Gah! I guess they're trying to rehabilitate the image of Denise Richards, previously the most ridiculous Bond Girl in the history of the series.

Just the memory of her trying to say stuff like "I'm a nuclear physicist!" in that squeaky voice....

The franchise is already dead.

David C. beat me to the obvious Denise Richards parallel.

The only rationale I can think of for casting Denise Richards as a nuclear physicist is that it made the physical stunts look much more plausible by comparison.

Might as well go ahead and make Tom Cruise the next 007 while they're at it.

Jessica Simpson has some minimal singing talent BUT her major qualification would seem to be her physical appearance - and that just is NOT enough to qualify her for a part as a Bond girl.

And just a question to y'all - does anyone besides me find it unbearably creepy that Jessica Simpson's father feels called upon to wax enthusiastic about his eldest daughter's bra size? And he's a minister? Ye gads!

I must admit that although I was never a fan of hers, I was even less so after Daddy ran his mouth. Ick!

Whatever happened to casting an unknown European model? Did Maryam D'Abo kill that whole idea for good?

If they are going with "known" actresses, they still have a long, long list to work through before they hit the likes of Jessica Simpson.

Denise Richards is going to look like Diana Rigg by comparison.

I agree with Slublog. The franchise is already gone.

Poor Denise Richards. She should fire her agent for even suggesting the role. She's okay to look at, but even with her limited thinking capacity you'd imagine that her first reaction to being offered the role of a nuclear physicist would be, "are you kidding?"

Sort of how in teen "late-blooming" dramedies, the boy/girl just needs to take their glasses off and learn to dance/let their hair down and suddenly they're the Royalty at the Prom. It's not really believable.

Given recent revelations, can we not use the AoSHQ as a forum by which to promote Chris Klein as the next James Bond, on the condition that he act as himself in the role?

Can't you see him?

"Martini, shaken not stirred? Thanks for the attention, Moneypenny, but get out of my face. That drink brings nothing to the table. What I want is an Appletini. Nothing quite says post-pubescent"Alpha-heterosexual" like a well made Appletini. And no, you aren't looking that hot today. In fact, at your best you are probably only a 7-7.5 and I only bed 8-10's. That's why we won't ever hook up."

Yeah, yeah. I know. Too fey.

Don't make somebody a Bond girl who has a man-face. Where's the common sense here?

..and here I thought I'd bring up Denise Richards. Looks like I was well beaten to it though.

Must....resist....lesbo....angle....can't.....help.....mySEEELLLFFFFF -- WhynotbringbackDeniseRichardsandcastNeveCampbellaswell?

Sorry, my throbbing Cheneyhood made me do it.

i try to like the Bond movies, i really do, but there is just too much silly shit in them. take "teh Man with the Golden Gun"-- cool movie right?

Remember the car chase scene with the flying AMC Pacer? See I got no problem with the Flying Pacer- my problem is with the slide whistle being played whenever Bond made a big dukes of hazzard style jump. A fuckin slide whistle. It sounded like a clown had hidden in the back of his trunk.

Britt Ekland was the hottest Bond Girl.

Nice try. It was Honor Blackman. Hottest Bond girl ever.

I'm sure I'm an exception here, but I thought the Timothy Dalton movies had the potential to be a return to form...gritty, cool Bond toys that weren't too far over the top, an angry Bond. Too bad the movies sucked sooooo bad. Bad scripts, bad villains, bad casting, and don't forget the short-lived "return to monogamy."

See I got no problem with the Flying Pacer- my problem is with the slide whistle being played whenever Bond made a big dukes of hazzard style jump. A fuckin slide whistle. It sounded like a clown had hidden in the back of his trunk.

Putting in that slide whistle is absolutely incomprehensible. One of the stunts was a car jump featuring a mid-air somersault, a great scene completely RUINED by that goofy sound effect.

I know that Bond movies are supposed to be cheesy, but they don't need to rub our faces in it.

Both worthy choices, but the hottest Bond Girl ever was Daniela Bianchi.

Maybe its me but I am struggling to think of one Bond girl who wasn't an airhead with a nice rack. Still, its got to be tough to be taken seriously, no matter how qualified you are, when your name is Pussy Galore.

Best Bond girl ever? Sophie Marceau, in the same movie where Denise Richards was the official Bond girl. Sophie was much sexier than Denise. Also, she was foreign and pure evil. That's pretty much everything I look for in a woman.

ffgfg,

My dad bought a Pacer, I rode in a Pacer, My dad was a friend of the AMC Pacer. ffgfg, that was no Pacer (was AMC though, Hornet?).

Hottest--Domino (Thunderball-Claudine Auger. Insert Homer Simpson doughnut sound here)

I've heard that the producers have already been turned down by everyone they wanted to be the next Bond Girl. I guess word's out in the 'Wood that the franchise is dead.

Think about it: it used to be that being a Bond Girl was a way to boost a career. Now the producers need Jessica Simpson to boost Bond. How far have the mighty fallen.

Given Frank Rich's informed observation the Bond franchise has an excellent opportunity to ride the crest of Gay Love.

Not James Bond, of course - he's alpha-het. But why *not* do a remake of "Diamonds are Forever"

I say, "Bring back Mister Wint and Mister Kidd" Two great villians who were gay, but who's love was not allowed to be seen by the audiences

Hav them blow up the helicopter out in the desert but then show their Hot Gay Love by the tumbleweeds.

Give Lindsay Lohan a McDonald's Arch Card, have her eat a couple of sammichs. Insist she get her hair red again and - BAM - you've got the second coming of Ann Margaret - then cast her as Plenty O'Toole.

Jeff Daniels could play Willard Whyte.

Chris Kattan and Jake Gyllenhallwwwenhall could be Kidd and Wint.

Are y'all forgetting Melina from For Your Eyes Only?

Danielle Bianchi was hot, though.

So was that evil redhead caucasian with the strange Chinese accent in You Only Live Twice.

I forget which was which, but the Broccoli - Salzman team worked so well because one wanted gadgets, and the other just wanted big-ass tits.

Kind of like Reeces peanut butter cups. They just worked so well together.

skinbad, it was an AMC Hornet. A car that was almost as ugly as the Pacer, little better looking than a Gremlin.

does anyone besides me find it unbearably creepy that Jessica Simpson's father feels called upon to wax enthusiastic about his eldest daughter's bra size? And he's a minister?

Gayle, I've known her dad's brother for about 14 years. He is a quiet, decent guy, a veteran, good church going fellow.

But he and their whole family, Jessica's dad included go off the deep end when it comes to Jessica. They don't see the sexual innuendo, the writhing and jerking goes right past them. It is so freaking weird.

I blame money.

How can Jessica Simpson do any worse than Tanya Roberts did?

Not to mention Lynn-Holly Johnson...

Dave, my dad didn't just buy a Pacer, he bought a Pacer Wagon. If it wasn't a pile of rust somewhere by now, you could lean the doors together and make a nice-sized A-frame cabin for someone.

Ace, Melina had the Greek moustache thing going. Still a solid 8 though--no placating required

Oh, come now. Top 3 Bond girls (clearly):
1. Ursulla Andress
2. Jill St. John
3. Barbara Bach
Of course, you're free to have your own opinions, but that just proves this place has become AOghey headquarters.

I nominate Melissa Theurieu for the foreign double agent role, Dick Cheney as evil mastermind and James Gandolfini for Bond, James f'n Bond.

Not to mention Lynn-Holly Johnson...

Am I the only one who found her callow, jailbait stupidity kinda... hot?

WhynotbringbackDeniseRichardsandcastNeveCampbellaswell?

Seconded. Wild Things was a hot movie.

How about Famke Janssen in "Goldeneye"? Ok, so maybe she's a bit psychotic, but definitely a looker.

Plus, it has Izabella Scorupco, so it's kind of a double-plus.

Marceu? Feh. Not good enough for a goodie, and only a weak baddie.

How can y'all be forgetting Diana Rigg?

Jill St. John.

cheeky

Last picture I saw of Lohan she was back to full-figured and had red hair.

Yeh, Holly-Johnson was hot, Ace, in that vulnerable, slutty but innocent, schoolgirl kind of way, but not nearly as hot as Kim Richards of course.

Holly Johnson? The guy from freakin' FRANKIE GOES TO HOLLYWOOD???!?!?!

Man, you guys really are teh gey.

Dorismar would make a good Bond girl, if she can act.

Dorismar would make a good Bond girl

There's way too much emphasis put on acting...and eating turtle eggs.

Would be cool if they had her poppin' turtle eggs into her mouth like M&M's throughout the film.

Oversize candyjar full of huevos de tortuga on her coffee table.

A whole dialogue sequence where she and Bond are out shooting skeet.
Turtle egg skeet.

Think of the possibilities for Bond-style double entendres:

Meester Bond, may I see your huevos de torgugas por favor!

The new Bond, Daniel Craig, is as ugly as homemade sin
this airhead can only make things worse

as the Bond fans say: Bond is dead.

my English relatives will boycott this Bond as well--it may be the only thing we agree on.

Guys, guys ... regardless of babe-age, the franchise has been dead since Connery stopped playing 007.