Intermarkets' Privacy Policy
Support


Donate to Ace of Spades HQ!


Contact
Ace:
aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com
Buck:
buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com
CBD:
cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com
Doof:
doof2112 at proton.me
joe mannix:
mannix2024 at proton.me
MisHum:
petmorons at gee mail.com
J.J. Sefton:
sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com


Recent Entries
Absent Friends
Captain Whitebread 2026
Jon Ekdahl 2026
Jay Guevara 2025
Jim Sunk New Dawn 2025
Jewells45 2025
Bandersnatch 2024
GnuBreed 2024
Captain Hate 2023
moon_over_vermont 2023
westminsterdogshow 2023
Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022
Dave In Texas 2022
Jesse in D.C. 2022
OregonMuse 2022
redc1c4 2021
Tami 2021
Chavez the Hugo 2020
Ibguy 2020
Rickl 2019
Joffen 2014
AoSHQ Writers Group
A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info:
maildrop62 at proton dot me
Cutting The Cord And Email Security
Moron Meet-Ups





















« Voter Guide-- Addendum | Main | I Voted! »
November 02, 2004

I Don't Like Sex & Candy

Hmmm... using candy to lure children into graphic discussions of sex? Why didn't I think of that?

Oh yeah-- because the last time I tried they locked me up on trumped-up morals charge.

Dawn Eden, Petite Powerhouse, finds Planned Parenthood putting their filthy chocolate in the pliant peanut butter of innocent young minds, by using M&M's as an excuse for dirty-talk with children:

Code:

* Plain Brown = Health (either treatment or abstinence)
* Plain Blue = Condoms or Dental Dams
* Plain Green = Trichomoniasis
* Plain Yellow = Gonorrhea
* Plain Red = Chlamydia
* Plain Orange = Syphilis
* Peanut Green = HIV
* Peanut Red = Hepatitis B
* Peanut Orange = Herpes
* Peanut Yellow = HPV

Oy gevalt. I don't know if I'm bothered more by the sexualization of children or by the fact that apparently there are diagnosable retards able to get paying jobs in writing whereas I'm still working the counter at Kinko's.

I especially liked this bit of cleverness:

(Note that bacterial infections are represented by plain M&Ms and viral infections are represented by peanut M&Ms.)

Very witty. And note that hydroencephalitis is represented by Smarties, and malignant goiters by Zero bars.


posted by Ace at 03:56 AM
Comments



*Plain Pink = Gay Aids

Posted by: Ron on November 2, 2004 07:56 AM

Great. Now I'll never be able to eat another Zero bar.

Posted by: Kerry on November 2, 2004 07:58 AM

Here's an idea ... if kids aren't grown-up enough to know and use the ACTUAL names of the sexually transmitted diseases ... MAYBE THEY SHOULDN'T BE HAVING SEX. I mean, what's next? A dancing Elmo that introduces this crap? I hate the Planned parenthood crowd -they don't want to teach kids that a baby's heart starts beating at 6 weeks -- because that goes against their "abortion for everyone" agenda.

Posted by: Carin on November 2, 2004 08:32 AM

In your free time, check some information dedicated to...

Posted by: on February 13, 2005 12:28 PM
Post a comment
Name:


Email Address:


URL:


Comments:


Remember info?








Now Available!
The Deplorable Gourmet
A Horde-sourced Cookbook
[All profits go to charity]
Top Headlines
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: Garrett's Sus iPod Edition
Everybody wants you
Everybody wants your love
I'd just like to make you mine, all mine

Just imagine he's singing that to a dude.
BTW I thought this was a completely different band from Garrett's Sus iPod, the Bay City Rollers.
CJN podcast 1400 copy.jpg
Podcast: The Nobel Peace Prize farce, Ilhan Omar in hot water, Talarico's disappearance, Guilfoyle is a crook, Should Nidal's execution be streamed, Bugs Bunny, and more!
Shane Gillis tells a mildly amusing joke; the feminazis and their gay best friends freak out! [CBD]
Our very own "Weasel" has won the Nobel Prize For Physics:
A Rigorous Investigation into the Quasi-Static Equilibration of Shoulder-Fired Ballistic Platforms: Rear-Bag-Mediated Suppression of Angular Perturbations and Its Implications for Sub-MOA Precision.
[CBD]
CJN podcast 1400 copy.jpg
Podcast: A sea change in Israel? France might fall before the UK! Trump's Iran rhetoric is manipulated by the commie media (film at 11!), Brazil looks good, and Rubio looks even better (maybe)!
CAIR Wrote It. San Diego Passed It, 8 to 0 .
"City records show CAIR drafted the definition of "Islamophobia" that San Diego adopted" [CBD]
Christian Toto Roasts Digger: "We have an A-list star (Tom Cruise) stretching his talents in ways we haven't seen in some time. The story has something to say about the world (Climate Change) and human nature in all its complexities." Sounds...boring! [CBD]
Nearly one thousand Roman silver denari found in woods near Cologne, Germany, probably deliberately buried in 125 AD
It's about seven pounds of ancient silver. Alas, it's not an artifact of the massacre of the XIXth Legion at Teutonburg Forest, which is about a hundred and fifthy miles away.
CJN podcast 1400 copy.jpg
Podcast: Vote Early...Vote Often! Oil exports are returning to normal, Trump relaxes CAFE standards, ChiComs fund AI backlash, the descendants of our business titans are anti-American, Boston is nuts, and more!
Trump 'Surprised' UK Freed Airbase Plot Suspects
Why? They are honored guests of the UK? [CBD]
CJN podcast 1400 copy.jpg
Podcast: CBD is solo and just checking in! Trump's UN speech is a success, the Last Ditch Bar in Western MA keeps their lunacy in the spotlight, and the White House plays hardball with the media and the judiciary...as it should!
If you care, the new end credit scenes added to the Avengers: Endgame re-release have leaked. Watch 'em fast before they're deleted.
This post has a written summary of the scenes.
LOL:
Somebody should write a book about the greatest drinking stories of O'Toole, Burton, Harris, and Caine. One of my faves was Richard Harris went on a six week bender in the South of France without telling wifey. Upon return, she's screaming, and he simply replied "why didn't you pay the ransom"?

Posted by: bill in arkansas
Recent Comments
Don Black: "yes- it is a 'scold' of Karens this has been pr ..."

TheJamesMadison, precisely framed and deadpan with Wes Anderson: "322 If she self-deported to Somalia and we don't l ..."

Aetius451AD: "307 It amuses me that people are getting worked up ..."

IRS: " i was up all night doing my taxes and i'm wiped. ..."

Yudhishthira's Dice: "I bet it was more annoying for the neighbors when ..."

Mike Hammer, born and bred Tar Heel: " >>Tens of millions of dollars have been sent to S ..."

Kindltot: "[i]If she self-deported to Somalia and we don't le ..."

Somalian sommelier: "She put the money somewhere.... I wonder if Bessen ..."

[/s][/s][/i][/i][/u][/u]Christopher R Taylor[/u][/u][/i][/i][/s][/s]: "[i]Typical. Another vile dem politician who couldn ..."

Ian S.: "[I]Guitar pedal manufacturer discovers the brave n ..."

JackStraw: ">>The winery sounds like a good way to hide graft ..."

The Dog: "[i]"You're annoying the hell out of all the neighb ..."

Bloggers in Arms
Some Humorous Asides
Archives