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June 09, 2005

Heartbreaker (Beautiful Atrocities)

Dissolute wastrel Hannibal Gaddafi has appealed a 4 month suspended prison sentence for a February rampage in 2 Paris hotels in which he beat his pregnant girlfriend (sending her to the hospital), brandished an automatic pistol, barricaded himself in a room, & began smashing up the furniture. Hannibal, the youngest son of you-know-who, is something of a ladies man with quite a reputation in Europe. Aside from beating bodacious model Aline Skaf, Hannibal's other exploits include:

Copenhagen 2005: Violent incident at Libyan diplomat's residence in which police were called, but unable to intervene due to the building's diplomatic status.
Paris 2004: A drunken, incoherent Hannibal drove the wrong way down the Champs Elysees at 100mph in his black Porsche in the middle of the night. Once stopped, his thuggish bodyguards attacked French police & destroyed a police transmitter.
Rome 2003: Involved in brawl that sent 6 photographers to hospital
Rome 2001: Escorted to airport after brawl at Rome Hilton in which he attacked police with a fire extinguisher
Sardinia 2001: Thrown out of club for screaming at waiters, blocked the entrance to a disco with his Lamborghini, blasted music aboard his 70-ft yacht the Che Guevara, broadcast Muslim call to prayer over boat's PA system at dawn after long night of partying

Hannibal's equally upstanding siblings are:

posted by Ace at 07:22 PM

Comments

I can't believe his first name is really Hannibal.

Posted by: Zelda on June 9, 2005 07:59 PM

It's not. It's Motassim. I'm not sure if the nickname is for the general or the serial killer

Posted by: beautifulatrocities on June 9, 2005 08:04 PM

Why does the guerrilla fighter fight? We must come to the inevitable conclusion that the guerrilla fighter is a social reformer, that he takes up arms responding to the angry protest of the people against their oppressors, and that he fights in order to change the social system that keeps all his unarmed brothers in ignominy and misery...he also fights for the chance to have a big fuckin' yacht.

-Che Guevara, just before being shot

Posted by: Hubris on June 9, 2005 08:04 PM

It's just young Hanni engaging in a kind of Muslim version of rumspringa. He'll settle down soon enough to the 9 to 5 grind like the rest of us. Beat girlfriend at 10:00, destroy public property at 11:00, lunch at noon (beat waiter), and so on...

Posted by: planetmoron on June 9, 2005 09:23 PM

I would pay upwards of $1,000 to watch him fight Russell Crowe. I'm not even kidding.

Posted by: Robb on June 9, 2005 10:05 PM

My money is on Hannibal.

Q: Why is he appealing a suspended sentence??

Posted by: beautifulatrocities on June 9, 2005 10:52 PM

Is this the one who's shtupping Jorg Haider?

Posted by: See-Dubya on June 9, 2005 10:56 PM

Bah. Russel Crowe would wipe the floor with this drip.

Posted by: Andrea Harris on June 9, 2005 11:10 PM

VIRUS !!!!!!!! VIRUS!!!!!!!!

The link to the Aline Skaaf site has a Trojan Horse virus that automatically downloads to your computer when viewing the page.

I hope all your readers have updated virus protection that stopped it.

Bad Ace. Bad. If you're linking, you ought to have Norton Antivirus with the settings configured to warn you of these things.

Bad Ace. Bad.

Posted by: Sean on June 9, 2005 11:27 PM

Correction: Trojan (not a condom) rather than a virus.
FWIW

Posted by: Mike on June 9, 2005 11:34 PM

I'm not sure that's how a Trojan works. Doesn't it mean the Trojan was already on your PC & the Skaf site tried to activate it?

Posted by: beautifulatrocities on June 10, 2005 12:37 AM

The idea that someone has a 70-foot yacht named the Che Guevara is one of the funniest things I've heard in a long time.

Posted by: Gib on June 10, 2005 09:12 AM

His brother, Saadi, has a 130 ft yacht which he crashed into a wharf in Porto Cervo

Posted by: beautifulatrocities on June 10, 2005 09:35 AM

Yeah, this guy makes Russell Crowe look tame. Man what a spoiled bag of shit this guy is!

Posted by: CM on June 10, 2005 09:36 AM

What stupid mutha would name their son Hannibal? Carthidge lost the war and was razed to the ground. Is this the best that Ghadifi could come up with? Why not Mouissilini? I guess with a name like "Moammer" he thought this an improvement.

Posted by: 72 Card Monte on June 10, 2005 12:05 PM