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September 30, 2004

Oliver Willis, Internet Detective

George Soros really gets his money's worth with this find.

Willis discovers that either George Bush is a criminal polygamist married to two different women, or else that there's another George Bush in the large state of Texas.

The George W. Bush and Sue Bush couple seem to have a phone number listed on Google, and seem to live in El Paso, rather than Washington DC or Crawford, but Oliver still finds it "curious."

He will get to the bottom of this nefariousness. I can guarantee you that.

Hat tip to Nick Kronos, posting at The Perfect World.

posted by Ace at 08:15 PM

Comments

The commenters over at Odub's are getting positively DU-like. I smell depseration over there. It smells like McFish-laden feces.

Posted by: Brian B on September 30, 2004 08:26 PM

What a tool...

Posted by: IgwanaRob on September 30, 2004 08:28 PM

BWAH-HA-HA-HA!!!

Posted by: zetetic on September 30, 2004 08:44 PM

What a fat, burger-swilling clown.

Posted by: Soros is my lover on September 30, 2004 08:52 PM

Go easy on Ollie.

We need Soros to keep on funding dumb lefoids. There must be some smart leftoid out there somewhere. If so we do not want him/her/it to surface.

Just leave things in Ollies capable hands.

How about: "Oh my God. Bush has two wives. Oh I hope the dems do not spend their money and resources to look too closely at this. It could be big trouble for Bush. Oh, please don' throw Bush in de ..."

Posted by: Fred Z on September 30, 2004 09:10 PM

Soros funds MediaMatters.org. What leads you to think that he has anything to do with Oliver's personal website?

Posted by: on September 30, 2004 09:42 PM

I'm sure I could find a white "Oliver Willis" on the internet, therefore proving that O-Dub is really white.

Posted by: Joe R. the Unabrewer on September 30, 2004 09:55 PM

Dude,
Check out this from the thread. A guy does a search for 'Oliver Willis' and finds multiple listings, then says:

"My point is this: *Lots* of people share the same name."

The reply?

"But do they share the same birthdate? That, my friend, is the question."

See, it's the questions man. It's all about the questions!!

Posted by: Rusty Shackleford on September 30, 2004 10:50 PM

George Soros really gets his money's worth

"Fifty bucks a month, and all the lard-fried Twinkies you can handle! Whaddya say, son...?"

Posted by: Kent on September 30, 2004 11:30 PM

Dear God, that has got to be the stupidest thing I have ever read. What does Soros pay for, if he does pay for Willis' idiocy?

Whoa, someone named George Bush is married to someone named Sue? Wow, I care about this.

Posted by: Dianna on October 1, 2004 12:03 AM

Good Lord, this is one of the stupidest things I've ever seen. As some one said, you can smell the desperation.

The blogging left is so, so very hungry to get themselves a gen-u-wine scoop (just like the one that brought down Rather) that Oliver here is twisting himeself in knots over the most ridiculous, idiotic things.

Posted by: H.D. Miller on October 1, 2004 12:34 AM

You've got, got to hope that fat fuck is joking here. Because if not, he needs an intervention, stat ("put DOWN the chalupa!"). I mean, if this was 1951 and Oliver 'Like Krispy Kreme to Atkins' Willis had found fourteen guys by the name of Dwight D Eisenhower living in Abilene, all married to different gals, maybe the pinguid oaf would have had a point. But as it is, he's just a sad, sad, nacho-cheese-covered dickhead.

Posted by: David Gillies on October 1, 2004 02:57 AM

You have got to be kidding me.

Posted by: Jordan on October 1, 2004 03:19 AM

I think the word 'pathetic' is adequate here. I'm surprised someone can be so stupid as to think there is there there and still be able to tie his shoes.

Posted by: addison on October 1, 2004 07:23 AM

Dude,
Check out this from the thread.

Do I have to?

Posted by: Joe R. the Unabrewer on October 1, 2004 08:08 AM

Let me guess, he has a TV remote and the ability to breed as well?

Posted by: Dick on October 1, 2004 09:16 AM

Fortunately, Dick, there is a very real gap between "ability to breed" as in technically possible in some abstract, hypothetical situation and "ability to breed" in a sociological sense.

Posted by: Sobek on October 1, 2004 09:54 AM

My god that fat rotting whale carcass is such a waste of space. Why does he even bother writing such meaningless prattle for all the world to see. Someone once said you can either let people think you are an ignorant fool, or open your mouth and remove all doubt. Well the fat sack of whale shit McWilliss can obviously be counted on to open open that fat quivering pie hole of his again and again. God I wish he and Mizz Moore would get together in a duel of fatness and just devour each other.

Posted by: Marty on October 1, 2004 10:40 AM

I have to agree with Marty.

Posted by: Jane on October 1, 2004 10:59 AM

More proof (as if any were needed) that the Donks are in the midst of a collective nervous breakdown due to Bush's impending reelection.

Posted by: zetetic on October 1, 2004 11:02 AM

What is also curious is Mr. Willis' arithmetic skills. The 1970 Bush was 23 in December 1970. The 1977 Bush was 31 in NOVEMBER 1977. Does he explain how someone can age 8 years between 1970 and 1977?

Posted by: Simon Oliver Lockwood on October 1, 2004 11:54 AM

Does he explain how someone can age 8 years between 1970 and 1977?

Soros investment-fund Algor-ythms? Progressive mathmatical equivalency?

Posted by: MORSteve on October 1, 2004 01:40 PM

"Soros funds MediaMatters.org. What leads you to think that he has anything to do with Oliver's personal website?"

Other than that, thanks to Soros, Moby Smirk doesn't need to get a real job that might cut into his blogging time?

Posted by: Angus Jung on October 1, 2004 02:06 PM

Question: Does he explain how someone can age 8 years between 1970 and 1977?

The Left's Online Equivalent To William Frawley Responds: "The answer to that question, obviously, is that HALIBURTON HALIBURTON CHIMP CHIMP CHIMP NAZI NAZI.

"Oliver want pie, now. Give Oliver pie, so that him have both new best friend and lover at same time. Pie. Piepiepiepiepie. Ham."

Posted by: Kent on October 1, 2004 02:46 PM

OLIVER WILLIS: "Like Cellulite To Nancy Drew." :)

Posted by: Kent on October 1, 2004 02:51 PM

Olliver Willis: Like VELCRO to Stupid.

Sobek, I think you mean the ability to breed vs the opportunity to breed.

Posted by: Ralph Gizzip on October 1, 2004 03:50 PM

My Lord. This is so damned stupid.

Yeah, Ollie, I'd run with this story. Because all these years, investigative reporters trying to find dirt on Bush never noticed he's a bigamist. I bet CBS has someone in Texas right now fabricating a marriage license. Excellent work.

For crying out loud.

Posted by: meep on October 1, 2004 04:45 PM

I think we need to get our hands on the original marriage licenses just to make sure there wasn't a typo. You know those Bushes are sooooo sneaky.

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I never noticed this before. I know Tolkien re-wrote this chapter while he was writing LOTR to make the ring important from the start. And also to make Gollum more sinister and evil, and also to remove the part where Gollum actually offers Bilbo the ring as a "present" -- Bilbo had already found it on his own, but Gollum was wiling to give it away, which obviously is not something the rewritten Gollum would ever do.
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