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August 05, 2005

Is It Real or Is It Scrappleface?

Sudan Rape Victims Get Free Copy of UN Report

(2005-07-29) -- In another display of the value of the United Nations, Secretary-General Kofi Annan today announced that women brutally raped by Sudanese government forces would each receive a free copy of the latest report documenting the widespread, savage abuse.
"It legitimizes their suffering and lets them know that they are not alone," said Mr. Annan, as he held aloft a copy of the 29-page report. "This is why the United Nations is so desperately needed in today's world. We will continue to take bold action in producing reports on the rape and abuse of Sudanese women. The U.N. exists to fearlessly monitor tragic violence against oppressed people by government forces in our U.N. member states."

Environmental activist and general pain-in-the-ass Sting immediately announced plans for a "LiveRape" concert, to better inform Sudanese women about the rapes they are experiencing on a daily basis.

Slated to perform: "Stinky."

Thanks to Fat Kid.

Sorry For The Confusion: This actually is Scrappleface, not real.

The headline was meant to suggest that it's hard to tell the difference.

But please be aware the quotes are all fake.

posted by Ace at 01:59 PM

Comments

yeah, it's a crappy gig. but it's a gig.

Posted by: Dave in Sudan on August 5, 2005 02:14 PM

"This is why the United Nations is so desperately needed in today's world. We will continue to take bold action in producing reports on the rape and abuse of Sudanese women.

"bold action in producing reports" ??? Is it just me or do the words bold action and report not belong together?

Silly me, I thought bold action might be something like putting UN peacekeeper troops into Sudan to STOP THE MUTHERFUCKERS FROM RAPING AND KILLING IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACE!!!

Posted by: 72 dogs on August 5, 2005 02:55 PM

Why does Kofi think he needs to defend the existance of the UN? I thought American conservatives were the only knuckle dragging mouth breathers in the world who thought the UN was a sham.

Posted by: Dacotti on August 5, 2005 03:31 PM

I guess everyone missed the joke.

Posted by: fat kid on August 5, 2005 03:47 PM

Lesson #1: Check the link address before going apeshit.

Posted by: Dogstar on August 5, 2005 03:49 PM

Thanks Dogstar.

The one thing I've learned from my experiences blogging (and on Fark), is you've got to do your own friggin research. Whether it be passing along hoax emails, or spreading rumors, or whatever - trust, but verify is the name of the game.

Posted by: fat kid on August 5, 2005 04:41 PM

"Whether it be passing along hoax emails, or spreading rumors, or whatever - trust, but verify is the name of the game'

This from the guy who put up the tub girl link :) I still have nightmares about that!

Posted by: BrewFan on August 5, 2005 04:48 PM

LOLOL - you coulda googled "tub girl" to see wth i was talkin about - or even bounced it off wikipedia to see it listed under "shock sites" - hehe.

Regardless, that's one of the better zingers out there. The ongoing argument is between it and goatse. The Gov't actually took goatse offline - LMFAO - classic.

Posted by: fat kid on August 5, 2005 05:44 PM

Goatse is gone?

*frantically googling*

Posted by: Michael on August 5, 2005 09:08 PM

I admit to having no idea what goatse is. I also have no desire to know :)

Posted by: BrewFan on August 5, 2005 09:58 PM

"I admit to having no idea what goatse is. I also have no desire to know "

Just as well, Brewfan. Once you've been there, you'll never be the same.

Posted by: Michael on August 6, 2005 12:16 AM

If it's the three old guys, then let's just say it's three old guys, and let it go at that.

Posted by: Dogstar on August 6, 2005 12:23 AM