I'm sorry, Ace, I thought ... damn, I'm sorry won't happen again. Can I get you something? Evian, yes, Evain (hiding empty botttle of evian in my hand, behind my back). But, I'm wearing a shirt!

Seriously though, as lame as this sounds, I *really* hope they read some of my questions.

Goddamn I feel like a nerd.

Have fun!

-Murph

Dude, i think they're playing margaret cho or some shit in the line up... IT'S A SETUP!!!! RUNAWAYRUNAWAY!

LOL, seriously, go listen to this... I'm kinda scared...

You better not freeze up and get all Michael Stipe. It's radio, but they have a delay. Make 'em use it.

Try not to think "Wally Cox, the famed voice of Under Dog." That always throws me.

Thanks, all!

Ten minutes until I call in.

God, I hope the phone's aren't working.

Ace,

Whatever you do, don't get nervous.

LOL!

OK, that was mean. I ask for your forgiveness.

Loose shit.

Which BTW, is about digestion, sort of.

Like a hammer!

Is that seedubya talkin with the german/french guy?

Ok, I'm all set ... we're streaming here ...oh boy :) Don't be nervous. Go have a beer? No better not ... change your shirt? No you look fine. BUT BRUSH YOUR HAIR.

MeTooThen: I'm still getting super crappy music. How about you?

I think "poop" is the funniest word in the english language.

Poop.

Poopy mcPoop fart.

hahahaha

Ace,

Too late probably to mention this, but the Stanford mascot is The Cardinal.

A Tree.

Singular.

Not plural.

Just in case.

I'm just sayin'.

Am I in the right place? Real psychedelic, quasi-headbanging music?

Jeff,

Roger that.

My Psychological Actual State: Scared shitless.

Don't be such a PUSS. Or at least don't ADMIT it. It's college radio, dude.

Oh, Ace should go over about as well at Fred Mertz at Studio 54.

Beer. Opened.

For the benefit of those who can't get the audio stream to work, I'll be liveblogging at www.sobekpundit.blogspot.com

Mostly so that I can tell everyone how jealous I am of him. But also for the benefit of people with audio streams.

When will this hell (bad music) end? I swear, the length I'm going for you Ace ... you'd better blogroll me ... LOL.

This music: blowing. my. mind.

Nice, it's an anti-Bush screed! They even mentioned illuminati!!

Hey. This song is like the Oscar Meyer weiner song meets It's The End of the World as We Know It - with a kickin' Bush overlay.

Okay, Ace, it's official: you could do nothing during your time on the air except offer strangled moans and off-mike gurgles, and you'd be more professional and competent than whoever the dudes were who did the lead-in show.

So no worries. Just read my goddamn questions, banal though they might be.

You slackers!!!! How the hell could this post get 20 comments without someone mentioning Vinny Falcone or "Where's Joe"????

Geez..I leave for an hour and loose shit everywhere...

None of the audio streams worked for me, except the MP-3's.

Man this better be good, I'm missing AMERICAN IDOL.

Loved the bit where they couldn't figure out what the name of the song they just played was.

Ok, am I listening to the wrong thing? There's some pussy music on now ... ack!

Ace

Did you take a leak?

OH JESUS CHRIST PLEASE TELL ME YOU TOOK A LEAK!!!???

My "where's joe" comment is down below where he FIRST mentions this.

Slacker. ;)

That's it.

Ace's anonymity is done with.

Now he's blogging about his emotional state.

Ace, come clean. You're just Excitable Andy Sullivan's evil persona, aren't you?

Man, I knew "Ace" was duping us all the time.

None of the audio streams worked for me, except the MP-3's.

Here comes ACE!

Hey, this dude is a pro.

Clint Taylor needs to get his frickin' mouth back from the mike.

Ace . . . if you're done vomiting, pass that on.

The banter is really ... something.

Shit, so they probably wont ask my

5) When Ace moves, how does he slice?

LMFAO

i hate these guys.

"the march towards progressive utopia"

Oh Lord.

Special guest!!!!

BIG BOY!!!!!

YOU "BIG BOY" YOU.

one of the big boys!

One of the Big Boys! !!

What the fuck is this?

Are they playing Anka? MOTHERFUCKER.

Oh no.

Well, I can smell that blog money rolling in now ... you big boy.

Oh no, phone troubles....

a lot of loose shit going on there

loose shit going on in the studio

Ace-slicin like a silent fuckin hammer!

Wait, wtf, is ace on the phone now?

Where the hell is Ace? WTF?

Goddamit, goddammit!

/cartman voice

Someone give us an update, the damn webstream doesn't load for me

These words shall the good man teach his son:

"Ace of Spades, are you there? Ace of Spades, are you there? One more time: Ace of Spades, are you there?"

the loosest shit

BWHAHAHAHA - dont listen to the stream while you're on hte phone man!!! lol

THE MAN.

The master speaks

Phew! I just cancelled the PICK UP THE FUCKING PHONE email.

No. No.

NEVER EXPLAIN!

BAHHAAHhAHAA - we nixed em on the FIRST EFFIN QUESTION!

holy shit that's funny

This is the greatest radio broadcast since the Hindenberg blew up.

Cheers,
Dave at Garfield Ridge

OWNED (sully)

LOL. Nice question Fat Kid!

Stop TALKING SHOP!!!!

Ahhh, finally got it.

just too incompetent to be like den Beste. Funny shit ace.

"Is that a question for me?"

I'm hitting refresh here more often than the Corner on Election day. This is a great day. :-)

WE'VE LANDED ON THE MOON?!?

Shit, no news ever gets to me. . .

Cheers,
Dave at Garfield Ridge

Don't let Elliot talk. You're the "big boy."

MOrk and mindy? Christ - lol

Must admit, this is rather surreal.

did these guys say they were lawyers?

what fan club?

Ace, I sure as hell hope you're feeling no pressure from these guys.

I want to take a blue band and strangle the KZSU studio crew.

What a buncha tools.

Is it me, or are these DJ's stoned off their asses?

get 'em ace.

truth to power(less liberal wankers on the radio)

The guys get turtlenecks.

That's just the fucking way it is.

turtlenecks-sweaters with foreskin

Dude, the WMA stream is some loose shit. Real Audio slices like a hammer.

i can't hear anyone...

Talk. TAKE CONTROL.

(Jesus, I feel like James Woods as Haldeman in Oliver Stone's "Nixon")

Where's Ace?

I WANT QUESTION TIME.

DAMMIT ACE, DEMAND THAT THEY ASK YOU READER QUESTIONS.

wow, ace got lost in the stoner-chat

(btw, you were clearly the only one on that radio frequency.)

Water bottle controversies? Shit, Stanford sounds like PCU.

Where's George Clinton when we need him?

i cant take this.

Water bottles? What the fuck?!!

ACE!!! Take over the studio space dammit! You are the only important man on the damn phone.

Come on, Ace. Assert your authority over these Stanfordians.

D&D bitch!

Bastards! They revealed my last name!!

Margaret Cho - holy ef

Well, at least they asked a question of mine.

You watched Fahrenheit 9/11?

I'm sorry that you had to see that Ace.

more nasty

Margaret Cho reference. Thanks, Ace

AAAACE? Why do you hang out wit da gaay boys?

Never express "fear"

The husky huckster Michael Moore!

So, ace is a lawyer. LOL

"I'm a corporate suck up! I must remain anonymous!"

C'mon ace. you've got to stay "in character"

where are the zingers? I think ace is overmedicated.

buffering....buffering....loose shit going on here

Not exactly a lawyer...OMG...Ace is a judge?

HOST: Are you a lawyer?

ACE: [prominent and uncomfortable throat-clearing]

Priceless. I had guessed as much anyway.
At least that you had gone to law school. You hinted at it in a post once.

Ace & Maggie Cho....lol. Nice.

Ace is a temp in a law firm?

That's it.

9 am.

Tomorrow.

Media training.

You're letting "Kyle" TALK ABOUT "IN GOOD COMPANY" AND "COACH CARTER"?

these guys are so gay my ass hurts just listening to them. Did this guy just say ruffians?

Now they're doing movie picks. Selfish bastards.

I'm going to preemptively refuse my invitation to do this show. Right here and now.

OLD EUROPE IS OLD.

You know, the drinking game we should be playing is chugging everytime the one guy says "LIKE".

Ooh! Daringly suggestive quasi-racial humor!

You know, the one host does sound like Wally Cox

Ace--

They're now talking about the Boeing controversy-- THAT'S MY SCHTICK!

Cheers,
Dave at Garfield Ridge

I think seedubya is a DJ there - he might even be one of the guys on the line. He's a good commenter/

FUCK THEY'RE LOOKING AT THIS NOW. LMFAO

Boeing and Airbus?

Oh.

No.

Next time, we're hooking you up like Bush in the first debate.

European aerospace? More loose shit here.

83 hits?

You mean 118 posts.

Fools.

Ace-- don't pick on Ariane, it works (but it's subsidized, like Airbus)

Complain abou the Eurofighter-- twenty years to build a fighter only as good as the F-16.

and fewer subsidies for our planes..unlike airbus.

Europe is the jealous fast-food working brother of America.

I know that Ace has trenchant things to say about all sorts of political questions, as well as '80s music and John Carpenter's The Thing.

But the European aerospace business? These people are wasting a brilliant talent.

bailout dude-these guys are lame.

Euro discussion, my bag baby.

The Anglo money is the dumbest idea since I thought newspaper was a soft as Charmin.

Just a thought.

Let's be honest: these guys couldn't win a DJ competition against Marlee Matlin and Helen Keller.

Why isn't Kim Richards being mentioned?

Damn it, the Iran thing is where Ace will hurt. . . given that he failed to link either my or Sobekpundit's posts.

Hope he finds time to surf.

Jeff B., that was damn funny.

this show sucks or whatnot...

THESE GUYS COULD SUCK A GOLFBALL THROUGH A GARDEN HOSE!!!

Listening to the studio guys on this show reminds me of why I quit the College Republicans back in the day...

Can we get W to kick these lamers out of the country?

I can't hear anybody on this show...

can't break in... no idea what's being said...

What's the damn phone number?

The can't answer the phones? Good lord. I ran a better radio show in high school.

dont worry ace your not missing anything.

DId you get bumped ace? They're doing a news bit or something.

They won't take calls because they don't know how

SO FUCKING SAD.

They are bashing Kerry at the moment, Ace...

They say the phones are blowing up though. Most calls ever.

Well, I'll say it.

I didn't know what to expect, but "boring" wasn't it.

These guys are actually very nice, articulate, but they do not recognize that they are in the presence of a star because the "big boy" is not acting "big" but rather, magnanimous and egalitarian.

"We've got boys dying over there" and whither Spartacus?

At home, sucking down a drinkable yogurt.

come on Jeff B. theyre being way too witty and funny to pick up a phone.

By the way, Ace - I guarantee that when you eventually do the Hugh Hewitt show (every blogger gets a bite at that apple, it seems), it will be more professionally paced.

Ace, it's not even 9 o'clock. Are you bored, or are you asleep?

Gotta fix the narcolepsy.

In a van down by the RIVER

Take it baby. Take IT!!!!!!

Well ace, at least you didn't do anything really embarassing, like declare your undying love for sullivan or mention how you liked goats.ex

This is no fair, I think that the hosts are using graphs

Hahha, you guys like that one? "Who are your biggest blog influences...besides andrew sullivan"

lolol - i honestly thought ace would run with that one. I also thought the "Where's Joe" would get some more play time too - you could have directed them to the noisetank site then all the parodies you've done with it ... *shrugs*

Let's watch the traffic meter.

The CIA does nothing. Nothing useful, at least.

I know.

To be fair, that line about Yuschenko's wife writing for Iraq The Model WAS pretty funny. It deserved a laugh. One more reason why these guys are tools.

Gotta go.

Good job ace. perfect, in fact, for an intro into media exposure 101.

Rule 1: always have something to say and say it, even if they didn't ask about what you want to talk about.

You did fine for a small campus radio show.

GO-OOOOO, ACE!

http://www.sitemeter.com/default.asp?action=stats&site=sm3snuggly&report=3

LOL - look at the page views!!!!

Call them out for running a slap dick radio show Ace. LOL.

Ace,

I didn't know, or think to llive-comment here (I did over at Sobek's, and then I lost my connection.

Lots of dramatic pauses.

Can you say Crazy.Blog.Money?

Is the right right and the left wrong? YES.

Awesome answer!

Ace lays the hammer down on the DJ's technical incompetence while simultaneous offering a brave defense of partisan hackery.

The best moment of the show.

Heck with the liberals wanting to understand why Al Qaeda hates us-- I need to understand why I hate liberals.

Ace,

"Is that a question for me?"

LOL!

Chris Matthews--pwn3d!

Remember the immortal words in "Delta Force"--

"American! I want to negotiate!"

[Chuck sprays radio with machinegun]

It's a bit fucking tardy for a station ID, boys.

Woohoo! Live commenting!!

Good job so far.

Eliot must die!

I DON'T SUPPORT ECONOMIC JUSTICE.

Ace..plug your script!!! Seriously..find soome loose thread and plug your script/book! You never know who is listening.

Ace,

Dorky.

Ass-beatings.

Tavis Smiley.

Good one.

Great one on MLK!!

Give the man his Chrysler back, ferchrissakes!

Tavis Smiley = nobody

I wanna hear more D&D stories, or at the very least who the ef at Johnny Coldcuts!!

Ace,

Like Selma all over again.

NO NIKE? NO JUSTICE!
NO NIKE? NO JUSTICE!
NO NIKE? NO JUSTICE!

Shit, forgot to ask a "Like a viking" question.... damn, that would have been classic

Ace,

John Rocker. Or is Johnny Rotten?

Reeducation.

Always go with the SS outfit.

Black is slimming.

Ace,

Every liberal idiot student at Stanford.

Good one.

John Rocker - atlanta pitcher who made fun of one of the train lines in NYC - he managed to dispariage almost ever single non-white race in one sentence.

Johnny Rotten - punk rocker.

Separate instances, used correctly in his response to the Prince Harry question... IMO

WOO HOO!

Thank you Ace. That makes my month.

Pay Pal donation is in the mail.

Ace,

Multimedia Domination!

Reading from the comments!

Like Howard Stern.

Only funny.

Dave at GR gets an audio hattip!

Ace, good job, tough conditions.

BTW, on the radio, you sound like a mix between Ethan Hawke and Jeff Spiccoli.

Fat Kid,

Yes. I just couldn't hear what he said.

Only 5 minutes left for ace to scream out "FUCK!!!"

Julie,

LOL.

Barbara is way hotter. She's on fuckin' fire!

Ask them if we'll see Kery's daughter in a see-through again

Ace,

More dramatic silence.

Mastery.

Predictions from the DJs!

I predict that these people do not a future in broadcast.

You have AIDS?

Let's put on a show!!

Ace,

Jesse Jackson unsupassable.

Limply pumped.

Jaded Stanford students.

By the way, Stanfurd sucks. Go Bears!

Do not have, that is.

Goddamn joke-ruining typos.

I agree the silence was masterful

Hey, those guys were kinda cool - they played along. First with the "Where's Joe" thing - where they probably had no idea wtf was going on. Then with the "You're the only one on the stage Ace" thing at the end. Props where props are due.

All in all good fun, now I have to get the ef outta here and go drink beer.

Later folks and congrats Ace!

Ace--

You did very well, congrats. Too bad the studio crew wasn't better organized, but c'mon, it *is* college radio.

Hopefully this is all the start of something big!

Cheers,
Dave

I couldn't talk for most of the show, since I could hear people were talking but couldn't understand what they were saying. Also, my own words were getting fed back to me (LOUD), so a second after I said a word I'd hear it in my ear, which really caused me to fuck up my cadence and train of thought when I couldn't ignore it.

But thanks for listening, guys. With so many well-wishers, it really made the nervousness dissolve away.

Great job, Ace. It sounds like Clint tried to keep the show on track, but the jackass students liked the sound of their own voices too much.

Ace,

Super dorky. Check.

Ass beatings. Check.

Is that question for me? Check.

Tavis Smiley Smack Downs. Check.

Dramatic Pauses and Silenences. Check.

Reading from your wildly successful blog while you talk to radio personalities. Check.

Three words.

Crazy.Blog.Money.

Get Judy Woodruff on the phone! And I mean now!

Time to head for the best testing beer you can find.

Miller High Life.

The Champagne of Beers.

Thanks, everyone. Really! Means a lot.

I think it was a crap performance myself, but I did the best I could given the fact that I couldn't really follow the conversations and they were into a bunch of topics I had no interest in.

Prince Harry? Who cares? I don't.

All kidding aside, those guys were cool to have Ace on their show, even if they thought t-shirts were acceptable.

Hey, how many radio hosts are willing to play Paul Anka for a guy? Hope your on the show again, soon, ace.
p.s. this thread is getting too long.

Ace, you did an outstanding job! I had a lot of fun listening. Next time insist they fly you out for a live studio appearance! Take Vinny with you for some ass-riding on that studio crew!

the host was ok, ace was pretty good-but boy were those other guys fantastic or what! what did they say the name of their blog was..oh yeah-laughingtools.com

they are gonna be the next Instapundit-Look out Reynolds!

Let's be honest, Ace: given all the technical difficulties you had to deal with, you demonstrated better piloting skills than the Israeli Air Force ca. 1967. And you made it a point to look at the runway.

I'm not going to show my face around here for a long time. I have no idea why you couldn't hear the guys. This blue light kept coming on in the middle of My Way...

Ace, you're a sport.

I didn't mind not hearing anyone else, except that it meant I could only talk when you addressed me specifically.

The bigger problem was the tape-delay replay of my words in my ear. It really sort of screwed me up.

It screwed me up too--that's why I took the tape delay off after ten minutes and went al fresco.

I thought it would go off for you too...

(I thought, I thought, I thought eight things tonight)

Anyway, thanks to all of you who endured our glitches. No excuses, but I hope it was fun.

They probably thought they were covered.

Props for See Dub! Thanks for a lot of fun tonight!

Actually, I feel kind of bad for viciously insulting the hosts when, unbeknownst to me, one of our own was among them. Well, other than Ace you were the only competent one on that show, See Dubya! Were you the one who made the joke about Yuschenkno's wife writing for Iraq The Model? Because that was actually pretty funny.

Anyway, Ace, seriously: given all the problems, you did pretty damn well. I don't doubt that given a lack of technical difficulties (like, say, ear-piercing feedback) you'd go over just fine on a radio show.

Then: the 5-minute long "Special Report with Brit Hume" interview segment.

seedub could you please beat the hell out of your in studio guests for me? thanx i owe ya one.

Good on ya See-Dub. Thanks!

By the way, Ace, to commemorate your first "Big Media" appearance I went to the tip jar and poured in a sweet, sweet chunk of that crazy blog money you've been waiting to fill your velvet-lined high-stepping New York City pockets with. I suppose $40 isn't gonna get you that far in the naked city, but hell, I'm working a crap job right now.

By the way, why the hell doesn't PayPal offer a place to write a small note? It would make donations so much more personal and intimate, and and less like anonymous, loveless sexual transactions. ("Your money's on the cabinet.")

Yeah, See Dub, thank you for setting this up. Do it again, sometime soon. :-)

"Your money's on the cabinet" always works for me. Just make sure you add another zero to that amount, pal, otherwise, forget it!

I'm not going to show my face around here for a long time

Well, enough rambling for now. SeeDubya, feel free to show your face around here any time. That was very fucking cool of you to invite Ace on the show, and that gets huge props from me. If anyone wants to shit on you for how it went down, I got your perverbial internet back. Hah. :P Good times were had by all, just look at how many comments there are to this post. And look at the damn re-loads for Ace's site today!

Vinny Falcone would be proud.

Hey, we got to hear ace's voice. And, speaking of ace, where is he? Now that he is one of the Big Boys, are we only the little people?

Yeah, See-Dub...I'll tell you this: despite my cruel and lacerating abuse, I'd tune in again in a heartbeat were Ace to be on.

But this time test the phone system in advance, okay? Let's not have another "we're not taking calls 'cause we're not exactly sure how this works" moment, okay?

id be more than willing to tune in again if its just you and one other guest.

I only caught the end, but the riffing on Spires(?) was inspired.

Thanks See-Dub for setting it up and (eventually) getting Ace on the air.

I strongly agree Jeff, what better place for cryptic remarks?

Yeah, I didn't thank See-Dubya, partly because I wasn't sure if it was cool to acknowledge that he was the See-Dubya here (he's said he didn't want to necessarily be outed), but since Fat Kid opened his Big Fat Kid Mouth, I want to thank him too.

Technical problems aside, it was fun.

Yeah, make fun of KZSU news if you like, but we did scoop the New York Times this summer!

PS Jeff B--I'll take credit for the Yuschenko's wife joke and also the Michael Moore-Airbus segue: "another superjumbo Europe's really proud of". Couldn't test the connection because the tiny studio's not big enough for me to squeeze in alongside the two guys ahead of me playing the anti-Bush music especially for you guys. Still not sure why Ace was getting the feedback.

This was the first episode of Shark Tank ever. But I've done a show with this crew before; they're law students from the Stanford Federalist Society. Normally there are a couple of liberals in there to balance it out and they have a pretty good discussion. It was just too much to try to guide the discussion which Ace couldn't hear, and engineer the showat the same time.

Also--If I'd have picked up a second line on the studio handset, it would have dropped Ace. Plus I'd cut the delay feature, and if it was Wonkette calling in she might have said something dirty the FCC wouldn't like. So in this case I really did just have to let the phone lights flash.

All of my gob-smackingly vile comments aside, you did a pretty good job for your first show, See Dubya, but you've got a little bit of loose shit to work out. But kudos are due for getting Ace on your show.

One thing I won't take back, tho. Stanfurd is teh sux0rz. Cal Rulez! Roll on you Bears!

See Dubya, I liked the show. Sure it was uneven, but that's par for the course with any endeavor undertaken by clever college students (or CBS News, for that matter) -- let alone a live, unscripted program. Check out the Harvard Lampoon's "Bored of the Rings": hilarious in places, a little strained in others, but the net result is still very entertaining. As Voltaire once wrote: Don't pay no mind to the wack-ass playa-haters.

but since Fat Kid opened his Big Fat Kid Mouth,

There's a lot of loose shit going on, Dan Rather does a better cover-up job than you two, don't make me call Vinny Falcone ;)

Transcript, please? Or even a coherent account of what happened? I was having dinner with the male of the species while this was happening, so I missed it.

Fat Kid,

Just joshing.

Dianna,

It was an hour long show, and I don't think I have it in me to transcribe it. There was a lot of talking, and no breaks.

I didn't speak too much myself, as there were technical problems with my phone-in.

You didn't miss much.

A reader sent me a low-quality recording of the show, but it's a really big file and I'm not sure that it can be attached in an email. But I could try if you're interested.

Send away, Ace. I have nothing better to do at work, anyway, while wrestling the books into submission - and that's always a best-three-falls-in-five proposition.

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