Ace of Spades HQ

« What, Is Connie Chung In Control Somewhere? | Main | Doctor vs. Doctor [John from WuzzaDem] »

June 11, 2005

The Scientology Interview [John from WuzzaDem]

From AP:

Tom Cruise says girlfriend Katie Holmes "digs" the Church of Scientology. In an interview with Entertainment Weekly, Cruise says the 26-year-old "Batman Begins" actress is curious about Scientology, founded by L. Ron Hubbard.
He also confirmed there was a Scientology massage tent on the set of his upcoming film, "War of the Worlds."

"I also had a cappuccino tent on that set. And I made sure the crews were fed well, too. And if someone wanted an assist from a (Scientology) volunteer, it was there for them," he says. "People are curious about it - they're always asking me about it, they want to know what Scientology is."

I've heard the comparisons of Scientology to "cults," complete with lurid tales of kidnapping and brainwashing, but I'm sure a lot of this is part exaggeration, and part sensationalism.

I wanted to find out what kind of impression the crew members on the set of Cruise's film got when they spoke to these Scientology "volunteers." I managed to find one who would talk to me. Of course, he insisted on anonymity, so his name has been changed. I spoke with "Glen" in his home yesterday.

John
So what was it like working with Tom Cruise?

Glen
It was great. He's a very cool guy. No airs, he treats everybody the same. Definitely not your typical "big star," if you know what I mean.

John
Now, I understand you spoke to one of the Scientology volunteers who was on the set. How did they explain the basic philosophy behind the religion? Glen? Are you OK?

Glen
Yes. I am fine.

John
You just look a little...dazed, and your eyes are all glassy.

Glen
Scientology has changed my life. I have never been more happy or aware of myself and my surroundings. Here is a pamphlet. It will change your life.

John
Thanks. I want to ask you about...

Glen
Why don't we read from Dianetics together - it will change your life.

John
Not right now, I really...

Glen
Here, you can have my copy. You must come to the meeting Saturday night. It will change your life.

John
I appreciate the offer, but I'm busy Saturday night...

Glen
Then we will have the meeting on Sunday. You really must come.

John
Thanks, but I really don't want a copy. Listen, are you sure you're all right? You're acting a little, I don't know...weird.

Glen
No, no, I am fine. I am just really excited about Scientology. Look how excited I am.

[Starts jumping up and down on the couch, pumping his fist in the air]

John
Hey, be careful, man!

Glen
WHOOO! I am psyched! I have never felt like this before in my life! I can't wait to achieve Clear!

John
Look out!

[Glen falls off the couch, hits his head on the coffee table and falls to the floor, unconcious]

John
Hey, are you OK? Glen?

Glen [Slowly opens his eyes]
What happened?

John
You don't remember?

Glen [Gets up and sits back on the couch]
No, the last thing I remember is you asking me about Tom Cruise. I must have blacked out or something.

John
Do you want me to call a doctor?

Glen
No, I'm OK now, but I really don't feel up to answering any more questions. I've got a pounding headache.

John
That's perfectly understandable. Maybe we can talk about Scientology some other time.

[Glen's body stiffens, his eyes glaze over as he stares straigh ahead]

Glen
No, I would like to talk to you about Scientology. Here is a copy of Dianetics. It will change your life.

John
You're kidding. What about your headache?

Glen
It is psychosomatic. I much achieve Clear, then I will not experience headaches.

John
Yeah...well, I, uh, I'm actually late for an appointment, so I have to go.

Glen
You should come to the meeting Saturday. It will change your life.

John [Walking out the door]
Yeah, whatever, see you later.

Glen
Wait! Take this pamphlet! It will change your life!!

[Posted by John from WuzzaDem.com]

Update: Sobek lands an interview with Cruise himself, and gets into a bit of a sculffle with a few other interesting characters. Funny stuff, man.

[On his personal computer]

[As opposed to his Cray supercomputer]

posted by Ace at 03:40 PM

Comments

Scientology is a fraud.

You must take the EST training, though - it will change your life! Truly, you must come to the sharing meeting...Werner Earhard is god, except that we are all god, but Werner is aware of it - come to the meeting ....(wipes drool off chin).

Posted by: ib1netmon on June 11, 2005 04:16 PM

The scheme in Scientology, from what I understand, is that they find introspective people and get them to share their secrets (like, say, being gay). Once they do, the Scientologists hold the secrets over them should they ever want to leave. They also tie money to enlightenment. You have to pass through various levels, each more expensive than the next.

Posted by: Karol on June 11, 2005 04:50 PM

I worked with someone once who worked a part-time job every night as "payment" to work "up the ranks".

20-30 hours a week as payment. Expensive religion.

Posted by: John from WuzzaDem on June 11, 2005 05:55 PM

You know, reading a lot of right-wing sites (like Ace's) I see a common thread:

Leftists are criticized because they believe the worst about pro-America sources. They're firecely skeptical of the government, the military and, of course, anyone who might favor the US. And yet, that skepticism vanishes when it comes to listening to anti-American sources.

I respectfully submit that y'all are doing the same thing with Scientology. You're granting all credibility to anti-Scientologists and none to Scientology and active Scientologists, even when what is said is patently ridiculous, indefensible or simply not very extraordinary.

For example, the claim that they find introspective people and coax their secrets out. This is called "confession", proverbially considered to be "good for the soul".

Ah, but then, they extort people into staying. No way to defend against that claim, is there? (There is, but you'd have to grant some credibility to the hundreds of thousands of active Scientologists.)

And then there's the money. Every church takes donations. Many churches require them (LDS, for example). Scientology's heinous crime here apparently is exchanging services for money.

Never mind that you can check materials out of the public library, attend free services on Sunday, and probably every night of the week, and get help setting up a group where you can give each other services for free, the fact that you have to pay for any service, no matter how much of the Church's resources are consumed by it.

Anyway, enjoying the guest-blogging. Keep up the good work.

Posted by: Long time reader, first time responder on June 11, 2005 08:07 PM

Look out, it's one of them Scientologists!

Posted by: Paranoid Right-Winger on June 11, 2005 08:31 PM

Right. 'cause only one of them brain-washed Scientologists could suggest examining the subject fairly.

Posted by: Long time reader, first time responder on June 11, 2005 10:34 PM

Ignore 'em "Long Time." Don't let the Thetan's get you down.

Posted by: Xenu on June 11, 2005 10:51 PM

Dude, Thetans are our rightful overlords! I recommend tightening your tinfoil hat. That blocks the bad thoughts from your head.

Posted by: Enas Yorl on June 11, 2005 11:09 PM

Thetans are our rightful overloards!

HERETIC! The body Thetan's abound in thee! For your blasphemy, you are utterly and inescapabley fated to be cast into the Space Volcano of Yorg-Sintch 9!

[Today's special: Space Volcano Dispensations. $2500. 2 for $4500 - buy one for a friend! Don't your loved ones deserve Space Volcano peace of mind?]

Posted by: Xenu on June 11, 2005 11:38 PM

Amazon.com Widgets

Now Available!
The Deplorable Gourmet
A Horde-sourced Cookbook
[All profits go to charity]

Top Headlines

Few people remember that Norm MacDonald began his career as a ventriloquist
MacDonald's old partner Adam Egot revealed that MacDonald repurposed a bit with one of his ventriloquist dolls -- that he was a "bad guy" who "didn't believe the Holocaust happened" -- for the Norm MacDonald show, in which he claimed Egot didn't believe in the Holocaust.

Funniest thing I've read about the Virginia mess. Back when they were hustling the referendum through the assembly both Senators, Warner and Kaine, advised them to go slow and play by the rules. Louise Lucas said she respected them but didn't need advice from the "cuck chair" in the corner. The gerrymandering was overturned and Louise is heading for the big house. Edward G. Robinson voice "where's your cuck now?"
Posted by: Smell the Glove

I posted his post on twitter and it's gotten 25K views so far. Thanks, Smell the Glove

Chris
@chriswithans

"Ahhhhh ahh I put my career on the line for Louise Lucas and Jay Jones thinking they'd vault me into presidential contention and we ended up costing Democrats 20 House seats and unleashing a Reverse Dobbs ahhhhh ahhh"

Forgotten 80s Mystery Click That Sums Up the Democrat Communist Party Today
Something is wrong as I hold you near
Somebody else holds your heart, yeah
You turn to me with your icy tears
And then it's raining, feels like it's raining

TJM wonders about world building in stories, mostly The Hunger Games

"It's f**king f**ked."
-- reportedly a genuine comment offered by a "senior Labour source"
Correction: I wrote that Labour is losing 88% (now 87%) of the seats it is "defending." I think that's wrong. The right way to say it is the seats they are contesting -- that is, they don't necessarily already hold these seats, but they have put up a candidate to run for the seat. It's still very bad but not as bad as losing 87% of the seats they already held.

Basil the Great
@BasilTheGreat

🚨ED MILIBAND [a Minister in Starmer's government] SAYS KEIR STARMER WILL RESIGN AS PRIME MINISTER

He has reportedly reassured Labour MP's that Starmer will be resigning following the disastrous results tonight

It's over

"The end of the two party system in the UK" as first the Fake Conservatives and now Labour chooses political suicide rather than simply STOPPING THE INVASION
Incidentally, the only reason this didn't already happen in the US is because of the Very Bad Orange Man (who is right on 85% of all policy calls and extremely, existentially right on 15% of them)

No political party that is NOT also a doomsday religious cult would EVER choose a cataclysmic loss -- and possible extinction as a party -- to support a toxically unpopular favoritism of NON-CITIZEN ILLEGAL MIGRANTS over actual citizen voters.

Only a cult does this.

Now they've lost 84%.

Annunziata Rees-Mogg
@zatzi
If this continues Labour loses 2,148 seats tonight.

That is much worse than the worst case predictions I’ve seen.

Cataclysmic

Update: They've now lost 88% of the seats they're defending. As I mentioned earlier, I think I heard that London will not bail them out, as many of those Labour seats will probably flip to "Muslim Independent" or Green. Detroit's 5am vote will not save them.

Yup, Labour is losing 80% of its seats...

The British Patriot
@TheBritLad

🚨 BREAKING: Labour have lost 80% of all seats contested as of 2:25 AM.<
br> If this continues, Keir Starmer will be out of office next week.

Reform has surged and projected to pick up between 1700-2100 seats.

Wow, up to 1700-2100 seats. It's not incredible that this is happening. It's incredible that the Davos crowd is so absolutely determined to privilege Muslim "migrants" over the actual native population who elects them, no matter how loudly the natives scream that they want to be prioritized, that they will gladly self-extinguish as a party rather than simply representing the interests of their own voters. Astonishing.
Remember, when they call other people "cultists" -- they are the ones so imprisoned in their social reinforcement and discipline bubbles that they will choose political death rather than dare upset the Karen Enforcement Officers of their cult.
Update: Now they've lost 83% of the seats they were defending.

(((Dan Hodges)))
@DPJHodges

Reform are basically wiping Labour out in the North. It's not a defeat. It's not even a rout. Labour are simply ceasing to exist.

Nick Lowles
@lowles_nick

Tonight’s results are calamitous for Labour. Not just for Keir Starmer's leadership, but for the very future of the party

STARMERGEDDON: In early returns, Reform gains 135 seats, Labour loses 90, the Fake Conservatives lose 36 (and I didn't even know they could fall any further), the Lib Dems lose 4, and the Greens gain 6. Note that the only other party gaining seats is the Greens and they're only gaining a handful of seats.
Update: Reform now up 145, Labour down 98.
Labour projected to lose Wales -- where they've ruled for 27 years.
Fulton County Georgia just discovered 400 boxes of ballots for Labour
Update: REF +156, LAB -107, CON -45
Brutal: In four out of five council seats where Labour is defending, they've lost. 80%.
I'm sure it's not this simple, but Reform is straight taking Labour's and the "Conservatives'" seats. They've lost almost exactly what Reform gained. If understand this right (and warning, I probably don't), all of London's council seats are up for election, and Labour might lose hugely there, as their old voters abandon them for Reform, Muslim Indenpendents, and the Greens.
REF +190, LAB -134, CON -56.

Updates on the Labour collapse in council elections -- which wags are calling #Starmergeddon -- from Beege Welborne. There are about 5000 seats up for grabs, Labour is expected to lose 1,800, Reform will probably gain 1,580, up from... zero. So this would be more than that.
People claim that while Labour has adopted the Sharia Agenda to appeal to the million Muslims it allowed to migrate to the country, those voters are ditching Labour to vote for the Muslim Independent Party or the Greens. Delicious. This shadenfreude is going straight to my thighs.
Oh, and if Starmer loses about as badly as expected, Labour will toss him out of a window Braveheart style and replace him. He will announce he is resigning to spend more time with his Gay Ukrainian Male Prostitutes.

Media bias and senationalism are as old as, well, the media:

That was written by Denny O'Neill and illustrated by, get this, Frank Miller. Editor to the Stars Jim Shooter was in charge at the time.
I always thought the gag was original to the comic book, but in fact the "Threat or Menace" headline was a satirical joke about media bias and sensationalism for a long while. The Harvard Lampoon used it in a parody of Life magazine: "Flying Saucers: Threat or Menace?"

Hamas is Humiliating Trump's 'Board of Peace'
[Hat Tip: TC] [CBD]

Tucker Carlson is pretty sure Trump is a wizard

Ted Turner Dies At 87 [CBD]

Podcast: Starting a new season, CBD and Sefton discuss their personal journeys to conservative principles, is Nick Shirley the beginning of a trend?, Iran trying to reignite the war, the Left attacks itself, even on "Best Guitarist" lists, and more!

TJM definitively ranks the films of Billy Wilder, like Some Like It Hot