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| Instapundit Launches Denial-of-Traffic (DoT) Attack on Filet-O-Fish »
October 19, 2004
Alan Keyes: Nuttier Than a Snickers BarLet me get this straight: the Illinois Republican Party ditched Jack Ryan, who's biggest sin was allegedly trying to get actress Jeri Ryan to engage in some semi-public sex, in favor of Alan Keyes. Because, you know, Jack Ryan would have been killed at the polls. Would have hurt the Illinois Republican party, set it back 50 years. Good thing we cut our losses when we had the chance: U.S. Senate candidate Alan Keyes told a rally Saturday that incest was "inevitable" for children raised by gay couples because the children might not know both biological parents. I think there are bona fide reasons to be favor straight parents over gay ones, but isn't this reason a bit, um, insane? Yes, it could happen. But this can happen with any adopted child, or any child conceived from donor sperm (or donor eggs). I think Republicans are so desperate for black allies -- both to have some black political support and to disprove the endless charges of racism -- that we're sometimes easily taken in by a hustler. Alan Keyes is a hustler, and a pretty nutty one at that. If I never again hear the words "Ambassador Keyes" after November 2004, I'll be a happy man. I guess I should mention where I got this link from. Nah. Let's say I got it from someone who seems overly fond of Filet-O-Fish sandwiches. But I seem to remember posting a trailer for the Batman movie some time ago (gotten from Jim Treacher, duly credited), and then it mysteriously appeared on Filet-O-Fish's site an hour later, without credit to anyone. And I know Filet-O-Fish checks in periodically. So, you know, fuck him. Fuck him right up his ass. Not in a gay way, of course. Like a Viking. posted by Ace at 02:38 AM
CommentsThis is so outrageously mean I'm going to spill something. Pleased. Posted by: the UNPOPULIST on October 19, 2004 03:11 AM
This last part is so outrageously mean I'm going to spill something. Pleased. Posted by: the UNPOPULIST on October 19, 2004 03:12 AM
Ace- But then you didn't deliver even a single masturbatory photo. Not one. And my goodness, but they are out there. My gracious but I couldn't figure out why Jack Ryan wasn't widely lauded in public, on public airwaves, in 25 cent theaters, and on cable television for preaching the "politics of the possible." But you, Ace, deliver no pictures? That's the politics of defeatism. Phooey on you, sir. Phooey on you. Posted by: Birkel on October 19, 2004 05:12 AM
Han Solo: "Who's scruffy-looking?" Alan Keyes: "I am NOT a hustler." Posted by: The Black Republican on October 19, 2004 09:08 AM
There's a book out there (and I'm too busy thinking of Jeri Ryan on a mechanical bull with a Filet-O-Fish sandwich to look up the title) that followed Keyes and a bunch of other candidates the first time he ran for president. Keyes came off as a bit of an oddball, but one with a firm grasp of the Constitution and a genuine regret for the decay of the Republic. In short, he was a no-chancer, but one worthy of admiration. Now, of course, he's a joke, a bigot, a fool and an outright asshat. Hell, I'd even vote for Obama, and I haven't voted Democrat since the McKinley administration! Posted by: Christopher on October 19, 2004 12:34 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
[A]n asshole is somebody who looks at a painting of two toddlers doing something totally normal for toddlers and decides that it represents homosexuality and then thinks that publicly saying that is somehow edgy and clever. Instead it is doing what we accuse the Left of, that is sexualizing young children. If that describes you, own it.Muldoon
Update: Reports say The Warthog has been deployed against men
Thanks to fd. Yeah, thanks a bunch, Chief.
Reports: The A-10 Thunderbolt, better known as The Warthog, has been unleashed on Iran
It's a heavily armored (the pilot sits in a titanim bathtub) slow-and-low loitering plane with a massive minigun firing depleted uranium rounds. The capability it brings is the ability to just fly big circles over the country waiting for a target to present itself. This is a weapons platform for eliminating vehicles and personnel. Its first task might be strafing the seas, clearing out any remaining attack boats and minelayers.
Update: My ballpark estimate for a reasonable cost for a wildlife overpass (suitably padded to sate the thirst of Democrat grifters) was $15 million. Turns out, that was a good estimate. That's how much it cost Denver to build one.
Some people liked Candace Owens because she was a black woman who told hard truths about BLM and black criminality. But this was always a grift. She started out as a race hustler for a grift, then hustled race the other way to grift conservatives, and now she's back to being a race-hustler for the left again. Specifically, she is now claiming that people pointing out that she is legitimately low-IQ and can't pronounce half the words her AI-generated teleprompter script points out to her is racist and just Ben Shapiro's way of saying the n-word without quite saying it. You see, you can only say that black people are smart, and if you see a dumb one that doesn't know how to pronounce simple words while she poses as an investigatory journalist, you have to pretend she's actually smart or you're a racist. Weird, that doesn't sound very conservative, let alone "#Based," to me. To prove how much she hates racism, she then says that Ben Shapiro's Jew ancestors were masters of the slave trade.
The Oscars: A celebration of thanking. Dave Barry nails it! [CBD]
Ami Kozak: Every single Tucker Carlson episode consists of him claiming he didn't say the things he said in the last episode
Also: this is the manipulation Tucker does that i hate the most. It's so cowardly. All he does is smear people (and Jews, generally), and then claim "I have nothing against [the person or group I just smeared.]" He'll even claim "I love [x], actually." Just again and again and again. It's all a lie, of course. A year ago he smeared Jews but added how beautiful he thought Israel was, and then two weeks ago, he said Israel is ugly as dog-shit and nothing beautiful has been built there "since 1948." Just got this email from Dracula: "I love Van Helsing, actually, he's one of my personal heroes, if I'm being honest. I will claw the heart out of his belly and bathe in his blood before the children of Babylon, but I have nothing but respect for Van Helsing, actually. Love is the answer. Except for the followers of the Christ whom I am commanded to turn into my dark army of Satan. And I totally don't worship Satan, I just think we should listen to both sides. Hugs and kisses, may Van Helsing burn in the blood-red fires of hell throughout eternity, even though I consider him a close and dear friend, Vlad called Dracul."
New CPAC Treasured Guest Speaker drops
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