The fact that I made honorable mention is (a) extremely flattering, and (b) pretty conclusive proof that Hawkins was baked when he wrote that.

As Han said to Luke: "Don't get cocky, kid."

The fact that I made honorable mention is (a) extremely flattering, and (b) pretty conclusive proof that Hawkins was baked when he wrote that.

Allah, you were great. In fact, you got me hooked on this shit, which is why I now hang around Ace's moronblog.

Hmm. Fuck you.

I, too, loved your blog (and the schtick) even before the photoshopping era. Ace ought to have 'Kufr Corner' where you could do a little guest column.

Well, I think I've said it before, but of course Allah is always welcome to post here.

It's a weird offer to make, given that he has a blog, but... just saying, he can post here under a different name if he likes.

I guess saying that sort of scotches the point of being anonymous here.

No friggin' way Ann Coulter beats PJ O'Rourke.

No friggin' way Ann Coulter beats Ace.

Agreed, Ann Coulter belongs under Ace.

wait.

you said that on purpose

Yeah.

think ya so sneaky. feh.

Now all you have to do is dump that "guest blogger" shit and go back to All Ace All The Time. Then you'll be perfect.

Do not argue with me! I have spoken!

Am I the only when who thinks Andrea has more testosterone that anyone on this site?

Damn. I wish I would read before I post.

when = one

that = than

Slice like a fuckin' hammer.

Wait, you're just one spot above Frank J.?

That sounds like an insult.

You deserve the props. This morning's post, 'They'll "Modify" Crescent of Embrace "Memorial"' was brilliant.

Coulter strikes me as being a bit physically fragile. She gets on top as a courtesy. Plus if threatened her tongue alone can strip a man to the bone in less than a minute. So, courtesy and self-preservation.

I'm shocked that this ranking of right-of-center writers left Andrew Sullivan out.

. . .

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Sorry, just had to get that out of my system.

Congrats, Ace-- you're closer to P.J. O'Rourke than I've ever gotten. Well, since the restraining order and all.

Cheers,
Dave at Garfield Ridge

Watching a story on CNN that is simply too stupid to be believed. "Katrina Catastrope: Hollywood speaks out about reporters getting emotional."

The entire story consisted of celebrities praising reporters for crying and showing emotion during their reports. It was a virtual orgy of self-congratulatory bull.

I checked out CNN's site and found an interview with Anne Rice.My favorite quote?

"It is a cataclysm. It's something like the destruction of the city of Pompeii," she said in an interview to air Friday night on "Paula Zahn Now."

Yeah, I see the similarities.

Mark Steyn f'n rules! (Oh yeah; good job, Ace.)

Ann Coulter was a token pick!

CYBER SEXISM!! IT'S EVERYWHERE!!!!!

Yeah, I don't think I'd like to read about Ann Coulter's days off. (Read what the list is about.) I don't think she fits in that list.

Still, to be on a list with P.J. O'Rourke is pretty cool.

Note the rules: "most entertaining three page essay about what he/she did on his/her last day off."

Obviously Ace is going to have an advantage there, what with all the D&D tournaments and masturbation and what-not.

I certainly concur that Ace can flat-out write some funny stuff, if asked who could really spin a yarn about their day off, my vote goes to Iowahawk.

Granted, the guy lives the knucklehead dream life while Ace rolls fantasy dice and plays card games with Vietnamese kids on the Web. It's hardly a fair criteria and if the subject were to be, say, how to get chicks in bed I'm pretty sure Ace could knock out funnier, if more humiliating, copy.

But no shit, Iowahawk might get up tomorrow, get baked, grab his beautiful wife and ride his moped backwards to a Hells Angel rally, then drink himself into oblivion and fight about 7 crank dealers from the Racine chapter of the Death Jokers all by himself.

Then maybe he'd go home, romance the beautiful wife, build a perfect retro treehouse for his perfect kids, drink a bottle of tequila, prepare a 3-course meal while beating away a push-in home invader and sacrificing him on a makeshift, though historically accurate, Inca altar he built in the woods behind the railroad tracks.

Then he'd sit down and knock out a tremedously insulting Leftist parody that pissed off thread after thread of Kos and DU lunatics, romance the bride once again and fall asleep chuckling.

It's like he's Paul Bunyan and Mark Twain rolled up into one hipster! Nobody could expect Ace or anybody else on that list to write about weekends like this guy has.

How humiliating. I knock out a virtual slobberjob to the guy just in time to post under him. Please know it took me about 20 minutes to put that hummer together, which is even longer than the last blowjob I gave the guy.

By no means did I intend to lionize him to his face. I figured he was on a Phillipines sex junket or something.

Monday is talk like a pirate day!

http://talklikeapirateday.com/

Spongey, we'll always have Paris. And that night at the Central Park boathouse.

Now if you'll excuse me, there are a few midget Filipina pleasure girls that need my attention.

Look, I don't want to turn this into some big contest between Iowahawk and me, except to say that I'm better.

Iowahawk does a nice job with his little spoofs and funny make-'em-ups. But we're talking writing skill here.

RWN says so. F Iowahawk.

No way Coulter beats Lileks. Lileks may fool you for a few days with throwaway Bleats about Chuck E. Cheese and Jasper, but when he's on, he's on.

And on the essay topic of "What He Did On His Day Off", I'm pretty confident the words "Matt Drudge" and "bullwhip" wouldn't appear in it. At least not in the same sentence. *

I think Jeff Goldstein belongs on the list, too, but given his feud with Hawkins, that wasn't going to happen.

P.J. is a legend, but does he still write? I never see his work anymore, and fear he's becoming a right-wing Hunter S. Thompson.

I'd also add Iowahawk and Vanderleun to the list. And Kim du Toit, when he's on a rampage.

*Kidding.

Yeah, let's be honest. The fact that I ain't on that list completely invalidates it.

I mean, it just does.

Sorry, but somebody has to speak truth to power here.

JeffG:

You were probably the reference for the list, since it seems like you're always writing about your leisure time (conversations with your deadbeat neighbor, your pants, various fruits and whatnot).