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August 04, 2005
Young Boys Wankdorf erection reliefUhh, that's ESPN's headline. What does it mean? Well, first of all it means I'm going to get a couple of dozen more hits from Google today. Second of all, it means that someone at ESPN set out to write the gayest sports headline ever, concerning a How will ESPN top this? It'll be tough. But I'm tipped their next story will be: Raging Penis Sweetboys Fondle Nutsacks Turgid Dorkwand Throbbing Funmuscle Jm J. Bullock Thanks to Tim. posted by Ace at 02:06 PM
CommentsJesus, that is funny Posted by: lauraw on August 4, 2005 02:11 PM
Dorkwand Throbbing Funmuscle You are a strange person ACE OF SPADES, where do you get this shit? Bratpack festivals? But the ACE OF SPADES always brings the funny of six mortal bloggers1 Posted by: 72 Dorkwands on August 4, 2005 02:12 PM
I bet the follow up article examines the Wankdorf Young Boy's petition to have the game renamed from "soccer" to "suckhim". Posted by: Jack M. on August 4, 2005 02:17 PM
Ummm. The team is in Switzerland, not Germany. Posted by: CUS on August 4, 2005 02:20 PM
Pff! Switzerland, Germany. Like there's a difference. Where there's a Wankdorf, hilarity ensues. Posted by: S. Weasel on August 4, 2005 02:43 PM
wow. LOL Posted by: brak on August 4, 2005 02:44 PM
It says it's an al- Reuters wire story. So who came up with the headline? Posted by: Richard on August 4, 2005 02:51 PM
Wow, this is amazing. I passed the headline to everyone I know. Posted by: Greg on August 4, 2005 03:14 PM
Hmmmm.... Has Tim been to my blog? Posted by: Rightwingsparkle on August 4, 2005 03:52 PM
And the Young Boys had to "shake off" their image - OMG, this is just too funny! Posted by: Tim Mi on August 4, 2005 04:13 PM
I'm waiting for "Viagra Stiffs Palmeiro: Hard Choices Ahead" Posted by: Chrees on August 4, 2005 04:34 PM
Get ready for a stampede of disappointed pedophiles, ace. Posted by: Sean M. on August 4, 2005 04:53 PM
the gayest ESPN headline ever was in 1999. a colorado university basketball player named Tyron Manlove was dismissed from the team. Headline: "No More Manlove in Colorado Locker Room" Posted by: mps on August 4, 2005 05:22 PM
I wonder if the headline wasn't writen by a Brit? Their "sophisticated sense of humour" (they love their extra 'u's) always leads to that kind of thing. Posted by: jic on August 5, 2005 10:12 AM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
I wonder if he was fearless. I wonder if he was scared. I wonder if he just did it anyway?-- Mike Rowe
Low-T High-Calorie Potato Brian Stelter: "Matthew Dowd is no longer an MSNBC political analyst, according to a network source."
Matt Dowd, former Disney Groomer Corporation Political Director and John McCain advisor (of course), is the one who blamed Charlie Kirk's shooting on the real assassin, Charlie Kirk, claiming that Charlie's "hateful words lead to hateful actions."
Trump speaks about the "heinous assassination" of Charlie Kirk, notes the left relentlessly demonized him until they radicalized an assassin to kill him
"For years, the radical left has compared wonderful Americans like Charlie to NAZlS... this type of language is DIRECTLY RESPONSIBLE for the terrorism we're seeing in our country today.
Argentinian PM Javier Millei: "The left is always, at all times and places, a violent phenomenon full of hatred."
I disregard their hate. It's the violence that we object to. And we will begin objecting to it with force.
Update: Kash Patel says the person of interest has been interrogated and then released. Wrong guy, I guess.
But as the hours pass without a real suspect, and with the FBI apparently interrogating uninvolved people, I begin to fear the assassin has escaped. I mean, they don't seem to be following a breadcrumb trail, they seem genuinely baffled.
Karol Sheinin: I can confirm the person of interest questioned by the FBI is Zachariah Ahmed Qureshi.
If this is the guy -- apparently he also interned at Heritage. Update: Source says he's been released? Wrong guy?
Fat-F*ck Pritzker blames Trump's rhetoric for the ramp up of political violence! May he rot in hell! [CBD]
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Broward County Officials Accused of Adding Over 100,000 Ineligible Voters to the Rolls It is too soon to know how it happened, but...Republicans are watching! And that is how it is done. [CBD]
Federal judge temporarily blocks Trump from firing Federal Reserve Gov Lisa Cook With absolutely nonsensical reasoning, but you already knew that. [CBD]
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James Varney: Reflecting on Hurricane Katrina twenty years later, and the partisan uses Democrats found for it
There was fear aplenty. But the truth is, a lot of the panic Americans saw on television was performative. The throngs of people along Convention Center Boulevard sat patiently in the broiling weather, five or six deep in folding chairs on the sidewalk, waiting for something, someone, to arrive. Then, a television crew or photographer would show up, and people would pour into the street, falling on their knees, screaming and gesticulating to the camera. It was an awful situation, obviously, but when the camera wasn't on them, it was remarkable how patient and orderly everyone was.
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: the most repetitive but catchy earworm of the eighties?
Sometimes, I find you doubt my love for you but I don't mind Why should I mind? Why should I mind? It's hard to quote the song while avoiding quoting from the endlessly-repeated chorus. Wait, my mistake, his other hit from 1985 was the most repetitive new wave hit of the 80s.
David French Is Aggressively and Persistently Dishonorable, But Fortunately He's Also Really Bad At It
Here's a solid beating of the execrable French! [CBD]
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click
I'm gonna get high, man, I'm gonna get loose/ Need me a triple shot of that juice ![]()
I guess yesterday's Starship test flight was cancelled. They're counting down to another launch, NOW. Lift-off!
The "hip" gray corporate slop era of Cracker Barrel is put on hold (supposedly):
Bret Baier
Elric the Blade says he's no longer sure that Trump will have the right to appeal in the NY fraud case:
Yesterday, I thought that Trump had an appeal as of right on the fraud liability, based upon news reports that cited the second opinion as declining to find in favor of liability. That would give Trump at least 2 dissenting judges for an appeal as of right. But now, after seeing the actual decisions, I'm not so sure. Sorry, guys. I've never seen or heard of what the second opinion did. They dissented, but ... decided not to dissent? I'm not sure what the effect is in terms of whether Trump has a right to appeal. I doubt anyone does. I think even if Trump doesn't have a right of appeal, the Court of Appeals (NY's highest court) will take the case. But ... it's a liberal court so who knows how they'll rule. I don't think they'll take the appeal. Judges are lazy and cowardly and will duck any hot potato case they can. These judges are also liberal hacks, and do not want to deliver Trump a full victory. Recent Comments
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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