I never read the original when you first posted the link. If I had seen the title "Modern Day Modest Proposal," the connection to Swift would have been immediately apparent. But the mere fact of allusion does not necessarily mean the humor will be successful.

I find it mildly and pleasantly confusing to be sent via Mr. Whoopy's Wayback Machine to posts that I thought would never be equalled, only to find that even though they've been subsequently equalled, I still laugh my ass off when I read them.

Thanks for the mammaries.

M. Anderon, her Ladyship, that Doffer of the Literal/ Lady of Girth oft, and too oft misguessed for David Letterman/ Your Sight-Gags--retractable Dicky, o'rsized Hat and horse Pill--/ Lady o' the Lounge, oh ever-Sampler of the Veal.../ M. Anderton, where your Gambols now?/ That girthy Merriment which was to set the Water Cooler on a Roar--/ The refreshment Nook where you became a Woman, in the reach of a Co-worker--a Penis: and there a Woman no more, a Womanist!/ M. Anderton, sad Ironist, opera Clown, bow out./ You are hilarious/ The Day, with the Laughter, is yours.

As with Alanis Morrisette, someone needs to be taught the definition of the word irony. In the case of Alanis, she should have substituted the term "coincidence," and with Anderon I believe the term would be "unfunny."

Whoops! Dropped a "t."

Patton,

Thanks, that's very nice to hear.

Emma,

Well, in fairness, she's as funny as Oliver Willis.

I'm going to go watch the Men's Olympic Gymnastics finals now. Later this year, I'll be voting for John Kerry. To celebrate those events, I'm giving up beer.

Wow this sarcasm stuff is fun and funny!

Jesus, that poem sucks. Who are these people?

Just a clarification here: she used the word jackass first. I just reminded her that the jackass was the symbol for people like her (i.e. Democrats). But I did tell her to FOAD. Does that make me a bad person?

Maybe we're all being too subtle. Maybe we should have fisked her with editor-approved phrases like "Is this funny?" and "I just don't get this."

I've got a working theory that dicates that the irony-challenged also have a hard time with sarcasm. Thus, I'm pretty sure Paul's truly superb "When they came for the Cryonically-Suspended Incubator Women, I said nothing because I'm not a Cryonically-Suspended Incubator Woman," etc. was entirely lost on our angry satirist.

I just got a letter from Johnny Coldcuts! I'll skip all the embarassing stuff about being named President of his Fan Club (Greater Northern Virginia Chapter), to get to the relevant part.

I quote:

"Yeah...I've seen that uptight bitch's post. Irony like Swift, huh? The only thing Swift about her letter was the rate at which chunks blew out my ass after reading that drivel. Who needs high colonics when you have anal injections like this wandering shred of syphilitic-induced-delirium seated at her typewriter? I gotta tell ya, Senator, I used to think your writing sucked major donkey balls. But hell, after reading "The Author's" pretentious piece of pseudo-intellectual pablum, I have come to two conclusions:

1) Your blog still sucks donkey balls;
2) But as much as you suck, you don't SWALLOW. Know what I mean? I mean "The Author" swallows like Oliver Willis at a Filet-o-Fish buffet with free Kool-Aid refills.

Your pal,

Johnny Coldcuts"

Oh Senator.

You make me laugh. Too bad about your blog. But funny funny post.

You do Johnny as good as Ace.

Lauraw,

Thanks! Now you know why I am President of the JC fan club. I just consider his critique to be constructive criticism. No more, no less.

Wow, there really isn't much left of her for me to take on, is there?

One thing I'd like to point out to her, the beauty of Swift is that he feigned support for the satirical proposition he made. It's like the comedian delivering a ridiculous line with a straight face. By forcing people to react with revulsion to his own position, he forces them to think about the point he really wants to make. But by accusing her opponents of the extreme position, she makes herself sound like a loon. Maybe if she had added a comment like "Brilliant! Why didn't I think of that?" She would have been truly ironic.

The way Ace's and Way Off Bass' first posts were.

Of course, I didn't really need to tell any of you this, did I?

Johnny boy, I gotta agree. And not only that, but she's a total two bagger, let me tell ya. I mean, I'll hit pretty much anything but The Author grosses me out like Steven Tyler wearing a bright red teddy. Now I've gotta take a trip downtown just to get the image out of my mind. See you guys later.

The Author grosses me out like Steven Tyler wearing a bright red teddy.

Thanks. I'll never feel clean again.

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