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Wednesday Night ONT - September 16, 2026 [TRex]
Elephants and Dog-Moms Cafe "Rogue" Juror Speaks, Plus Fresh-Baked Quick Hits Haitian Illegal Alien Criminal and Gang Member Who Vowed He Would Never Go Back to Haiti Is Forcibly Placed on a Plane and Sent Back to Haiti Hollywood Is Fake and Gay: Wolverine Is Gay, Green Lantern Only Got the Ring Because of White Privilege Report: ActBlue Raised Illegal Foreign Money for Democrats and Then Covered It Up New Zohran Mamdani Top Advisor Literally Wrote the Book on "Gay Communism" Day-Old Quick Hits Fake News "NHL Reporter" Blasts Sydney Sweeney for Using Her Body to Sell Merch... But Of Course Previously Posted a Booby Bikini Photo to Sell "Hot Girls for Hockey" Merch Wednesday Morning Rant Absent Friends
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A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published.
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October 01, 2004
This Weekend: A Very Special Episode of Ace of Spades HQAce of Spades, Teenager in Turmoil, learns his best friend is addicted to speed. He must decide to keep the secret, or tell his friend's parents. Special Guest Appearances by Tony Danza, Meredith Baxter-Birney, and former Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders. My own blogging will be light this weekend -- I have a major pain-in-my-ass commitment, though I'll try to get on the damn hotel computer and do some posting -- but I'm proud to announce the site's first guest host. Is "proud" the right word, really? I don't think so. Overstates it by at least 80%. Let's just say I'm required to announce the site's first guest host. I had actually hoped to get someone you might have sorta-mighta heard of to guest-blog this weekend, but the best I could come up with was Hoke Malokey. Hoke is a smart analyst and damn funny too. He's funny in that dry, erudite witty manner -- you know, pussy-shit. College-boy crap. While I was out there bustin'-ass on a tuna boat in the Berring Straits, Hoke was standing around at a fancy-pants university club in his pansy tweeds and spats making cutting remarks about the pate. But seriously: he's good. He knows politics inside and out; I've learned a lot from him. He's also technically incompetent, so if he does anything stupid, like turn the entire site upside down or set the default font to "Sanskrit Sans Serif," try to alert him to that. Be nice to him, but not too nice to him. I don't want to see anything even close to "You're much better than Ace; why don't you start your own blog?" I'm not going to get on Paula Zahn with that kind of crap being posted on my site. If you need to contact him, either about a tip or about how badly he's screwed up the coding for the site, drop him a line at hokemalokey-AT-yahoo.com (replace the "-AT-" with @). Anyway, assuming Hoke doesn't completely nuke the Munuvia software, I'll see you sporadically over the weekend, and then again Sunday night. Playing the Expectations Game: Incidentally, Hoke Malokey is coming off the bench cold. This is all very last-minute, and he hasn't had time to prepare or anything like that. So, while I imagine he'll have interesting stuff to say, it will be all off-the-cuff and posted on borrowed time. posted by Ace at 05:00 PM
CommentsWow...Hoke Malokey! I've herad great things about him. There should be a noticable improvement in this site in Ace's absence......... Posted by: Senator PhilABuster on October 1, 2004 05:15 PM
Is that Hoke as in "poke" or as in "Hok-EE"? Hok-EE rhymes better. Posted by: George on October 1, 2004 05:16 PM
I believe it's "Hok-EE." Senator, See? There you go. Just as I feared. Posted by: ace on October 1, 2004 05:18 PM
I'm just grumpy 'cause I was hoping that Johnny Coldcuts was gonna take over.... Posted by: Senator PhilABuster on October 1, 2004 05:49 PM
Senator, Alas, I think that Johnny Coldcuts was much like the Chris Elliot character "The Guy Under the Stairs" on the Letterman show. Funny for a while, and then forgotten. Sorry. Posted by: ace on October 1, 2004 05:55 PM
Wow that Hoke Malokey is a much better writer than Ace. He should get his own blog. What that? He hasn't started yet? I stand by my words. Posted by: Brass on October 1, 2004 06:00 PM
I'm still holding out for Rich "Psycho" Giamboni. Posted by: John on October 1, 2004 06:25 PM
So let me get this straight.....you threaten to kill off Johnny Coldcuts in order to solicit pledges/donations to save his life...then you write him off (pun intended) anyway? What next? Are you gonna be selling Bush memos to CBS? Or maybe utilizing some of that expensive Andrew Sullivan bandwidth while blogging from P-town? It's all a fraud! I'm gonna rally the pajamahadeen and unleash the full fury of the blogosphere on you. Or not. I'm hungry, and there's a good ballgame coming on. Maybe later. Posted by: senator philabuster on October 1, 2004 07:34 PM
I have reasons to believe that this post is a forgery. There is no Berring Sea, there is a Bering Sea. However, Tuna are not fished in the Bering Sea. What have you done with Ace?! Posted by: Dave Pasquino on October 2, 2004 08:25 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click, Guitar Hero Edition
Oh here it comes That funny feeling again winding me up inside Every time we touch Hey I don't know Oh, tell me where to begin cause I never ever Felt so much Okay, that was pretty easy. Here's one that's 3% harder. But still easy. Ooh, can you feel the static? So many contacts being made We've got up-front fanatics Tearing down the barricade To reach the stage Can you feel the rage?
Dear RNC; Go f*ck yourselves. I have gotten 56 texts in the last two weeks...all offensive and sneaky and all begging for money. At this point I would rather donate to AOC. [CBD]
BIG NEWS UPDATE NOT FIRED from anon2020 So what, she quit? Megyn Kelly (accursed be her name) used to say all the time that Fox has a top female PR person who is a nasty pitbull and leaks nasty claims about anyone Fox is at war with, including those who have left the network. So I guess maybe she technically resigned? I don't know. NEW: @FoxNews has obtained Lindsay Clancy defense attorney Kevin Reddington's appeal filing to the MA Supreme Court, which includes Reddington accusing the lone holdout juror of being "biased" against those with "debilitating mental illness", which he says is a protected category. Thanks to Mark1971
Holiday Break: I've had a rough couple of weeks -- the shoulder is healing now and I'm finally getting decent sleep -- and I've decided to take a long weekend.
I'm taking Friday off, and then Monday off, too. I have Open Threads for both days and I will post if big news breaks, but if it doesn't -- and it probably won't, news is slow before a holiday weekend -- I'm going to take a four day weekend.
Sh0eOnHead discusses the Psychotic Cult of Lindsay
Real quotes: "This case has me feeling like I'm on Law & Order with you guys!" "We literally binge true crime as a hobby, we've been trained for this moment" Worth the watch. If you haven't seen the genuinely upsetting insanity motivating thousands of women, you should watch this just to see how society is crumbling. Ban TikTok, Trump. I don't care if Barron tells you it's popular with the yutes. It is an evil Communist China op and it is driving women insane.
Dolly Parton tells the story of the supposedly real-life Jolene
As Andrew Branca says, can we see this Jolene, finally? Who was this hottie that was a genuine sexual threat to Dolly Parton? I think this is Fake News personally. When a magician claims he learned a trick from a Himalayan wise man, I don't believe him either.
Peter Cullen, voice actor for Optimus Prime (among many others) dies at home surrounded by family at age 85
RIP and Roll Out!
TJM discusses the career of Mel Brooks and why High Anxiety just isn't as good as Young Frankentsein
Breaking news: Dolly Parton had a real pair of 38s
Or at least one. She carried it everywhere for protection. This joke brought to you by Benny Hill. And speaking of the British: The Buckingham Palace guard tributed her yesterday Recent Comments
mindful webworker - 'expert':
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JackStraw: ">>The risk is that there is not enough space left. ..." Mr Aspirin Factory: "Jugdish had to take a dump in the alley and hurry ..." mikeski: "[i]Adulterated cow urine. Posted by: davidt[/i] ..." Won't Catch Me There: "Between the cow pies and the people pies it must b ..." Braenyard - some Absent Friends are more equal than others _ : "Saw that odd Romeo & Juliet with Leonardo DiCaprio ..." ...: "JUST IN: Multiple world leaders have reportedly fa ..." Kindltot: "[i]How's USAID doing these days? Posted by: JackS ..." mikeski: "[i]Attack on the leaders by poisoning, or do you t ..." Bertram Cabot, Jr.: " [i]>JUST IN: Multiple world leaders have repor ..." mikeski: "[i]JUST IN: Multiple world leaders have reportedly ..." IrishEi?!: ">>>They opened a Qdoba nearby. Never ate there, pr ..." Bloggers in Arms
RI Red's Blog! Behind The Black CutJibNewsletter The Pipeline Second City Cop Talk Of The Town with Steve Noxon Belmont Club Chicago Boyz Cold Fury Da Goddess Daily Pundit Dawn Eden Day by Day (Cartoon) EduWonk Enter Stage Right The Epoch Times Grim's Hall Victor Davis Hanson Hugh Hewitt IMAO Instapundit JihadWatch Kausfiles Lileks/The Bleat Memeorandum (Metablog) Outside the Beltway Patterico's Pontifications The People's Cube Powerline RedState Reliapundit Viking Pundit WizBang Some Humorous Asides
Kaboom!
Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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