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| Senator John Forbes Kerry: "Like a Caged Hamster" »
June 15, 2004
Is That a Nude Robert Reich In Your Pocket, Or Are You Just Happy to See Me?He da sexy. Ooh, jinkies, he da sexy. He's a very, very hot man -- smokin' hot, the kind of man that gives even straight men like myself the dirty-kinky goosebumps o' love -- and I'm sure we're all quite satisfied that Bill Clinton did not appoint a certifiable maniac to his cabinet. Update: I've been chewing this over. And I want to know: What the fuck?!?! What the fuck is up with our former Secretary of Labor,, and a very strange and homely looking midget, posing naked for a calendar? What the fuck? Update: I mean seriously: What the fucking fuck?!!? Update: Okay. Now stop jerking me around. I'm going to ask this one more fucking time: What the fucking fuck is fucking going on in the fucking world?! posted by Ace at 05:08 PM
CommentsWhat you're not turned on?! My lust grew so strong that my wife made me turn off the TV when the Lollipop League showed up in the Wizard of Oz. Posted by: JFH on June 15, 2004 05:24 PM
Settle down Ace and be grateful it wasnt worse. four words: Madaleine Albright, Janet Reno. I'm sorry that's not a mental image I want to be imposing on people. Think happy thoughts, John Kerry giving his concession speach, Economic Boom, more cowbell. Posted by: Big E on June 15, 2004 05:28 PM
Posted by: Mr. Smithers on June 15, 2004 05:32 PM
Update: Okay. Now stop jerking me around. I'm going to ask this one more fucking time: What the fucking fuck is fucking going on in the fucking world?! Fuck if I know. Posted by: Senator PhilABuster on June 15, 2004 05:36 PM
OOooh..... Oompa Loompas! uhnm...oooh Yes!!!! Posted by: Dave Pasquino on June 15, 2004 05:43 PM
Robert Reich thought balloon: "Dammit! That Bill Clinton thinks he's just *so* *damn* *cool*. What with his National Enquirer articles about Monica and Ken Starr investigating him. Well! I'll just show him. How's this? Am I hot? Is this the kind of He-Man beefcake you're looking for? Is it? IS IT?" Posted by: on June 15, 2004 06:00 PM
Ace, it's just a lot of loose shit. This is when you need Mr. Paul Anka to, shall we say, regulate... Posted by: Kahuna on June 15, 2004 06:16 PM
Not gay at all. Not that there's anything wrong with being gay, mind you. Posted by: Iblis on June 15, 2004 06:21 PM
I can't separate this story from the caged hamster story. You can imagine my mental dilema. I read once of some Indian holy man who was able to blind his mind's eye by mentally masturbating for seven straight days. Lucky holy bastard. Posted by: Jeff G on June 15, 2004 06:26 PM
Ace, You've been reading PJ O'Rourke, haven't you? Posted by: Brian B on June 15, 2004 06:28 PM
Brian, Actually, no. Am I channelling him? Posted by: ace on June 15, 2004 07:45 PM
Ace, Yes, The phrase "What the fuck? I mean, what the fucking fuck?" is directly out of Parliament of Whores. Posted by: Brian B on June 15, 2004 08:06 PM
I second the motion to get Mr. Paul Anka to "put us some fucking knowledge here." Posted by: Kerry Is Unelectable on June 15, 2004 08:09 PM
Ha. Oh yeah. Isn't that where he's explaining the budget mess, and he's telling you about some goofy payment to farmers, and then he says, "I'm sure you must now have some questions. Ask them," and the first question from "you the reader" is "Q. What the fuck?!! What the fucking fuck, man?!" Gee. I guess I did steal that, didn't I? Posted by: ace on June 15, 2004 08:11 PM
Yup, that's the one. That book should be required reading for any college 100-level civics class. Posted by: Brian B on June 15, 2004 08:22 PM
Ew. Posted by: zetetic on June 15, 2004 11:31 PM
I just bafred a little in my mouth. Posted by: Beck on June 16, 2004 05:35 AM
That is the ugliest little fucker I have ever seen in my life. What the hell is he thinking? I must say Janet Reno or Maddy HalfBright would have been worse. Well they certainly would be more masculine, than that mincing little fairy. Of course he looks more like a troll in that picture. Posted by: Marty on June 16, 2004 08:31 AM
SpongeRob NoPants Posted by: sentinel on June 16, 2004 08:42 AM
The quote from "Parliament of Whores" is from the S&L bailout chapter. Am i imagining things or are the loaf of bread and lettuce supposed to be representative of Reich's package? Posted by: golden boy on June 16, 2004 08:44 AM
I'm calling Vinny Pascone. Posted by: lauraw on June 16, 2004 10:03 AM
Eh- that's 'Falcone, Vinny Falcone.' Posted by: lauraw on June 16, 2004 10:04 AM
there's lots of loose shit going on here... Posted by: hobgoblin on June 16, 2004 01:42 PM
Suggestion: stop chewing. Gosh, I miss college. Posted by: charles austin on June 16, 2004 02:16 PM
I am grateful that this time I was not imbibing a liquid as I read this. Posted by: Sailor Kenshin on June 16, 2004 03:43 PM
And we must all kneel and thank G-d that this picture didn't include Michael Moore as his Baguette Buddy. There are limits, after all. Posted by: Mamamontezz on June 17, 2004 05:41 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
Lurker extraordinaire announces impending surgery: Victor Davis Hanson: 'Not Yet and Not Today'
Best wishes for a speedy recovery! [CBD]
Trump Says 'We Have the Makings' of a Peace Deal in Ukraine It sounds nice, but please take Winston Wolf's advice. [CBD]
Brigitte Bardot, Star of 'And God Created Women' and 'Contempt,' Dies at 91
If you have forgotten what she looked like, try this. [CBD]
This isn't Christmas Eve fare, and I thought about waiting until the 26th to post it, but supposedly an amateur detective has solved the Zodiac killer mystery. And the horrific Black Dahlia killing. He says it's the same person! I always thought of them as very far apart in time but I think Black Dahlia was mid-fifties (nope, 1947) mid and the Zodiac murders began in 1968 so it's possible it's the same killer.
The killer, if it's the same man, would have been in his 20s when he killed the Black Dahlia and his 40s when he did the Zodiac murders. Possible. A little caveat: I saw someone snark on Reddit, "The Zodiac case gets solved more often than Wordle." There are a ton of coincidences here, supposedly, like a Zodiac cipher being solved by the name "Elizabeth." Elizabeth Short was the name of the so-called Black Dahlia. If you don't know about the Black Dahlia, don't look it up. Just accept that it's grisly on the level of Jack the Ripper. Yes, the named suspect resembles the police sketch of Zodiac. Here's a podcast with the amateur sleuth who claims he cracked the Zodiac. Daily Mail article. Link to get around the LA Times' paywall for their article.
Former Republican liberal Ben Sasse announces that he has stage IV metastasized pancreatic cancer: "I'm gonna die"
It's not just a "death sentence," as he says, but a rapidly coming one. I hope he can put his affairs in order and make sure his family is in a good as a position as they can be.
Brown killer takes the coward's way out. Naturally.
Still not identified, for some reason. Per Fox 25 Boston, the killer was a non-citizen permanent legal resident It continues to be strange that the police are so protective of his identity.
Fearful French cancel NYE concert on Champs-Élysées as migrant violence grows
The time is now! France must fight for its culture! [CBD]
Megyn Kelly finally calls out Candace Owens
Whoops, I meant she bravely attacks Sydney Sweeney for "bending the knee." (Sweeney put out a very empty PR statement saying "I'm against hate." Whoop-de-doo.) Megyn Kelly claims she doesn't want to call people out on the right when asked about Candace Owens but then has no compunctions at all about calling people out on the right. As long as they're not Candace Owens. Strangely, she seems blind and deaf to anything Candace Owens says. That's why this woman calls her "Megyn Keller." She's now asking her pay-pigs in Pakistan how they think she should address the Candace Owens situation, and if they think this is really all about Israel and the Jews.
The World Must Stop Ignoring What Iranians Already Know: The Regime Is on the Brink
Isn't it pretty to think so? [CBD]
I have happily forgotten what Milo Yiannopoulos sounds like, but I still enjoyed this impression from from Ami Kozak.
More revelations about the least-sexy broken relationship in media history
I'd wanted to review Parts 2, 3, and 4 of Ryan Lizza's revenge posts about Olivia Nuzzi, but they're all paywalled. I thought about briefly subscribing to get at them, but then I read this in Part 2: Remember the bamboo from Part 1? Do I ever! It's all I remember! Well, bamboo is actually a type of grass, and underground, it's all connected in a sprawling network, just like the parts of this story I never wanted to tell. I wish I hadn't been put in this position, that I didn't have to write about any of this, that I didn't have to subject myself or my loved ones to embarrassment and further loss of privacy. We're back to the fucking bamboo. Guys, I don't think I can pay for bamboo ruminations. I think he added that because he was embarrassed about all the bamboo imagery from Part 1. He's justifying his twin obsessions: His ex, and bamboo. Which is not a tree but a kind of grass, he'll have you know. Recent Comments
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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