NYT advises that "material offered as proof by these veterans is undercut by official Navy records".

So nuancy-boy, who bitterly denounced the American military as "war criminals", "reminiscent of Genghis Khan", and that paragon of objective journalism, the New York Times, now cravenly cower behind the records of that same military they both loathe.

Shameless. I had Kerry pegged for 12 states; you'll be lucky to get 10 now, nuancy-boy.

Um, close the italics tag?

Thanks. I fixed that.

Hey Ace,

Is there anyway you could put the Top Ten back the way it was for a sec? I was in the middle of quoting it, and I'm not changing my commentary at this late stage. You can maul it again when I'm done.

Please?

Thanks.

ummm... sorry, I can't. It's down the memory hole already.

If you tell me which number you're quoting, I can figure out the way it used to be, and tell you the old version.

Although several of the entries have changed multiple times.

you could also just quote the line as you had it, then state your commentary.

I think everyone will get it.

...farting in --- holes?

Oh, yeah. I changed that because I came up with a better dump-joke.

The old version was something like:

John Forbes Kerry enjoys the pasttimes of the idle rich, such as "kite-surfing" and "extreme biking"; Bigfoot prefers the diversions of the common man, such as farting in golpher holes

I did have a good snortsnicker at "farting in gopher holes." That's just wacky.

Gopher, right. I figured it was probably you wanted a balance of scat, old-switcheroos, etc.

It was, I think--to waste some of your time--the replacement of a funny line for the removal of the funniest one. But I'll live.

Thanks though.

hmmmmmmm...

Well, maybe I could lose a weaker one. I've already got a wiping the ass joke; I figured it was stretching it to have booth a poop and a fart joke.

I'll see about sticking it back in.

Okay, I lost the Intelligence committee line (true, but not funny), changed the "took a dump" line to work in a masturbation joke (hadn't used up my jackoff joke quota) and then reinserted the gopher hole line.

Thanks for the editorial comments. So much more helpful than I DON'T GET IT.

Good Yontif.

Link here.

[link edited by ace]

Ah, the wonderment of the editorial process...

Foghat. Foghat!

Now that's quality. That's why I keep coming round here.

Damn Ace, you're a master of comedy.

From the article:
---Quote---
Several of those now declaring Mr. Kerry "unfit" had lavished praise on him, some as recently as last year.
---End Quote---

This is a bad thing? Isn't it the same sort of nuance that would lead someone to go to Vietnam, then return home and portray U.S. forces in Vietnam as war criminals, and finally run for President on one's Vietnam record?

I DONT GET IT! IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY? I THINK MOST PEOPLE RELATE GEORGE "CHIMPY" BUSH TO BIGFOOT THAN KERRY. CAN YOU EDIT THAT?

/usatoday

Thanks, all. Much appreciated.

Blaster,

Yeah, Foghat is an awesome punchline. I just used that reference last month, and so I was trying to come up with something else, but really, you just can't beat Foghat, used before or not.

Bigfoot once masturbated behind a Portland SuperCuts

Sorry, no, that was actually Rasheed Wallace before the trade. The mistake's understandable.

How about...

Bigfoot's foreign policy is "eat it, screw it, or piss on it", JFK's is the same except is starts with "Check with the French"...

Kerry went to St. Paul's not Andover. Otherwise, sweet.