Does this mean I can flirt with you Ace? I'm always paying attention to you!

Dear C-Ford,

I think you're dreamy. You have pretty hair. Do you like me?

Check one.

Yes [ ]

No [ ]

Hey big boy, how about we go have a few Gay Fuels (http://www.gayfuel.com/main.html) and vodka, pop a benzo or two, and give each other foot rubs by the fire.
*wink*
You know I'm interested, I even listened to the live streaming train wreck last week. Hah.

No C-Ford,

Pick me, we have more in common.

Do you like me?

Check one:

Yes [ ]

No [ ]

The zionist cabal pulling the strings of our puppet government ruins any possibility of love in the Jew.S.A. [ ]

Eagerly awaiting,

I wanna see some man-tits. Who's sportin'?

I got man-tits, you monkey. Come and get 'em.

Hey, Dusty's here in the HaloScan pop-up! Back in a jif...

Every time I hear the name Pat O'Brien I just want to say.... HELLO, is it me your looking for?

All of you get me so fucking hot.

Confidential to Betsy:

I'm so fuckin' into you! Let's get some hookers and some blow and just go crazy. Go into the bathroom and leave me a voicemail. Say yes.

p.s.: I don't do this for a living.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
If you were a gushing monthly
I'd be a tampon stuck in you

that ace of spades t-shirt you're wearing is lookin pretty good baby
it'd look even better on the floor next to my bed

Sir,

A post on "flirtation"? Have you no shame, young heretic?Really, this does not even dignify a response. Therefore, I shall let eloquent words of the venerable theologian Homer Simpson, a man who in episode 83 asked to be saved by "Jeebus", speak for me:

'Homer: Sorry, Mr. Burns. I don't go in for these backdoor shenanigans. Sure I'm flattered, maybe even a little curious. But the answer is no!"

Be warned heathen, do not allow yourself to be seduced by the pleasures of the flesh, a slave to it's wanton desire. For this is the way of dissolution, corruption...liberalism. For Pete's sake, look what happenend to Andrew Sullivan, what with his "salty chocolate balls", his simian and hirsute spooning. Madness... madness.

There is still time. Down on your knees sinner, pray with me, me and Clark Griswold:

"O God, ease our suffering in this, our moment of great dispair. Yea, admit this kind and decent woman into thy arms of thine heavenly area, up there. And Moab, he lay us upon the band of the Canaanites, and yea, though the Hindus speak of karma, I implore you: give her a break."

Courage.

rcl

E is for the evil dictator that is you
V is for the victory dances that you do
A is the awesome Axis that you head

B is for our bouncing love bed

Can you guess who is sending this little flirtatious note to you, mein single-barrel fuehrer?

Check one:

Yes [ ]

No [ ]

P.S. I would have dotted all my i's with little hearts, but I don't know how to do it on this computer thingy.

I lead a busy life. No time to waste on "flirting". Let's get right to business.

Who wants some?

Oooh me so velly velly hohhrny, me suckie suckie, me fuckie fuckie. Me luv you long time!

BDC: You know how to arouse a girl's interest.

I'm ready for business with the right man--one who can untie the little bow on my bikini bottom without using his hands.

And I figure that's you. (Seeing as how you don't have any hands and all.)

Cool site!!

Hey!! The con is on...your daughter!! Fathers!! Is Daddy's little girl growing up too fast? Does she talk to strangers? Does she flirt with guys who look ethnic? On the internets?

She needs the firm hand of a man who knows his way around a shower-room gangbang!! You scratch our back, we'll train your dirty girl to do it all!!

She will not chew through the ball gag!!

Fathers!! Be good to your daughters!!

You have to pay attention to Betsy, I told her you were into her.

So. Fuckin'. HOT!!!

Couldn't be more right Dusty.

Bob Dole's Cock can't be slowed down by idle chit-chat or bikini bottoms. Bob Dole's Cock suggests you either come naked or prepared to have your pretty dainties shredded.

I can make time for you at 4:30, right after my raquetball tournament. 4:20 if you just want to meet Bob Dole's Cock in the showers.

Does this mean I can flirt with you Ace?

Sorry, can't. This thread is for the readers.

Besides, Betsy told me she wasn't into it.

Any underage Injun chicks want to teach me to paint with all the colors of the wind--right fore I poke yer anus?

Who are we suppose to flirt with?

Well, each other, you sick monkeys.

Y'all have been doing it everywhere else; why not here?

Silly.

It's Spring of course, and a time when young men's thoughts turn to romance.

I harken back to my youth and a Summer well spent on my grandparent's in the countryside. The sweet young love of two locked in pasionate embrace, the panting and the fire... leaves a longing for a return to this wonderfull time.

Alas, I am now locked into city life with all of it's advantages and limitations.

I was wondering, would anyone be willing to bleat softly while wearing a gray wool blanket?

Great blog. Agree with you totally!

Dear Online Slot Machines, I hesitate to write this because of our past turf friction, but I've sensed a little something more between us. I hope I haven't misunderstood some of your signals, but maybe we can be more than just competitors? If you know what I mean.

Keep up the good work!

Really cool blog. What you say makes total sense! !

Oh my god! You sensed it too? I thought I was crazy to dream there could ever be anything between us, coming from such different worlds and all! You've made me the happiest bot on the server. I'm walking on air!

Play slots in the comfort of your own home! Keep up the good work!

How could you both do this to me?

Great blog. Agree with you totally!

Psych, bitch! Me? Love you? Please How could I fall for Slot Machine Bot? I'm Casinos! The whole damn gambling org! A lowlife slot machine? That is too laugh. Har de har har. We're greasers and socs, sucker. And we know which one is which. Ain't never going to happen.

Keep up the good work!

Really cool blog. What you say makes total sense!

That is the cruelest... my sobs echo across the net. This is what it sounds like when doves cry.

Keep up the good work!

Each other??? You guys are too sleazy for me..Sorry.

;-)

I changed my mind. I'm so into it. I just want to go crazy! Let's do it. Let's have some fun.

Whoever is doing the spambot thing just stop! It's annoying now.

This is the BEST WEBSITE EVER!
Look at all the Hot Sexy Babes on this website!
You want to slam 'em like a jack-hammer on Giambi Juice right?
You want to make sure your "Broom" is ready for stuffing squeakholes right?
You don't want to be singing Ace's themesong do you?
I didn't think so.
So load up with Pure Discount Enzyte. Make Bob Dole's Cock proud!

Than again, you could just ignore me.

Betsy, you have been here alot longer than me, so....who's worthy or not worthy of being flirted with?

Sean M, Sean M, cum to your little SpewFan!

I made the mistake of tangling with Bob Doles Cock after it had a dose of pure undiluted Viagra - never again!

Come on in Sean M....my restroom door is open....my purty lips await....

I'm flattered, BrewFan, but I'm just so fuckin' into Betsy!

Besides, it sounds like your run-in with Bob Dole's Cock has left you with some...baggage.

Confidential to Sean M.

I got some blow, went into the bathroom, and left a message on your voicemail. Pick it up, let me know. Let's do it. Let's have some fun.

For the record, the above is an imposter. The use of the term SpewFan should be a tip off as to who might be responsible. This, my little nazi friend, means war. bwahahahaha! bwahahaha!

Betsy,
I'll bring the hookers!

BrewFan,
I shoulda noticed that. The diabolical Nazi strikes again! Or maybe, just maybe, it was a cry for help.

Sondra?.....Megan?

Who's worth of being flrited with here?
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
(raises hand like Arnold Horshak from 'Welcome Back Kotter')
OOO! OOOH! ME!

Now if I could just get my wife to surf this place, I could get flirted with...

Perchance are any of you that comely 19 year old KMart register wench I gave the sharp end of my tongue to the other day? I was the rather portly gentleman in Hagar slacks who wished to buy 3 packs of AA batteries at the sale price (although you had the temerity to suggest they were limited to two per customer).

Now that my volcanic temper has been rechained, I must say I like a dish with salsa. Tis a pity but I failed to procure your number during our torrid interlocution. Please forward post haste and I shall treat* you to an all you can eat at Willy's Jumbo Greasin' Skillet (my favorite dining experience).

*A la mode du Dutch.