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A Horde-sourced Cookbook
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Top Headlines

Dude trolls a city council meeting about permitting yet another mosque by promising the mosque will destroy America
"All women who are overweight or obese will have to wear burka. 10,000 steps per day, low carb."

Podcast: Will Cuba fall without a fight? More Iran confusion, gun rights for felons isn't a crazy idea, wetbacks are voting! And are data centers of the devil? Nope!

Google finally gets one right

Months ago, I reported that the final Zodiac cypher had been cracked and the name of the killer revealed. And the name of the killer turned out to be someone suspected in the unsolved Black Dahlia murder. The general tone of my mention of this was "serious you guys, this is real."
Well, it's not real. It's total bullshit.
Sorry about that. I did two things: 1, I bought into something, a conspiracy theory really, because it was new and exciting. And 2, I allowed a self-declared "expert" to snow me over with his "expert" claims about solving ciphers, an alleged expertise I could not challenge because I know practically nothing about codebreaking. I remember being similarly swindled by self-declared "experts" babbling about "chromatic aberrations." (Although I didn't really buy into that, but I found it "interesting" and I wasn't strongly skeptical about it. Hey they said they're "experts," they must know that they're talking about, right?)
I screwed up. It won't be the last time, I'm sure.

TJM definitively ranks the films of Andrei Tarkovsky and explains the joys of discovering older movies over anticipating new ones.

Podcast: In Wisconsin, the Dems steal an election from themselves, abortion is cheered in Massachusetts, Spain gets what it voted for, the economy is humming, and more!

Subway rider belts out Nessun Dorma (which you may recognize from Trump's rallies and from my favorite Mission Impossible movie, Rogue Nation)

Via Archimedes:

Selections from H.P. Lovecraft's Brief Tenure as a Whitman's Sampler Copywriter

Chocolate Cherry Cordial
You must not think me mad when I tell you what I found below the thin shell of chocolate used to disguise this bonbon's true face. Yes! Hidden beneath its rich exterior is a hideously moist cherry cordial! What deranged architect could have engineered this non-Euclidean aberration? I dare not speculate.

Caramel Chew
There is a dimension ruled by a blind caramel God-King who sits on a vast, cyclopean milk-chocolate throne while his mindless, gooey followers dance to the piping of crazed flutes. It is said that there are gateways in our world that lead to this caramel hell-planet. The delectable Caramel Chew may be one such portal.

More at this ineffable link

Forgotten 80s Mystery Click
I haven't forgotten this one. I play it a couple of times a month. But I bet a lot of you forgot it:
Athletic (boogie down)
Hustle (turn back)
Feel pathetic (sugar town)
No muscle (soul hack)
I'm jumping (you move)
No dancer (beside me)
I'm thumping (you prove)
Don't get no answer

TJM dives into the thrill a minute cinema of Andrei Tarkovsky

Building collapses during 7.4 magnitude earthquake in Colombia

On "Professor" Arday:

He was their living lawn jockey, period. They won't say that 'cause they're sensitive and down with his struggle and all. He was there to appease and flatter their sense of being uplifters of the oppressed. In truth, he served as their living lawn jockey -- no more, no less, and unworthy of even a second thought on their part. Tokenism, pure and simple.

-- Krebs v Carnot

TJM definitively ranks the films of Sergio Leone. You won't believe #6. Real hot take there.

Bro spent four years/4000 hours painting an eleven-foot long cutaway-view layout of the USS Enterprise

Ireland's 'Air Force One' lacks a key safety system for fog -- thanks to country's ban on Israeli products
Ireland's best emigrated 150 years ago. The current Ireland is a sad joke. [CBD]

Podcast: More Iran bluster from Trump? Enough! Deportations hit a record, and that is a good thing for all, Todd Blanche's nomination is out of committee, the DSA is on the march, and more!

TJM struggles with Sergio Leone's legacy

The Short Unhappy Life of a Russian Soldier: Why recruits die in 20-30 minutes
Interesting video. Some key parts: drones were responsible for 70-80% of all battlefield deaths in mid-2025, and I bet it's higher now. The Russian army is incredibly corrupt. Men get assigned to the most dangerous frontline units, the "Storm" units, unless they pay a superior $2,000 to be assigned to a different unit. Furthermore, there is often no real training for recruits -- commanders pocket the money that would have gone towards fuel and ammo costs incurred during training. Much "training" consists just of taking a single picture of soldiers doing something soldier-y, like fording a river, and publishing that as proof that the training was done. Even when it is done, training is only two weeks long.

TJM wonders what the most Scorsese movie that Scorsese ever Scorsesed was

TJM definitively ranks the films of Fritz Lang

Recent Comments

fd: "If it means she won't reproduce, I'm all for it. ..."

Dark Lixtiquatal: "It’s like that douchenozzle that exhibited a ..."

Nazdar: "And several commenters have said it better. Horde ..."

[/b][/i][/u][/s]I used to have a different nic: "[i]I am aware, but that's not what is going on wit ..."

tcn in AK: "155 Ozempic chic has replaced heroin chic. Posted ..."

San Franpsycho: "Served 31 years in prison, so SF has a theory that ..."

tcn in AK: "147 AOC has posted Part 2 of her egg-freezing pro ..."

FenelonSpoke : "Posted by: Bulg at August 21, 2026 07:04 PM (77rzZ ..."

[/b][/i][/u][/s]I used to have a different nic: "[i]Ozempic chic has replaced heroin chic. Posted ..."

toby928(c) : "I don't think Trump will make it through his term ..."

Bulg: "RIP Karen Carpenter. What a gorgeous voice. ..."

Nazdar: ">>Ariana Grande is probably going to pass like Kar ..."

Bloggers in Arms

Some Humorous Asides

Kaboom!

Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You

You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss
Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president.

A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta

Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me

Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn
Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty.

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon

A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates

Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree

Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility

The Dowd-O-Matic!

The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)


Advertise Here! Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Contact Ace: aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com Buck: buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com CBD: cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com joe mannix: mannix2024 at proton.me MisHum: petmorons at gee mail.com J.J. Sefton: sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com Recent Entries Touchy Cats Cafe The Week In Woke Hollywood: Shit or Garbage? Malignant Narcissist Meghan Markle and Her Poisonous Cuck Husband Schemed to Have Political Power in America Poor Innocent Baby-Lamb Karmelo Anthonhy: "When I Stab Someone I'm Going to Lick the Blood Off the Blade" Paul Sperry: Federal Prosecutors Reveal Evidence That James Comey Knew Full Well That "86" Was Code for "Murder," and Actually Wrote a Whole "Novel" Whose Plot Revolved Around Stirring Up Public Passions to Get Someone to Assassinate a Politician Leftwing Podcaster Suggests That Joe Biden Had Been Rufied for the Presidential Debate; Jill Biden Agrees It's Possible, Saying "Who Knows?" THE MORNING RANT: Governor Abbott vs Texas State University: The Taxpayer-Funded School Is Determined to Staff a University P.R. Position with a Foreign H-1B Mid-Morning Art Thread The Morning Report — 8/ 21 /26 Absent Friends Captain Whitebread 2026 Jon Ekdahl 2026 Jay Guevara 2025 Jim Sunk New Dawn 2025 Jewells45 2025 Bandersnatch 2024 GnuBreed 2024 Captain Hate 2023 moon_over_vermont 2023 westminsterdogshow 2023 Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022 Dave In Texas 2022 Jesse in D.C. 2022 OregonMuse 2022 redc1c4 2021 Tami 2021 Chavez the Hugo 2020 Ibguy 2020 Rickl 2019 Joffen 2014 AoSHQ Writers Group A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info: maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security Cutting The Cord [Joe Mannix (not a cop)] Cutting The Cord: It's Easier Than You Think [Blaster] Private Email and Secure Signatures [Hogmartin] Moron Meet-Ups Texas MoMe 2026: 10/16/2026-10/17/2026 Corsicana,TX Contact Ben Had for info	« Outstanding History of, and Defense of, Bush "Torture" Policy \| Main \| The Media: Aiding and Abetting the Enemy? » January 14, 2005 The Orphans of the Tsunami Generation: Screwed Again Incite has a great piece on the great number of orphans created by the tsunami, and the resistance of the "culture cult" to letting these poor kids be adopted by would-be parents from other countries. Apparently it's preferable to be a ward of of a somewhat-impoverished and dysfunctional state -- or recruited as a child-soldier into a paramilitary -- than to be raised by citizens of the Great Satan. posted by Ace at 02:57 PM Comments Ace, you obviously don't understand the requirements of the global economy. If those orphans stay in Asia, they can use their small hands to stitch running shoes in exchange for a bamboo mat and a tiger cage. If those orphans come to America, we'll have to buy them running shoes. And no tiger cages. In fact, methinks the coming Asian child slavery boom is going to be very good for the Western economy. Who are we to stand in the way of progress? Cheers, Dave at Garfield Ridge Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge on January 14, 2005 03:08 PM The sad truth is that, with attitudes like those on display by the UN, more of these kids will end up in Thai whorehouses than in American or Australian homes. Posted by: David on January 14, 2005 03:23 PM That's because like O'Chub, the UN views all those kids as LBFMs. And who is the UN to deprive them of their livelyhood? Posted by: Iblis on January 14, 2005 04:21 PM Let them eat cake! Posted by: fat kid on January 14, 2005 04:57 PM Ace, Way OT. Willis thinks he has a scoop of the year. Get this. Ron Paige and Armstrong Williams were frat boys together! Isn't that just great investigative reporting or what? Please Ace- hammer this hack! I am astonded at the publicity this 3rd rate knucklehead gets Thanks Posted by: jy on January 14, 2005 06:17 PM Thanks for the link Ace! I've decided lately to dedicate myself to abusing the UN. Needed something to focus on what with the elction being over and everything. It's like shooting fish in a barrel. The roundup. Posted by: Beck on January 15, 2005 09:04 AM Well after all, what is a good home- safety, food, and loving parents- without 'cultural identity?' Better that they starve as authentic South Asians, right? This is the same bullshit that is keeping needy kids out of the homes of people who desperately want to take care of them, right here in the US. Posted by: lauraw on January 15, 2005 09:37 AM Post a comment Name: Email Address: URL: Comments: Remember info?	Now Available! The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines Dude trolls a city council meeting about permitting yet another mosque by promising the mosque will destroy America "All women who are overweight or obese will have to wear burka. 10,000 steps per day, low carb." Podcast: Will Cuba fall without a fight? More Iran confusion, gun rights for felons isn't a crazy idea, wetbacks are voting! And are data centers of the devil? Nope! Google finally gets one right Months ago, I reported that the final Zodiac cypher had been cracked and the name of the killer revealed. And the name of the killer turned out to be someone suspected in the unsolved Black Dahlia murder. The general tone of my mention of this was "serious you guys, this is real." Well, it's not real. It's total bullshit. Sorry about that. I did two things: 1, I bought into something, a conspiracy theory really, because it was new and exciting. And 2, I allowed a self-declared "expert" to snow me over with his "expert" claims about solving ciphers, an alleged expertise I could not challenge because I know practically nothing about codebreaking. I remember being similarly swindled by self-declared "experts" babbling about "chromatic aberrations." (Although I didn't really buy into that, but I found it "interesting" and I wasn't strongly skeptical about it. Hey they said they're "experts," they must know that they're talking about, right?) I screwed up. It won't be the last time, I'm sure. TJM definitively ranks the films of Andrei Tarkovsky and explains the joys of discovering older movies over anticipating new ones. Podcast: In Wisconsin, the Dems steal an election from themselves, abortion is cheered in Massachusetts, Spain gets what it voted for, the economy is humming, and more! Subway rider belts out Nessun Dorma (which you may recognize from Trump's rallies and from my favorite Mission Impossible movie, Rogue Nation) Via Archimedes: *Selections from H.P. Lovecraft's Brief Tenure as a Whitman's Sampler Copywriter* Chocolate Cherry Cordial You must not think me mad when I tell you what I found below the thin shell of chocolate used to disguise this bonbon's true face. Yes! Hidden beneath its rich exterior is a hideously moist cherry cordial! What deranged architect could have engineered this non-Euclidean aberration? I dare not speculate. Caramel Chew There is a dimension ruled by a blind caramel God-King who sits on a vast, cyclopean milk-chocolate throne while his mindless, gooey followers dance to the piping of crazed flutes. It is said that there are gateways in our world that lead to this caramel hell-planet. The delectable Caramel Chew may be one such portal. More at this ineffable link Forgotten 80s Mystery Click I haven't forgotten this one. I play it a couple of times a month. But I bet a lot of you forgot it: Athletic (boogie down) Hustle (turn back) Feel pathetic (sugar town) No muscle (soul hack) I'm jumping (you move) No dancer (beside me) I'm thumping (you prove) Don't get no answer TJM dives into the thrill a minute cinema of Andrei Tarkovsky Building collapses during 7.4 magnitude earthquake in Colombia On "Professor" Arday: He was their living lawn jockey, period. They won't say that 'cause they're sensitive and down with his struggle and all. He was there to appease and flatter their sense of being uplifters of the oppressed. In truth, he served as their living lawn jockey -- no more, no less, and unworthy of even a second thought on their part. Tokenism, pure and simple. -- Krebs v Carnot TJM definitively ranks the films of Sergio Leone. You won't believe #6. Real hot take there. Bro spent four years/4000 hours painting an eleven-foot long cutaway-view layout of the USS Enterprise Ireland's 'Air Force One' lacks a key safety system for fog -- thanks to country's ban on Israeli products Ireland's best emigrated 150 years ago. The current Ireland is a sad joke. [CBD] Podcast: More Iran bluster from Trump? Enough! Deportations hit a record, and that is a good thing for all, Todd Blanche's nomination is out of committee, the DSA is on the march, and more! TJM struggles with Sergio Leone's legacy The Short Unhappy Life of a Russian Soldier: Why recruits die in 20-30 minutes Interesting video. Some key parts: drones were responsible for 70-80% of all battlefield deaths in mid-2025, and I bet it's higher now. The Russian army is incredibly corrupt. Men get assigned to the most dangerous frontline units, the "Storm" units, unless they pay a superior $2,000 to be assigned to a different unit. Furthermore, there is often no real training for recruits -- commanders pocket the money that would have gone towards fuel and ammo costs incurred during training. Much "training" consists just of taking a single picture of soldiers doing something soldier-y, like fording a river, and publishing that as proof that the training was done. Even when it is done, training is only two weeks long. TJM wonders what the most Scorsese movie that Scorsese ever Scorsesed was TJM definitively ranks the films of Fritz Lang Recent Comments fd: "If it means she won't reproduce, I'm all for it. ..." Dark Lixtiquatal: "It’s like that douchenozzle that exhibited a ..." Nazdar: "And several commenters have said it better. Horde ..." [/b][/i][/u][/s]I used to have a different nic: "[i]I am aware, but that's not what is going on wit ..." tcn in AK: "155 Ozempic chic has replaced heroin chic. Posted ..." San Franpsycho: "Served 31 years in prison, so SF has a theory that ..." tcn in AK: "147 AOC has posted Part 2 of her egg-freezing pro ..." FenelonSpoke : "Posted by: Bulg at August 21, 2026 07:04 PM (77rzZ ..." [/b][/i][/u][/s]I used to have a different nic: "[i]Ozempic chic has replaced heroin chic. Posted ..." toby928(c) : "I don't think Trump will make it through his term ..." Bulg: "RIP Karen Carpenter. What a gorgeous voice. ..." Nazdar: ">>Ariana Grande is probably going to pass like Kar ..." Bloggers in Arms RI Red's Blog! Behind The Black CutJibNewsletter The Pipeline Second City Cop Talk Of The Town with Steve Noxon Belmont Club Chicago Boyz Cold Fury Da Goddess Daily Pundit Dawn Eden Day by Day (Cartoon) EduWonk Enter Stage Right The Epoch Times Grim's Hall Victor Davis Hanson Hugh Hewitt IMAO Instapundit JihadWatch Kausfiles Lileks/The Bleat Memeorandum (Metablog) Outside the Beltway Patterico's Pontifications The People's Cube Powerline RedState Reliapundit Viking Pundit WizBang Some Humorous Asides Kaboom! Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! 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The Orphans of the Tsunami Generation: Screwed Again