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« Don't Tell Me Beloved Get Smart Actor Don Adams Has Died | Main | Little Chrissy Matthews Gets Bitch Slapped...Again! »
September 26, 2005

Can You Simulate Pool Sex With Socks?

Then there's a job in New York Theatre for you!

Of course, that brings up one of the great metaphysical questions of all time: Can a sock be slutty?

I report, you decide.


posted by Harry Callahan at 08:59 PM
Comments



"Ladies and gentlement, for tonight's performance, the parts of Gina Gershon and Elizabeth Berkley will be played by a couple of hose."

Posted by: apotheosis on September 26, 2005 09:29 PM

My socks are dirty, dirty, girls.

Posted by: on September 26, 2005 09:41 PM

I hear that sock Oliver Willis keeps under his bed is a total skank.

Posted by: Alex on September 26, 2005 09:43 PM

Come see my latest post...your heart will soar!

Posted by: patd95 on September 26, 2005 10:09 PM

Sadly, my socks are frigid little bitches.

Someone using fabric softener on them once, and it totally changed them. It's like they're embarrased of me or something.

Posted by: Dr. Reo Symes on September 26, 2005 10:21 PM

Sadly, my socks are frigid little bitches.

Bleach 'em!

Posted by: on September 26, 2005 10:30 PM

This post is the wrongest post of all wrong posts in wrongidum. Because it turned me on.

Posted by: on September 26, 2005 11:08 PM

Cotton or Nylon?

I think a nylon sock could be really slutty if it tried...

Posted by: Purple Avenger on September 26, 2005 11:11 PM

Don't think I haven't considered bleach, but they'd always have it over me.

Trust me, living with them is a constant battle for moral supremacy. Passive aggressive little--ms.-perfects.

Posted by: Dr. Reo Symes on September 26, 2005 11:16 PM

Hmm. Have you tried laying those two little ladies on top of each other? Followed by slowly tucking one inside the other one and into a tight, tight, really tight, little ball? Trust me, they all love it.

Posted by: on September 26, 2005 11:45 PM

There was a particularly sensual way the drill seargents at Ft. Dix insisted we use to ROLL our socks for foot locker inspections (circa mid 1970's)

The end result looked a lot like that umm, "taco" Bill O'Reilly got in trouble over a while back...

OD green cotton G.I. socks didn't have nearly the allure of say a black nylon dress sock though so we kept ourselves pretty much under control.

Posted by: Purple Avenger on September 27, 2005 12:05 AM

It's funny. Give me some dainty, elastic number, rolled up in a cute little ball - well, I know I should feel somehting, but you can't make magic happen when it's just ain't there.

But an sweet little argyle, one's that's been broken down, one that you can tell's been worn a little? Been through a couple puddles? Forget about it.

There is something strange in man that needs to 'break down' the good sock. Makes it all dirtier somehow.

Posted by: Dr. Reo Symes on September 27, 2005 12:38 AM

I've managed to save up roughly $16066 in my bank account, but I'm not sure if I should buy a house or not. Do you think the market is stable or do you think that home prices will decrease by a lot?

Posted by: Courtney Gidts on November 16, 2005 10:09 PM

See that paypal button on the left, Courtney? THAT'S what I think you should do with your $16,066.

Posted by: BrewFan on November 16, 2005 10:15 PM
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