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October 15, 2004

Yeah-eahp

Thanks to NickS.

Why Not? Caption contest!

posted by Ace at 12:08 PM

Comments

Men are horn-dogs from the cradle to the grave. LOL!!

Posted by: Joan of Argghh! on October 15, 2004 12:14 PM

Nice Racquet

Posted by: Iblis on October 15, 2004 12:26 PM

"Damn, baby, whatdaya say we blow this place and head back to my treehouse for some Kool-Aid and animal crackers, sweetness?"

Posted by: Alex on October 15, 2004 12:35 PM

"Mm-mm. Ain't nothin' like a smoooth White Russian."

Posted by: mikeski on October 15, 2004 12:36 PM

Man, how am I good hide my racket?

Posted by: OneDrummer on October 15, 2004 12:38 PM

"Even at 8 years old Bobby new that there wasnt anything he wouldnt do to be that folded up piece of paper."

Posted by: Big E on October 15, 2004 12:40 PM

Young Andrew Sullivan whished she would mover her damn leg so he could see what kind of racket she was using.

Posted by: Skinbad on October 15, 2004 12:40 PM

My dad calls you "Anna Kornahola."

Posted by: Skinbad on October 15, 2004 12:44 PM

As I always say, If there's grass on the court, play ball

Posted by: sentinel on October 15, 2004 12:44 PM

I think Skinbad has already nailed this one.

But what the heck, I may as well toss in my two cents:

"Wow, she's even younger than Mommy #2!"

"Fantastic. Why on earth did I have to wear sweatpants today?"

Posted by: Sobek on October 15, 2004 12:45 PM

How do you say "I wanna lob one into your backcourt" in Russian?

Posted by: sentinel on October 15, 2004 12:48 PM

A young Ace realizing that once he hits puberty, his thumb won't be the only thing he spends time pulling....

Posted by: senator philabuster on October 15, 2004 12:49 PM

"I got your offensive lob right here, toots."

Posted by: lauraw on October 15, 2004 01:11 PM

Tennis jargon for captioneers- some of these are priceless;

http://www.eurosport.com/home/pages/V4/L0/S57/E10/sport_Lng0_Spo57_Evt10_Sto619159.shtml

Posted by: lauraw on October 15, 2004 01:12 PM

If she'll date up for Federov, will she go down for me?

Posted by: Dave at Garfield Ridge on October 15, 2004 01:14 PM

Whatever I may have contributed to the contest was lost the moment I read "Kornahola."

Posted by: George on October 15, 2004 01:19 PM

Forget Venus, I'll take a piece of Uranus!

*wink*

Posted by: sentinel on October 15, 2004 01:30 PM

"I'd sure like to put my balls in her can"

Posted by: Master of None on October 15, 2004 01:44 PM

Hey, gimme a break, I am the ball boy.

Posted by: Dittybopper on October 15, 2004 01:58 PM

"put some topspin on this, will ya "

Posted by: lauraw on October 15, 2004 02:02 PM

Fifteen-Love

Posted by: Joe Mama on October 15, 2004 02:04 PM

Dang, I can smell her from here.....

Posted by: OneDrummer on October 15, 2004 02:06 PM

Ooooo! Oh no! What is this stuff? Why did I have to wear white pants?

Posted by: Mike on October 15, 2004 02:08 PM

Got...to...think...about....something....else.....Janet Reno in a nighty....Janet Reno in a nighty.....dang this isn't working....

Posted by: rorochub on October 15, 2004 02:10 PM

I can't believe she pulled my finger...

Posted by: OneDrummer on October 15, 2004 02:47 PM

"Nice ace."

Posted by: ace on October 15, 2004 03:04 PM

I heard you can suck a hockey puck through a garden hose...that true?

Posted by: sentinel on October 15, 2004 03:18 PM

Anna, where do babies come from?

Posted by: Not gonna do it on October 15, 2004 03:18 PM

"Check that shit out!"

Posted by: rdbrewer on October 15, 2004 03:21 PM

I'm feeling a little thirsty right now. Hmm. Got milk?

Posted by: physics geek on October 15, 2004 03:29 PM

"Yeah, baby, I like it like that!"

Posted by: Helen on October 15, 2004 03:38 PM

"Nice... but I've had better."

Posted by: Mikey Likes It on October 15, 2004 03:47 PM

Hey lady! Massive flow tampons are something you shouldn't have out in public

Posted by: fat kid on October 15, 2004 03:49 PM

"I'm feeling kinda funny down there."

Posted by: cowboy blob on October 15, 2004 04:16 PM

"You owe me a new pair of pants!"

Posted by: lauraw on October 15, 2004 04:43 PM

And I thought J-Lo had a nice butt....

Posted by: rorochub on October 15, 2004 05:51 PM

Boys thought bubble --> "Wow, she needs to pee-pee as bad as I do!"

Posted by: Joe Torre on October 15, 2004 07:44 PM

do you want to touch my monkey?

Posted by: bob rich on October 15, 2004 08:40 PM

ACE !
Aren't we better (should'nt we ) better than this ? GOD DAMD IT! There are WAY too many things to put "OUR" energy in to; this is mindless bullshit.

Posted by: MIKEY on October 15, 2004 11:44 PM

Mikey,

Well, I'm *not* better than this.

Look, I don't want to be flip, but you seem very serious about everything. I understand the need for seriousness, but I also think there's time for fun. Life is for the living.

If pushing for Bush means becoming some sort of dour worker-bee, then I don't know if I have that in me.

It's a funny picture, it's got a Anna Kournikova in it, it gets a lot of attention for little work expended, and people get to have some laughs making up funny captions. What's the harm?

The only "harm" is that we're not devoting these energies to work or getting Bush elected, but seriously, I spend an hour or two a day, tops, working to get Bush elected, and won't spend much more than that until I'm getting a check to do so.

The rest of the time I fuck around.

Posted by: ace on October 16, 2004 02:32 AM

Well, you have me beat. I'm only going to spend about 15 minutes on Nov 2 doing my part to get Bush re-elected. The rest of waking/non-working hours are also spent enjoying life.

I've come up with a new slogan describing me:

Kevin - Doing my part - 15 minutes a year.

Posted by: Kevin on October 16, 2004 09:11 PM

Caption Contest Winner!

Going by audience reaction, Skinbad would seem to be the winner for this gem:

My dad calls you "Anna Kornahola."'

Good on ya, Skinbad.

Posted by: ace on October 18, 2004 01:33 PM

Kevin, don't you mean every 4 years? Hah. In any case, enquiring minds want to know, WHO WON THIS FUCKER? My vote goes to: "I'd sure like to put my balls in her can" - just b/c it's really f*cked up.

Posted by: fat kid on October 18, 2004 07:05 PM

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Podcast: Sefton and CBD are joined by Jeff Carter, candidate for NV treasurer, and seasoned finance professional, for a discussion of the issues facing Nevadans, and the larger financial challenges in America.

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Few people remember that Norm MacDonald began his career as a ventriloquist
MacDonald's old partner Adam Egot revealed that MacDonald repurposed a bit with one of his ventriloquist dolls -- that he was a "bad guy" who "didn't believe the Holocaust happened" -- for the Norm MacDonald show, in which he claimed Egot didn't believe in the Holocaust.

Funniest thing I've read about the Virginia mess. Back when they were hustling the referendum through the assembly both Senators, Warner and Kaine, advised them to go slow and play by the rules. Louise Lucas said she respected them but didn't need advice from the "cuck chair" in the corner. The gerrymandering was overturned and Louise is heading for the big house. Edward G. Robinson voice "where's your cuck now?"
Posted by: Smell the Glove

I posted his post on twitter and it's gotten 25K views so far. Thanks, Smell the Glove

Chris
@chriswithans

"Ahhhhh ahh I put my career on the line for Louise Lucas and Jay Jones thinking they'd vault me into presidential contention and we ended up costing Democrats 20 House seats and unleashing a Reverse Dobbs ahhhhh ahhh"

Forgotten 80s Mystery Click That Sums Up the Democrat Communist Party Today
Something is wrong as I hold you near
Somebody else holds your heart, yeah
You turn to me with your icy tears
And then it's raining, feels like it's raining

TJM wonders about world building in stories, mostly The Hunger Games

"It's f**king f**ked."
-- reportedly a genuine comment offered by a "senior Labour source"
Correction: I wrote that Labour is losing 88% (now 87%) of the seats it is "defending." I think that's wrong. The right way to say it is the seats they are contesting -- that is, they don't necessarily already hold these seats, but they have put up a candidate to run for the seat. It's still very bad but not as bad as losing 87% of the seats they already held.

Basil the Great
@BasilTheGreat

🚨ED MILIBAND [a Minister in Starmer's government] SAYS KEIR STARMER WILL RESIGN AS PRIME MINISTER

He has reportedly reassured Labour MP's that Starmer will be resigning following the disastrous results tonight

It's over

"The end of the two party system in the UK" as first the Fake Conservatives and now Labour chooses political suicide rather than simply STOPPING THE INVASION
Incidentally, the only reason this didn't already happen in the US is because of the Very Bad Orange Man (who is right on 85% of all policy calls and extremely, existentially right on 15% of them)

No political party that is NOT also a doomsday religious cult would EVER choose a cataclysmic loss -- and possible extinction as a party -- to support a toxically unpopular favoritism of NON-CITIZEN ILLEGAL MIGRANTS over actual citizen voters.

Only a cult does this.

Now they've lost 84%.

Annunziata Rees-Mogg
@zatzi
If this continues Labour loses 2,148 seats tonight.

That is much worse than the worst case predictions I’ve seen.

Cataclysmic

Update: They've now lost 88% of the seats they're defending. As I mentioned earlier, I think I heard that London will not bail them out, as many of those Labour seats will probably flip to "Muslim Independent" or Green. Detroit's 5am vote will not save them.

Yup, Labour is losing 80% of its seats...

The British Patriot
@TheBritLad

🚨 BREAKING: Labour have lost 80% of all seats contested as of 2:25 AM.<
br> If this continues, Keir Starmer will be out of office next week.

Reform has surged and projected to pick up between 1700-2100 seats.

Wow, up to 1700-2100 seats. It's not incredible that this is happening. It's incredible that the Davos crowd is so absolutely determined to privilege Muslim "migrants" over the actual native population who elects them, no matter how loudly the natives scream that they want to be prioritized, that they will gladly self-extinguish as a party rather than simply representing the interests of their own voters. Astonishing.
Remember, when they call other people "cultists" -- they are the ones so imprisoned in their social reinforcement and discipline bubbles that they will choose political death rather than dare upset the Karen Enforcement Officers of their cult.
Update: Now they've lost 83% of the seats they were defending.

(((Dan Hodges)))
@DPJHodges

Reform are basically wiping Labour out in the North. It's not a defeat. It's not even a rout. Labour are simply ceasing to exist.

Nick Lowles
@lowles_nick

Tonight’s results are calamitous for Labour. Not just for Keir Starmer's leadership, but for the very future of the party

STARMERGEDDON: In early returns, Reform gains 135 seats, Labour loses 90, the Fake Conservatives lose 36 (and I didn't even know they could fall any further), the Lib Dems lose 4, and the Greens gain 6. Note that the only other party gaining seats is the Greens and they're only gaining a handful of seats.
Update: Reform now up 145, Labour down 98.
Labour projected to lose Wales -- where they've ruled for 27 years.
Fulton County Georgia just discovered 400 boxes of ballots for Labour
Update: REF +156, LAB -107, CON -45
Brutal: In four out of five council seats where Labour is defending, they've lost. 80%.
I'm sure it's not this simple, but Reform is straight taking Labour's and the "Conservatives'" seats. They've lost almost exactly what Reform gained. If understand this right (and warning, I probably don't), all of London's council seats are up for election, and Labour might lose hugely there, as their old voters abandon them for Reform, Muslim Indenpendents, and the Greens.
REF +190, LAB -134, CON -56.

Updates on the Labour collapse in council elections -- which wags are calling #Starmergeddon -- from Beege Welborne. There are about 5000 seats up for grabs, Labour is expected to lose 1,800, Reform will probably gain 1,580, up from... zero. So this would be more than that.
People claim that while Labour has adopted the Sharia Agenda to appeal to the million Muslims it allowed to migrate to the country, those voters are ditching Labour to vote for the Muslim Independent Party or the Greens. Delicious. This shadenfreude is going straight to my thighs.
Oh, and if Starmer loses about as badly as expected, Labour will toss him out of a window Braveheart style and replace him. He will announce he is resigning to spend more time with his Gay Ukrainian Male Prostitutes.

Media bias and senationalism are as old as, well, the media:

That was written by Denny O'Neill and illustrated by, get this, Frank Miller. Editor to the Stars Jim Shooter was in charge at the time.
I always thought the gag was original to the comic book, but in fact the "Threat or Menace" headline was a satirical joke about media bias and sensationalism for a long while. The Harvard Lampoon used it in a parody of Life magazine: "Flying Saucers: Threat or Menace?"

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[Hat Tip: TC] [CBD]

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