I am sure your female readers can clue us in on what exactly made Howard the Duck so damn sexy.

As for me, Jessica Rabbit. Mmmmm...

is this one of those trick questions?

The babes love me because I wear long shorts... if you know what I mean!

Well, dat do explain why I always wears my suit when I goes shopping at the wal-mart. Iffen I's gonna be impotent.....

You say mute as if it is a bad thing.

Howard the Duck was sexy?

Mmmmmmmmm... Star Blazers!

That show RULED!

Your weekend's vacation seems to have rotted your brain, Ace...

here's a tough choice...

Daphne (hot, but stuck-up)

or

Velma (not-so-hot, but very possibly lesbian)

Hmmmmmmm.........

Velma all the way - Daphne is probably a lazy lay. She'd just lay there and expect you to be thanking your lucky stars. Velma would put her back in to it.

I got my undergrad degree in Pullman (class of 2003), and there was no impotence problem that I could see. There were, however, some astronomically high STD rates.

"...there was no impotence problem that I could see"

What was your sample size?

First they drive out the small businesses and then they make us impotent. Is there no end to their devious evil? I say as punishment for this final insult, Walmart should be required to provide us with hot babes until we are demonstrably fully recovered. It might take several babes. I'll take two before bedtime and check in tomorrow morning if I need more.

Wallmart gave me some serious oak last time I was there.

There was always something about Bugs Bunny in drag.....oh, shit. Did I say that out load?

You said "load". Heh heh heh.

It can certainly make you impatient. Nothing like waiting 2 hours for the conga line of 400 pound inbreds to shuffle past the one cash register out of 30 that they actually keep open nowadays.

Why SSS, how very enlightened.

steve,

Touche, dude. But I based that comment mostly off stories from my (nine) roommates, as I was a giant nerd.

But seriously, worrying about impotence in Pullman is like worrying about a drought when the rivers are overflowing.
And it breaks my heart that the liberal morons have taken over that town.

What? Louisiana is a fat-ass state, and the local white trash are no exception.

almost as big as a crush as I had on the Zsa Zsa Gabor mouse from The Rescuers

Ah.... Bianca!

*blush*

Since Wally World seems to be bending over backwards to accomodate all the naysayers at their new locations, we can expect the new Pullman store to be handing out v*agra, c*alis and l*vitra at the door.

What? Louisiana is a fat-ass state, and the local white trash are no exception.

I always appreciate it when a Lefty is willing to go on the record with his disdain for his fellow man. They typically like to hide their pretentious, narcissistic elitism behind a facade of concern for all men. But, we all know - and sometimes they slip and allude to the fact - they have a general disdain for anyone who doesn't meet their criteria for being enlightened. You know, if you are a white male without a college degree you are "trailer trash". If you are a white, college-educated male without a journalism, philosophy, or poli-sci major - you are simply a Rethuglican and/or neo-con.

I am sure that StarShapedScar is a better man than most - just ask him.

Having rarely shopped at Wal-mart, I can't comment on impotence within the store. However, it is clear that no thug posting on this thread has ever been within miles of a Wal-Mart.

Also, I'm glad I didn't read this mess of a thread last night. Nightmares and all.

This story just smacks of the entire "Islamic men hate the United States because we can make their penises fall off with a technology we call "pop music"" story.

Oh... and for the record? Velma all the way. I've always had a thing for nerd girls. They're cute, smart, and generally a wildcat in bed.

This story just smacks of the entire "Islamic men hate the United States because we can make their penises fall off with a technology we call "pop music"" story.

Oh... and for the record? Velma all the way. I've always had a thing for nerd girls. They're cute, smart, and generally a wildcat in bed.

Um, okay. Why did the server post my comment twice?

The lighting makes you limp because you get a good look at just how unattractive your fellow shoppers are. How the cellulite is visible through stretch pants, or how the slice above the belt needs a date with a razor. That'll take the starch out of anybody but a teenager.

You guys never had to spend any time with Velma. Hey, if you can put up with the tedium and the man-bashing, give it hell. I had to be restrained from cold-cocking her after 20 minutes in the Mystery Machine.

Nothing a little powdered rhino horn can't fix

Do I have to choose between Daphne and Velma? 'Cause to be honest, the only right answer there is "Both. At the same time." That way everyone will be satisfied.

> Ah.... Bianca!

I'd managed to put her behind me, until you yahoos came along to open up the wounds.

More idiotic blabbering from the wackos including a WASHINGTON STATE moron who nose tries to compare impotence of deer to what could happen to people if a WAL-MART is built frankly that egghead should stick his nose in a pencil sharpener

The average Wal-Mart supercenter has 230 security cameras.

Anyone who wants to test this "impotence" theory should keep this in mind. Best to wait until you've left the store.

Thats just friggin great. We just opened up our new show room right across the street from a Wal-Mart. Now in addition to being in debt up to my nut sack I get to worry about impotence. And I just bought a babe magnet too (aka a Golden Retriever puppy).

I blame Bush.

A puppy?!!

*squeal!*

See what I mean. And now I shooting blanks.

"local white trash" - scaredface

Scar,

You must be Episcopalian.

So help me out, Mr. Social Register.

If there's white trash, then there's also white non-trash, right? (Such as your self-anointed preening self.) How do you tell them apart? (Or in other words, please give us the parameters of your snobbery.)

Is there also 'asian trash', 'hispanic trash' or 'black trash'? How do you tell the 'trash' in these groups from the non-trash? Or do you just consider 100% of those groups to be trash?

Final question: Why not stop being a snob and treat and talk about all people as being your equal, i.e. be a 'small d' democrat instead of a 'capital D' Democrat elitist? Who knows, you might even win a few elections.

Bonus question: is your Democrat governor, Kathleen Blanco, 'white trash' or just an incompetent moron?

My eldest daughter talked me into a beagle puppy. Initially I didn't want to, was afraid it might be a Sully magnet.

However my fears were without foundation. The ladies go gaga over him.

Named him Moses.

The ladies go gaga over him.

Named him Moses.

So, Dave - absent a Red Sea in TX, what does your Beagle cause to part? I mean, can you provide us with anecdotes re: his, um "babe-magnetness?"

Just curious.

And there I was, forming my remarks to go after Sliver-Sized Salami... but everyone seems to have beaten me to it.

Hey SSS- are you talking shit about my home state through personal experience, or did you just read that?

Hell, I'd be impressed if you could find the place on the map.

tmi3rd

Everyone knows men that live in Pullman, Wash are impotent anyways, so why would they object???

I thought the title of this post was "Wal-Mart can make you important". Then I thought, "That makes no sense!" Then I read it again, and it still made no sense. But whatever.

Anyway. Zira, definitely. She may be smart, but she's uglier than Nova, so she'd be trying much harder. Plus, she'd use science to please her man. She'd have like algorithms and junk to make sure your get-down-get-funky shenanigans were happening with optimal effect.

Nova's got this clingy vibe about her, too. Zira's the choice pick here.

Moses?!!

*squeal!*

Dave in Texas, please take me to the Promised Land!

In college, I had a beagle-ish mutt. Smartest and sweetest dog ever. Oh, shit. Now I'm depressed.