I don't think I want to install this on my work machine so can somebody tell me how you would say "Michael, blow me" in pirate talk?

Naargh! Yer be given' me full value mateys or ye be feedin' the sharks! I be the only importan' one on the deck, me shwabies!

Arrgh! Where be Joe?

I don't think I want to install this on my work machine so can somebody tell me how you would say "Michael, blow me" in pirate talk?

"Hello" usually works for me.

No Ace, in Pirate not normal everyday conversation.

Narrgh, Mikey matey, shiver me timber like a good whore.

AAAAaaaaaaarggggh!

"Hello" usually works for me.

lol! Of course. What was I thinking?

Um, I LIKED Joe Millionaire II. It was like Plan 9 from Outer Space, only with 100% more Euro-skank goodness.

Yarr, I be the dread pirate Steve! Garrr! Joe's be the only place for me!

rinkworks.com has a dialectizer that will translate text or even websites to Jive, Redneck, Cockney, Swedish Chef and a few others.
The Book-a-minute is pretty good too.

From some undergroundy-type '70s comic that I'll attempt here to dredge up from memory:

Pirate 1: How old are ye mate?
Pirate 2: Old enough to quaff cup after cup of this here grog!
Pirate 1: Just tryin' to strike some gentle conversation. Mind if I fondle your tool?
Pirate 2: It's ungodly big, wanna see it?
{Aforementioned tool is flopped out}
Pirate 1: By thunder, what a whopper!
Pirate 2: Biggest on board this here ship. When I pop it fills buckets. Want a taste?
Pirate 1: Don't mind if I do.
{draws his sword and lops it off at the root}
Snikt!!
Pirate 2: Ugghh!!
Pirate 1: The head tastes best!

i don't get it

i don't get it

The risk I take sharing humor from an MIT frat.

Damn... MIT humor, that's too sophisticated for someone from utexas.

MIT humor, that's too sophisticated for someone from utexas.

Not so much sophisticated as completely whacked-out quirky and usually impenetrable by the better-adjusted masses.

Geoff, the "artist" for that little masterpiece was S. Clay Wilson. I remember seeing that circulating around my school when I was in fifth grade, which probably explains a lot about the subsequent development of my personality.

Thanks utron, both for the catch and reassuring me that it wasn't monsters from the Id.

somebody tell me how you would say "Michael, blow me" in pirate talk?

Don't know exactly but have a feeling that Thar she blows would have to fit in there somewhere.

Not really sure how this works, but this plugin takes plaintext and turns it into pirate talk.

{draws his sword and lops it off at the root}

This is incorrect. If I remember correctly, the, uh, member was lopped off just back of the tip.

I can't believe I know this stuff. Zap Comics. S. Clay Wilson. Cap'n Pissgums and His Pervert Pirates. The shame of my misspent youth. Wilson was probably the most perverse illustrator of the lot. He had another character named The Checkered Demon who pretty twisted, too. I wonder what Mr. Wilson's been up to lately. Or maybe I don't want to know...

Arrr!

Thanks, guys. The last thing I need to be doing is looking up useless information on the Internet.

But of course I had to check up on his S. Clay Wilson person that you old geeks are mentioning.

Well, I learned something today.

Arr,Matey

Continued

Wilson is an interesting character.
Yes, he is still alive at age 64. Wilson lives in San Francisco.

Here's a link of Wilson getting interviewed by someone convinced that S. Clay is an artiste of the avant garde sort.
http://www.sonic.net/~goblin/8wilson.html

Bart:

S. Clay Wilson was a contemporary of R. Crumb - if you haven't heard of him or of Vaughn Bode, run, don't walk to an underground comics shop and treat yourself.

Geez, what a bunch of boomers. I cannot believe I'm here at Ace's and people are discussing the alternative comic artists of my youth, very weird.

I could never stand Wilson, too disgusting. Bode OTOH drew some excellent and depressing sci-fi books.

Vaughn Bode hanged himself, didn't he? Possibly accidentally, if I recall correctly, in an auto-erotic rope harness gone horribly wrong.

I traded an email recently with M.K. Brown (warning: website plays an annoying sound effect), my favorite underground artist of the period. She has a terribly small output for somebody who was around for so long, though she had a near miss shot at fame: Doctor N!Godatu was the other animated series that ran on the Tracy Ullman show.