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Top Headlines

Money Wired to Mexico Hits a Decade Low as US Immigration Policies Take Hold
Now bump the fee to 10%, and mandate proof of legal residence for all money transfers out of the United States [CBD]

Podcast: Boots on the ground in Ukraine? We're against it! Trump shines a light on voting, Miss Universe wearing a suicide vest? And more!

"As the discussion continued, Fox News host Charlie Hurt asked Trump directly to confirm there will be no U.S. troops involved in this potential security umbrella for Ukraine. "Well, you have my assurance, and I'm president," Trump replied."
Good! I hope I am wrong! [CBD]

Trump on Putin summit: "We made big progress"

Trump arranges a B2 Stealth Bomber flyover for his meeting with Putin

The Beatles' full (but short) concert in Washington DC, from 1964

Longbow FAQ: How do Type XVI arrowheads do against partial plate armor?

Lost Seventies Mystery Click: The Darkest Song Ever Recorded?
I think Professor of Rock (on YouTube) claimed this song was so upsetting that people used to pull over to the side of the road when it came on the radio. It's about a fatal plane crash, but obviously it suggests a fatal car crash too, which could wig out a driver.
It's like one of those nasty 70s anti-war body horror movies. Not for the squeamish. I'm not even going to post the lyrics because they're upsetting too.

Jay Mohr's impression of Bill Burr and his lazy, bitchy Old Queen style of "comedy" is hilarious

Compilation of Naked Gun intros
That theme gets me charged.
Compilation of all Police Squad! openings. They're all the same except for the last few seconds where they reveal the Special Guest Star and the title(s).

Pitch Meeting: Amazon's new, terrible War of the Worlds
I don't know why these tech monopolists spend so much money on ripoff/sequel/remake slop. I like popcorn entertainment but is it legally required to be terrible?

Lost 90s Mystery Click: College Radio Edition
Well you look fantastic in your cast-off casket
At least the thing still runs
This nine to five bullshit don't let you forget
Whose suicide you're on.
Also:
You wax poetic about things pathetic
As long as you look so cute
Believe these hills are starting to roll
Believe these stars are starting to shoot

Podcast: In the last Episode of the season CBD and J.J. Sefton chat about Texas Gerrymandering, The Islamist who is about to be the mayor of NYC, Jim Acosta's ghoulish interview, Israel needs a new strategy for Gaza, and more!

Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: Garrett's Favorite Band Edition
Everybody wants you
Everybody wants your love
I'd just like to make you mine, all mine

Baylor Coach Dave Aranda Apologizes for 'Ableism' After Using the Word 'Midget'
Well, he is also disabled...he is a eunuch [CBD]

Treasonous British politician is forced to admit, only after being badgered out of his evasions and denials, that the "Online Safety Act" is not, as claimed, about protecting children, but about patrolling adults for "anti-migrant sentiment"

I'm frankly surprised the title is 107 Days. I would have thought it would be:

Days Are Important: The Amount of Days Was a Number and That Number Was 100 Plus 7 Which is 107. 107. One Hundred and Seven. It's a Memoir and Memoirs are About Remembering Things Because Remembering Things is Good. Not Bad. Good. Memoir. A Memoir. Like a Reservoir But With Memory. We Have to Let it Flow. We Have to Let It Flow Into the Reservoir of Our Mind and Our Heart. Our Heart Which is the Beating Heart of Not Just Our Blood, But Our Progress. And Our People. And Democracy. The End.

Posted by: ...

Early 80s Mystery Click: A medley of songs by a 60s band

Soft weak poop from the early 80s Mystery Click
I never liked this song, but it is memorable. In a weak, annoying way.
The kid's in shock up and down the block
The folks are home playing beat the clock
Down at the golden cup
They set the young ones up
Under the neon light
Selling day for night
It's alright
Nobody rides for free (nobody, nobody)
Nobody gets it like they want it to be (nobody, nobody)
Nobody hands you any guarantee (nobody, nobody)
Nobody

Flashback: UCLA allows terror-supporting thugs to set up and maintain checkpoints to keep Jews out of campus buildings
More video of the anti-Jewish checkpoints
A major university allowed this and defended this.

Recent Comments

Learn to coal: "Mikeroweworks dot com ..."

m: "122 Something else that seems to be lost is mentor ..."

Hadrian the Seventh: " Executive bonuses. When the company is doing wel ..."

m: ">>>Labubu could make $1 billion this year. I re ..."

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no one of any consequence: "Companies need to advertise for positions already ..."

CrotchetyOldJarhead : "Something else that seems to be lost is mentorship ..."

Kreskin: "Far Side and Calvin and Hobbes - no notes; just ge ..."

Kreskin: "Bloom County - great in its first run, my second f ..."

I used to have a different nic[/s][/b][/i][/u]: "[i]When did quarterly earnings become so important ..."

Hadrian the Seventh: " Talk about something that can be replaced by AI, ..."

NaCly Dog: "More about fires on ships: We rarely learn new ..."

Bloggers in Arms

Some Humorous Asides

Kaboom!

Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You

You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss
Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president.

A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You

Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta

Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me

Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn
Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty.

The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon

A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates

Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree

Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility

The Dowd-O-Matic!

The Donkey ("The Raven" parody)


Advertise Here! Intermarkets' Privacy Policy Support Donate to Ace of Spades HQ! Contact Ace: aceofspadeshq at gee mail.com Buck: buck.throckmorton at protonmail.com CBD: cbd at cutjibnewsletter.com joe mannix: mannix2024 at proton.me MisHum: petmorons at gee mail.com J.J. Sefton: sefton at cutjibnewsletter.com Recent Entries The Morning Report — 8/21/25 Daily Tech News 21 August 2025 Wednesday Overnight Open Thread - August 20, 2025 [Comic Rex] Wiener Knight Cafe Trump Demands the Resignation of Federal Reserve Governor Lisa Cook After Revelation of Her Alleged Mortgage Fraud The Democrats Are Losing Voters All Over the Country as the GOP Steals Them Away Adam Schiff Starts a Legal Defense Fundraise As He Senses the (Say It With Me) Walls Are Closing In Plus: Fauci Suppressed Intel That China Created Covid-19 Citing California's Anti-Business Lunacy, Bed Bath and Beyond Announces It Will Open No Stores In the Garbage-Fire State; Gavin Newsom Is Now Drunk-Tweeting 24/7 Trump Launches Investigation Into DC's Faking of Crime Statistics "Operation Raise the Colours:" British Citizens Protest the Colonization of Their Country by Hostile Aliens by Raising the English Flag Absent Friends Jay Guevara 2025 Jim Sunk New Dawn 2025 Jewells45 2025 Bandersnatch 2024 GnuBreed 2024 Captain Hate 2023 moon_over_vermont 2023 westminsterdogshow 2023 Ann Wilson(Empire1) 2022 Dave In Texas 2022 Jesse in D.C. 2022 OregonMuse 2022 redc1c4 2021 Tami 2021 Chavez the Hugo 2020 Ibguy 2020 Rickl 2019 Joffen 2014 AoSHQ Writers Group A site for members of the Horde to post their stories seeking beta readers, editing help, brainstorming, and story ideas. Also to share links to potential publishing outlets, writing help sites, and videos posting tips to get published. Contact OrangeEnt for info: maildrop62 at proton dot me Cutting The Cord And Email Security Cutting The Cord [Joe Mannix (not a cop)] Cutting The Cord: It's Easier Than You Think [Blaster] Private Email and Secure Signatures [Hogmartin] Moron Meet-Ups Texas MoMe 2025: 10/17/2025-10/18/2025 Corsicana,TX Contact Ben Had for info	« Bitch, Bitch, Bitch \| Main \| Instapundit Launches Denial-of-Traffic (DoT) Attack on Filet-O-Fish » October 19, 2004 Alan Keyes: Nuttier Than a Snickers Bar Let me get this straight: the Illinois Republican Party ditched Jack Ryan, who's biggest sin was allegedly trying to get actress Jeri Ryan to engage in some semi-public sex, in favor of Alan Keyes. Because, you know, Jack Ryan would have been killed at the polls. Would have hurt the Illinois Republican party, set it back 50 years. Good thing we cut our losses when we had the chance: U.S. Senate candidate Alan Keyes told a rally Saturday that incest was "inevitable" for children raised by gay couples because the children might not know both biological parents. "If we do not know who the mother is, who the father is, without knowing all the brothers and sisters, incest becomes inevitable," Keyes told the Marquette Park rally held to oppose same-sex marriages. "Whether they mean it or not, that is what will happen. If you are masked from your knowing your biological parents, you are in danger of encountering brothers and sisters you have no knowledge of." I think there are bona fide reasons to be favor straight parents over gay ones, but isn't this reason a bit, um, insane? Yes, it could happen. But this can happen with any adopted child, or any child conceived from donor sperm (or donor eggs). I think Republicans are so desperate for black allies -- both to have some black political support and to disprove the endless charges of racism -- that we're sometimes easily taken in by a hustler. Alan Keyes is a hustler, and a pretty nutty one at that. If I never again hear the words "Ambassador Keyes" after November 2004, I'll be a happy man. I guess I should mention where I got this link from. Nah. Let's say I got it from someone who seems overly fond of Filet-O-Fish sandwiches. But I seem to remember posting a trailer for the Batman movie some time ago (gotten from Jim Treacher, duly credited), and then it mysteriously appeared on Filet-O-Fish's site an hour later, without credit to anyone. And I know Filet-O-Fish checks in periodically. So, you know, fuck him. Fuck him right up his ass. Not in a gay way, of course. Like a Viking. posted by Ace at 02:38 AM Comments This is so outrageously mean I'm going to spill something. Pleased. Posted by: the UNPOPULIST on October 19, 2004 03:11 AM This last part is so outrageously mean I'm going to spill something. Pleased. Posted by: the UNPOPULIST on October 19, 2004 03:12 AM Ace- You had me at Jeri Ryan. But then you didn't deliver even a single masturbatory photo. Not one. And my goodness, but they are out there. My gracious but I couldn't figure out why Jack Ryan wasn't widely lauded in public, on public airwaves, in 25 cent theaters, and on cable television for preaching the "politics of the possible." But you, Ace, deliver no pictures? That's the politics of defeatism. Phooey on you, sir. Phooey on you. Posted by: Birkel on October 19, 2004 05:12 AM Han Solo: "Who's scruffy-looking?" Alan Keyes: "I am NOT a hustler." Posted by: The Black Republican on October 19, 2004 09:08 AM There's a book out there (and I'm too busy thinking of Jeri Ryan on a mechanical bull with a Filet-O-Fish sandwich to look up the title) that followed Keyes and a bunch of other candidates the first time he ran for president. Keyes came off as a bit of an oddball, but one with a firm grasp of the Constitution and a genuine regret for the decay of the Republic. In short, he was a no-chancer, but one worthy of admiration. Now, of course, he's a joke, a bigot, a fool and an outright asshat. Hell, I'd even vote for Obama, and I haven't voted Democrat since the McKinley administration! Posted by: Christopher on October 19, 2004 12:34 PM Post a comment Name: Email Address: URL: Comments: Remember info?	Now Available! The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines Money Wired to Mexico Hits a Decade Low as US Immigration Policies Take Hold Now bump the fee to 10%, and mandate proof of legal residence for all money transfers out of the United States [CBD] Podcast: Boots on the ground in Ukraine? We're against it! Trump shines a light on voting, Miss Universe wearing a suicide vest? And more! "As the discussion continued, Fox News host Charlie Hurt asked Trump directly to confirm there will be no U.S. troops involved in this potential security umbrella for Ukraine. "Well, you have my assurance, and I'm president," Trump replied." Good! I hope I am wrong! [CBD] Trump on Putin summit: "We made big progress" Trump arranges a B2 Stealth Bomber flyover for his meeting with Putin The Beatles' full (but short) concert in Washington DC, from 1964 Longbow FAQ: How do Type XVI arrowheads do against partial plate armor? Lost Seventies Mystery Click: The Darkest Song Ever Recorded? I think Professor of Rock (on YouTube) claimed this song was so upsetting that people used to pull over to the side of the road when it came on the radio. It's about a fatal plane crash, but obviously it suggests a fatal car crash too, which could wig out a driver. It's like one of those nasty 70s anti-war body horror movies. Not for the squeamish. I'm not even going to post the lyrics because they're upsetting too. Jay Mohr's impression of Bill Burr and his lazy, bitchy Old Queen style of "comedy" is hilarious Compilation of Naked Gun intros That theme gets me charged. Compilation of all Police Squad! openings. They're all the same except for the last few seconds where they reveal the Special Guest Star and the title(s). Pitch Meeting: Amazon's new, terrible War of the Worlds I don't know why these tech monopolists spend so much money on ripoff/sequel/remake slop. I like popcorn entertainment but is it legally required to be terrible? Lost 90s Mystery Click: College Radio Edition Well you look fantastic in your cast-off casket At least the thing still runs This nine to five bullshit don't let you forget Whose suicide you're on. Also: You wax poetic about things pathetic As long as you look so cute Believe these hills are starting to roll Believe these stars are starting to shoot Podcast: In the last Episode of the season CBD and J.J. Sefton chat about Texas Gerrymandering, The Islamist who is about to be the mayor of NYC, Jim Acosta's ghoulish interview, Israel needs a new strategy for Gaza, and more! Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: Garrett's Favorite Band Edition Everybody wants you Everybody wants your love I'd just like to make you mine, all mine Baylor Coach Dave Aranda Apologizes for 'Ableism' After Using the Word 'Midget' Well, he is also disabled...he is a eunuch [CBD] Treasonous British politician is forced to admit, only after being badgered out of his evasions and denials, that the "Online Safety Act" is not, as claimed, about protecting children, but about patrolling adults for "anti-migrant sentiment" I'm frankly surprised the title is 107 Days. I would have thought it would be: Days Are Important: The Amount of Days Was a Number and That Number Was 100 Plus 7 Which is 107. 107. One Hundred and Seven. It's a Memoir and Memoirs are About Remembering Things Because Remembering Things is Good. Not Bad. Good. Memoir. A Memoir. Like a Reservoir But With Memory. We Have to Let it Flow. We Have to Let It Flow Into the Reservoir of Our Mind and Our Heart. Our Heart Which is the Beating Heart of Not Just Our Blood, But Our Progress. And Our People. And Democracy. The End. Posted by: ... Early 80s Mystery Click: A medley of songs by a 60s band Soft weak poop from the early 80s Mystery Click I never liked this song, but it is memorable. In a weak, annoying way. The kid's in shock up and down the block The folks are home playing beat the clock Down at the golden cup They set the young ones up Under the neon light Selling day for night It's alright Nobody rides for free (nobody, nobody) Nobody gets it like they want it to be (nobody, nobody) Nobody hands you any guarantee (nobody, nobody) Nobody Flashback: UCLA allows terror-supporting thugs to set up and maintain checkpoints to keep Jews out of campus buildings More video of the anti-Jewish checkpoints A major university allowed this and defended this. Recent Comments Learn to coal: "Mikeroweworks dot com ..." m: "122 Something else that seems to be lost is mentor ..." Hadrian the Seventh: " Executive bonuses. When the company is doing wel ..." m: ">>>Labubu could make $1 billion this year. I re ..." Hadrian the Seventh: " [i]Companies need to advertise for positions alr ..." no one of any consequence: "Companies need to advertise for positions already ..." CrotchetyOldJarhead : "Something else that seems to be lost is mentorship ..." Kreskin: "Far Side and Calvin and Hobbes - no notes; just ge ..." Kreskin: "Bloom County - great in its first run, my second f ..." I used to have a different nic[/s][/b][/i][/u]: "[i]When did quarterly earnings become so important ..." Hadrian the Seventh: " Talk about something that can be replaced by AI, ..." NaCly Dog: "More about fires on ships: We rarely learn new ..." Bloggers in Arms RI Red's Blog! Behind The Black CutJibNewsletter The Pipeline Second City Cop Talk Of The Town with Steve Noxon Belmont Club Chicago Boyz Cold Fury Da Goddess Daily Pundit Dawn Eden Day by Day (Cartoon) EduWonk Enter Stage Right The Epoch Times Grim's Hall Victor Davis Hanson Hugh Hewitt IMAO Instapundit JihadWatch Kausfiles Lileks/The Bleat Memeorandum (Metablog) Outside the Beltway Patterico's Pontifications The People's Cube Powerline RedState Reliapundit Viking Pundit WizBang Some Humorous Asides Kaboom! Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! 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Alan Keyes: Nuttier Than a Snickers Bar