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January 11, 2006
Giant Freakin' Bog-MummyThe preserved remains of two prehistoric men discovered in an Irish bog have revealed a couple of surprises --- one used hair gel and the other stood 6 foot 6 inches high, the tallest Iron Age body discovered. A hair-product from France? The deuce you say. The bodies, which are both male and have been dated to more than 2,000 years old, probably belong to the victims of a ritual sacrifice. Giant. Freakin'. Bog mummy. AoSHQ: Your on-line source for Call of Cthulhu adventure seeds. Incidentally, does anyone have the CoC game for the X-Box? Is it any good? Thanks to SarahW. posted by Ace at 02:07 PM
CommentsHow come the site is all in italics now? Posted by: on January 11, 2006 02:09 PM
Sorry to go OT right away, but this is just hilarious: You're the Diet Coke of evil. Posted by: Monty on January 11, 2006 02:11 PM
Ace of Spades - all italics, all the time. And that's just the f'ing way it is. Posted by: Dogstar on January 11, 2006 02:14 PM
I didn't know you could rope out of hazel. also, I don't quite follow this: Given that the life expectency was probably late 20s to early 30s, that strikes me as a reporter's assumption that Old Croghan man had a universal healthcare plan. Posted by: BumperStickerist on January 11, 2006 02:15 PM
Yes, I have Call of Cthulhu: Dark Corners of the Earth for XBox. It's good so far, but I haven't gone far very far in it yet, having just gotten it recently. Posted by: Disgruntled Monkey on January 11, 2006 02:17 PM
Dark Corners of the Earth is very good but very buggy. I ran into one glitch about halfway through that stopped me from going forward completely, and as I haven't X-Box Live I can't patch it. Speaking as someone who used to be an Alpha Tester, Bethesda's QA either wasn't given enough time by the suits (most likely explanation) or they need to be lined up against the wall and shot. It's worth playing, but expect bugs galore. Oh, and play the game in Boy Scout mode. It's hard enough that way; any other difficulty and you end up reloading dozens of times with the thrice-cursed console save system. Posted by: Gidgiddoni on January 11, 2006 02:23 PM
I wonder if the gel-boys were the first Irish broke-back mountaineers that got bogged down. Posted by: machs on January 11, 2006 02:27 PM
The bodies, which are both male and have been dated to more than 2,000 years old, probably belong to the victims of a ritual sacrifice. He had been horrifically tortured before death. His nipples had been cut and he had been stabbed in the ribs. A cut on his arm suggested he had tried to defend himself during the attack that ended his life. The young man was later beheaded and dismembered. Ireslam: the predecessor of, well, you know. Posted by: on January 11, 2006 02:28 PM
The bodies, which are both male and have been dated to more than 2,000 years old, probably belong to the victims of a ritual sacrifice. He had been horrifically tortured before death. His nipples had been cut and he had been stabbed in the ribs. A cut on his arm suggested he had tried to defend himself during the attack that ended his life. The young man was later beheaded and dismembered. Ireslam: the predecessor of, well, you know. Posted by: Joe Mama on January 11, 2006 02:29 PM
As far as time to develop this... this sonofabitchin' game has been in development for 3 or 4 years. Posted by: ace on January 11, 2006 02:29 PM
Sorry about the double-tap, ace. Posted by: Joe Mama on January 11, 2006 02:29 PM
Lots of screenshots of the Cthulhu game here. The graphics look great, but I probably won't get it. Right now, my Xbox time is pretty much spent playing Halo 2 online. Actually, to be completely honest, most of my time on Xbox live is spent getting mocked by what sounds like 10 year olds who manage to sneak up and assassinate me with a melee attack. Good times... Posted by: Slublog on January 11, 2006 02:31 PM
"In common with other bog bodies, they show signs of having been tortured before their deaths." Wait, they were tortured, and they wore hair-gel? Does Andrew Sullivan know about this yet? Cheers, P.S. Haven't played the CoC game yet, but I'm guessing it's a rental regardless (no multiplayer, right? No multiplayer = rental). Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge on January 11, 2006 02:40 PM
Since when is 2,000 years ago considered pre-historic? Posted by: A-10 on January 11, 2006 02:44 PM
I wonder if the gel-boys were the first Irish broke-back mountaineers that got bogged down.This guy thinks maybe so. Posted by: SarahW on January 11, 2006 02:57 PM
Hey, that's not what the preview looked like. try again: I wonder if the gel-boys were the first Irish broke-back mountaineers that got bogged down. This perfectly linked guy thinks so. Posted by: Sarah W on January 11, 2006 03:00 PM
Ace, Have you seen this? A NYT.com mention! Me too!
Posted by: Rightwingsparkle on January 11, 2006 03:03 PM
Posted by: Rightwingsparkle on January 11, 2006 03:04 PM
They have found two mummies in irish bog and the were the victims of human sacrifice the same thing that radical animal rights fanatic and envirlentalists want us to do Posted by: spurwing plover on January 11, 2006 03:06 PM
This has to be the same poster. Is that true SP? ace of spades - spurwing plover Posted by: on January 11, 2006 03:21 PM
This perfectly linked guy thinks so. Posted by Sarah W at January 11, 2006 03:00 PM OMG...it's Cmdr Riker! I knew that danged Betazoid was his beard! Posted by: speedster1 on January 11, 2006 03:27 PM
Something about Cheney: This one time, Dick Cheney was bound hand and foot and thrown into an Irish peat bog, face down. After a few days they cut him down, and that's the Dick Cheney we know today. The rest binds the Library of Congress and three 15th century copies of "Der Totentanz." Posted by: on January 11, 2006 03:40 PM
A 6 ft 6 inch bog mummy found with a 5 foot 2 inch gelled-hair bog mummy? I sense butch and bitch here in the 'ol bog. Posted by: Feisty on January 11, 2006 03:41 PM
This has to be the same poster. Is that true SP? I've been wondering about spurwing and birdzilla, but birdzilla uses LOTS of CAPS, especially when listing names, like TED KENNEDY. I haven't noticed spurwing doing that. Posted by: adolfo velasquez on January 11, 2006 04:09 PM
adolfo, they have the same email address. Spurwing has also posted under a different bird species here on AOSHQ. (I've spotted his comments when I was reading older posts.) I have seen him put names and other words in all caps, but maybe he hasn't done it recently. Posted by: Mrs. Peel on January 11, 2006 04:33 PM
Spurwing Plover does not do interviews, dammit! Yes, it is him. Not exactly advanced sleuthing. As you can see our friend Spurwing has an affinity for all things avian, except for, of course, CHIKWINS. Posted by: on January 11, 2006 04:34 PM
Is Spurwing an ornithologist? Why all the bird names and bird references? Posted by: Bart on January 11, 2006 04:40 PM
A mere mention of the name KENNEDY, also ruffles his feathers. Posted by: on January 11, 2006 04:44 PM
When I first read the title of this post, I thought it said Giant Freakin' Blog-Mummy. But yeah, a Bog-Mummy is probably quite a bit better. By the way, Spurwing Plover is a prolific poster all over the internet, not just here. Posted by: sandy burger on January 11, 2006 05:26 PM
I like SP. Stream of consciousness-like. Different. (Makes more sense than some other posters.) I always thought SP was a woman, though. My bad. Posted by: Muslihoon on January 11, 2006 06:51 PM
I always thought SP was a woman, though. My bad. Oh. You were having *those* kind of thoughts. lol! Posted by: shawn on January 11, 2006 08:28 PM
And along with the BANSHEES and LEPERCUANS and now you know why ST PATRICK went there Posted by: spurwing plover on January 11, 2006 11:31 PM
Come on, Spurwing Plover. Throw me a friggin' bone, here. Tell us about yourself. Anything at all. It could be something trivial. For example, do you like pizza? Posted by: sandy burger on January 11, 2006 11:48 PM
Also, can I call you Spurwing? Or how about Plover? Or maybe just SP? Whatever works. But maybe the full Spurwing Plover is best. Let me know if you have a preference. Posted by: sandy burger on January 11, 2006 11:51 PM
Cthulhu -- I avoid this word because I don't know how to pronounce it. P.S. Here's a hint for Sandy: Spur likes bread crumbs. Drop a few and wait patiently. Posted by: Bart on January 12, 2006 12:14 AM
Bart -- I avoid this word because I don't know how to pronounce it. Posted by: cthulhu on January 12, 2006 02:26 AM
In a letter, Lovecraft said that Cthulhu was supposed to be unpronouncable by humans, but that a reasonable approximation would be "TLUH-luh." OK, I just buried the geek needle. Does that earn us a repeat shot of BBeck's curvaceousness? Posted by: WarrenM on January 12, 2006 09:31 AM
Well, I'll tell you why St. Patrick really went to Ireland. He wasn't Irish; he was kidnapped and taken to Ireland as a slave. I don't remember the details, but he eventually freed himself, educated himself, and returned to Ireland in order to preach Christianity and end slavery. Instead of hating the people who had mistreated him so much, he forgave and saved them. It is said that St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland, but it's not literally true, obviously; it's a metaphor. Posted by: SJKevin on January 12, 2006 02:30 PM
Come on, Spurwing Plover. Throw me a friggin' bone, here. Tell us about yourself. Anything at all. Spurwing does not give guys boners. Here's something I've learned about Spurwing, you may find fascinating: He likes Roger Miller songs. In fact, he led a little sing a long on another website. Sing and maybe he will join you? Posted by: shawn on January 13, 2006 08:47 PM
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What? Skeleton of the most famous Musketeer, D'Artagnan, possibly discovered in Dutch church closet.
Dumas picked four names of real musketeers out of a history book, D'Artagnan, Athos, Aramis, and Porthos. So there was an actual D'Artagnan, though he made most of the story up. (Or, you know, all of it.)* Charles de Batz de Castelmore, known as d'Artagnan, the famous musketeer of Kings Louis XIII and Louis XIV, spent his life in the service of the French crown. A lot of Dumas's stories are based on bits of real history. The plot of the >Three Musketeers, about trying to recover lost diamonds from the queen's necklace, was cribbed from the then-almost-contemporaneous Affair of the Queen's Necklace. And the Man in the Iron Mask is based on real accounts of a prisoner forced to wear a mask (though I think it was a velvet mask). * Oh, I should mention, Dumas says all this, about finding the names in an old book, in the prologue to his novel. But authors lie a lot. They frequently present fictions as based on historic fact. The twist is, he was actually telling the truth here. At least about these four musketeers having actually existed and served under Louis XIV. Fun fact: You know the beginning of A Fistful of Dollars where the local gunslingers make fun of Clint Eastwood's donkey and Eastwood demands they apologize to the donkey? That's lifted from The Three Musketeers. Rochefort mocks D'Artagnan's old, brokedown farm horse and D'Artagnan is incensed.
A commenter asked which should be read first, The Hobbit of LOTR?
Easy, no question -- read The Hobbit first. It's actually the start of the story and comes first chronologically. It sets up some major characters and major pieces in play in LOTR. Also, the Hobbit is Beginner-Friendly, which LOTR isn't. The Hobbit really is a delightful book, and a fast read. It's chatty, it's casual, it's exciting, and it's funny. In that dry cheeky British humor way. I love that the narrator is constantly making little asides and commentary, like he's just sitting next to you telling you this story as it occurs to him. LOTR is a very long story. Fifteen hundred pages or so. The Hobbit is relatively short and very punchy and easy to read. If you don't like The Hobbit, you can skip out on LOTR. If you do like it, you'll be primed to read LOTR. Oh, I should say: The Hobbit is written as if it's for children, but one of those smart children's stories that are also for adults. Don't worry, there's also real fighting and violence and horror in it, too. LOTR is written for adults. (It's said that Tolkien wrote both for his children, but LOTR was written 17 years later, when his children were adults.) Some might not like The Hobbit due to its sometimes frivolous tone. Me, I love it. I find it constantly amusing. Both are really good but there is a starkly different tone to both. LOTR is epic, grand, and serious, about a world war, The Hobbit is light and breezy, and about a heist. Though a heist that culminates in a war for the spoils.
The Hobbit Challenge: Read two more chapters. I didn't have much time. Bilbo got the ring.
I noticed a continuity problem. Maybe. Now, as of the time of The Hobbit, it was unknown that this magic ring was in fact a Ring of Power, and it was doubly unknown that it was the Ring of Power, the Master Ring that controlled the others. But the narrator -- who we will learn in LOTR was none of than Bilbo himself, who wrote the book as "There and Back Again" -- says this about Gollum's ring: "But who knows how Gollum had come by that present [the Ring], ages ago in the old days when such rings were still at large in the world? Perhaps even the Master who ruled them could not have said." In another passage, the ring is identified as a "ring of power." I don't know, I always thought there was a distinction between mere magic rings and the Rings of Power created by Sauron. But this suggests that Bilbo knew this was a ring of power created by Sauron. Now I don't remember when Bilbo wrote the Hobbit. In the movie, he shows Frodo the book in Rivendell, and I guess he wrote it after he left the Shire. I guess he might have added in the part about the ring being a ring of power created by "the Master" after Gandalf appraised him of his research into the ring. I never noticed this before. I know Tolkien re-wrote this chapter while he was writing LOTR to make the ring important from the start. And also to make Gollum more sinister and evil, and also to remove the part where Gollum actually offers Bilbo the ring as a "present" -- Bilbo had already found it on his own, but Gollum was wiling to give it away, which obviously is not something the rewritten Gollum would ever do. But I had no memory of the ring being suggested to be The Ring so early in the tale.
Finish the job, Mr. President!
Melanie Phillips lays out the case for the total destruction of the Iranian government and armed forces. [CBD]
Oh, I forgot to mention this quote from Pete Hegseth, reported by Roger Kimball: "We are sharing the ocean with the Iranian Navy. We're giving them the bottom half."
Batman fires The Batman
Batman is disgusted by the Joachim Phoenix version of Joker Batman tries to fire Superman Batman is still workshopping his Bat-Voice
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: Red Leather Suit and Sweatband Edition
And I was here to please I'm even on knees Makin' love to whoever I please I gotta do it my way Or no way at all
Tomorrow is March 25th, "Tolkien Reading Day," because March 25th is the day when the Ring is destroyed in the book. I think I'm going to start the Hobbit tomorrow and read all four books this time.
The only bad part of the trilogy are the Frodo/Sam chapters in The Two Towers. They're repetitive, slow, and mostly about the weather and terrain. But most everything else is good. Weirdly, the Frodo-Sam chapters in Return of the King are exciting and action-packed and among the best in the trilogy. (Though the chapters with everyone else in Return of the King get pretty slow again. Mostly people talking about marching towards war, and then marching towards war.)
Sec. Army recognizes ODU Army ROTC cadets for their bravery and sacrifice in private ceremony
[Hat Tip: Diogenes] [CBD]
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click
One day I'm gonna write a poem in a letter One day I'm gonna get that faculty together Remember that everybody has to wait in line Oh, [Song Title], look out world, oh, you know I've got mine
US decimation of Iran's ICBM forces is due to Space Force's instant detection of launches -- and the launchers' hiding places -- and rapid counter-attack via missiles
AI is doing a lot of the work in analyzing images to find the exact hiding place of the launchers. Counter-strikes are now coming in four hours after a launch, whereas previously it might have taken days for humans to go over the imagery and data.
Robert Mueller, Former Special Counsel Who Probed Trump, Dies
“robert mueller just died,” trump wrote in a truth social post on march 21. “good, i’m glad he’s dead. he can no longer hurt innocent people! president donald j. trump.”
Canadian School Designates Cafeteria And Lunchroom As "No Food Zones" For Ramadan
Canada and the UK are neck and neck in the race to become the first western country to fall to Islam [CBD] Recent Comments
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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