters has always been a seaward and Dolly Parton always had "country class"
Walters actually asks Dolly Parton if she knows that people think she's a joke. This because Walters can't get over the fact that a show-woman has 1, big breasts, and 2, dresses a bit outrageously because, get this, she's an entertainer. A stage performer. You know, someone people pay money to see live and expect them to put on a show.
She never would attack Liberace for wearing glitter-tuxedos. But she's mad that Dolly Parton makes Barbara Walters look bad through association (by being a woman). Babs, you wish people associated the two of you. Believe me, we can tell the difference.

Tim Curry, actor, butler, evil space clown and gay space vampire, and judge on American Duos, dies at age 80 after poor health due to a stroke in 2012

Dolly Parton: Stairway To Heaven
[CBD]

Dolly Parton Dies at 80
[CBD]

TJM talks about the films of Ralph Bakshi, director of the animated The Lord of the Rings and ranks them definitively

Candace Owens joins the Scooby Gang

An Inappropriate Use of the Song "Holiday Road"
Another inappropriate use

Tuq'r Qarlson: "I never mention Ben Shapiro because I don't think about him." Status: FALSE.

This Senator Fought Wildfires From Planes. Now He's Fighting Activists and Bureaucrats "senator tim sheehy on the 'unholy alliance' of environmental rules and activism that's preventing firefighters from doing their jobs..." [Hat Tip: Pete Bog] [CBD]

Dude trolls a city council meeting about permitting yet another mosque by promising the mosque will destroy the Constitution
"All women who are overweight or obese will have to wear burka. 10,000 steps per day, low carb."

Podcast: Will Cuba fall without a fight? More Iran confusion, gun rights for felons isn't a crazy idea, wetbacks are voting! And are data centers of the devil? Nope!

Recent Comments

Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ : "Powerplant: 2 × Rolls Royce BR700-710 C4-11 t ..."

Anna Puma: "Oh now Talifreako is quoting some Islamic mystic.. ..."

Ace-Endorsed Author A.H. Lloyd: "You mean the Warhammer cat-girls no longer have a ..."

Diogenes: "With all the crazy shit happening, buy more weapon ..."

Ace-Endorsed Author A.H. Lloyd: "Oh yeah, we'll give up our weapons. Dumbasses ..."

Anna Puma: "You mean the Warhammer cat-girls no longer have a ..."

runner: "Maria looks like Sophia Loren, especially when she ..."

four seasons: " With all the crazy shit happening, buy more we ..."

Anna Puma: "They offer the 'loving' embrace of the police stat ..."

Ace-Endorsed Author A.H. Lloyd: "I have two A-37B kits in stash. We sold them to co ..."

Diogenes: "...is long and distinguished. Posted by: Diogenes ..."

four seasons: " Oh yeah, we'll give up our weapons. Dumbas ..."

Bloggers in Arms

Some Humorous Asides

Kaboom!

Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You

You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss
Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president.

A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta

Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me

Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn
Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty.

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon

A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates

Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree

Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility

The Dowd-O-Matic!

The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)


Advertise Here! Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Contact Ace: aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com Buck: buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com CBD: cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com joe mannix: mannix2024 at proton.me MisHum: petmorons at gee mail.com J.J. Sefton: sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com Recent Entries Thursday Overnight Open Thread - September 3, 2026 Mini-Vacation Cafe How Is This Even a Question? Texas Establishment RINOs Debate Whether They Will Support Ken Paxton Over James "Jesus Has Six Gender" Talarico Tuq'r's Correlegionist Abdulrahman Mohamed El-Sayed Struggles, For Some Reason, to Win Over Jewish Voters; Michigan's Jewish Demcrat AG Says Jews Must Put Aside Worries About Antisemitic Violence to Support Muslims Who Want to Kill Them Lindsay Clancy Trial: 11 to One In Favor of ... Full Acquittal, With a Single Juror Hanging on For a Conviction? Harvard/Harris Schmoll: Republicans Take the Lead in the Midterms with Likely Voters, +2% As Predicted: Tuq'r Qarlson Essentially Endorses Abdulrahman Mohamed El-Sayed By Saying He Wouldn't Vote for His Opponent Mike Rogers "Even At Gunpoint" Because He's a "Tool of Israel" DHS: An Ignored 1996 Clinton-Era Law Says That States Have to Report the Number of Illegals Receiving Federal Benefits Like SNAP. We're Going to Start Enforcing It Now. The Thursday Morning Rant The Morning Report — 9/ 3 /26 Absent Friends Captain Whitebread 2026 Jon Ekdahl 2026 Jay Guevara 2025 Jim Sunk New Dawn 2025 Jewells45 2025 Bandersnatch 2024 GnuBreed 2024 Captain Hate 2023 moon_over_vermont 2023 westminsterdogshow 2023 Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022 Dave In Texas 2022 Jesse in D.C. 2022 OregonMuse 2022 redc1c4 2021 Tami 2021 Chavez the Hugo 2020 Ibguy 2020 Rickl 2019 Joffen 2014 AoSHQ Writers Group A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info: maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security Cutting The Cord [Joe Mannix (not a cop)] Cutting The Cord: It's Easier Than You Think [Blaster] Private Email and Secure Signatures [Hogmartin] Moron Meet-Ups Texas MoMe 2026: 10/16/2026-10/17/2026 Corsicana,TX Contact Ben Had for info	« WaPo Liberal Columnist Changes His Mind on the SwiftVets \| Main \| Chicago Tribune: Lower Rents Could Hurt Poor » September 27, 2004 John Elway, Republican MVP Introduces Bush in Colorado as a man who "knows how to make the right calls when the pressure is on." It's just too sweet. Update! Daisy Cutter points out that this would be the perfect time to plug Football Fans For Truth. Yeah, I remember the first time someone threw a football to me, too. I was seven, and too I flinched from it like it was a french kiss from Ron Jeremy. In the ensuing years, I've learned to keep my eyes open. That goes for both football and Ron Jeremy soul-kisses. More embarassing photos at Football Fans For Truth. By the way: If that picture doesn't show, as it didn't for me, click on it and hit Show Picture. posted by Ace at 12:50 PM Comments You're not kidding. And ... when you compare the gruesome photos at http://footballfansfortruth.us, it really hits home. Posted by: Daisy on September 27, 2004 01:14 PM As pointed out by Jonah Goldberg, Kerry has trouble faking an “unscheduled” campaign stop in Wisconsin: http://news.search.yahoo.com/news/search?p=kerry+beer&ei=UTF-8&fl=0&c=news_photos He takes three “sips” and makes one toast (after which he presumably takes another “sip”), yet the only change in the beer is the head goes away. It’s not so much that I object to him being a poseur, but that he is such a bad one. He reeks of inauthenticity. These sort of inattention-to-detail issues keep cropping up because he is constantly trying to pretend he is not a rich snob. It’s sort of the opposite of Eliza Doolittle: he has to be coached in the little things to make him appear normal. Apparently, his handlers screwed up. Next time: “Remember LAMBEAU Field, order a BEER and DRINK it”. I bet he’s a bad poker player, too. Posted by: David on September 27, 2004 01:52 PM That's not really fair, David - George Bush is a lousy poker player too. He keeps trying to convince al Qaeda that he's bluffing, but they keep folding (their tents) before he can show them the flush. Posted by: The Black Republican on September 27, 2004 05:21 PM Sounds good, but this could play very badly in Ohio. I hear that the name Elway inspires homicidal rage in Cleveland to this very day. Posted by: Just a man on September 28, 2004 01:41 AM then again, what republican doesn't? Kerry will probably win there with his much-un- deserved black vote anyway. Posted by: just a man on September 28, 2004 03:10 AM poker me up Posted by: poker me up on December 30, 2004 04:24 PM Magna laude... Posted by: penis on April 12, 2005 08:04 AM Post a comment Name: Email Address: URL: Comments: Remember info?	Now Available! The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines Holiday Break: I've had a rough couple of weeks -- the shoulder is healing now and I'm finally getting decent sleep -- and I've decided to take a long weekend. I'm taking Friday off, and then Monday off, too. I have Open Threads for both days and I will post if big news breaks, but if it doesn't -- and it probably won't, news is slow before a holiday weekend -- I'm going to take a four day weekend. Sh0eOnHead discusses the Psychotic Cult of Lindsay Real quotes: "This case has me feeling like I'm on Law & Order with you guys!" "We literally binge true crime as a hobby, we've been trained for this moment" Worth the watch. If you haven't seen the genuinely upsetting insanity motivating thousands of women, you should watch this just to see how society is crumbling. Ban TikTok, Trump. I don't care if Barron tells you it's popular with the yutes. It is an evil Communist China op and it is driving women insane. Dolly Parton tells the story of the supposedly real-life Jolene As Andrew Branca says, can we see this Jolene, finally? Who was this hottie that was a genuine sexual threat to Dolly Parton? I think this is Fake News personally. When a magician claims he learned a trick from a Himalayan wise man, I don't believe him either. TJM definitively ranks the films of Mel Brooks Peter Cullen, voice actor for Optimus Prime (among many others) dies at home surrounded by family at age 85 RIP and Roll Out! TJM discusses the career of Mel Brooks and why High Anxiety just isn't as good as Young Frankentsein Podcast: Dolly Parton...an American classic, Michigan's El Sayed is part of our future destruction, More Global Warming nonsense, mail-in balloting restrictions, Darline Graham? Get rid of family dynasties...and more! Breaking news: Dolly Parton had a real pair of 38s Or at least one. She carried it everywhere for protection. This joke brought to you by Benny Hill. And speaking of the British: The Buckingham Palace guard tributed her yesterday Dolly Parton is badgered into saying something negative about Trump's bus-board locker-room talk, but refuses to bow to the media pressure, telling the twink agitator she learned long ago to "keep your damned mouth shut" What I'm appreciating is that while her surface is soft and sweet, she's got some actual steel a centimeter underneath. 1977 interview shows that Barbara Walters has always been a seaward and Dolly Parton always had "country class" Walters actually asks Dolly Parton if she knows that people think she's a joke. This because Walters can't get over the fact that a show-woman has 1, big breasts, and 2, dresses a bit outrageously because, get this, she's an entertainer. A stage performer. You know, someone people pay money to see live and expect them to put on a show. She never would attack Liberace for wearing glitter-tuxedos. But she's mad that Dolly Parton makes Barbara Walters look bad through association (by being a woman). Babs, you wish people associated the two of you. Believe me, we can tell the difference. Tim Curry, actor, butler, evil space clown and gay space vampire, and judge on American Duos, dies at age 80 after poor health due to a stroke in 2012 Dolly Parton: Stairway To Heaven [CBD] Dolly Parton Dies at 80 [CBD] TJM talks about the films of Ralph Bakshi, director of the animated The Lord of the Rings and ranks them definitively Candace Owens joins the Scooby Gang An Inappropriate Use of the Song "Holiday Road" Another inappropriate use Tuq'r Qarlson: "I never mention Ben Shapiro because I don't think about him." Status: FALSE. This Senator Fought Wildfires From Planes. Now He's Fighting Activists and Bureaucrats "senator tim sheehy on the 'unholy alliance' of environmental rules and activism that's preventing firefighters from doing their jobs..." [Hat Tip: Pete Bog] [CBD] Dude trolls a city council meeting about permitting yet another mosque by promising the mosque will destroy the Constitution "All women who are overweight or obese will have to wear burka. 10,000 steps per day, low carb." Podcast: Will Cuba fall without a fight? More Iran confusion, gun rights for felons isn't a crazy idea, wetbacks are voting! And are data centers of the devil? Nope! Recent Comments Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ : "Powerplant: 2 × Rolls Royce BR700-710 C4-11 t ..." Anna Puma: "Oh now Talifreako is quoting some Islamic mystic.. ..." Ace-Endorsed Author A.H. Lloyd: "You mean the Warhammer cat-girls no longer have a ..." Diogenes: "With all the crazy shit happening, buy more weapon ..." Ace-Endorsed Author A.H. Lloyd: "Oh yeah, we'll give up our weapons. Dumbasses ..." Anna Puma: "You mean the Warhammer cat-girls no longer have a ..." runner: "Maria looks like Sophia Loren, especially when she ..." four seasons: " With all the crazy shit happening, buy more we ..." Anna Puma: "They offer the 'loving' embrace of the police stat ..." Ace-Endorsed Author A.H. Lloyd: "I have two A-37B kits in stash. We sold them to co ..." Diogenes: "...is long and distinguished. Posted by: Diogenes ..." four seasons: " Oh yeah, we'll give up our weapons. Dumbas ..." Bloggers in Arms RI Red's Blog! Behind The Black CutJibNewsletter The Pipeline Second City Cop Talk Of The Town with Steve Noxon Belmont Club Chicago Boyz Cold Fury Da Goddess Daily Pundit Dawn Eden Day by Day (Cartoon) EduWonk Enter Stage Right The Epoch Times Grim's Hall Victor Davis Hanson Hugh Hewitt IMAO Instapundit JihadWatch Kausfiles Lileks/The Bleat Memeorandum (Metablog) Outside the Beltway Patterico's Pontifications The People's Cube Powerline RedState Reliapundit Viking Pundit WizBang Some Humorous Asides Kaboom! Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives September 2026 August 2026 July 2026 June 2026 May 2026 April 2026 March 2026 February 2026 January 2026 December 2025 November 2025 October 2025 September 2025 August 2025 July 2025 June 2025 May 2025 April 2025 March 2025 February 2025 January 2025 December 2024 November 2024 October 2024 September 2024 August 2024 July 2024 June 2024 May 2024 April 2024 March 2024 February 2024 January 2024 December 2023 November 2023 October 2023 September 2023 August 2023 July 2023 June 2023 May 2023 April 2023 March 2023 February 2023 January 2023 December 2022 November 2022 October 2022 September 2022 August 2022 July 2022 June 2022 May 2022 April 2022 March 2022 February 2022 January 2022 December 2021 November 2021 October 2021 September 2021 August 2021 July 2021 June 2021 May 2021 April 2021 March 2021 February 2021 January 2021 December 2020 November 2020 October 2020 September 2020 August 2020 July 2020 June 2020 May 2020 April 2020 March 2020 February 2020 January 2020 December 2019 November 2019 October 2019 September 2019 August 2019 July 2019 June 2019 May 2019 April 2019 March 2019 February 2019 January 2019 December 2018 November 2018 October 2018 September 2018 August 2018 July 2018 June 2018 May 2018 April 2018 March 2018 February 2018 January 2018 December 2017 November 2017 October 2017 September 2017 August 2017 July 2017 June 2017 May 2017 April 2017 March 2017 February 2017 January 2017 December 2016 November 2016 October 2016 September 2016 August 2016 July 2016 June 2016 May 2016 April 2016 March 2016 February 2016 January 2016 December 2015 November 2015 October 2015 September 2015 August 2015 July 2015 June 2015 May 2015 April 2015 March 2015 February 2015 January 2015 December 2014 November 2014 October 2014 September 2014 August 2014 July 2014 June 2014 May 2014 April 2014 March 2014 February 2014 January 2014 December 2013 November 2013 October 2013 September 2013 August 2013 July 2013 June 2013 May 2013 April 2013 March 2013 February 2013 January 2013 December 2012 November 2012 October 2012 September 2012 August 2012 July 2012 June 2012 May 2012 April 2012 March 2012 February 2012 January 2012 December 2011 November 2011 October 2011 September 2011 August 2011 July 2011 June 2011 May 2011 April 2011 March 2011 February 2011 January 2011 December 2010 November 2010 October 2010 September 2010 August 2010 July 2010 June 2010 May 2010 April 2010 March 2010 February 2010 January 2010 December 2009 November 2009 October 2009 September 2009 August 2009 July 2009 June 2009 May 2009 April 2009 March 2009 February 2009 January 2009 December 2008 November 2008 October 2008 September 2008 August 2008 July 2008 June 2008 May 2008 April 2008 March 2008 February 2008 January 2008 December 2007 November 2007 October 2007 September 2007 August 2007 July 2007 June 2007 May 2007 April 2007 March 2007 February 2007 January 2007 December 2006 November 2006 October 2006 September 2006 August 2006 July 2006 June 2006 May 2006 April 2006 March 2006 February 2006 January 2006 December 2005 November 2005 October 2005 September 2005 August 2005 July 2005 June 2005 May 2005 April 2005 March 2005 February 2005 January 2005 December 2004 November 2004 October 2004 September 2004 August 2004 July 2004 June 2004 May 2004 April 2004 December 0000 Syndicate this site (XML) Powered by Movable Type 2.64

John Elway, Republican MVP