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Tuesday Overnight Open Thread - March 31, 2026 [Doof]
Tuesday Cafe Quick Hits Supreme Court Rules That Free Speech Still Exists; Ketanji Brown Jackson Doesn't Understand Kristi Noem's Husband Is a Not-So-Secret Crossdresser Who Adorns Himself With Ridiculous Fake Breasts Woe Canada: Canada Now Running Benetton-Style Fashion Ads Urging Its Sick Citizens to Present Themselves Before the Suicide Booths for a Quick and Easy (and Cheap for the Canadian Welfare State) Exit from This Life Trump To Cowardly Countries Complaining They Can't Get Their Oil Through the Strait of Hormuz: If You Want Your Oil, Send In Your Navy and Take It Yourselves, Tough-Guys Providence Mayor Calls Mural Showing Face of Slaughtered Iryna Zarutska "Divisive," Wants It Taken Down Michigan Synagogue Attack Was "Hezballah-Inspired," Says FBI The Morning Rant: Spain Is Lost Absent Friends
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June 02, 2004
Economic Forecast: Sunny With a 85% Chance of Cowbell"Over 200,000" new jobs created this past May, according to economists: WASHINGTON (Reuters) - U.S. employment likely surged again in May, analysts said on Wednesday, cementing expectations the Federal Reserve (news - web sites) will raise interest rates this month and buoying President Bush (news - web sites)'s election hopes. Economists believe more than 200,000 jobs were created last month, building on the 625,000 added in March and April, as employers geared up to meet robust demand after three long years of layoffs and tepid hiring. 375,000 is an awful lot of jobs, but by gum, it sure would be nice to be able to say "one million jobs in three months." While the roaring employment gains in March and April surprised most observers, who had been disappointed by the slow recovery from the 2001 recession, analysts have been quick to embrace the new rosier jobs outlook. "I'm swinging for the fence this week," said ClearView Economics president Ken Mayland, predicting 300,000 jobs were created last month. "There's just every indication that the labor market is improving very dramatically." Swing, baby. Can I get a 375,000? No? Just 300,000? Damn your conservative estimate, Mr. Mayland. The Labor Department (news - web sites)'s closely watched payrolls report, due on Friday, is expected to show 216,000 new jobs in May, according to a Reuters survey of economists. They've lowballed in estimating the last three months' jobs growth. They might have finally caught up. But maybe not. ... Economists said while job growth below 125,000 could erode market confidence in the hiring rebound, some moderation of growth after March and April is expected. Forecasts in the Reuters survey of 24 analysts ranged from 140,000 to 300,000 new jobs. ... Difficult to do, yes. Especially since everytime I turn around they up the number of jobs Bush supposedly "lost," despite the fact that he's been adding jobs to the economy for half a year. Small cowbell, because no one should count their cowbells before they're hatched:
Now That's Good Bias Update: Only tangentially relevant, but this asinine piece from the liberal advocacy journal Newsweek reeks with partisan bias. Basically, this idiot lays out four scenarios for the upcoming election. In two, Bush loses. Fine. In one, Bush wins only because of Nader. And in the other, Bush wins only because he incompetently allows Al Qaeda to strike us again, which drives the moronic masses to vote for him. Apparently there's no conceivable scenario, according to Newsweek, where Bush wins re-election because the economy is booming and Iraq is fairly stable, or because John Kerry is judged to be too liberal for the voting public. Can't happen. He announces his "four plausible" scenarios, and then gives us a reverse-Gore scenario in which Bush wins the popular vote but loses the electoral college. Presumably, that is more "plausible" than the public simply preferring Bush over Kerry. Don't bother clicking on the link. It's not worth reading. Cowbell Update: No fan of the cowbell can afford to miss Son of Nixon's exhaustive set of cowbell links. Including an interview with the guy who actually played the cowbell on Blue Oyster Cult's Don't Fear the Reaper. No, his name's not Gene Frankel, and he's not dead. But he is a big fan of the sketch. Here's a sample: "It was completely fiction," Bloom said, laughing, "but that's what kind of made it bizarre. They made it all up. Funny thing is, the actor who plays the cowbell guy - Will Ferrell - he's got a name at the end and it says he died. I've had people come up to me and ask, 'What happened to that guy who died?' I'm like, 'Uh, there was no guy that died. It was all fiction from beginning to end.' And Bruce Dickinson is a real guy, but he has nothing to do with 'Don't Fear (The Reaper).' He works for Sony and he's in charge of the production and remastering of all our old albums. He had nothing to do with the original 1976 'Don't Fear (The Reaper).' "Of course now, every time somebody talks to Bruce on the phone, they say, 'Is this superstar record producer Bruce Dickinson?' " And Yet the Updates Continue: CEO's agree: Economy strengthening. Survey says 38% of CEO's expect to add workers; only 19% anticipate shedding workers. posted by Ace at 04:45 PM
CommentsWhats the Cowbell plan for when Bush wins? Posted by: Golden Boy on June 2, 2004 04:56 PM
I don't know. Maybe I'll get legendary rock-producer Bruce Dickenson to co-host the site for a week, with special guests Paul Anka and "John." Whatever I end up doing, it'll be pretty lame compared to the good news. I expect there'll be lots of gloating. Lots and lots and lots of gloating. Evil, snickering, Gollum-type gloating. I also think it might be funny to organize a Victory Run through lefty blogs. Maybe I can organize a hundred or so people to "blog-jog" from lefty site to lefty site, just leaving little "Hi, how ya doin'?"'s in the comments. We can pick up cups of water at Oliver Willis, "Orsinus," then maybe the Kos. Posted by: ace on June 2, 2004 05:10 PM
Heck, I'm in. Posted by: Nathan on June 2, 2004 05:28 PM
Count me in too. You know they'll be swarming the right-wing blogs if Horsface wins/steals the election. Posted by: Golden Boy on June 2, 2004 06:27 PM
Don't forget that the monthly job estimates are accompanied by revised numbers for the previous months. We might not need 375,000 for May to reach the Big Cowbell. Posted by: Paul Zrimsek on June 2, 2004 06:44 PM
I pray that the Bush Victory Blog-Run becomes a reality. I nominate myself to play the role of Paul Revere, except I'll be on my computer, leaving cowbell "sounds" -- tik tuk tik tuk -- on every site and I won't be screaming "the British are coming" I'll --- Y'know. Fuck it. That Paul Revere thing doesn't make any goddamn sense. I'm still stunned from Ace's "True Tales of The Testes" post that he put up earlier. Posted by: sonofnixon on June 2, 2004 08:36 PM
hey ace, check out the Boston Herald story I found where some asshole actually imitated one of the Abu Ghraib photos downtown in front of a Military Recruitment Center....haven't found an "actual" photo from this protest/"art" display yet.... Posted by: sonofnixon on June 2, 2004 09:39 PM
Ooh, I've got it! We'll all post "Don't fear the reaper!" And then sonofnixon can come in and do the cowbell onomatopoeia. Posted by: Smack on June 2, 2004 11:25 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
What? Skeleton of the most famous Musketeer, D'Artagnan, possibly discovered in Dutch church closet.
Dumas picked four names of real musketeers out of a history book, D'Artagnan, Athos, Aramis, and Porthos. So there was an actual D'Artagnan, though he made most of the story up. (Or, you know, all of it.)* Charles de Batz de Castelmore, known as d'Artagnan, the famous musketeer of Kings Louis XIII and Louis XIV, spent his life in the service of the French crown. A lot of Dumas's stories are based on bits of real history. The plot of the >Three Musketeers, about trying to recover lost diamonds from the queen's necklace, was cribbed from the then-almost-contemporaneous Affair of the Queen's Necklace. And the Man in the Iron Mask is based on real accounts of a prisoner forced to wear a mask (though I think it was a velvet mask). * Oh, I should mention, Dumas says all this, about finding the names in an old book, in the prologue to his novel. But authors lie a lot. They frequently present fictions as based on historic fact. The twist is, he was actually telling the truth here. At least about these four musketeers having actually existed and served under Louis XIV. Fun fact: You know the beginning of A Fistful of Dollars where the local gunslingers make fun of Clint Eastwood's donkey and Eastwood demands they apologize to the donkey? That's lifted from The Three Musketeers. Rochefort mocks D'Artagnan's old, brokedown farm horse and D'Artagnan is incensed.
A commenter asked which should be read first, The Hobbit of LOTR?
Easy, no question -- read The Hobbit first. It's actually the start of the story and comes first chronologically. It sets up some major characters and major pieces in play in LOTR. Also, the Hobbit is Beginner-Friendly, which LOTR isn't. The Hobbit really is a delightful book, and a fast read. It's chatty, it's casual, it's exciting, and it's funny. In that dry cheeky British humor way. I love that the narrator is constantly making little asides and commentary, like he's just sitting next to you telling you this story as it occurs to him. LOTR is a very long story. Fifteen hundred pages or so. The Hobbit is relatively short and very punchy and easy to read. If you don't like The Hobbit, you can skip out on LOTR. If you do like it, you'll be primed to read LOTR. Oh, I should say: The Hobbit is written as if it's for children, but one of those smart children's stories that are also for adults. Don't worry, there's also real fighting and violence and horror in it, too. LOTR is written for adults. (It's said that Tolkien wrote both for his children, but LOTR was written 17 years later, when his children were adults.) Some might not like The Hobbit due to its sometimes frivolous tone. Me, I love it. I find it constantly amusing. Both are really good but there is a starkly different tone to both. LOTR is epic, grand, and serious, about a world war, The Hobbit is light and breezy, and about a heist. Though a heist that culminates in a war for the spoils.
The Hobbit Challenge: Read two more chapters. I didn't have much time. Bilbo got the ring.
I noticed a continuity problem. Maybe. Now, as of the time of The Hobbit, it was unknown that this magic ring was in fact a Ring of Power, and it was doubly unknown that it was the Ring of Power, the Master Ring that controlled the others. But the narrator -- who we will learn in LOTR was none of than Bilbo himself, who wrote the book as "There and Back Again" -- says this about Gollum's ring: "But who knows how Gollum had come by that present [the Ring], ages ago in the old days when such rings were still at large in the world? Perhaps even the Master who ruled them could not have said." In another passage, the ring is identified as a "ring of power." I don't know, I always thought there was a distinction between mere magic rings and the Rings of Power created by Sauron. But this suggests that Bilbo knew this was a ring of power created by Sauron. Now I don't remember when Bilbo wrote the Hobbit. In the movie, he shows Frodo the book in Rivendell, and I guess he wrote it after he left the Shire. I guess he might have added in the part about the ring being a ring of power created by "the Master" after Gandalf appraised him of his research into the ring. I never noticed this before. I know Tolkien re-wrote this chapter while he was writing LOTR to make the ring important from the start. And also to make Gollum more sinister and evil, and also to remove the part where Gollum actually offers Bilbo the ring as a "present" -- Bilbo had already found it on his own, but Gollum was wiling to give it away, which obviously is not something the rewritten Gollum would ever do. But I had no memory of the ring being suggested to be The Ring so early in the tale.
Finish the job, Mr. President!
Melanie Phillips lays out the case for the total destruction of the Iranian government and armed forces. [CBD]
Oh, I forgot to mention this quote from Pete Hegseth, reported by Roger Kimball: "We are sharing the ocean with the Iranian Navy. We're giving them the bottom half."
Batman fires The Batman
Batman is disgusted by the Joachim Phoenix version of Joker Batman tries to fire Superman Batman is still workshopping his Bat-Voice
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: Red Leather Suit and Sweatband Edition
And I was here to please I'm even on knees Makin' love to whoever I please I gotta do it my way Or no way at all
Tomorrow is March 25th, "Tolkien Reading Day," because March 25th is the day when the Ring is destroyed in the book. I think I'm going to start the Hobbit tomorrow and read all four books this time.
The only bad part of the trilogy are the Frodo/Sam chapters in The Two Towers. They're repetitive, slow, and mostly about the weather and terrain. But most everything else is good. Weirdly, the Frodo-Sam chapters in Return of the King are exciting and action-packed and among the best in the trilogy. (Though the chapters with everyone else in Return of the King get pretty slow again. Mostly people talking about marching towards war, and then marching towards war.)
Sec. Army recognizes ODU Army ROTC cadets for their bravery and sacrifice in private ceremony
[Hat Tip: Diogenes] [CBD]
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click
One day I'm gonna write a poem in a letter One day I'm gonna get that faculty together Remember that everybody has to wait in line Oh, [Song Title], look out world, oh, you know I've got mine
US decimation of Iran's ICBM forces is due to Space Force's instant detection of launches -- and the launchers' hiding places -- and rapid counter-attack via missiles
AI is doing a lot of the work in analyzing images to find the exact hiding place of the launchers. Counter-strikes are now coming in four hours after a launch, whereas previously it might have taken days for humans to go over the imagery and data.
Robert Mueller, Former Special Counsel Who Probed Trump, Dies
“robert mueller just died,” trump wrote in a truth social post on march 21. “good, i’m glad he’s dead. he can no longer hurt innocent people! president donald j. trump.”
Canadian School Designates Cafeteria And Lunchroom As "No Food Zones" For Ramadan
Canada and the UK are neck and neck in the race to become the first western country to fall to Islam [CBD] Recent Comments
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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