...there are a lot of people who are fucking morons but who are really convinced they're terribly bright and witty.

Like the man in your mirror?

Well, I'm very smart. Just ask my Mom.

But I do know the basic parts of speech pretty well. I especially know nouns, because, you know, even a fucking retard can grasp the function of a noun and identify nouns with 95% accuracy.

But not, apparently, Jon "All This Undeserved Media Attention Has Gone to My Head" Stewart.

An utterly predictable response. Sad.

That wasn't directed at Ace, by the way.

First Post:

Ace, I don't fear you!
You're an idiotic chimp!
by Anonymous

I posted about his bastard cousin Bill Maher earlier today. Like Jon Bill thinks he is a freakin mensa candidate, though he is more like a "one step away from columbine" candidate.

http://www.templeofjennifer.com/blog/index.php?p=568

Want to know the worst part about Jon? He has a child. Some poor innocent baby who will have to grow up with that idiot.

Jon Stewart is a smart-ass that could be hilarious if he chose to poke fun at both sides equally. Instead, he has chosen the path of partisanship which automatically means that half his potential audience will have nothing to do with him.

How smart is that?

Ironically, the "party of the people" is populated by a group that purports to know more than their audience. I suppose that we are just to nod our heads and acknowledge their intellectual superiority. They will tell us how to vote and we should be grateful they do that.

My wife is a teacher and she constantly gets mailings from the state and national teacher's unions. I always say, "At least you now know who you are supposed to vote for." Not surprisingly, one year they endorsed BOTH candidates for governor. They knew the Democrat was going to get hammered in the election, so they had to headge their bet. That was very usefull campaign information.

Schoolhouse rock taught me
But not Jon Fuckin Stewart
Terror is a noun

"Ennui" is a noun too.

Actually I would venture a guess that 90% of Americans believe that nouns are literally "persons, places, or things" and things in the substantive sense. They can be touched, or in the case of war, physically attacked.

Now if you tried to explain that "Terrorizing" is a gerund (a verb acting as noun) - you'd lose them for sure and likely get a can of PBR thrown at your noggin.

But none here need to worry about any of that, because you're at least at the level of "fucking retard". Hey Ace, are you responsible for the bogus 'special olympics' flyers planted at the Fitzhugh HQ? - Very Rovian!

Ace - I think you're a fucking GENIUS!! Keep up the good work. :)

Ace, please don't terror Jon Stewart. He's been terrored enough.

Ace, you've arrived. Apparently, the insufferable Noam Chomsky's now trolling your site under the pseudonym "Batman."

"Trolling." Hmm. Another gerund. Me smart now! I think me drink a PBR to celebratize!

"Trolling." Hmm. Another gerund. Me smart now! I think me drink a PBR to celebratize!

Rocketeer: LOL - was that intentionally done in the voice of Bizarro Superman?

Batman Post (Cliff's Notes):

Made up statistics!
Americans are stupid!
Rove: evil genius!

What did Bill Maher inject into his lips to turn them into elephant ears?

queen of the space unicorns

John Jon Stewart is a potty mouth child. I think he at least has the half hearted integrity to point that out occasionally. Unlike the Barking Moon Bats of the liberal left in this country. He has made a point to say he is on following a show of puppets making crank phone calls. Welcome to the shallow money trench and plastic hallways of the teevee box. Turn it off. TURN IT OFF. Learn to paint. Do anything but make these people relevant by talking about them. If you ignore them they cease to exist, unlike terrorists.

/rant.

There once was wingnut named Johnny,
Who learned to Haiku from his Mommy.
His trick soon grew boring,
But no measure of imploring,
Could keep him from stroking his Salami.

Queen,

In case you hadn't noticed, this blog is HOSTED by a 'potty-mouthed' child. Seriously - go back through the archives and find out for yourself. Most of the people who post here are 'potty-mouthed' children. This is not the place to point out that Jon Stewart is a potty-mouth and have that statement MEAN anything :-)

People that think they know everything really annoy those of us that do.

Batman, were you referring to Johnny Kerry or Johnny Edwards?

Potty mouth.

There once was a fighter of crime
Whose butler had taught him to rhyme
he screwed up the meter
while beating his peter
Pray next time he tries it in mime

***We declared war on terror - it's not even a noun, so, good luck. ***

... and this, mind you, from a partisan shill for the same party metronomically declaring "war against poverty," every four years... :)

there are a lot of people who are fucking morons but who are really convinced they're terribly bright and witty.

Why does every fucking post on this site have to be about Oliver Willis? Huh?

Stewart is just so above all of us. Sadly, he can probably get away with staying stupid shit (oh, sorry, I mean MERD) most of the time, because to be an intellectual among the liberals, you just have to SOUND like one. You don't actually have to know "stuff." Your merd don't actually have to make sense.

And, Queen, if it makes you feel better ... I've NEVER watched his show (just seen clips here and there.) Life is too short.

The Democrat in my household was actually in the same class at William and Mary as Jon Stewart, class of '84.

She remembers the following about Stewart...he a stoner who was always playing frisbee in the sunken garden. A nice guy. Not terribly ambitious, never worked too hard, but a definite stoner. There may even have been a dog, who wore a bandana, involved in those games of frisbeen.

Stewart is the typical political humorist who hides his cranial vacuity behind quick wit and bluster. He's basically a white male Whoopi masquerading as Chevy Chase

That's not fair, Bill. Sometimes Ace focuses on Sullivan.

I wouldn't have it any other way, keeps the rest of us from having to do it :)

Same goes for 80's trivia.

10/19/04

"Stewart is the typical political humorist who hides his cranial vacuity behind quick wit and bluster. He's basically a white male Whoopi masquerading as Chevy Chase."

I did not know Will Rogers, and Will Rogers was never a friend of mine, but Jon Stewart is no Will Rovers. Neither are Whoopi or Chevy. Will Rogers was a REAL political humorist. He wasn't mean, nasty, profane, or undignified, but he was funny, and he was brilliant in his humor.

Lonnie Kendall

-Carin
>Sadly, he can probably get away with staying stupid shit (oh, sorry, I mean MERD)

That's 'merde' Carin.

C'mon, you guys remember "Batman" doncha?

That old ad where the Steve Young-esque quaterback gets clobbered and when asked who he is says "I'm Batman."

Methins our Batman is the victim of a head trauma.

Batman? I think not.
"Johnny" rhymes with "Mommy?" Nope.
Bruce Wayne, he is not.

That's "The Batman" to you, zetetic.

Villians and criminals of your sort are usually quite limited in their understanding of concepts both simple, and complex. They lack the ability to appreciate 'nuance', you might say - and can only understand things in black or white terms.

There are many types of rhyme. Assonant, consonant, weak, rich, scarce, etc...

Perhaps once I return you to Arkham, you will have time to study and become a poet :-)

When I was a kid, I'd spend all my time trying to prove to other kids how much smarter than them I was by telling them all the grown-up words I knew. Meanwhile, I was oblivious to just how obnoxious I was and how hard they were laughing at me behind my back.

Thank God I outgrew that phase. Maybe someday "The Batman" will too.

Ah, yes.... Nuance. I've always had difficulty with that. Keeps me from being a Democrat, I imagine.

This week's Time magazine ran an ad for "The Daily Show" that summs it up perfectly:

1 Anchor
4 Correspondents
Zero Credibility

Do we even need to go beyond that?

Merd, merde, it's all shit to me. There was a reason I got "C"s in French.

"'Ennui' is a noun too."

You RethugliKKKan$ and your dictionaries.

Brian,

Please. - Obnoxiousness, abundant use of profanity, and pedantry are defining characteristics in the posts and many of the comments on this blog.

I'm in Rome, and I'm being a fucking roman, yo.

Defense rests.

I'm not sure what's going on. I thought Batman was a Conservative who used to post here (or over at Allah's). I don't know. At least the limericks are funny. "While beating his peter."