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October 04, 2004
John Kerry, the Rosie Ruiz Candidate?John Kerry has said, repeatedly, that he ran the Boston Marathon. As you no doubt are aware, John Kerry says a lot of things. Football Fans For Truth reports that ESPN has been unable to confirm this feat. John Kerry's campaign claims not to be able to provide details -- what year, etc. -- and no official records of this Mendacious Metrosexual Marathon Man seem to exist. Praytell, was this marathon by any chance the Cambodia Classic? Maybe the Phnom Penh Pro-Am Invitational? The Khmer Rouge Capitalist Dog Run? Hat tip to CalGal at The Perfect World. posted by Ace at 01:37 PM
CommentsGreat! The first serial liar since LBJ now poised within 1-2 vote percentages of being Prez! Posted by: Cedarford on October 4, 2004 01:49 PM
Rats, I forgot one thing. John Kerry released his medical records showing he had bad knees from preppie sports injuries in his youth. He can bike, but making the Boston Marathon invite cut, then running 26.2 miles?? Yeah, I'd like to see the Boston Athletic Club records reviewed. Soon! Apparantly he said it himself so he can't weasel out like he did with the Chinese assault rifle being blamed on a staff flunky filling out a questionnaire improperly. It's trivial, but with 3-5% of the women's vote swinging to Kerry because they dislike Bush because he can't control his smirking and face fidgiting - it amounts to another strike against Kerry's credibility on more important things like Vietnam medals, foreign affairs, and his domestic pledges. If true. And men vote as irrationally as some women. A man could be unemployed from outsourcing, have a son stuck in the Sunni Triangle in what he thinks was a stupid war to start, have a wife with a disease that could be cured perhaps with stem cell treatments......and still vote for Bush. Simply because the guy can't abide a sports cheater. Posted by: Cedarford on October 4, 2004 02:02 PM
The first serial liar since LBJ? Have we forgotten Clinton already? Posted by: zetetic on October 4, 2004 02:18 PM
I love that Cambodia line. Can't quit laughing long enough to type. Posted by: Roundguy on October 4, 2004 02:21 PM
A caller to the Howie Carr radio show this past Friday stated that he saw Kerry do a 5 mile run in the early nineties. Said caller also stated that Kerry could barely walk over the finish line, at which point someone went into a bathroom, grabbed a roll of toilet paper and unrolled it in front of the finish line so Kerry could cross it like he won the damn thing. Such local stories of Kerry's vanity are many and legion in these parts. Posted by: Roger Bournival on October 4, 2004 02:46 PM
Ok, I'm going to stretch here and offer this little tidbit in his defense... he could have raced without registering and finished without being counted in the official results. Then again, Boston is hard as hell. It's probably not likely. He probably made it as far as Wellesley, hopped on Commuter Rail to South Station, and then hid behind the bushes and jumped into the finishing pack. More likely, he was probably talking about his house at Marathon, you know, in the Florida Keys. Posted by: Charles on October 4, 2004 02:58 PM
Ace, if you want to keep up the comedy aspect of AoSHQ, we're going to have to do something about Cedarford. Depression coming from the comic is fine - coming from a heckler is... well, just depressing. Posted by: The Black Republican on October 4, 2004 03:07 PM
Now now, black republican.....surely you can see the humor in a ardent male democrat and ardent sports fan deciding Kerry lost his vote - only because he said "Lambert Field" or ran a phantom Marathon? It's as funny as a women voting for Kerry because he has "nicer hair" than Dubya, or voting for Bush because she admires Laura Bush because Laura provided her own cookie recipe. And while you laugh, remember that some people actually vote that way. Posted by: Cedarford on October 4, 2004 05:46 PM
So, what? "I decided to register for the marathon before deciding against it." If Kerry cannot honestly say what, if anything, he actually did in relation to the Boston Marathon after boasting of his participation, it surely offends me who couldn't give a rat's ass about sports. Back when he was some semblence of a stand-up comic Bill Maher did a gag saying Clinton being a liar wasn't a handicap because he was the BEST liar and voters chose him for the entertainment value in an era when they didn't think there was any serious work to trouble the President. If Kerry is going to try to be a Clintonesque liar he really needs to work on his technique. Posted by: Eric Pobirs on October 4, 2004 06:59 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
Democrat propagandist Anderson Cooper shed any pretense of being a journalist and just attacked Stevens for flip-flopping, as she had earlier (begrudgingly) endorsed Abdulrahman Mohamed El-Sayed. Stevens kept explaining why she had changed her position, but the Objection Journalist Who Supports Women just kept interrupting and talking over her and re-asking the same question-- why did you change your mind -- with a tone that suggested maybe it was just because of her menses.
Some Invisible Man costumes (which I hope aren't just AI):
An invisible man with a missing body (I assume the real person is *behind* the costume; A kid in the same kind of costume, put together by his mom; another invisible man; and another great Invisible Man costume, my favorite.
Email confirmed as once used by the Muskily Heterosexual James Talarico found in leak of emails of Fling.com sex dating site:
An email address that James Talarico's attorneys confirmed belonged to and was at one time used by the Texas Democratic U.S. Senate candidate appears in a database search result associated with the adult dating website Fling.com's 2011 data breach. A Fling.com account was created with Talarico's email address just before Talarico began teaching sixth graders. "Well I can't believe the trans-child-obsessed Confirmed Bachelor James Talarico is into group fetish shit," said noted void phantom Doctor Nullity, The Man Who Never Existed I'm not the guy who noted this, I saw it on X (Razib Khan maybe), but The Bulwark could be "audience capture". It might have started as the Frum / 90s-Kristol / NRO classic Eisenhower Republicanism. But nobody was reading the Bulwark except leftists.
Some researchers think the enigmatic and unreadable cipher of the Voynich Manuscript has resisted decipherment because the pages were bound in the wrong order, and putting them in the right order might allow them to finally break the code
But as of now: No Joy It occurs to me that a key step in breaking the Zodiac 340 cipher was putting the three parts of it in the correct order.
Flashback: "trans man" Lawyer freaks out after a judge denies "his" motion. He's ultimately arrested. "He" makes so much drama he was just recruited to develop a new CW show.
I'm just wondering if this flighty high-calorie pyrsyn is also in the news today for other reasons.... Update: No, it's not. Zee/Zem says they's name is like "Rob Hopkins" or something. Story here, courtesy of The Blade
Buck Throckmorton on The Continuing Crisis (American Spectator) podcast discusses prediction markets.
[CBD]
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click
[Song title]
From Anonosaurus Wrecks:
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John Kass retires
He's great. He'll be missed.
Supreme Court to hear arguments on 160-year-ban on home distilleries
It's about time they took on an important case! [CBD] We call on France to exercise restraint when dispersing the freedom fighters on the streets of Paris. These brave warriors for justice must receive immediate humanitarian aid, and their safety must be guaranteed in accordance with international law. Failure to comply will leave us no choice but to bring a case before the ICJ, in close cooperation with that renowned champion of human rights, Afghanistan.-- Israel War Room [CBD]
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: Garrett's Sus iPod Edition
Everybody wants you Everybody wants your love I'd just like to make you mine, all mine Just imagine he's singing that to a dude. BTW I thought this was a completely different band from Garrett's Sus iPod, the Bay City Rollers. Recent Comments
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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