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« Footage Of Ace On TV Talking About His Movie? [Dave at Garfield Ridge] | Main | How and Where the Democrats Went Wrong »
January 26, 2005

Excuse Me, Who's Picking On My Boss?

Oh, fine, sure-- everybody go ahead and laugh at the name of the Acting Secretary of the Air Force.

If *I* can restrain myself from giggling at the name of my boss, you can too.

Trust me, his name isn't the half of it. You know who Mr Teets' deputy was?

Robert Dickman.

I am not making this up.

Believe it or not, it used to be even worse a few years ago. The last Secretary of the Air Force under the Clinton Administration was named. . . F. Whitten Peters.

And, back when Loral did some sneaky-sneaky in transferring rocket technology to China, you know who led the special congressional committee that grilled Secretary Peters for information?

Congressman Christopher Cox and Norm Dicks.

Again, I am not making this up.

Anyways, all giggling aside: Mr Teets is a good guy, a firm hand after all the controversy surrounding the previous Air Force Secretary, James Roche.

Too bad it sounds like Teets is only a temporary choice. Big Blue sure could use the stability right about now. Hopefully, the White House sends some nominees over to the Senate right quick.

So all you wacky kids out there-- get your minds outta the gutter already, there's a war on.

-- Dave at Garfield Ridge


posted by Ace at 01:52 PM
Comments



This reminds me of a meeting of alumni from my high school. The head of the school introduced them in order, from left to right: Paul Hurd, Bob Felt, Brad Upp.

And that was their real names.

Posted by: Dave on January 26, 2005 02:19 PM

Dave,
How did a guy with "a raging black tar heroin habit" get hired and work in the Pentagon for the Air Force? Specifically, how'd you fiddle the pee test? Mine keeps coming back positive.

Posted by: APPLIED AT PENTAGON on January 26, 2005 02:27 PM

Heck, Secretary Teets and Deputy Dickman should feel right at home when visiting Seymour Johnson AFB.

Posted by: SparcVark on January 26, 2005 02:30 PM

In the catagory of worst penis related name ever I nominate Richard Dicker of Human Rights Watch.

Posted by: vonKreedon on January 26, 2005 03:11 PM

C'mon, we all know the worst penis-related name ever was New Hampshire Representative Dick Swett.

SparcVark-- I'm actually ashamed that I never thought of the Seymour Johnson joke before.

APPLIED AT THE PENTAGON (yeah, right)--
Cranberry juice. Lots of cranberry juice.

Cheers,
Dave at Garfield Ridge

Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge on January 26, 2005 03:19 PM

Ok, yeah, Dick Swett wins the category. Sheees, you'd think parents would be more careful.

Posted by: vonKreedon on January 26, 2005 03:31 PM

Sounds like something from a Bond movie:

Peter Teets ... meet Pussy Galore.

Posted by: 72VIRGINS on January 26, 2005 05:31 PM

So, when Secretary Teets is in trouble his "teets" are in a ringer?

Or how 'bout,"Mr. Teets goes to Washington". Let's hope he doesn't "milk" this job.

Posted by: Ron on January 26, 2005 07:44 PM

Dick Swett is pretty good, but come on. Does the name "Dick Trickle" ring a bell?

Posted by: CraigC on January 26, 2005 07:59 PM

A similar observation came up at Oxblog some time ago. Scroll down and look for General Richard Head -- "please, call me Dick."

Posted by: Chris H on January 26, 2005 08:08 PM

The Dean of my law school was named....(I kid you, not) Isaac Hunt. That he maintained a slight ebonic twist to his speaking style added miles to the pronunciation.

Posted by: Kat on January 26, 2005 09:30 PM

There was a gynecologist who lived in suburban Maryland for years whose name was Dr. Harry Beavers. I used to win bets on this all the time. He was in the phone book. Anyone who lived in Md. in the seventies that can back me up?

Posted by: CraigC on January 26, 2005 09:41 PM
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Funniest thing I've read about the Virginia mess. Back when they were hustling the referendum through the assembly both Senators, Warner and Kaine, advised them to go slow and play by the rules. Louise Lucas said she respected them but didn't need advice from the "cuck chair" in the corner. The gerrymandering was overturned and Louise is heading for the big house. Edward G. Robinson voice "where's your cuck now?"
Posted by: Smell the Glove

I posted his post on twitter and it's gotten 25K views so far. Thanks, Smell the Glove
Chris
@chriswithans

aaahahaa.jpg


"Ahhhhh ahh I put my career on the line for Louise Lucas and Jay Jones thinking they'd vault me into presidential contention and we ended up costing Democrats 20 House seats and unleashing a Reverse Dobbs ahhhhh ahhh"
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click That Sums Up the Democrat Communist Party Today
Something is wrong as I hold you near
Somebody else holds your heart, yeah
You turn to me with your icy tears
And then it's raining, feels like it's raining
"It's f**king f**ked."
-- reportedly a genuine comment offered by a "senior Labour source"
Correction: I wrote that Labour is losing 88% (now 87%) of the seats it is "defending." I think that's wrong. The right way to say it is the seats they are contesting -- that is, they don't necessarily already hold these seats, but they have put up a candidate to run for the seat. It's still very bad but not as bad as losing 87% of the seats they already held.
Basil the Great
@BasilTheGreat

🚨ED MILIBAND [a Minister in Starmer's government] SAYS KEIR STARMER WILL RESIGN AS PRIME MINISTER

He has reportedly reassured Labour MP's that Starmer will be resigning following the disastrous results tonight

It's over
"The end of the two party system in the UK" as first the Fake Conservatives and now Labour chooses political suicide rather than simply STOPPING THE INVASION
Incidentally, the only reason this didn't already happen in the US is because of the Very Bad Orange Man (who is right on 85% of all policy calls and extremely, existentially right on 15% of them)
No political party that is NOT also a doomsday religious cult would EVER choose a cataclysmic loss -- and possible extinction as a party -- to support a toxically unpopular favoritism of NON-CITIZEN ILLEGAL MIGRANTS over actual citizen voters.

Only a cult does this.
Now they've lost 84%.
Annunziata Rees-Mogg
@zatzi
If this continues Labour loses 2,148 seats tonight.

That is much worse than the worst case predictions I’ve seen.

Cataclysmic

Update: They've now lost 88% of the seats they're defending. As I mentioned earlier, I think I heard that London will not bail them out, as many of those Labour seats will probably flip to "Muslim Independent" or Green. Detroit's 5am vote will not save them.
Yup, Labour is losing 80% of its seats...
The British Patriot
@TheBritLad

🚨 BREAKING: Labour have lost 80% of all seats contested as of 2:25 AM.<
br> If this continues, Keir Starmer will be out of office next week.

Reform has surged and projected to pick up between 1700-2100 seats.


Wow, up to 1700-2100 seats. It's not incredible that this is happening. It's incredible that the Davos crowd is so absolutely determined to privilege Muslim "migrants" over the actual native population who elects them, no matter how loudly the natives scream that they want to be prioritized, that they will gladly self-extinguish as a party rather than simply representing the interests of their own voters. Astonishing.
Remember, when they call other people "cultists" -- they are the ones so imprisoned in their social reinforcement and discipline bubbles that they will choose political death rather than dare upset the Karen Enforcement Officers of their cult.
Update: Now they've lost 83% of the seats they were defending.
(((Dan Hodges)))
@DPJHodges

Reform are basically wiping Labour out in the North. It's not a defeat. It's not even a rout. Labour are simply ceasing to exist.


Nick Lowles
@lowles_nick

Tonight’s results are calamitous for Labour. Not just for Keir Starmer's leadership, but for the very future of the party
STARMERGEDDON: In early returns, Reform gains 135 seats, Labour loses 90, the Fake Conservatives lose 36 (and I didn't even know they could fall any further), the Lib Dems lose 4, and the Greens gain 6. Note that the only other party gaining seats is the Greens and they're only gaining a handful of seats.
Update: Reform now up 145, Labour down 98.
Labour projected to lose Wales -- where they've ruled for 27 years.
Fulton County Georgia just discovered 400 boxes of ballots for Labour
Update: REF +156, LAB -107, CON -45
Brutal: In four out of five council seats where Labour is defending, they've lost. 80%.
I'm sure it's not this simple, but Reform is straight taking Labour's and the "Conservatives'" seats. They've lost almost exactly what Reform gained. If understand this right (and warning, I probably don't), all of London's council seats are up for election, and Labour might lose hugely there, as their old voters abandon them for Reform, Muslim Indenpendents, and the Greens.
REF +190, LAB -134, CON -56.
Updates on the Labour collapse in council elections -- which wags are calling #Starmergeddon -- from Beege Welborne. There are about 5000 seats up for grabs, Labour is expected to lose 1,800, Reform will probably gain 1,580, up from... zero. So this would be more than that.
People claim that while Labour has adopted the Sharia Agenda to appeal to the million Muslims it allowed to migrate to the country, those voters are ditching Labour to vote for the Muslim Independent Party or the Greens. Delicious. This shadenfreude is going straight to my thighs.
Oh, and if Starmer loses about as badly as expected, Labour will toss him out of a window Braveheart style and replace him. He will announce he is resigning to spend more time with his Gay Ukrainian Male Prostitutes.
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I always thought the gag was original to the comic book, but in fact the "Threat or Menace" headline was a satirical joke about media bias and sensationalism for a long while. The Harvard Lampoon used it in a parody of Life magazine: "Flying Saucers: Threat or Menace?"
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