I used to work at a KFC chicken processing plant. No way can you be cruel to a vegatable with feet. Chickens are dumber than dirt and are very tasty. A good combination.

Did you here about the aggie who dropped his chewing gum in the chicken barn?

He thought he found it... three times.

Then... he picked it up and chewed the shit out of it.

"Gaelic" sounds funny when you say it out loud.

I've been reading Ace for a few years now, and his anonymity has been a given. Is he coming out, a la Wretchard of Belmont Club as Richard Fernandez? Or is Steve McCutcheon some in-joke I missed?

Best. Post. Ever.

Everytime you say Thanks to Allah or Via Allah all I see is Allah Akbar.

I'm thinking of legally changing my name to PersonEatingTastyAnimals.com.

"Steve McCutcheon" is the alias I use when someone forces me to give a fake name besides "Ace." I usually tell them that's a fake name too, but a lot of people don't want to call me Ace. So they call me by another fake name.

Ace, we hardly knew ye.

PETA must consist of some of the most rediclous people ever then who else would run around in dopey costumes acting like idiots thinks animals have rights when they dont at all i mean PETA tried to convince kids against fishing by using parts from the movie FINDING NEMO and show up at a school in their rediclous protest they even show one in a dopey chicken costume over the BIRD FLU issue. PETA is just foe those whos brains must be the size of walnuts

Holy shit, Batman! Why the one period, and why in that particular place?

Spur's thought-process genuinely intrigues me. At this point, I am convinced the monicker spurwing plover doesn't mean what s/he thinks it means. The real question is: What the hell does Spur think it means?

"I'll be observing from the helicopter while Bart tries to attach the radio collar to spurwing plover. Note the brightly colored flaps of skin that flare up from each side of his head when he senses Bart's approach. Look out for that tail, Bart, that thing could really mess up your legs if he hits you with it."

It's me, not Bart...

glorrk

They are terrorists. Anyone who puts the welfare of animals above human beings is demented and irrational.

OMG Rolling out of my chair here and my cube mates think i'm outa my gord

I finally get a chance to tell this story. My wife and I visited our families over Christmas. When we went to her family, my wife needed a warmer coat so she borrowed a fur coat from my mom.

We went to her sister's house. My sister in law is a certifiable moon bat. At one point she notices the jacket on the coat rack.

At which point she grabs the coat and rudely asks, " WHOSE COAT IS THIS?" I happened to be right there and said, "It's my wife's"

She then asks, "IS THIS FUR? REAL FUR?"

By now I'm ready and I can't resist, "I said yes it is fur. It's SEAL fur. BABY seal fur. In fact freshly clubbed seal fur."

Now she is apoplectic, she is so upset she is stammering, "You You You're kidding right? YYYOu're not serious right? It's not really fur is it? It feels like fur, but but but Kathy would NEVER wear real fur."

I said, "Well it is seal fur, but no it's not freshly clubbed. It's my grandmother's and it's at least 60 years old."

She dropped it on the floor like it was going to burn her skin, and refused to talk to me for the rest of the day. No real loss there actually.

She later told my wife to watch out for people throwing red paint on her.

How did her fake moral outrage taste, Eric?

Was it gooey and sweet, like a holiday pie?

Or spicy and tangy like buffalo wings?

Either way, delicious as all hell, am I right?

I dare you to send your sister-in-law something like this:

http://vinceautmorire.mu.nu/archives/147446.php

C'mon. Steve McCutcheon? Where's the Gaellic in that. I thought you had some great middle name like "Dick Cheney's dick is small potatoes compared to the great Ace of Spades member". Spoken as Bigeh Dickeh.

Or something like that. I expect a little more imagination out of you Steve, er Ace!

Subsunk

Fake moral outrage is a dish best served warm and snuggly, kind of like the warm and snuggly feeling you get while wrapped in a mink coat.

PETA founder INGRID NEWKIRK has said A RAT IS A PIG A DOG IS A BOY thats a insult to anyone it proves that PETA is a radical bunch of extremists pushing the new age idea of animal worship PETA are a bunch of radical animal worshipers

Good for you, Eric. I've got a relative who is a professor at Michigan State, so you can guess where she falls in the ideological spectrum. She even called my father a "fool" for voting for W. My dad told me he would love to get her and I in the same room sometime, although he concedes he would never be able to speak to that part of the family again. Family or not, I would give the bitch both barrels.

With this BIRD FLU threat going on these PETA jerks have been showing just how rediclous they can get they have been setting up at KFC restrants one in a dopey chicken costume and uring us all to be vegetarians what a bunch of idiots i mean when it comes to bird brains there are some more intellegent then the others