Saturday Night Club ONT - May 16, 2026 [D & D]

Welcome to Club ONT - a collaboration of The Disco and The Dino. Come in in, grab a drink or 3.

Did you have any action on today's Preakness Stakes? If you won anything, please consider buying a round for your fellow Hordelings!

Saturday Night Jokes and Other Funnies

A man and his wife are playing their usual course when the man slices one far right. It lands with a maintenance shed between his ball and the hole. He tells his wife to open the double doors on each end of the building and he will skull one through, saving at least a stroke.
One door on the nearest end won't stay open so he gets the wife to hold it open. He closes the club to shoot a very low shot. Unfortunately, he hits his wife in the head, killing her instantly.

Years later, same course, the man is out with friends. One of the buddies slices to almost to the same spot as before. They walk over to look at it. The buddy says he thinks he can shoot low through the building if the door is held open.

The man who tried the first shot tells him to NOT try it.

"A few years ago, I tried that shot and had to take an eight!"

(H/T - LRob in OK)

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A man received the following text from his neighbor:

“I am so sorry, Bob. I’m riddled with guilt and I have to confess. I have been tapping your wife for many weeks now. I’m not getting any at home, but that’s no excuse. I hope you will accept my sincerest apology and my promise that it won’t happen again.”

The heartbroken man, enraged, went into his bedroom, grabbed his wife, and threw her out the back door. Then he locked the door. A few moments later, a second text came in:

“Damn autocorrect. I meant WiFi, not wife.”

Drink of the Night

Tonight we feature Schlitz Beer

Why Schlitz? Because it is going away

Wisconsin Brewing Company will brew the final batch of Schlitz beer, ending the legacy of the 177-year-old beer that made Milwaukee famous.

Pabst Brewing Company discontinued Schlitz in 2026, but the company is allowing Wisconsin Brewing Company to brew a final, limited amount of the beer in Verona starting May 23.

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Brewmaster Nelson will start “The Last Schlitz” brewing at 12:30 p.m. on May 23, and the public can pre-order packs of the beer.

“The Last Schlitz” beers will be available on tap and for sale at the Verona location only on Saturday, June 27 as part of a celebration at Wisconsin Brewing Company.

Did you even realize Schlitz was still around?

Let's look back at some old Schlitz commercials

First up - from 1977 featuring a moron favorite, Teri Garr

Here's a dramatic one from 1971

According to The Commodores - Beer makes it good, Schlitz makes it great!

Finishing up with a little Steely Dan!

So long, Schlitz!

Club ONT Department of the Future

Club ONT Department of Saying it Without Saying It

Club ONT Restroom Envy

Club ONT Department of Smarts

All Aboard for the Club ONT Jukebox

Top 10ish Comments of the Week

Club ONT is brought to you tonight by: Career downgrades

Beneath this neon thread where morons play,
Management disclaims all woes come dawn—
The filters lost, the dances gone astray,
The friendships forged (or shattered) before yawn. Opinions here are chaos dressed as wit,
Half brilliance, half the bottle’s reckless fire.
What lingers in Club ONT stays hid…
Unless it’s gold—then we’ll retell it higher. So raise your glass, you glorious, rowdy crew,
Tip the ghost who poured your final round.
Sleep deep, dream weird, and wake renewed—
We’ll save your seat when Saturday rolls ’round.

posted by Open Blogger at 10:00 PM

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