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November 04, 2005

Al Franken: Racist

112 employees over the years and only one of them was black?

And I bet he wasn't even a "real black," either, but some sort of step-n-fetchit Simple Sambo like Lieutenant Governor of Maryland Michael Steele.

So, really, that's about one quarter of a real black. Meaning that Al Franken's black-hire rate is 1 out of 448, or just above 0.02%. Jesus, I bet the Klan has a better black-outreach program than that. The Klan must hire a few blacks, at least for ringers for its touch-football games against the Aryan Nation. (Oh, wait, it's racist to note that lithe black guys make really fast cornerbacks.)

Oh, and here's the kicker: he's suing the author of a book for revealing this. He's not claiming it's false, mind you; he seems to be making some sort of invasion-of-privacy beef.

Al Franken

Black folks just don't have the "necessities" to serve as his employees.

Thanks to Right Wing Howler.

Speaking of Cornerbacks... I'm a big fan of football jokes. (Which is weird, because I hate jokes per se. I guess I mean I like football witicisms.)

My favorite is about Jerome Bettis: "When you need one yard, he'll get you three. And when you need five yards... he'll get you three."

No offense to the Bus, and yeah, I know he breaks it for 12 or 15 every once in a while. But the basics of the joke are true. He's a dependable three yards.

But I heard one a couple of weeks ago, after a cornerback let an easy interception go right through his hands. "Well," the color man noted, "like they say, 'If he could catch, he'd be a receiever.'"

Great Al Franken Joke: I mean, it's about Al Franken. Al Franken himself has precious few jokes.

At some roast, someone said: "Al Franken is to comedy what Albert Einstein... is to comedy."

Pretty much sums it up.

posted by Ace at 03:49 PM

Comments

Hey, come on. Be nice to Al. After the dems lost the election last year, he didn't cry on camera and for that I am truly grateful.

Posted by: on November 4, 2005 04:56 PM

Franken is a vile dwarf.

Posted by: rk on November 4, 2005 05:06 PM

Al resists hiring blacks 'cause he sees himself (and only himself) as the true Soul Man. Shudder!

Posted by: Nickie Goomba on November 4, 2005 05:15 PM

I take umbrage at that roast comment. Actually, Albert Einstein is a pretty funny guy.

Posted by: utron on November 4, 2005 05:18 PM

The left believes that black people are for show but only white people can make an organization go.

Conservatives believe black people are people.

Posted by: Jake on November 4, 2005 07:13 PM

Al Franken is a good man...........

He don't beat his negroes.

Posted by: sqlserver on November 4, 2005 07:46 PM

Mr Franken don't have no uppity negroes like
Condi or Clarence or Sambo er Steele.

His negroes know their place.

Posted by: sqlserver on November 4, 2005 08:05 PM

I think that Albert Einstein's progeny have a cause of action for slander (or libel).

Posted by: Matt on November 4, 2005 08:14 PM

And by the way me and Andy R. are not racist because
we call the colored's negros instead of "african american"

Posted by: sqlserver on November 4, 2005 08:31 PM

Will AL SHARPTON and JESSIE JACKASSON as well as the NAACP be demanding a appology from freaky franken? will they be demanding he resign? dont expect it since freaky franken is a liberal

Posted by: spurwing plover on November 4, 2005 09:05 PM

Actually, Albert Einstein is a pretty funny guy.

Actually, I don't find Albert Einstein to be funny at all. You may find a slowly rotting corpse funny, but then there's no accounting for taste. On the other hand though, I will agree that even in his advanced state of decomposition, Einstein is still funnier than Franken.

Posted by: kbiel on November 4, 2005 09:29 PM

"Will AL SHARPTON and JESSIE JACKASSON as well as the NAACP be demanding a appology from freaky franken? will they be demanding he resign? dont expect it since freaky franken is a liberal"

How clever of you Spurwing to answer your own question.

Posted by: JannyMae on November 4, 2005 09:46 PM

As the buck-toothed moron himself would probably say, "You're a big fat lying liar doodyhead!"

So there.

Posted by: zetetic on November 4, 2005 10:41 PM

I don't think Jesse is too particular about who he shakes down for "contributions" -- he's running a racket not a movement. The race hustling is just for show.

Posted by: on November 5, 2005 09:15 AM

If he were alive today ALBERT EINSTEIN would be flunked becuase he got all the answers right

Posted by: spurwing plover on November 5, 2005 11:14 PM

Whydya always gotta attack JOOOOOOS like Franken, buddy? Whyncha attack sombody other than JOOOOOOOOOOS, OK? Its always JOOOOOOS, JOOOOOOOOS, JOOOOOOOOOOS with you guys.

Ain't there any shiksas in that book you could trash? Any shgotzim? Any goyim at all? Any Amalekites? Any Canaanites? Any shvartzes? Just JOOOOOOOS like Franken? Thats all you got in that book, JOOOOOOOS? Well, I think you are A JOOOOOOO-hater -- an anti-semite, that's what you are.

Posted by: Big Bill on November 6, 2005 10:53 PM

Oh, and here's the kicker: he's suing the author of a book for revealing this. He's not claiming it's false, mind you; he seems to be making some sort of invasion-of-privacy beef.

Where does Franken think he is, England? And who does he think he is, George Galloway?

Posted by: Tongueboy on November 7, 2005 09:35 AM

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Mayor Karen is so stung by fan-made AI ads that she's resorting to the shitlibs' go-to demand for an end to criticism -- these ads are "violent" and "hateful" and making me feel unsafe because one video showed AI cartoons throwing tomatoes at me and the tomatoes looked like blood when they squished
This was her actual complaint. The mushed-up tomato looked like blood so it's a death threat and these violent attacks on me must stop. What is dis bitch, CNN?

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MacDonald's old partner Adam Egot revealed that MacDonald repurposed a bit with one of his ventriloquist dolls -- that he was a "bad guy" who "didn't believe the Holocaust happened" -- for the Norm MacDonald show, in which he claimed Egot didn't believe in the Holocaust.

Funniest thing I've read about the Virginia mess. Back when they were hustling the referendum through the assembly both Senators, Warner and Kaine, advised them to go slow and play by the rules. Louise Lucas said she respected them but didn't need advice from the "cuck chair" in the corner. The gerrymandering was overturned and Louise is heading for the big house. Edward G. Robinson voice "where's your cuck now?"
Posted by: Smell the Glove

I posted his post on twitter and it's gotten 25K views so far. Thanks, Smell the Glove

Chris
@chriswithans

"Ahhhhh ahh I put my career on the line for Louise Lucas and Jay Jones thinking they'd vault me into presidential contention and we ended up costing Democrats 20 House seats and unleashing a Reverse Dobbs ahhhhh ahhh"

Forgotten 80s Mystery Click That Sums Up the Democrat Communist Party Today
Something is wrong as I hold you near
Somebody else holds your heart, yeah
You turn to me with your icy tears
And then it's raining, feels like it's raining

TJM wonders about world building in stories, mostly The Hunger Games

"It's f**king f**ked."
-- reportedly a genuine comment offered by a "senior Labour source"
Correction: I wrote that Labour is losing 88% (now 87%) of the seats it is "defending." I think that's wrong. The right way to say it is the seats they are contesting -- that is, they don't necessarily already hold these seats, but they have put up a candidate to run for the seat. It's still very bad but not as bad as losing 87% of the seats they already held.

Basil the Great
@BasilTheGreat

🚨ED MILIBAND [a Minister in Starmer's government] SAYS KEIR STARMER WILL RESIGN AS PRIME MINISTER

He has reportedly reassured Labour MP's that Starmer will be resigning following the disastrous results tonight

It's over

"The end of the two party system in the UK" as first the Fake Conservatives and now Labour chooses political suicide rather than simply STOPPING THE INVASION
Incidentally, the only reason this didn't already happen in the US is because of the Very Bad Orange Man (who is right on 85% of all policy calls and extremely, existentially right on 15% of them)

No political party that is NOT also a doomsday religious cult would EVER choose a cataclysmic loss -- and possible extinction as a party -- to support a toxically unpopular favoritism of NON-CITIZEN ILLEGAL MIGRANTS over actual citizen voters.

Only a cult does this.

Now they've lost 84%.

Annunziata Rees-Mogg
@zatzi
If this continues Labour loses 2,148 seats tonight.

That is much worse than the worst case predictions I’ve seen.

Cataclysmic

Update: They've now lost 88% of the seats they're defending. As I mentioned earlier, I think I heard that London will not bail them out, as many of those Labour seats will probably flip to "Muslim Independent" or Green. Detroit's 5am vote will not save them.

Yup, Labour is losing 80% of its seats...

The British Patriot
@TheBritLad

🚨 BREAKING: Labour have lost 80% of all seats contested as of 2:25 AM.<
br> If this continues, Keir Starmer will be out of office next week.

Reform has surged and projected to pick up between 1700-2100 seats.

Wow, up to 1700-2100 seats. It's not incredible that this is happening. It's incredible that the Davos crowd is so absolutely determined to privilege Muslim "migrants" over the actual native population who elects them, no matter how loudly the natives scream that they want to be prioritized, that they will gladly self-extinguish as a party rather than simply representing the interests of their own voters. Astonishing.
Remember, when they call other people "cultists" -- they are the ones so imprisoned in their social reinforcement and discipline bubbles that they will choose political death rather than dare upset the Karen Enforcement Officers of their cult.
Update: Now they've lost 83% of the seats they were defending.

(((Dan Hodges)))
@DPJHodges

Reform are basically wiping Labour out in the North. It's not a defeat. It's not even a rout. Labour are simply ceasing to exist.

Nick Lowles
@lowles_nick

Tonight’s results are calamitous for Labour. Not just for Keir Starmer's leadership, but for the very future of the party

STARMERGEDDON: In early returns, Reform gains 135 seats, Labour loses 90, the Fake Conservatives lose 36 (and I didn't even know they could fall any further), the Lib Dems lose 4, and the Greens gain 6. Note that the only other party gaining seats is the Greens and they're only gaining a handful of seats.
Update: Reform now up 145, Labour down 98.
Labour projected to lose Wales -- where they've ruled for 27 years.
Fulton County Georgia just discovered 400 boxes of ballots for Labour
Update: REF +156, LAB -107, CON -45
Brutal: In four out of five council seats where Labour is defending, they've lost. 80%.
I'm sure it's not this simple, but Reform is straight taking Labour's and the "Conservatives'" seats. They've lost almost exactly what Reform gained. If understand this right (and warning, I probably don't), all of London's council seats are up for election, and Labour might lose hugely there, as their old voters abandon them for Reform, Muslim Indenpendents, and the Greens.
REF +190, LAB -134, CON -56.

Updates on the Labour collapse in council elections -- which wags are calling #Starmergeddon -- from Beege Welborne. There are about 5000 seats up for grabs, Labour is expected to lose 1,800, Reform will probably gain 1,580, up from... zero. So this would be more than that.
People claim that while Labour has adopted the Sharia Agenda to appeal to the million Muslims it allowed to migrate to the country, those voters are ditching Labour to vote for the Muslim Independent Party or the Greens. Delicious. This shadenfreude is going straight to my thighs.
Oh, and if Starmer loses about as badly as expected, Labour will toss him out of a window Braveheart style and replace him. He will announce he is resigning to spend more time with his Gay Ukrainian Male Prostitutes.

Media bias and senationalism are as old as, well, the media:

That was written by Denny O'Neill and illustrated by, get this, Frank Miller. Editor to the Stars Jim Shooter was in charge at the time.
I always thought the gag was original to the comic book, but in fact the "Threat or Menace" headline was a satirical joke about media bias and sensationalism for a long while. The Harvard Lampoon used it in a parody of Life magazine: "Flying Saucers: Threat or Menace?"

Hamas is Humiliating Trump's 'Board of Peace'
[Hat Tip: TC] [CBD]

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