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November 14, 2005
You Don't Have to Be Human...to live the Ace Of Spades Lifestyle. Somebody should tell those zookeepers about Valu-Rite Vodka and Klonopin jello-shots. posted by LauraW. at 06:39 PM
CommentsThe park is home only to Modesto and a few ducks. Seems poignant and kinky at the same time. Posted by: geoff on November 14, 2005 07:00 PM
He has never had a sexual partner. This is part of the AoS Lifestyle? I'm going to have to reevaluate the whole thing now. Posted by: Dave in Texas on November 14, 2005 07:19 PM
He has never had a sexual partner. That's not quite fair - after all: "He's mounted a tree, a fence and even a shed." That does smack of the AoS lifestyle. Posted by: geoff on November 14, 2005 07:30 PM
Hmmm.... The AoS life style or the convent. Tough choice. I'll take the convent. mheh. Posted by: Maranna on November 14, 2005 07:31 PM
The AoS lifestyle sounds like it equates to a couple of boat payments for a "discreet" urologist. Posted by: tachyonshuggy on November 14, 2005 07:57 PM
I heard Ace got arrested once for humping a birch tree in Central Park in broad daylight. The NYPD were really nice about it though. They let him finish, and gave him some salve. Posted by: lauraw on November 14, 2005 07:58 PM
But the tree! Did it live? Where's the salve for it? boohoo.....poor birch. Soon to have a little son of a birch. Posted by: Maranna on November 14, 2005 08:05 PM
Sorry, Lauraw, but nasty-ass minds want to know. Posted by: Maranna on November 14, 2005 08:06 PM
This post raises some fascinating issues. The first issue is: What exactly are the google search terms that Laura uses when she is looking for material for a post? And, really, how sick is she? Posted by: Michael on November 14, 2005 08:31 PM
Answers: The tree declined to press charges. She only has a three-day memory, thank goodness. Michael: 'hot giraffe p*rn wood wooden structures and trees' and I'm not really like this. I don't do this for a living. Posted by: lauraw on November 14, 2005 08:54 PM
several birch-humanoid saplings in her vicinity had to be uprooted and destroyed... Such a shame - they might have turned into Ents. Posted by: geoff on November 14, 2005 08:58 PM
lauraw, Are you in NYC? Posted by: Rightwingsparkle on November 14, 2005 09:05 PM
No, Connecticut. Posted by: lauraw on November 14, 2005 09:06 PM
Gives a whole new meaning to "tree hugger", doesn't it? Oh, the humanity! Oy! The splinters! Posted by: Maranna on November 14, 2005 09:07 PM
Sorry for this self indulgent comment (part of the Ace lifestyle?) But lookey! I am quoted in an online women's magazine about women bloggers. "Broads on Blogs." The quotes from "Kathy" would be ME. http://www.sadiemag.com/feature3.php cool, huh? Posted by: Rightwingsparkle on November 14, 2005 09:08 PM
These were piss-poor Ents Geoff. They kept shooting off fireworks in the park and blaming Puerto Rican kids for it. Posted by: lauraw on November 14, 2005 09:09 PM
"No, Connecticut" RWS: As one who has followed Laura's comments carefully, perhaps I can add some details. Laura owns a store in a small town in Connecticut that is something like Mailboxes, Etc. She spends her days wrapping parcels to be shipped elsewhere (i.e., menial unskilled labor). There is not one single homosexual in this town; hence her predilection for telling others that they are fags. Her home is on the edge of a swamp infested by coyotes. The house itself is upscale by local standards: a 1986 Boise Cascade 70' double-wide, complete with skirting, tie-downs to prevent tornado damage, and heat tape on all the exposed plumbing underneath so it won't freeze in the winter. Posted by: Michael on November 14, 2005 09:33 PM
Somebody should tell those zookeepers about Valu-Rite Vodka and Klonopin jello-shots. Naw, ace prefers Val-U-Rite and antifreeze. I think it's the fluorescent green color that he likes. Posted by: OregonMuse on November 14, 2005 09:43 PM
Oh Michael. Just you. Posted by: lauraw on November 14, 2005 10:53 PM
I don't tell 'others' that they are fags.
In a strange way, I am honored by this. So, Laura, here's a tip from a former trailor-park denizen: It's November; plug in the heat tape (unless you went fancy-schmancy and got the heat tape that's thermostically controlled.) If you wait much longer and those pipes bust during a serious freeze, you will have major problems. Trust me on this. Posted by: Michael on November 15, 2005 12:29 AM
I live in a house. With a mouse. And a spouse. It sounds sappy but I'm happy, I was probably born that way. Posted by: lauraw on November 15, 2005 12:47 AM
Inventor of Klonopin jello-shots (circa 1981) => Master of None Posted by: Master of None on November 15, 2005 12:50 AM
I live in a house. With a mouse. And a spouse. Uh-oh, Michael. I think you may have inadvertently triggered either another Spring-type poem episode, or a haiku contest. Posted by: geoff on November 15, 2005 12:59 AM
God bless you, Laura. It's a rare person who has achieved the wisdom to be content with their life. It's not easy to overlook all the disappointments, and just enjoy what you have. But, I would trap the fucking mouse. They tend to shit all over the place. Just sayin'. Your life might be a bit better if you croak that little bastard. Posted by: Michael on November 15, 2005 01:04 AM
I think you may have inadvertently triggered either another Spring-type poem episode, or a haiku contest. I was thinking Dr. Seuss. Posted by: VRWC Agent on November 15, 2005 01:29 AM
Just transport the critter up to Enumclaw WA and just make it known that there's a Giraffe available to ummm... do things to freaks who are into that sort of stuff. The critter will be awash in freak booty in no time and they can charge admission and sell the video on PPV. Posted by: Purple Avenger on November 15, 2005 02:07 AM
Purple: I always look forward to your comments. Either they are really funny, or very astute and to the point. Either way you always add something good. Posted by: j.a. on November 15, 2005 09:21 AM
I think you may have inadvertently triggered either another Spring-type poem episode, or a haiku contest. And speaking of which, did ace ever pass out the winners of the last poetry slam, or did he just pass out? Posted by: OregonMuse on November 15, 2005 11:02 AM
Monty won. Let's move on. Posted by: lauraw on November 15, 2005 11:09 AM
That sounded curt and it was not intended to sound that way. Posted by: lauraw on November 15, 2005 11:55 AM
That's some zoo the beaners have got there--a lone giraffe and some ducks. Sounds like a real uplifting family destination. I think I'll take some time off from my job reposessing trailer homes and try to lighten up some at this incredibly pathetic zoo. Posted by: spongeworthy on November 15, 2005 12:02 PM
Dude, if you can't have fun watching a giraffe hump buildings, I don't know what can be done for you. Your heart is dead. Posted by: lauraw on November 15, 2005 12:14 PM
The article does not mention it, but I'm sure this zoo has some chiggers too. And a grackle. Don't forget that. Posted by: Dave in Texas on November 15, 2005 12:49 PM
"14 species of large animals capable of domesitcation in the history of mankind. They point out Africans’ failed attempts to domesticate the elephant and zebra, the latter being an animal they illustrate that had utmost importance for it's applicability in transformation from a hunting/gathering to agrarian-based civilization. The roots of racism are not of this earth. Austrailia, aboriginals:::No domesticable animals.
AIDS in Africa.
1. MUCK - perhaps have experienced multiple universal contractions (have seen multiple big bangs), creator of the artificial intelligence humans ignorantly refer to as "god" Terrestrial management: 4. Chinese/egyptians - this may be separated into the eastern and western worlds Movies foreshadowing catastrophy Many Muslims are being used like the Germans and Japanese of WWII::being used to hurt others and envoke condemnation upon their people. They can affect the weather and Hurricane Katrina was accomplished for many reasons and involves many interests, as anything this historical is::
This is the system on earth because this is the system everywhere. I don't want to suggest the upper eschelons are evil and good is the fringe.
The clues are there which companies are favored and which are disfavored, market domination being one clue, but they conceal it very hard because it is so crucial. I offer an example of historical proportions::: Media ridicule and lawsuits are creations to reinforce people's belief that Walmart is evil. The middle class is being deceived. They are being misled into the unfavored, and subsequently will have no assistance from their purchases with corporate america. I believe the coining of the term "Uncle Sam" was a clue alluding to just this::Sam Walton and WalMart is one of few saviors of the peasant class.
Royalty is the right way to organize a society. Dictatorships and monarchies are a reflection of the antient's hierarchical organization.
Simpson's foreshadowing::Helloween IV special, Flanders is Satan. "Last one you ever suspect."
Posted by: grandpa stole bets on November 15, 2005 02:43 PM
Anybody catch this gem in the above rectal spillage? Simpson's foreshadowing::Helloween IV special, Flanders is Satan. "Last one you ever suspect." BWAAA HA HAA HAAA Posted by: lauraw on November 15, 2005 03:03 PM
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NeverTrump Nebraska Congressman Don Bacon throws in the towel, won't seek reelection in 2026
I wonder if he's the one who complained about the BBB imposing work requirements on able-bodied adults without children for Medicaid.
Ever Wonder How The Woke Left Can Be So Obviously Hypocritical And Automatically Reject All Opposing Facts? Below are four short 5 minute videos of author Melanie Phillips explaining why.
The Disturbing Logic Of The Left.***
The Psychology Behind Why the WOKE Left Can't Win Arguments.***
The Bizarre Union of Woke and Jihad.***
Truth is a Right Wing Concept. [dri]
Wow, Katie Perry is having a rough couple of years: like her career, her engagement to Orlando Bloom is now over
The Trump Curse strikes again. She went from an apolitical ditz to a Hillary Clinton Crusader in 2016 and her career bottomed out like Hillary Clinton's blood sugar level after a weekend of vodka and self-pity. The Trump Curse even follows you into space, yo. Or at least into the lower upper atmosphere.
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click, I Can't Believe It's Not Night Ranger Edition
If you would just be sensible You'd find me indispensable I pray deep down to destiny That it places you with me Whoa, wanting you here in the sheets Wandering around incomplete Waiting so long I'm pretty sure I've linked this before but it's a banger.
Republican running for Mitch McConnell's seat literally trashes him in new ad
It's the anniversary of the Biden debate debacle.
Biden's senility becomes undeniable. The Democrats pronounced that he had clearly triumphed in the debate. How CNN reported Biden's "intense" debate prep before the debate and then after. Amy Klobuchar predicted victory. The Washington Examiner looks back at the Night of Great Stuttering.
Kari Lake, just when I think you couldn't get any dumber, you pull a stunt like this, and totally redeem yourself!!!
I think the Democrat is arguing that the political appointees should exercise no control over their rabidly communist VOA employees. This is what they're always arguing -- they stock the bureaucracy with literal communists and then claim that the voters should have no control over these unfirable radicals. Lake offers a for-instance that will appeal to this Democrat of allegedly-suspect bedroom guests.
Senator Rounds invites Trump to "an appreciation event like you've never seen" at the Sturgis Bike Rally
Obviously Trump should go. LOS ANGELES (AP) -- Lalo Schifrin, the composer behind the iconic 'Mission: Impossible' theme and many more film and TV scores, dies at 93. This post will self-destruct in five seconds.
Chuck Schumer hospitalized after experiencing "lightheadness" while attempting to diagram a Kamala Harris sentence
Wait, it says he was supposedly working out at the gym. Sure, whatev's. Maybe he had a fight with Harry Reid's exercise bands. Recent Comments
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