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November 07, 2005
You Know You’re No Longer Wanted When…Terrell Owens is done in Philly. He’ll serve out the remainder of his four game unpaid suspension, then it’s onto season ending ‘deactivation’ due to "a large number of situations that accumulated over a long period of time," said coach Andy Reid. Frankly, the guy just wore out his welcome. How bad did it get? Well, the media gathered near Owen’s residence, wanting a quote on this latest development, and caught this detail: [T]wo pizzas were delivered to Owens' home. Someone answered the door -- not Owens -- and gave deliveryman James McDevitt a $5 tip. Yeah, it’s time to move on. (H/T Tim Higgins and MNF) posted by Dr. Reo Symes at 10:30 PM
Commentsthe Patriots aren't in our heads any longer, life is good. Posted by: moflicky on November 8, 2005 12:39 AM
I hear there is an opening for a self-centered asshole on the Oakland Raiders to replace an injured wide receiver. Posted by: schroedinger's cat© on November 8, 2005 12:52 AM
As a long time 49ers fan, let me just say... ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. That felt good. Posted by: Steve on November 8, 2005 01:15 AM
I agree things have reached the point of no return with Owens. The Eagles should just cut him after the suspension ends, even if it means they take a salary cap hit. I don't know if you've ever met anyone from the PA/OH/WV area, but they are a mercilessly unforgiving bunch (especially when it comes to sports), and Owens' continued presence on the team would just be hell on everyone. Picture this, though, as a possibility in 2006: "Collins under center, Moss split left, Owens right ..." This man was simply born to be a Raider. Posted by: Blacksheep on November 8, 2005 04:23 AM
Based on what he'll lose out on his Eagles contract and his loss of desirability among other teams, Owens really may lose millions because he's acted like such a tool. Although he didn't need any help in that department, he was aided and abetted in his clown act by "super agent" Drew Rosenhaus. Nice job, Drew. Genius. If Owens goes to the Raiders to vogue alongside Moss, they'll need to play the game with two footballs to keep everyone happy. They'll also need at least three locker rooms. Posted by: Gobsmacked to the core on November 8, 2005 08:46 AM
- fwiw, Greg Garrity was my favorite Eagles receiver, not the best, just my favorite. - Posted by: BumperStickerist on November 8, 2005 09:16 AM
How do contracts work in the NFL? If he is not picked up by another team do the Eagles have to pay him? What if another team does pick him up but for less money, are the Eagles obliged to make up the difference?
Posted by: scott on November 8, 2005 09:19 AM
I wonder if they put 'extra toppings' on that pizza. Posted by: lauraw on November 8, 2005 09:22 AM
lauraw, no shit. old rule, good rule. never piss off people who prepare your food. Posted by: Dave in Texas on November 8, 2005 09:37 AM
Am I just a cheap bastard? Since when is a fiver not a good enough tip for a pizza delivery? I know gas prices are higher and drivers have to pay for their own gas. Is it because he's a wealthy and should tip better? Somebody help a poor dense sob out. I'm hungover. Too many 23 oz. beers at BW3's watching the Colts finally pound a battered Patriots team. Posted by: compos mentis on November 8, 2005 09:38 AM
cm - i think by not taking the tip the delivery guy was showing his disapproval of Owens. Posted by: ydlw on November 8, 2005 09:45 AM
T.O. the human version of the LRAD. Point it at a team and they run scared. Posted by: Mike on November 8, 2005 09:49 AM
I'm a big SF fan (don't laugh). When TO first came up with the 9ers, I thought, here was the replacement for the aging Jerry Rice, and would be future of the franchise. The guy's talent was impressive. Then his personality showed up. Jeepers. Posted by: OregonMuse on November 8, 2005 09:55 AM
Am I the only gal here who thinks in that ad to the right Larry the Cable Guy is sexy as all git out? Posted by: lauraw on November 8, 2005 10:11 AM
ydlw - well, I thought that. But leaving a fiver on the porch isn't much of a protest is it. What if he'd been given a twenty or a fifty? Would he have shown his disapproval of Owens then? I doubt it. I agree that it's too bad his tremendous talent is overshadowed by his ego and his mouth. It's one thing to talk trash, which I don't like either, but another completely to talk it to your own teammates. Posted by: compos mentis on November 8, 2005 10:14 AM
lw - Am I the only gal here who thinks in that ad to the right Larry the Cable Guy is sexy as all git out? Hitting the sauce a little early aren't we dear? How many have you had? Posted by: compos mentis on November 8, 2005 10:16 AM
Well thats as close to beefcake as we get here. No, Spidey does not count. Posted by: lauraw on November 8, 2005 10:43 AM
Good point. I guess you could always venture over to Garfield Ridge for some nekkid Hasselhoff if you get really desperate. Posted by: compos mentis on November 8, 2005 11:01 AM
I think it's a subtle plot to get you to set the bar lower lauraw. it appears to be working too. Posted by: Dave in Texas on November 8, 2005 11:03 AM
The coolest part about TO showboating on the Dallas star was when he got whomped by that cowboy. I hate the cowboys, but I can respect them ensuring that outsiders have respect for their house. Posted by: joeindc44 on November 8, 2005 11:14 AM
There's a sexy man in there, trust me. It just happens to be under 50 lbs of shaky fat. Posted by: lauraw on November 8, 2005 11:19 AM
Dallas should pick up TO off waivers. Then for the first time in his NFL career, Terry Glenn can be the sane one. Posted by: Bob Hawkins on November 8, 2005 11:26 AM
Doesn't suprise me. He's definitely the 'childiest' person of the NFL. Posted by: Wong PoKér Hu on November 8, 2005 12:19 PM
And now he apologizes and says he wants back in... if the Eagles cave and take this... God, I don't even begin to have the colorful vocabulary necessary to describe this masturbatory fuckwad... if the Eagles take this jerkwad back, I will reluctantly admit that their front office is stupider than even that of my beloved Saints (and that is a pretty damning curse if you ask me). tmi3rd Posted by: tmi3rd on November 8, 2005 03:27 PM
It's the Oakland Raiders franchise that has been the traditional home (sinkhole) for the the NFL's thugs, felons, psychopaths, reform school dropouts, petty criminals, cut-ups, show-offs, etc. TO would be right at home here. Posted by: OregonMuse on November 8, 2005 04:52 PM
Lordy, lauraw, have you lost your mind? If all it takes is 50 lbs of fat to set you off, I'd have you in orbit before you knocked on the door, what with an extra c-note or so around what used to be a fairly decent set of abs. OregonMuse: Does T.O. play basketball? He would fit right in with the Jailblazers! Posted by: Carlos on November 8, 2005 10:03 PM
I think the Eagles are trippin. What did he do? Run his mouth? C'mon. He can come to my beloved Lions anytime. I'll even throw in Joey Harrington. Posted by: fugazi on November 8, 2005 11:36 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
What? Skeleton of the most famous Musketeer, D'Artagnan, possibly discovered in Dutch church closet.
Dumas picked four names of real musketeers out of a history book, D'Artagnan, Athos, Aramis, and Porthos. So there was an actual D'Artagnan, though he made most of the story up. (Or, you know, all of it.)* Charles de Batz de Castelmore, known as d'Artagnan, the famous musketeer of Kings Louis XIII and Louis XIV, spent his life in the service of the French crown. A lot of Dumas's stories are based on bits of real history. The plot of the >Three Musketeers, about trying to recover lost diamonds from the queen's necklace, was cribbed from the then-almost-contemporaneous Affair of the Queen's Necklace. And the Man in the Iron Mask is based on real accounts of a prisoner forced to wear a mask (though I think it was a velvet mask). * Oh, I should mention, Dumas says all this, about finding the names in an old book, in the prologue to his novel. But authors lie a lot. They frequently present fictions as based on historic fact. The twist is, he was actually telling the truth here. At least about these four musketeers having actually existed and served under Louis XIV. Fun fact: You know the beginning of A Fistful of Dollars where the local gunslingers make fun of Clint Eastwood's donkey and Eastwood demands they apologize to the donkey? That's lifted from The Three Musketeers. Rochefort mocks D'Artagnan's old, brokedown farm horse and D'Artagnan is incensed.
A commenter asked which should be read first, The Hobbit of LOTR?
Easy, no question -- read The Hobbit first. It's actually the start of the story and comes first chronologically. It sets up some major characters and major pieces in play in LOTR. Also, the Hobbit is Beginner-Friendly, which LOTR isn't. The Hobbit really is a delightful book, and a fast read. It's chatty, it's casual, it's exciting, and it's funny. In that dry cheeky British humor way. I love that the narrator is constantly making little asides and commentary, like he's just sitting next to you telling you this story as it occurs to him. LOTR is a very long story. Fifteen hundred pages or so. The Hobbit is relatively short and very punchy and easy to read. If you don't like The Hobbit, you can skip out on LOTR. If you do like it, you'll be primed to read LOTR. Oh, I should say: The Hobbit is written as if it's for children, but one of those smart children's stories that are also for adults. Don't worry, there's also real fighting and violence and horror in it, too. LOTR is written for adults. (It's said that Tolkien wrote both for his children, but LOTR was written 17 years later, when his children were adults.) Some might not like The Hobbit due to its sometimes frivolous tone. Me, I love it. I find it constantly amusing. Both are really good but there is a starkly different tone to both. LOTR is epic, grand, and serious, about a world war, The Hobbit is light and breezy, and about a heist. Though a heist that culminates in a war for the spoils.
The Hobbit Challenge: Read two more chapters. I didn't have much time. Bilbo got the ring.
I noticed a continuity problem. Maybe. Now, as of the time of The Hobbit, it was unknown that this magic ring was in fact a Ring of Power, and it was doubly unknown that it was the Ring of Power, the Master Ring that controlled the others. But the narrator -- who we will learn in LOTR was none of than Bilbo himself, who wrote the book as "There and Back Again" -- says this about Gollum's ring: "But who knows how Gollum had come by that present [the Ring], ages ago in the old days when such rings were still at large in the world? Perhaps even the Master who ruled them could not have said." In another passage, the ring is identified as a "ring of power." I don't know, I always thought there was a distinction between mere magic rings and the Rings of Power created by Sauron. But this suggests that Bilbo knew this was a ring of power created by Sauron. Now I don't remember when Bilbo wrote the Hobbit. In the movie, he shows Frodo the book in Rivendell, and I guess he wrote it after he left the Shire. I guess he might have added in the part about the ring being a ring of power created by "the Master" after Gandalf appraised him of his research into the ring. I never noticed this before. I know Tolkien re-wrote this chapter while he was writing LOTR to make the ring important from the start. And also to make Gollum more sinister and evil, and also to remove the part where Gollum actually offers Bilbo the ring as a "present" -- Bilbo had already found it on his own, but Gollum was wiling to give it away, which obviously is not something the rewritten Gollum would ever do. But I had no memory of the ring being suggested to be The Ring so early in the tale.
Finish the job, Mr. President!
Melanie Phillips lays out the case for the total destruction of the Iranian government and armed forces. [CBD]
Oh, I forgot to mention this quote from Pete Hegseth, reported by Roger Kimball: "We are sharing the ocean with the Iranian Navy. We're giving them the bottom half."
Batman fires The Batman
Batman is disgusted by the Joachim Phoenix version of Joker Batman tries to fire Superman Batman is still workshopping his Bat-Voice
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: Red Leather Suit and Sweatband Edition
And I was here to please I'm even on knees Makin' love to whoever I please I gotta do it my way Or no way at all
Tomorrow is March 25th, "Tolkien Reading Day," because March 25th is the day when the Ring is destroyed in the book. I think I'm going to start the Hobbit tomorrow and read all four books this time.
The only bad part of the trilogy are the Frodo/Sam chapters in The Two Towers. They're repetitive, slow, and mostly about the weather and terrain. But most everything else is good. Weirdly, the Frodo-Sam chapters in Return of the King are exciting and action-packed and among the best in the trilogy. (Though the chapters with everyone else in Return of the King get pretty slow again. Mostly people talking about marching towards war, and then marching towards war.)
Sec. Army recognizes ODU Army ROTC cadets for their bravery and sacrifice in private ceremony
[Hat Tip: Diogenes] [CBD]
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click
One day I'm gonna write a poem in a letter One day I'm gonna get that faculty together Remember that everybody has to wait in line Oh, [Song Title], look out world, oh, you know I've got mine
US decimation of Iran's ICBM forces is due to Space Force's instant detection of launches -- and the launchers' hiding places -- and rapid counter-attack via missiles
AI is doing a lot of the work in analyzing images to find the exact hiding place of the launchers. Counter-strikes are now coming in four hours after a launch, whereas previously it might have taken days for humans to go over the imagery and data.
Robert Mueller, Former Special Counsel Who Probed Trump, Dies
“robert mueller just died,” trump wrote in a truth social post on march 21. “good, i’m glad he’s dead. he can no longer hurt innocent people! president donald j. trump.”
Canadian School Designates Cafeteria And Lunchroom As "No Food Zones" For Ramadan
Canada and the UK are neck and neck in the race to become the first western country to fall to Islam [CBD] Recent Comments
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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