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« Ex-JAG Officer: Kerry Dishonorably Discharged | 
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| Movement Towards Kerry: Terrible Harbinger or Weekend Polling? »
 November 01, 2004 Ace of Spades HQ Voter Issue GuideFANTASY FILMS BUSH:  The Lord of the Rings, especially The Two Towers; Excalibur 
 BUSH:  blue-collar workers; the American Heartland  
 BUSH:  Destroyer, aka "Paranoia," by The Kinks 
 BUSH:  George Thoroughgood and at least two (2) of the Delaware Destroyers 
 BUSH:  My baby fits me like a flesh tuxedo/I wanna sink her with my pink torpedo 
 BUSH:  Dennis Miller, Larry Miller, Drew Carey, Colin Quinn 
 BUSH: (from Mickey Spillaine's I, the Jury) LOVE INTEREST, AFTER HAVING BEEN SHOT AND MORTALLY WOUNDED BY MIKE HAMMER: How... c-c-could you? KERRY: (from The Big Chill) GLENN CLOSE: I really want you to bang my kinda-ugly best friend and knock her up. Because, you know, we all love each other so darn much!' ARCHAIC MILDLY-BLASPHEMOUS MIDDLE-AGES OATH BUSH:  Zounds!  (derived from "God's Wounds") (Look, I'm sorry about that one, for any who might be offended. But really, that's how they used to curse. Take it from someone who played D&D in middle school.) 
 BUSH:  Luke and/or Boba Fett 
 BUSH:  Somebody, Bryan Adams; or I Know What Boys Want, the Waitresses 
 BUSH:  "I say we nuke them from orbit" 
 BUSH:  "Mad" Max Rocatansky ("Two men enter, one man leaves") 
 
 BUSH:  Ferris Buehler; Andrew McCarthy from St. Elmo's Fire 
 BUSH:  Ricki Tikki Tavi; A Charlie Brown Christmas 
 BUSH:  Steve Guttenberg from Police Academy (you just know Bush is a fan) I Just Know There's More to This Premise Update!  But I'm dry.  If you've got a good one, drop it in the comments, and I'll compile the best of reader-submitted comparisons later tonight. posted by Ace at 12:58 PMComments I have a Kerry Song Suggestion: Anthem or whatnot Guyana Punch by the Judys For John Edwards a bit of Josey Cotton: Johnny are you Queer? being an 80s guru you should know these song, no? 
 Posted by: Jennifer on November  1, 2004 01:15 PM Judy's Guyana Punch you can hear it there if you don't recall it :) Posted by: Jennifer on November  1, 2004 01:21 PM I've heard of Johnny Are You Queer, but I don't know it. It think it was in Valley Girl. I never heard of the other one, or that band. Posted by: ace on November  1, 2004 01:21 PM yeah they used alot of josey cotton stuff in Valley girl. 3 or so songs. Great soundtrack on that flick. Plimsoles and Modern English. Josey predates the movie a bit though. The Judys were/are a punk band from Texas but were very successful in that whole genre of music. Milk is another of their big songs. Posted by: Jennifer on November  1, 2004 01:27 PM I didn't think the Judy's made it out of Texas much. Posted by: David [.net] on November  1, 2004 01:35 PM Thanks for the laugh. "Never Ending Story." Heh. Posted by: Scout on November  1, 2004 02:11 PM Personally, never saw it. Saw the commercials, though, and thought: "Wow. There is a movie that I am not going to see, EVER, even on basic cable." Posted by: ace on November  1, 2004 02:19 PM ***KERRY: Dr. Smith from Lost in Space ("Dear boy! Oh, stop your cantankerous clanking, you moronic mechanical monstrosity!")*** Nah. Ol' Zachary was too dead-on butch for Kerry. Gave the li'l trooper a real... "funny feeling" downstairs, like, whenever he'd sit there on the living room carpet in his footie 'jamas, scarfing up a big ol' double bowl of Cocoa Krispies and goggling at LOST IN SPACE re-runs on Saturday mornings. Posted by: Kent on November  1, 2004 02:20 PM KERRY: "Let's study them! Who among us can say that these vicious man-eating creatures aren't worthy of our respect, friendship, and -- dare I say -- even... love?" Come on, that couldn't be from a real movie...could it? Posted by: Alex on November  1, 2004 02:21 PM Admit it Ace. You still play Dungeons and Dragons. Posted by: Matt on November  1, 2004 02:31 PM Matt, Never. Posted by: ace on November  1, 2004 02:32 PM ***Never*** Then how come your left eye does that weird, uncontrollable... *twitchy*-type thing, every time someone says "Hot Elven Chainmail Chicks In Bondage"...? :) Posted by: Kent on November  1, 2004 02:35 PM Elton John song Late night TV sci-fi classic Posted by: Gordon on November  1, 2004 02:48 PM Favorite Arnold Schwarzenegger movie-- Bush: Raw Deal Kerry: Junior Dungeons and Dragons character-- Bush: 20th level paladin Kerry: 3rd level druid/7th level illusionist half elf/half human/half sprite Favorite board games-- Bush: Risk, Monopoly Kerry: Chutes and Ladders, Candyland Favorite action figure-- Bush: GI Joe with groin-kick foot action Kerry: Ken, sports fashion accessories edition Posted by: Nicholas Kronos on November  1, 2004 03:00 PM A better Bush "Spinal Tap" lyric: "You're too young, and I'm too well hung." Category: Vehicle or sexual activity Posted by: Joe R. the Unabrewer on November  1, 2004 03:03 PM If each were a car: Bush:  '77 primer-gray Silverado Dooley, naked-lady mud flaps Posted by: See-Dubya on November  1, 2004 03:05 PM Ace, It pains me that you know the characters of Cats (or if you don't I can't tell). Posted by: hobgoblin on November  1, 2004 03:22 PM Favorite military man Bush: George Patton Kerry: "Hawkeye" Pearce Favorite card game Bush: Five-card draw Kerry: (Rich) Old Maid Favorite father's day gift Bush: New chainsaw Kerry: Something soft and silky, imported, yet somehow masculine Favorite Star Trek character Bush: Captain Kirk Kerry: Either Jean Luc or Number One, he can't make up his mind. Wait--maybe Data. And Councilor Troy, but not for those reasons. Posted by: Nicholas Kronos on November  1, 2004 03:26 PM Carbonated Beverages: Wine: Illegal Drugs: Homestar Runner Character: Posted by: See-Dubya on November  1, 2004 03:32 PM Warner Bros. character Bush:  Yosemite Sam Posted by: see-Dubya on November  1, 2004 03:56 PM Favorite Comic Book... Bush:  Batman Posted by: RapidTransit on November  1, 2004 04:15 PM Hot 60s TV chick Bush: Jeannie, Catwoman, Ginger Posted by: Nicholas Kronos on November  1, 2004 04:32 PM Godfather character he most identifies with Favorite James Bond villain Underrated American novelist Foreign city he'd consider visiting on a lark Posted by: Nicholas Kronos on November  1, 2004 04:50 PM Favorite Terminator Bush: T-800 Model 101 Posted by: Stumbo on November  1, 2004 05:34 PM Reason to smile when hearing the word "Nantucket" Bush: reminds him of dirty limerick Posted by: Stumbo on November  1, 2004 05:46 PM Favorite baseball play Bush: grand slam Posted by: Stumbo on November  1, 2004 06:12 PM Nicholas, Kerry would be more for Troi's mom. You know, a rich widow. Dale Posted by: Dale on November  1, 2004 07:25 PM KERRY: "Let's study them! Who among us can say that these vicious man-eating creatures aren't worthy of our respect, friendship, and -- dare I say -- even... love?" Come on, that couldn't be from a real movie...could it? Was it Pierce Brosnan in Mars Attacks? Posted by: Lord Floppington on November  1, 2004 07:38 PM Oh yeah. Comic strip character most closely identified with: Kerry: Billy in Family Circus running on of his ridiculously torturous trails to get from point A to a very nearby point B. Bush: Steve Dallas in Bloom County. Posted by: Lord Floppington on November  1, 2004 07:43 PM Nicholas Kronos: LMAO @ Mrs. Howell. Too true! Pizza toppings: Bush: Meat lovers with extra cheese.  Horror movie quote: Footwear: Bush: Cowboy boots. Steel toed. Posted by: krakatoa on November  1, 2004 09:16 PM Patton/Hawkeye is clearly the best entry, so far. Posted by: Stumbo on November  1, 2004 10:05 PM Ace, What the fuck was that?? I mean to say, what the fuckin' fuck WAS THAT!?!? What are you Fucked??? WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT??!!! Posted by: Swiftsure aka Vinny Falcone on November  1, 2004 10:31 PM Quotes from "Mad Max"... Bush:  Step right up, chum, and watch the kid lay down a rubber road right to freedom! Quotes from "The Road Warrior"... Bush: I'm the best chance you've got. And, from Thunderdome: Bush: I'm the guy who carries Mr. Dead in his pocket. Posted by: bbeck on November  1, 2004 10:58 PM **It pains me that you know the characters of Cats (or if you don't I can't tell).** Sadly enough I do know them, and I noticed that Ace was wrong. It's "Rum Tum Tugger" not Tumbler. If it makes you feel better, he seemed to be modled after Billy Idol... Posted by: To Embarassed To Tell on November  1, 2004 11:04 PM Bush's salute to an ally: Down's a shot of 180 proof Polish vodka and sings out: "Long live our brave allies". Kerry's salute to an ally: Down's a shot of watery herbal tea and says: "Down with American imperialism." Posted by: BattleofthePyramids on November  2, 2004 12:22 AM Sadly enough I do know them, and I noticed that Ace was wrong. It's "Rum Tum Tugger" not Tumbler Thanks for the correction. Of course, I deliberately got it wrong, because while I thought a Cats joke was called for, I did not want to make it at the expense of revealing any familiarity whatsoever with this lavish Broadway production. Posted by: ace on November  2, 2004 02:54 AM Post a comment | The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines 
	Interesting football history: How the forward pass was created in response to the nineteen -- 19! -- people killed playing football in 1905 alone The original rules of football did not allow forward passes. The ball was primarily advanced by running, with blockers forming lines with interlocked arms and just smashing into the similarly-interlocked defensive lines. It was basically Greek hoplite spear formations but with a semi-spherical ball. As calls to ban the sport entirely grew, some looked for ways to de-emphasize mass charges as the primary means of advancing the ball, and some specifically championed allowing a passer to throw the ball forward. 
	1977 ABC Afterschool Special: "The Pinballs," starring Kristy McNichol Garrett told me this film changed his life. 
	Sydney Sweeney unleashes the silver orbs Thanks to @PatriarchTree Fallacies do not cease to be fallacies because they become fashions.-- G.K. Chesterton [CBD] 
	Latrine John-Pissoir can't explain her book -- an Inside Look at a Broken White House, but she says she means the Trump White House, which she had no inside look at -- even to friendly leftwing media interviewers Speaking as a black woman and black LGBT woman and black immigrant... Bonus points all day on Tuesday to anyone who begins all of his or her posts with "Speaking as a black LGBT woman..." 
	Atari to release former competitor Intellivision with 45 games for $149 I always thought Intellivision was kinda lame (to the extent a cutting edge videogame box can be lame). Intellivision insists upon itself. Pitfall was a really good game. I don't know if it was available on Intellivision. Update: It was. But I don't know if it's included in the new unit. 
	Terrorist-aligned AP: "Reporter describes shock at witnessing East Wing's demolition" White House press corps: "SO TRUMP CAN DEMOLISH ANYTHING HE WANTS TO?!?!" Yes. Thank you for acknowledging that. 
	From Archimedes: Democrats are really now arguing that it's time to open the Big Tent to Nazis: At Insty:Link to Ed Driscoll's post here Black Conservative Perspective says there's a "Woke Civil War" going on in the left over this Nazi, with Race Marxists -- mostly black -- absolutely determined to cancel him, while the straight-up Communists -- mostly white rich-bitch nepo babies -- are fighting like hell for him. As many have noted: Communists are always willing to make a tactical alliance with Nazis. (And, of course, Communists are just totalitarian socialists with an internationalist foreign policy, while Nazis are totalitarian socialists with a nationalist foreign policy. They're two anti-human peas in a pod.) The white communists are fighting hard for this guy because he is an open, avowed communist, and they think his completely-fake "normal blue-collar guy" persona can be used to do what they cannot do, sell communism to the working class. 
	Lost 70s Mystery Click 'cause it gets me nowhere to tell you no/and it gets me nowhere to make you go  
	Commie Mamdani transforms, Zelig-like, to be whoever he's trying to con at any moment 
 
	Democrat hopeful to replace Susan Collins as Maine Senator -- the man who got a Nazi Totenkopf tattoo because he was "very inebriated" and who is now known as "Maine Kampf" -- also taught gun tactics to... Antifa Antifa can't be Nazis, I mean it's right in their name. (But National Socialists aren't socialists -- the name means nothing!) "Maine Kampf" thanks to Fenelon Spoke, who nabbed it from Daniel Greenfield 
	Lia Thomas Unrepentant over Taking Titles from Women: 'It's Easier to Fight the World Than Fight Yourself' If you suspected that Will Thomas is an asshole...you were correct. [CBD] 
	British travel blogger experiences his first SEC college football game, tailgating, and Southern hospitality. His videos display the true America and not the dystopia shown by Hollywood.  (take notice of how 95% of the people are thin, attractive, fun loving, friendly, and polite.) [dri] 
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