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October 07, 2004
JibJab.com Debuts Sequel to "This Land"Kinda crazy, but a website is now getting pre-release buzz from the LLM. Unfortunately, there's no link yet to the new cartoon at JibJab.com. It's going to premier on the Tonight Show tonight. And, get this, they're being paid an "undisclosed amount" for "premier rights." In related news, I'm proud to announce that I just got a google-hit off of the keywords "John Edwards cocoa-butter handjob." So don't worry about me. I'm doin' a-ok myself. posted by Ace at 09:33 AM
CommentsBoy, I'd hate to be the j-mopper at this joint! Posted by: Chrees on October 7, 2004 06:17 PM
I'm proud to announce that I just got a google-hit off of the keywords "John Edwards cocoa-butter XXX If it wasn't for intrepid pioneers like you, ACE, searching the Internet, we would never know these pertinent facts! It brings up all sorts of things for enquiring minds....Therazzza. "Ahk, bon ami Jean le fake Pulrple Heard du le zee Koln...come to your Portugee Kumquat...or sent in the "Senatorial substitute" hirling." "Alors, darling Therazza! Mazel Tov! Vee haff Zeee dejuene Jean ready to prime my surrogate with zee John Edwards cocao butter XXX and send him in sooo ready, sooo passionate!" Of course, the "Princess Leia cocoa butter XXXs" bring up no internet hits. But surely on the long trip back on the Millenium Falcon after blowing up the Death Star she tried to keep her male crew's spirits up. Han Solo was of course done good by the Hussy of the Rebel Cause no cocoa butter rubby-dubby for her main dude...but then all sorts of ethical questions with the others. Inter-racial with Billy Dee's character, interspecies with Chewbacca (quite a roar at the end), human-machine interface with C3PO "Oh my, Princess, it appears you worked out all the squeaks with that lubricant!, and bro Luke snarling "I don't care if you think I am your brother, bitch! I saved your hoity-tot life! R2D2 and I are platonic. So helmet wash my Darth Vader headgear tipped manhood or break out the cocoa butter!" Next Internet searches: "Kerry bends over for Likud", "Bush gives a 600 billion Big Pharma knobber". PS - Your automated posting censor didn't like handXXXs, but let you post under that as Blogger - perhaps being OK in context of "trial lawyer". But it did accept "knobber" for Carrie Fisher's most famous character. No wonder the actress took to drinking in later years!
Posted by: Cedarford on October 7, 2004 07:46 PM
The video was a riot. Posted by: Joe R. the Unabrewer on October 7, 2004 11:00 PM
Gasp . . . need . . . air . . . laughter to tears. By Godfrey you and the Cedar done it again. Posted by: dano on October 8, 2004 03:34 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
Compilation of Naked Gun intros
That theme gets me charged. Compilation of all Police Squad! openings. They're all the same except for the last few seconds where they reveal the Special Guest Star and the title(s).
Pitch Meeting: Amazon's new, terrible War of the Worlds
I don't know why these tech monopolists spend so much money on ripoff/sequel/remake slop. I like popcorn entertainment but is it legally required to be terrible?
Lost 90s Mystery Click: College Radio Edition
Well you look fantastic in your cast-off casket At least the thing still runs This nine to five bullshit don't let you forget Whose suicide you're on. Also: You wax poetic about things pathetic As long as you look so cute Believe these hills are starting to roll Believe these stars are starting to shoot ![]()
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click: Garrett's Favorite Band Edition
Everybody wants you Everybody wants your love I'd just like to make you mine, all mine
Baylor Coach Dave Aranda Apologizes for 'Ableism' After Using the Word 'Midget'
Well, he is also disabled...he is a eunuch [CBD] I'm frankly surprised the title is 107 Days. I would have thought it would be:
Soft weak poop from the early 80s Mystery Click
I never liked this song, but it is memorable. In a weak, annoying way. The kid's in shock up and down the block The folks are home playing beat the clock Down at the golden cup They set the young ones up Under the neon light Selling day for night It's alright Nobody rides for free (nobody, nobody) Nobody gets it like they want it to be (nobody, nobody) Nobody hands you any guarantee (nobody, nobody) Nobody
Flashback: UCLA allows terror-supporting thugs to set up and maintain checkpoints to keep Jews out of campus buildings
More video of the anti-Jewish checkpoints A major university allowed this and defended this.
Earthquake off Russian coast sends tsunami waves towards Hawaii:
Nick Sortor Coastal evacuation ordered in Honolulu Warnings for the California coast as well. Impact expected at 12:15
Former CIA operative John Kiriakou talks with Matt Taibbi about the Brennan/Comey Coup
Both guys are old liberals, maybe even of the far-left variety, and both are appalled by the Democrat/Deep State coup against the US. Kiriakou says that CIA officers were legally obligated to report to the Inspector General John Brennan's repeated overruling of actual intelligence to encode his partisan conspiracy theories into US intel product, but of course they didn't.
Jonathan Turley nails it: The rise and fall of John Brennan [Hat Tip: dhmosquito] [CBD]
American Eagle Outfitters has a new ad with Sidney Sweeney, and you are going to like it. [CBD]
Seattle woman takes Navy's Blue Angels to court over social media censorship and 'acoustic torture' of cat
A literal cat lady! [CBD]
OG Blogger Jeff Dunetz passes at age 67
I thought I told everyone to stop dying.
Legendary wrestler and great American Hulk Hogan passes away. Love ya brother. [Weirddave]
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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