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« Iran Relocating Financial Assets. | Main | The "Truth" Behind SluBlog's Whale »
January 20, 2006

Whale in the River Thames

A whale swims merrily through the heart of London:

LONDON, England -- Fears are growing among marine experts after what is believed to be a Northern Bottle-nosed Whale was spotted swimming in the River Thames in the heart of London.

One whale rescuer, Tony Martin, said that such whales were normally only found in very deep water and would require a specialist rescue operation.

"This is a unique experience. Northern Bottle-nosed Whales are normally only found in very deep water so the fact it's here probably means it's ill. This is going to take a number of boats and organization to coax it back into deeper water," Martin told Sky News on Friday.

"This is not going to be an easy job."

I blame global warming.

And George W. Bush.

Goes without saying, really.


posted by Slublog at 10:15 AM
Comments



This is going to take a number of boats and organization to coax it back into deeper water," Martin told Sky News on Friday.

Or they could harpoon it. Just a thought.

Posted by: Alex_fs on January 20, 2006 10:19 AM

Bet it tastes just like chicken....

Posted by: Retread on January 20, 2006 10:36 AM

The rescue has been called off. Turns out it was just Rosie O'Donnell.

Posted by: TallDave on January 20, 2006 10:39 AM

I blame the Jooooooooooooooooos

Posted by: Cedarford's Ghost on January 20, 2006 10:51 AM

They should call in Greenpeace, they would have it out of the Thames and double parked in front of a Japanese embassy in no time.

Posted by: scott on January 20, 2006 10:54 AM

Northern Bottle-nosed Whales are normally only found in very deep water so the fact it's here probably means it's ill. This is going to take a number of boats and organization to coax it back into deeper water

Or you could, ya know, try to cure it before you coaxed it back into deep water.

Posted by: JackStraw on January 20, 2006 10:56 AM

I think the real news here is that it's been centuries since the Thames was last clean enough that a whale would even try this.

Posted by: Anachronda on January 20, 2006 11:15 AM

Yeah - y'all have no idea how much plastic explosive you can stuff into a bottle-nose whale, do you?

Has anybody stopped to consider that Osama bin-Laden might be in international waters doing cetacean research?

And not the good kind of research either, the kind that makes 'Day of the Dolphin" look like a walk in the park.

I say "don't let that whale near a bridge or any port/dock/oil tranfer locations'

That's what I say.

Posted by: BumperStickerist on January 20, 2006 11:22 AM

Yeah - y'all have no idea how much plastic explosive you can stuff into a bottle-nose whale, do you?

No, but Dave Barry does.

Posted by: Anachronda on January 20, 2006 11:25 AM

Whale of a Tale!!

Posted by: rls on January 20, 2006 11:40 AM

Actually this may be related to the much improved water quality of the Thames. (I know it still looks brown, but that's the silt).

I've been going to London on a fairly regular basis for about 20 years and the water is much improved (as is the smell) due to sensible pollution controls.

Fish stocks have improved and water birds (herons, cormarants, etc) are fairly common in London.

Posted by: Red Jode on January 20, 2006 11:44 AM

It's Cheney's hammer out for a swim, isn't it?

Posted by: spongeworthy on January 20, 2006 12:49 PM

A rescue boat has been sent to protect the whale and rescuers have been trying to keep it away from the river banks.

I didn't even know whales had pockets.

Posted by: CraigC on January 20, 2006 12:59 PM

Poor thing probably got confused when it started tracking the electro-magnetic impulses given off from Dick Cheney's cock.

My guess is it was shooting for the Potomac.

Posted by: Chad on January 20, 2006 01:20 PM

. . . to be indicted as ecoterrorists according to british authorities.

Posted by: Rich on January 20, 2006 03:59 PM

"This is not going to be an easy job."

I know, I just tried googling for "whale recipes" and I didn't find anything good. Where do they begin?

Posted by: Sortelli on January 20, 2006 04:24 PM

I like my oceans equatorial Oooo....
Where the water's warm and the breeze less boreal Oooo....
It's Fahrenheit minus twenty-nine, and I don't know what to do.
A rubbery, blubbery bottle-nosed whale,
The bottle-nosed whale with the flu...
ch oo-ch oo-ch oo-ah Tshcoo....

Posted by: Pixy Misa on January 20, 2006 06:23 PM

They are tired of the whale watchers their tired of the eco-freaks

Posted by: spurwing plover on January 20, 2006 11:46 PM
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