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The Deplorable Gourmet
A Horde-sourced Cookbook
[All profits go to charity]

Top Headlines

Peter Cullen, voice actor for Optimus Prime (among many others) dies at home surrounded by family at age 85
RIP and Roll Out!

TJM discusses the career of Mel Brooks and why High Anxiety just isn't as good as Young Frankentsein

Podcast: Dolly Parton...an American classic, Michigan's El Sayed is part of our future destruction, More Global Warming nonsense, mail-in balloting restrictions, Darline Graham? Get rid of family dynasties...and more!

Breaking news: Dolly Parton had a real pair of 38s
Or at least one. She carried it everywhere for protection.
This joke brought to you by Benny Hill. And speaking of the British: The Buckingham Palace guard tributed her yesterday

Dolly Parton is badgered into saying something negative about Trump's bus-board locker-room talk, but refuses to bow to the media pressure, telling the twink agitator she learned long ago to "keep your damned mouth shut"
What I'm appreciating is that while her surface is soft and sweet, she's got some actual steel a centimeter underneath.

1977 interview shows that Barbara Walters has always been a seaward and Dolly Parton always had "country class"
Walters actually asks Dolly Parton if she knows that people think she's a joke. This because Walters can't get over the fact that a show-woman has 1, big breasts, and 2, dresses a bit outrageously because, get this, she's an entertainer. A stage performer. You know, someone people pay money to see live and expect them to put on a show.
She never would attack Liberace for wearing glitter-tuxedos. But she's mad that Dolly Parton makes Barbara Walters look bad through association (by being a woman). Babs, you wish people associated the two of you. Believe me, we can tell the difference.

Tim Curry, actor, butler, evil space clown and gay space vampire, and judge on American Duos, dies at age 80 after poor health due to a stroke in 2012

Dolly Parton: Stairway To Heaven
[CBD]

Dolly Parton Dies at 80
[CBD]

TJM talks about the films of Ralph Bakshi, director of the animated The Lord of the Rings and ranks them definitively

Candace Owens joins the Scooby Gang

An Inappropriate Use of the Song "Holiday Road"
Another inappropriate use

Tuq'r Qarlson: "I never mention Ben Shapiro because I don't think about him." Status: FALSE.

This Senator Fought Wildfires From Planes. Now He's Fighting Activists and Bureaucrats "senator tim sheehy on the 'unholy alliance' of environmental rules and activism that's preventing firefighters from doing their jobs..." [Hat Tip: Pete Bog] [CBD]

Dude trolls a city council meeting about permitting yet another mosque by promising the mosque will destroy the Constitution
"All women who are overweight or obese will have to wear burka. 10,000 steps per day, low carb."

Podcast: Will Cuba fall without a fight? More Iran confusion, gun rights for felons isn't a crazy idea, wetbacks are voting! And are data centers of the devil? Nope!

Google finally gets one right

Months ago, I reported that the final Zodiac cypher had been cracked and the name of the killer revealed. And the name of the killer turned out to be someone suspected in the unsolved Black Dahlia murder. The general tone of my mention of this was "serious you guys, this is real."
Well, it's not real. It's total bullshit.
Sorry about that. I did two things: 1, I bought into something, a conspiracy theory really, because it was new and exciting. And 2, I allowed a self-declared "expert" to snow me over with his "expert" claims about solving ciphers, an alleged expertise I could not challenge because I know practically nothing about codebreaking. I remember being similarly swindled by self-declared "experts" babbling about "chromatic aberrations." (Although I didn't really buy into that, but I found it "interesting" and I wasn't strongly skeptical about it. Hey they said they're "experts," they must know that they're talking about, right?)
I screwed up. It won't be the last time, I'm sure.

TJM definitively ranks the films of Andrei Tarkovsky and explains the joys of discovering older movies over anticipating new ones.

Podcast: In Wisconsin, the Dems steal an election from themselves, abortion is cheered in Massachusetts, Spain gets what it voted for, the economy is humming, and more!

Recent Comments

m: "w00t ..."

m: "Pixy's up! ..."

Skip: "Homo Sheepians ..."

Publius Redux: "I am constantly amazed at the crap every generatio ..."

m: ""wise man" (There's no "the" in there.) ..."

publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb): " Homo sapiens means "man the wise". We named ou ..."

Publius Redux: "Ah yes - The "because I want the result" theory of ..."

m: "There're two publiuses on here at the same time! ..."

publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb): " Homo sapiens in essentially modern anatomical ..."

tcn in AK: "Could not disagree more. Eratosthenes looked down ..."

m: "402 Kitenji Action Jackson Posted by: Publius Red ..."

tcn in AK: "Roberts is an *ss. Posted by: Publius Redux at ..."

Bloggers in Arms

Some Humorous Asides

Kaboom!

Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You

You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss
Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president.

A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta

Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me

Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn
Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty.

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon

A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates

Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree

Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility

The Dowd-O-Matic!

The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)


Advertise Here! Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Contact Ace: aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com Buck: buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com CBD: cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com joe mannix: mannix2024 at proton.me MisHum: petmorons at gee mail.com J.J. Sefton: sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com Recent Entries Daily Tech News 1 September 2026 The Monday Over Night Thread (8/31/26) The Dental Plan Has Expired Edition (Short) Monday Cafe Quick Hits Trump Announces Truly Huge Deal to... Take Over 65 Billion Barrels' Worth of Venezuela's Oil Reserves?! 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Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info: maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security Cutting The Cord [Joe Mannix (not a cop)] Cutting The Cord: It's Easier Than You Think [Blaster] Private Email and Secure Signatures [Hogmartin] Moron Meet-Ups Texas MoMe 2026: 10/16/2026-10/17/2026 Corsicana,TX Contact Ben Had for info	« Gay Cowboys Eating Pudding \| Main \| Rumsfeld Threatens Germany » November 07, 2005 What Does It Take to Make Soccer Exciting? Apparently the answer is 40,000 hookers. The new German motto: forget election paralysis and a moribund economy, we got beer, hookers and soccer! posted by Harry Callahan at 09:29 PM Comments But we've got drunken fighting lesbian cheerleaders. Still behind the curve, Eurotrash! Posted by: VRWC Agent on November 7, 2005 09:36 PM LOL VRWC "we got beer, hookers and soccer" is not far different from saying "we got beer, hookers and parcheesi" Posted by: Carl in N.H. on November 7, 2005 09:37 PM I've always said it was the metric system of sports. I mean soccer, of course. I'm not even sure what leagues you join for hookers, beer or violent drunken cheerleading lesbians. Posted by: VRWC Agent on November 8, 2005 12:00 AM Not even 40,000 hookers can make soccer exciting. Nothing can make soccer exciting. Posted by: on November 8, 2005 12:21 AM If the drunken cheerleader lesbians had just bendoing it in the men's room, none of this would have happened. Posted by: Steve L. on November 8, 2005 08:14 AM Whoever did the marketing for soccer in the US was a genius! That is the only possible explanation for the popularity of a sport that is only ever-so-slightly more exciting that watching grass grow. USA Rugby should have hired that guy. Posted by: J Rob on November 8, 2005 08:31 AM Lose the soccer, keep the hookers. Posted by: Goal ! on November 8, 2005 08:48 AM Asked what made for a great World Cup, a Swedish fan responded: "Hoors! T'ousands and t'ousands of hoors! Ya chure, by golly!" Posted by: mojo on November 8, 2005 10:38 AM If the drunken cheerleader lesbians had just bendoing it in the men's room, none of this would have happened. Amen, Steve L. A-freaking-men. Apparently they just got fired. I'm looking for the text. Posted by: Zorachus on November 8, 2005 12:10 PM Nothing can make soccer exciting. I was thinking that cheerleaders might help, but then I visualized what a French cheerleader would look like. 5 pom poms would be just too busy. Posted by: scott on November 8, 2005 12:34 PM Post a comment Name: Email Address: URL: Comments: Remember info?	Now Available! The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines Peter Cullen, voice actor for Optimus Prime (among many others) dies at home surrounded by family at age 85 RIP and Roll Out! TJM discusses the career of Mel Brooks and why High Anxiety just isn't as good as Young Frankentsein Podcast: Dolly Parton...an American classic, Michigan's El Sayed is part of our future destruction, More Global Warming nonsense, mail-in balloting restrictions, Darline Graham? Get rid of family dynasties...and more! Breaking news: Dolly Parton had a real pair of 38s Or at least one. She carried it everywhere for protection. This joke brought to you by Benny Hill. And speaking of the British: The Buckingham Palace guard tributed her yesterday Dolly Parton is badgered into saying something negative about Trump's bus-board locker-room talk, but refuses to bow to the media pressure, telling the twink agitator she learned long ago to "keep your damned mouth shut" What I'm appreciating is that while her surface is soft and sweet, she's got some actual steel a centimeter underneath. 1977 interview shows that Barbara Walters has always been a seaward and Dolly Parton always had "country class" Walters actually asks Dolly Parton if she knows that people think she's a joke. This because Walters can't get over the fact that a show-woman has 1, big breasts, and 2, dresses a bit outrageously because, get this, she's an entertainer. A stage performer. You know, someone people pay money to see live and expect them to put on a show. She never would attack Liberace for wearing glitter-tuxedos. But she's mad that Dolly Parton makes Barbara Walters look bad through association (by being a woman). Babs, you wish people associated the two of you. Believe me, we can tell the difference. Tim Curry, actor, butler, evil space clown and gay space vampire, and judge on American Duos, dies at age 80 after poor health due to a stroke in 2012 Dolly Parton: Stairway To Heaven [CBD] Dolly Parton Dies at 80 [CBD] TJM talks about the films of Ralph Bakshi, director of the animated The Lord of the Rings and ranks them definitively Candace Owens joins the Scooby Gang An Inappropriate Use of the Song "Holiday Road" Another inappropriate use Tuq'r Qarlson: "I never mention Ben Shapiro because I don't think about him." Status: FALSE. This Senator Fought Wildfires From Planes. Now He's Fighting Activists and Bureaucrats "senator tim sheehy on the 'unholy alliance' of environmental rules and activism that's preventing firefighters from doing their jobs..." [Hat Tip: Pete Bog] [CBD] Dude trolls a city council meeting about permitting yet another mosque by promising the mosque will destroy the Constitution "All women who are overweight or obese will have to wear burka. 10,000 steps per day, low carb." Podcast: Will Cuba fall without a fight? More Iran confusion, gun rights for felons isn't a crazy idea, wetbacks are voting! And are data centers of the devil? Nope! Google finally gets one right Months ago, I reported that the final Zodiac cypher had been cracked and the name of the killer revealed. And the name of the killer turned out to be someone suspected in the unsolved Black Dahlia murder. The general tone of my mention of this was "serious you guys, this is real." Well, it's not real. It's total bullshit. Sorry about that. I did two things: 1, I bought into something, a conspiracy theory really, because it was new and exciting. And 2, I allowed a self-declared "expert" to snow me over with his "expert" claims about solving ciphers, an alleged expertise I could not challenge because I know practically nothing about codebreaking. I remember being similarly swindled by self-declared "experts" babbling about "chromatic aberrations." (Although I didn't really buy into that, but I found it "interesting" and I wasn't strongly skeptical about it. Hey they said they're "experts," they must know that they're talking about, right?) I screwed up. It won't be the last time, I'm sure. TJM definitively ranks the films of Andrei Tarkovsky and explains the joys of discovering older movies over anticipating new ones. Podcast: In Wisconsin, the Dems steal an election from themselves, abortion is cheered in Massachusetts, Spain gets what it voted for, the economy is humming, and more! Recent Comments m: "w00t ..." m: "Pixy's up! ..." Skip: "Homo Sheepians ..." Publius Redux: "I am constantly amazed at the crap every generatio ..." m: ""wise man" (There's no "the" in there.) ..." publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb): " Homo sapiens means "man the wise". We named ou ..." Publius Redux: "Ah yes - The "because I want the result" theory of ..." m: "There're two publiuses on here at the same time! ..." publius, Rascally Mr. Miley (w6EFb): " Homo sapiens in essentially modern anatomical ..." tcn in AK: "Could not disagree more. Eratosthenes looked down ..." m: "402 Kitenji Action Jackson Posted by: Publius Red ..." tcn in AK: "Roberts is an ss. Posted by: Publius Redux at ..." Bloggers in Arms RI Red's Blog! Behind The Black CutJibNewsletter The Pipeline Second City Cop Talk Of The Town with Steve Noxon Belmont Club Chicago Boyz Cold Fury Da Goddess Daily Pundit Dawn Eden Day by Day (Cartoon) EduWonk Enter Stage Right The Epoch Times Grim's Hall Victor Davis Hanson Hugh Hewitt IMAO Instapundit JihadWatch Kausfiles Lileks/The Bleat Memeorandum (Metablog) Outside the Beltway Patterico's Pontifications The People's Cube Powerline RedState Reliapundit Viking Pundit WizBang Some Humorous Asides Kaboom! Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty.* The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! 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What Does It Take to Make Soccer Exciting?