Intermarkets' Privacy Policy
Support


Donate to Ace of Spades HQ!


Contact
Ace:
aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com
Buck:
buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com
CBD:
cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com
joe mannix:
mannix2024 at proton.me
MisHum:
petmorons at gee mail.com
J.J. Sefton:
sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com


Recent Entries
Absent Friends
Jay Guevara 2025
Jim Sunk New Dawn 2025
Jewells45 2025
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024
Captain Hate 2023
moon_over_vermont 2023
westminsterdogshow 2023
Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022
Dave In Texas 2022
Jesse in D.C. 2022
OregonMuse 2022
redc1c4 2021
Tami 2021

Chavez the Hugo 2020
Ibguy 2020
Rickl 2019
Joffen 2014
AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me
Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups

TBD





















« Must-Read: How They Stole Wisconsin | Main | CPAC Credentials; Radio Appearance Tonight »
January 18, 2005

Mr. Paul Anka: Still Kickin' It With Integrity

Well, I had feared that Mr. Paul Anka's guest appearance on Las Vegas would be an embarassing cameo that sullied his reputation for substance on conscious. I'm happy to say I couldn't have been more wrong.

Mr. Paul Anka played, fittingly enough, Mr. Paul Anka, The Only Important Character on That Show. He showed his acting chops as he helped promote a new burger being offered by the casino -- a sign read "Mystique Reinvents the Burger," which sounds like wonderful news to me. A bandleader called Gunther, who I must assume is a highly fictionalized version of Vinny Falcone, provided some delightful comic relief.

Mr. Paul Anka sang a witty and wry re-working of She's Havin' My Baby:

Havin' my burger
What a lovely way of dressin' up a ground-beef pat-ty
Havin' my burger
One bite one taste and I'm certainly feelin' so hap-py

They didn't fry it
Or make it slo-o-o-ow
They grilled up that meat
with goodness sweet
And cooked it just so

Havin' my burger...
What a lovely way to dress up a ground-beef patty...

Spellbinding.

I am pleased to report that Gunther showed no loose shit with the cut-offs, as the song ended impeccably. I assume he was watching Mr. Paul Anka, Mr. Paul Anka's arms, the instruments and the landing strip, all simultaneously, and with character and heart besides.

For any who saw it, can there be any doubt that Mr. Paul Anka is back?

I think not.


posted by Ace at 03:00 PM
Comments



Did someone TiVo that show? If so, they should throw it up as a bit-torrent, I'd love to watch that.

Posted by: fat kid on January 18, 2005 03:03 PM

Ace,

As a non-TV owner/watcher, this may be one of those rare times when I kinda-sorta would watch.

The whole Paul Anka thing continues to grow, without too much irony, I might add.

Hey, I have an idea.

Maybe, Dan Rather could change his sign-off tag line from "Courage" to...

Wait for it...

"Integrity."

No loose shit there, Dan.

Posted by: MeTooThen on January 18, 2005 03:17 PM

"Hey, I have an idea.

Maybe, Dan Rather could change his sign-off tag line from "Courage" to...

Wait for it...

'Integrity.' "

I think that much irony would cause the CBS studios to implode into a black hole that would devour our world in an instant.

Posted by: Brian B on January 18, 2005 05:03 PM

Brian B.

LOL!

Posted by: MeTooThen on January 18, 2005 06:15 PM
Post a comment
Name:


Email Address:


URL:


Comments:


Remember info?








Now Available!
The Deplorable Gourmet
A Horde-sourced Cookbook
[All profits go to charity]
Top Headlines
Brown killer takes the coward's way out. Naturally.
Still not identified, for some reason.
Per Fox 25 Boston, the killer was a non-citizen permanent legal resident
It continues to be strange that the police are so protective of his identity.
CJN podcast 1400 copy.jpg
Podcast: Will Ukraine be a flashpoint for a Korean conflict, Trump's intemperate Reiner comments, it's the economy stupid! the Monroe/Trump Doctrine, Bondi, Brown, MIT, and more!
Fearful French cancel NYE concert on Champs-Élysées as migrant violence grows
The time is now! France must fight for its culture! [CBD]
Megyn Kelly finally calls out Candace Owens
Whoops, I meant she bravely attacks Sydney Sweeney for "bending the knee." (Sweeney put out a very empty PR statement saying "I'm against hate." Whoop-de-doo.)
Megyn Kelly claims she doesn't want to call people out on the right when asked about Candace Owens but then has no compunctions at all about calling people out on the right.
As long as they're not Candace Owens. Strangely, she seems blind and deaf to anything Candace Owens says. That's why this woman calls her "Megyn Keller."
She's now asking her pay-pigs in Pakistan how they think she should address the Candace Owens situation, and if they think this is really all about Israel and the Jews.
CJN podcast 1400 copy.jpg
Podcast: Pete Hegseth is everything the left hates...and we love! Illinois is the next flashpoint for federal supremacy with regard to our borders, Trump's communication leaves something to be desired, and more!
I have happily forgotten what Milo Yiannopoulos sounds like, but I still enjoyed this impression from from Ami Kozak.
More revelations about the least-sexy broken relationship in media history
I'd wanted to review Parts 2, 3, and 4 of Ryan Lizza's revenge posts about Olivia Nuzzi, but they're all paywalled. I thought about briefly subscribing to get at them, but then I read this in Part 2:
Remember the bamboo from Part 1?

Do I ever! It's all I remember!
Well, bamboo is actually a type of grass, and underground, it's all connected in a sprawling network, just like the parts of this story I never wanted to tell. I wish I hadn't been put in this position, that I didn't have to write about any of this, that I didn't have to subject myself or my loved ones to embarrassment and further loss of privacy.

We're back to the fucking bamboo. Guys, I don't think I can pay for bamboo ruminations.
I think he added that because he was embarrassed about all the bamboo imagery from Part 1. He's justifying his twin obsessions: His ex, and bamboo. Which is not a tree but a kind of grass, he'll have you know.
Olivia Nuzzi's crappy Sex and the City fanfic book isn't selling, says CNN (and CNN seems pretty pleased about that)
On Tuesday, the book arrived in stores. At lunchtime, in the Midtown Manhattan nexus of media and publishing, interest in Nuzzi's story seemed more muted. The Barnes and Noble on Fifth Avenue had seven copies tucked into a "New & Notable" rack next to the escalator, below Malala Yousafzai's "Finding My Way." Not many had sold so far, a store employee said.

A few blocks uptown, at a branch of the local independent chain McNally Jackson Books, a few volumes lay on a table of new and noteworthy nonfiction near the front of the store. No one was lining up to get them, or even browsing. Bookseller Alex Howe told CNN around 3 p.m. that though the store had procured "several dozen" copies, not a single one had yet sold -- a figure he said was surprising, considering how many people in media and publishing work in the area.

"We ordered a lot and so far, people have not been beating down the door," Howe said. "I'm not sure where we're gonna put them because right now, supply is outpacing demand." (A manager at McNally Jackson noted that Howe was speaking only in a personal capacity, not as a representative of the store.)

She trashes Ryan Lizza for his "Revenge Porn" here. Emily Jashinsky says that when the Bulwark's gay grifter Tim Miller asked why she didn't report on the (alleged) use of ketamine by RFKJr., she broke down in tears and asked to end the interview.
Canada Euthanized a Record 16.4K People Last Year
Aktion T4, now with Poutine! [CBD]
CJN podcast 1400 copy.jpg
Podcast: Sefton is back with CBD to discuss killing narco-terrorists (we are both for it!), the TN special election, Trump's communication skills, and more!
Minneapolis mayor Jacob Frey vows to Somali criminals that he will not cooperate with ICE, then begins speaking in Somali
Gee I wonder why Walz allowed Somali pirates to steal 1 billion in American dollars... could it possibly be that criminal illegal aliens are voting in elections and the Democrats know it and play to that illegal constituency?
Incumbent Senator John Cornyn (RINO - TX) betrayed his party and his country by voting in favor Biden's Afghan resettlement bill in 2021. Cornyn voted to bring in the Afghan who shot two National Guard soldiers on US soil. A vote for Cornyn is an endorsement of importing unvetted, radicalized murderers. [Buck]
Escaped "SlenderMan Stabber" picked up with her "transgender" friend
We're increasingly loose with the word "transgender" aren't we?
Recent Comments
Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ : "Mine is too small to cut a 2x4 on a 45. They di ..."

Fluffy Nuggets, Jr.: "Good morning. Is it secret? Is it safe? ..."

JQ: "Pixy time already?! Uh-oh... Good night, Horde! ..."

m: "Hi, Pixy. ..."

Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ : "Ha, you said tile. - Hammer, with a hammer, got ri ..."

Pixy Misa: "Morning all! ..."

Pixy Misa: "Poke. ..."

Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ : ">>>I let it do the work and it never bound up. I h ..."

JQ: ">I would like a good battery circular saw. The ryo ..."

Skip : "G'Day ..."

m: "w00t ..."

m: "Pixy's up! ..."

Bloggers in Arms
Some Humorous Asides
Archives