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April 24, 2005

Chris Matthews, Fair and Balanced

Riehl World has what is either a transcript of the Matthews show during the election of the new Pope, or a vicious parody of it.

HOST: Good evening. Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger has been elected the new pope, taking the name Pope Benedict XVI. MSNBC‘s David Shuster is standing by above St. Peter‘s Square in the Vatican—David.

SHUSTER: Regardless of what people say they may think about Joseph Ratzinger, now Pope Benedict XVI, just about everybody we talk with here tonight, Chris, said that this is an evening for hope and possibility—Chris.

MATTHEWS: David, is that hope over experience, because we know that he's a former nazi, ergo Jew-hater extraoridnaire who hopes to see third world women die in the back alley's of non-state sanctioned abortionists.

SHUSTER: No, he's just a short-term bone thrown to the fascist right to help fill the collection plate. This loser will be gone in a few years.

MATTHEWS: OK, great report, David Shuster. George Weigel is a NBC analyst. George, what can we expect from the new pope, Benedict XVI?

GEORGE WEIGEL, NBC NEWS ANALYST: Chris, Joseph Ratzinger had a long devotion to St. Benedict, one of the saviors of western civilization at the beginning of what we conventionally call the dark ages. So I think the program is the revitalization of a goose-stepping Christian culture throughout the world, most especially in Europe leaving the third world to die on the vine, as always.

As usual, it's hard to say for sure whether it's real or a parody. I suspect it's a parody, because Matthews only mentions having worked for Tip O'Neill about eight or nine times, and anyone who's watched Hardball knows damn well the number ought to be twenty to twenty-five mentions.


posted by Ace at 11:06 AM
Comments



I was watching the Chris Matthews show this morning and Andrew Sullivan was on (pissing and moaning about the new Pope). Is he British or is he one of those people who has adopted a faux british accent in a quest to sound intelligent?

Posted by: tinkerbelle on April 24, 2005 12:13 PM

He's British Tink. Also, as to the parody-- Spot on except George Weigel is a social conservative and a big defender of traditional Catholicism. He writes for NR all the time. So that part of the parody doesn't work.

Posted by: Bob on April 24, 2005 12:19 PM

Thanks Bob. I never really paid much attention to Sullivan, but Ace has been a little, eh- how shall we say...preoccupied with him of late.

It almost rises to the level of obession. But please don't tell Ace I said that.

Posted by: tinkerbelle on April 24, 2005 12:42 PM

Ace just goes where the material is. He's not obsessed with HWINTBN, he's just a web whore.
Excuse me. An excellent web whore.

Posted by: Iblis on April 24, 2005 02:33 PM

What does HWINTBN stand for? I keep seeing it but I didn't see the original reference.

Posted by: ace on April 24, 2005 02:35 PM

Oh, okay. He Who Is Not To Be Named.

I thought people were spoofing me, like with "He Who Is Frequently To Be Named" or something.

Posted by: ace on April 24, 2005 02:35 PM

"He who is not to be named"

Posted by: Iblis on April 24, 2005 02:53 PM

Bob: "Spot on except George Weigel is a social conservative and a big defender of traditional Catholicism."

Quite right. I wasn't really trying to parody the guests, as I even changed the msgrs. name. Probably should have done the same in the case above. It was more about the kind of guest Matthews would like to have. : )

Posted by: Dan on April 24, 2005 04:44 PM

Wait a minute, didn't Bill from INDC swear that Dan was not funny? This was funny.

Bill has let me down again. Hopefully he will magically show up to flame me for speaking his name in vain, and restore my confidence in his brittle fucktardiness.

Posted by: Sortelli on April 24, 2005 10:08 PM

hahaha

Posted by: johnny on April 25, 2005 09:47 AM
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