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« Assad Blinks? | Main | Ted Rall, Too, Compares Hitler Favorably To Bush »
March 05, 2005

Michelle Malkin Does a Top Ten

The top ten egregious journalistic violations Dan Rather committed that David Letterman ought to have asked about, but did not.

Via Joust the Facts, who has excerpts of the softball interview that actually occurred, and links to the full transcript if you can bear it.

Joust the Facts is a little annoyed that the main topics of discussion were the "independent" panel's "findings" that there was no evidence of political bias at CBS, and that no one can "prove" the documents are fake (except, of course, for the forensic expert cited in Appendix 4 of the panel's own report).

A "push," Letterman called it.

Riiiight.

Can't wait for his next interview with Hillary Clinton. I'm hoping he'll ask her some really tough, probing questions, like "How do you manage, with your busy schedule as a Senator, advocate, and devoted wife, to insure that the sun rises every day and the stars remain e'er fixed in the firmament?"

More Bashing of Letterman... Beyond the jump, with a good (but reposted) Top Ten.



Letterman was once a hero to me, a curmudgeon with a style of hip-but-dorky irony that influenced my own sense of humor more than just about anyone else in the world.

But I've pretty much had it with him. It seems to be overreacting to write someone off simply on the basis of their politics; but in fact there's more to it than that. Letterman just hasn't been very funny since, oh, I'd say the last year of his stint at NBC.

I hate to say it, but I now think Jay Leno actually does a better show. Or at least the comedy bits of his show are better. Leno still can't manage a decent interview, possibly because he's a little weird as regards social interaction and processing information, and possibly because he can't even fake interest in what his celebrity guest morons have to say.

Which, I gotta say, I can't blame him for.

I swore off reposting old material after my Blogoversary, but I just can't help myself. Letterman sucks, and here's why.

Top Ten Signs That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore

10. Recent Stupid Pet Tricks include "Sit," "Shake hands," and "Hump the Leg"

9. Has become so jaded he demands that at least one guest per show get up on his desk and perform a striptease; last week's show with Nathan Lane was particularly uncomfortable

8. Old Letterman comedy staple: puckish irony;
New Letterman comedy staple: nonstop racial slurs

7. To amuse himself during interviews, has begun playing drinking games; drinks when someone calls a director "generous," chugs when someone says "This script really spoke to me"

6. Wardrobe for show has degenerated into nothing but baggy sweatpants and "Who Farted?" T-shirts

5. Features a new twenty-minute segment in middle of every show called "Dave's Quiet Time," in which audience members are asked to "pursue independent reading" or "engage in quiet group-study"

4. Questions to celebrity guests sound suspiciously similar to clues to the day's New York Times crossword puzzle

3. Last Thursday's "show" was nothing but a taped teleconference with his tax lawyers, interspersed with "wacky" sound effects and still photos of Larry "Bud" Melman

2. Standard end-of-show sign-off, "You've been great! Drive safely!" replaced with ominous-sounding "Another hour nearer the sweet embrace of blissful death"

... and the Number One Sign That David Letterman Just Doesn't Care Anymore...

1. He's "really looking forward to" his next-scheduled bout of pink-eye

posted by Ace at 08:13 AM
Comments



You have got to check out the story Charles Johnson has about Clinton and Iran. It is fucking unbelievable.

As a matter of fact im not sure i do believe it. Do you think Clinton would say something this stupid?

Posted by: little green amish on March 5, 2005 08:34 AM

Remember, twenty years ago, when everyone used to call that tool Letterman "edgy"?

Posted by: DaveG on March 5, 2005 08:47 AM

I don't watch Letterman any more, either.

Based on excerpts, I'd guess the Rather interview was never intended to be serious. He owed Rather a slot, dutifully massaged him with nerfballs, then kissed his ass goodbye. No point in damaging the CBS brand name any further.

Remember the old days when Letterman used to make fun of dissembling, ass-covering bureaucrats, before he became one?

Posted by: lyle on March 5, 2005 09:05 AM

Hey..Letterman better be careful if he asks Hillary! those questions.

Everyone knows that Gannon is responsible for the sun and the stars. And that the first rule of Gannon is that "There shall be no Gannon but Gannon".

Dave may find a lighning bolt in his near future if he doesnt remeber that. Or at least a really unfunny guest appearance by Margaret Cho in which she explains how she beat Ted Rall tothe whole "Bush isn't Hitler because he failes to apply himself" meme.

Posted by: Jack M. on March 5, 2005 09:11 AM

Malkin changed her pic at her site. I like the new one much better.

Posted by: Golden Boy on March 5, 2005 10:14 AM

Ah, Letterman. Where did 12:30 Dave go? I sometimes wonder if his blandification isn't just the normal 'man getting old' thing, or if he could still do his semi-angry, blindside you, coming out of left field absurd humor show. My guess is he thinks that won't work with the 11:30 crowd. Sad. Conan does a lot of funny stuff in that time slot, but wants to be liked so bad (Andy come back!) it's sometimes frustrating to watch. Used to find myself switching over to Kilborn cause of it, even though I KNEW his stuff wasn't nearly as funny. Wonder if Conan'll bland it up too when he takes over Leno's 11:30?

Saw Malkin's new pic too. New one's nice, more relaxed. Lost its 'catwalk' edge. Sort of strange for a political columnist, but the old one had a fashion shoot look, ala the chick is looking at the floor, hair about her face, then suddenly snaps her head back for the quick shot. Sort of a wind-machine, blow-outty thing. [I heard she modeled in on an unreleased George Will headshot] Shame that anything ever changes.

Posted by: Ray Midge on March 5, 2005 11:56 AM

Letterman wears the corporate "brown lipstick" when it come to C&BS news.

Posted by: leno won on March 7, 2005 01:24 AM

Yes, Letterman does indeed suck now, and I too used to love his show, back in the old days on NBC.

I had a moment like Ace describes, back in July, when he was interviewing dipstick Joe Wilson, and I was so pissed off after watching it that I went straight to the computer and wrote this rant. It was cathartic.

Ever since, I can hardly stand to watch the clown, and consider him nothing more than a lightweight lefty dipstick. It isn't good business to be such a partisan asswipe. What would the sponsors say? I wonder if his ratings are down at all?

Posted by: Jeff Brokaw on March 8, 2005 05:31 PM
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