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Daily Tech News 1 July 2025 Monday Overnight Open Thread - June 30, 2025 [Doof] No Emus Is Good Emus Cafe Quick Hits State Department Revokes Visa for Immigrant British Rapper Who Chanted "Death Death to the IDF" at BBC-Broadcasted Music Festival "Thousands" of Migrant Children Trafficked Into Forced Child Prostitution Under Stutterin' Joe Biden Are Now Being Rescued by ICE Politico: Kamala Harris Is Reaching Out to Democrat Leaders About a Bid for California Governor But "No One Is Incredibly Pumped" #Winning: Inflation Rises More Slowly, Gas Prices Fall, and the Markets Hit All-Time Records A European Economist Admits: "Maybe Trump Has Outsmarted All of Us" Canada Surrenders to Daddy Trump on Tax on Tech Services Absent Friends
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October 04, 2004
Romanian Man Mistakes Penis For "Chicken Neck;" Chops it Off, Feeds it To DogEven Less Hot Than "Kelvin Lynn" Strumming His Doucheboy Folk Guitar While Trying to Pick Up a CISPES-G Chick: Greg sends this story, which I sorta suspect will be one of those stories that gets big play and then gets retracted in 48 hours. Still, when someone sends you a link about a man "mistaking his penis for a chicken neck" and then cutting it off and feeding it to his dog before he realized his "mistake," you link that story. That's my policy: BUCHAREST (Reuters) - A elderly Romanian man mistook his penis for a chicken's neck, cut it off and his dog rushed up and ate it, the state Rompres news agency says. "Out of danger?" That's one way to put it. Now, I never mistook my penis for a chicken neck, but I did once erroneously believe that one of my testicles was a tangerine that would be very tasty blended up into a margarita, so I can sympathize with this guy. Yes, I lost a testicle, but I did invent Mangerine Margarita Mix, and I'm now well on my way to being a multi-millionaire. As my Pappy used to say, no door closes without a window being opened. My time is far too precious to make up jokes about this, but I can make up a few punchlines. Fill in the straight lines as you see fit. Top Ten Punchlines About Man Who Mistook His Penis For A Chicken Neck and Fed It To His Dog 10. "In fairness, you can understand my mistake. It was up every morning at the crack of dawn waking the neighbors. And, also, it had bright red wattles." 9. "Yes, but apart from that, how did the soup turn out?" 8. "Hey, that's not a beak, that's your vas deferens!" 7. "Say what you will, but my dog's coat is shinier and healthier than ever." 6. "And so, having been tricked by a crafty chicken into cutting off his genitals, he swore vengeance upon the entire Chicken-Race. That man's name? Frank Perdue, the Ahab of Poultry." 5. "Snausages!" 4. "I used to think it was cool to drop a tab of acid before taking off my pants and spending the night butchering poultry. Now, I'm not so sure." 3. "Stop him before he goes for the gibblets!" 2. "It's just not a party until someone chops off his weiner and feeds it to a wolfhound." ...and the Number One Punchline About the Man Who Mistook His Penis for a Chicken Neck and Then Fed It To His Dog... 1. "Well, sir, I'm afraid there's nothing we can do about the penis you chopped off after mistaking it for a chicken-neck. We can only apply a salve and attempt to make you comfortable. What kind of salve would you like-- Barbecue, Honey-Mustard, or Mesquite?" posted by Ace at 12:26 PM
CommentsMangerine? OMFG, I don't think I'm gong to recover from that one. I can barely type from the laughing... Posted by: IgwanaRob on October 4, 2004 12:46 PM
SNAUSAGES!!!! I am howling.. Howling! Posted by: Arvin on October 4, 2004 12:59 PM
CNS has a pretty wild Iraqi memo story out... here (by way of Powerline) http://www.cnsnews.com//ViewSpecialReports.asp?Page=\SpecialReports\archive\200410\SPE20041004a.html My thoughts here...http://curbsideprophet7.blogspot.com/ Posted by: James on October 4, 2004 01:14 PM
My thoughts: 1) James - while I applaud your efforts to alert the country to the CNS story, is a chicken neck/penis top ten really the venue? 2) Not being a professional humorist, I can't understand how some sort of "chicken choking" reference couldn't crack the top ten. Posted by: David on October 4, 2004 01:19 PM
Cock-a-doodle-DON'T!!! Posted by: Uncle Jefe on October 4, 2004 01:33 PM
"Kibbles and WHAT?" Make up your own wiener dog joke here. The dog used to just beg at the table. Now it follows him EVERYWHERE. Recurring nightmare: the guy's a chicken and someone's coming to collect the eggs. Posted by: glove on October 4, 2004 02:57 PM
1st:how the fuck do you make that big of a mistake? Posted by: $ N I K I N K $ on October 6, 2004 09:34 AM
Are you certain this event didn't happen in "Butcher-est"? Posted by: Skye on August 16, 2005 07:38 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
Ever Wonder How The Woke Left Can Be So Obviously Hypocritical And Automatically Reject All Opposing Facts? Below are four short 5 minute videos of author Melanie Phillips explaining why.
The Disturbing Logic Of The Left.***
The Psychology Behind Why the WOKE Left Can't Win Arguments.***
The Bizarre Union of Woke and Jihad.***
Truth is a Right Wing Concept. [dri]
Wow, Katie Perry is having a rough couple of years: like her career, her engagement to Orlando Bloom is now over
The Trump Curse strikes again. She went from an apolitical ditz to a Hillary Clinton Crusader in 2016 and her career bottomed out like Hillary Clinton's blood sugar level after a weekend of vodka and self-pity. The Trump Curse even follows you into space, yo. Or at least into the lower upper atmosphere.
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click, I Can't Believe It's Not Night Ranger Edition
If you would just be sensible You'd find me indispensable I pray deep down to destiny That it places you with me Whoa, wanting you here in the sheets Wandering around incomplete Waiting so long I'm pretty sure I've linked this before but it's a banger.
Republican running for Mitch McConnell's seat literally trashes him in new ad
It's the anniversary of the Biden debate debacle.
Biden's senility becomes undeniable. The Democrats pronounced that he had clearly triumphed in the debate. How CNN reported Biden's "intense" debate prep before the debate and then after. Amy Klobuchar predicted victory. The Washington Examiner looks back at the Night of Great Stuttering.
Kari Lake, just when I think you couldn't get any dumber, you pull a stunt like this, and totally redeem yourself!!!
I think the Democrat is arguing that the political appointees should exercise no control over their rabidly communist VOA employees. This is what they're always arguing -- they stock the bureaucracy with literal communists and then claim that the voters should have no control over these unfirable radicals. Lake offers a for-instance that will appeal to this Democrat of allegedly-suspect bedroom guests.
Senator Rounds invites Trump to "an appreciation event like you've never seen" at the Sturgis Bike Rally
Obviously Trump should go. LOS ANGELES (AP) -- Lalo Schifrin, the composer behind the iconic 'Mission: Impossible' theme and many more film and TV scores, dies at 93. This post will self-destruct in five seconds.
Chuck Schumer hospitalized after experiencing "lightheadness" while attempting to diagram a Kamala Harris sentence
Wait, it says he was supposedly working out at the gym. Sure, whatev's. Maybe he had a fight with Harry Reid's exercise bands. ![]()
Smart Military Blog Practical Advice: How to Stop a Dog Attack in 3 Seconds. [dri]
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