I forgot to enter...

Hippopotomus
Hippopotomus in space
Hippopotomus

All right! Now that I'm an award-winning haiku author, it's time to just sit back and wait for that crazy NEA grant money to come rolling in.

In fairness, Sobek, that sounds just as workable as any of Ace's financial plans.

Dear Mr. Sobek,

We regret to inform you that your request for a "Poetry in Your Pajamas" grant is being declined. Your utter lack of derogatory religious imagery tells us you must be some kind of rethuglican wingnut religious fundamentalist thereby disqualifying you from competition. Have a nice day.

Hey, wait, I suggested LauraW should be in the running for the Nobel Prize for Bitchiness, and we all know she's a raving rethuglican! Doesn't that count for anything?

Come on, it's "edgy"!

Have you claimed your low-carb wrap yet? Stay away from the steak n' provolone. Tastes like hay with worcestershire sauce on it.

A mention? That's it?
Who judged this lousy contest?
Geraldo the wuss?

I'm thinking Edward should get a low-carb wrap too. After all, he's nothing but skin and bones! Bwahahaha!

Yeah, I got the wrap. You were right: they didn't want to honor the award, in the sense that they "threatened" to call the cops if I didn't get out from behind their counter, but I was persistent.

Oh, sorry, I forgot to give you the Special Winner Code; you ask for the manager, then you lean in and whisper, "this is a hold-up."

GROOAAANNN Brewfan.

BTW, this post has been updated to properly recognize Edward's mad poetry skilz.

I humbly and gratefully acknowledge the decision of the academy. (Or asylum.)
Is this D'Angelo's thing and East Coast type o' deal?
If so, may I request getting an 'award' from Beverly D'Angelo instead?
It may or may not involve 'wrapping' something...
If this is a problem, I am willing to donate my prize to the Girls Gone Wild Katrina Relief project.
Is Katrina one of the girls gone wild?
I would love to help relieve her.
With humility,
Uncle Jefe
PS- Aaargh

I'm sure the other winners will be glad to know the Special Winner Code, but I already got my low-carb wrap, and it wouldn't be ethical to try to get another one. Maybe after the next haiku contest, you know?

Mother Cindy wails
for occupied Big Easy,
Get the troops out now!

OK, that's it lauraw. You've showed up Ace by actually posting a haiku contest followup within, you know, the month... Expect to be banned soon.

What is in a name?
Sourgrapes McLoserpants
Did I hit a nerve?

You're plucking my nerves something awful. Sounds like bluegrass banjo.
I don't even know why I keep coming here.

I personally think Michael was ROBBED!!

;-)