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November 18, 2005

Update On Guy Who Cut Off His Mangerines In Tribute To Winning Rugby Team

This guy.

A recap:

Geoffrey Huish, 31, performed the impromptu self-surgery in February when his beloved Wales beat world champions England.
After performing the deed, Mr Huish put his severed anatomy in a bag and took them to his local social club to show fellow fans.

Why'd he do it? Well, he's still not really sure.

A rugby fan who cut out his testicles with wire cutters to mark a Wales victory is at a loss to explain why he did it.

He's also at a loss to reproduce by natural means.

You know, we all have silly ideas like this. "If I get this promotion, I'll burn down the office just to show how much I appreciate it." Or, "Jesus, this coffee is so good I think I'll stick my hand into this industrial saw and maim myself." Or, "I really love it when the leaves turn color. I love the autumn so much that, damnit, I'm going to sell myself into degrading Thai gay prostitution and then wind up getting slashed to death under a bridge abutment."

The only thing separating him from a lot of us is follow-through. And for that he should be praised.

posted by Ace at 10:36 AM

Comments

Well I for one am quite relieved that this fucktard has removed his ability to reproduce.

Yet he says he wants to have children, so maybe he'll adopt. Yeah, right.

I am sitting here, still in some sort of amazement, thinking about being so screwed in the head that a guy takes a dull set of wire cutters and slowly, over a span of ten minutes, cuts off his own nuts.

I barely snipped my bag with a pair of sharp scissors one time doing some 'maintenance' and damned near threw up.

Posted by: compos mentis on November 18, 2005 10:49 AM

Compos "Poopy-pants" Mentis trims his bush. With scissors.

Wow. More and more material for the next flame war.

Posted by: ace on November 18, 2005 10:55 AM

So in other words nothing new happened, no new information, they just wanted another bite at this story to fill up dead tree space.

It's a nice object lesson, however, that a reporter couldn't bring himself to suggest the answer of "extreme mental illness" that 99.9% of the readership would arrive at, objectivity and what not.

The other 00.1% know that you're not supposed to cut them off when your teams wins, you'rs supposed to cut one off, shuck it out of the casing, sew it back in with the other one, and use the casing to make a handy change purse with your team logo branded on it.

I mean, duh..

Posted by: Tom on November 18, 2005 10:58 AM

When I read the guy's first-person account of his denuttification, you couldn't have uncrossed my legs with the jaws of life. Sure, this idiot gets mad props for removing himself from the gene pool, but I really, really don't want to hear about the specifics.

Fair warning: if it turns out that rugby's Number-One Fan made a video of the procedure (at this point, I'm not ruling anything out) and anyone "helpfully" provides a link to said video, then I will find that person. And they will regret it.

Posted by: utron on November 18, 2005 10:59 AM

Sometimes you just have to say "what the fuck." He clearly did . . .

Posted by: Sharkman on November 18, 2005 11:04 AM

Trimmed. Not trims. It was several years back and it was the first and last damned time a pair of scissors has been anywhere near my package.

And I could say that I had tea bagged your mother and she wouldn't let go so I threatened to trim her moustache but got myself instead.

Truth is I was having a vasectomy and needed to knock down the rough before I could shave the fairway, so to speak.

Posted by: compos mentis on November 18, 2005 11:10 AM

Truth is I was having a vasectomy and needed to knock down the rough before I could shave the fairway, so to speak.

My wife offered to do the pre-op shave for me. I took one look at the razor nick on her knee, and said "thanks honey, I got it".

No effing way the hand that rocked the cradle was getting anywhere near the twins with a razor.

Posted by: Dave in Texas on November 18, 2005 11:20 AM

"So I started hacking away at my tackle."

I'd like to say something funny here, but . . . whew, I . . . um . . . speechless.

Posted by: adolfo velasquez on November 18, 2005 11:20 AM

Friday flamewar time
Ace calls Compos poopy pants
Prepare for battle!!

Posted by: compos mentis on November 18, 2005 11:24 AM

Am I the only one that thinks this guy is a lock for this year's Darwin Awards?

Posted by: HayZeus on November 18, 2005 11:56 AM

What's a Friday at Ace of Spades HQ without a little genital mutilation? :)

Posted by: on November 18, 2005 02:19 PM

"I really love it when the leaves turn color. I love the autumn so much that, damnit, I'm going to sell myself into degrading Thai gay prostitution and then wind up getting slashed to death under a bridge abutment."

It's amazing how every day, I learn new things about the Ace o' SpadesTM lifestyle.

Posted by: OregonMuse on November 18, 2005 04:48 PM

Wait a minute. Testing, testingTM. Does this superscript thing work?

Posted by: OregonMuse on November 18, 2005 04:50 PM

No, I guess it doesn't. Hey ace, your blog is broken.

Posted by: OregonMuse on November 18, 2005 04:50 PM

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