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October 07, 2004
JibJab.com Debuts Sequel to "This Land"Kinda crazy, but a website is now getting pre-release buzz from the LLM. Unfortunately, there's no link yet to the new cartoon at JibJab.com. It's going to premier on the Tonight Show tonight. And, get this, they're being paid an "undisclosed amount" for "premier rights." In related news, I'm proud to announce that I just got a google-hit off of the keywords "John Edwards cocoa-butter handjob." So don't worry about me. I'm doin' a-ok myself. posted by Ace at 09:33 AM
CommentsBoy, I'd hate to be the j-mopper at this joint! Posted by: Chrees on October 7, 2004 06:17 PM
I'm proud to announce that I just got a google-hit off of the keywords "John Edwards cocoa-butter XXX If it wasn't for intrepid pioneers like you, ACE, searching the Internet, we would never know these pertinent facts! It brings up all sorts of things for enquiring minds....Therazzza. "Ahk, bon ami Jean le fake Pulrple Heard du le zee Koln...come to your Portugee Kumquat...or sent in the "Senatorial substitute" hirling." "Alors, darling Therazza! Mazel Tov! Vee haff Zeee dejuene Jean ready to prime my surrogate with zee John Edwards cocao butter XXX and send him in sooo ready, sooo passionate!" Of course, the "Princess Leia cocoa butter XXXs" bring up no internet hits. But surely on the long trip back on the Millenium Falcon after blowing up the Death Star she tried to keep her male crew's spirits up. Han Solo was of course done good by the Hussy of the Rebel Cause no cocoa butter rubby-dubby for her main dude...but then all sorts of ethical questions with the others. Inter-racial with Billy Dee's character, interspecies with Chewbacca (quite a roar at the end), human-machine interface with C3PO "Oh my, Princess, it appears you worked out all the squeaks with that lubricant!, and bro Luke snarling "I don't care if you think I am your brother, bitch! I saved your hoity-tot life! R2D2 and I are platonic. So helmet wash my Darth Vader headgear tipped manhood or break out the cocoa butter!" Next Internet searches: "Kerry bends over for Likud", "Bush gives a 600 billion Big Pharma knobber". PS - Your automated posting censor didn't like handXXXs, but let you post under that as Blogger - perhaps being OK in context of "trial lawyer". But it did accept "knobber" for Carrie Fisher's most famous character. No wonder the actress took to drinking in later years!
Posted by: Cedarford on October 7, 2004 07:46 PM
The video was a riot. Posted by: Joe R. the Unabrewer on October 7, 2004 11:00 PM
Gasp . . . need . . . air . . . laughter to tears. By Godfrey you and the Cedar done it again. Posted by: dano on October 8, 2004 03:34 PM
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| The Deplorable Gourmet A Horde-sourced Cookbook [All profits go to charity] Top Headlines
Forgotten 80s Mystery Click, Guitar Hero Edition
Oh here it comes That funny feeling again winding me up inside Every time we touch Hey I don't know Oh, tell me where to begin cause I never ever Felt so much Okay, that was pretty easy. Here's one that's 3% harder. But still easy. Ooh, can you feel the static? So many contacts being made We've got up-front fanatics Tearing down the barricade To reach the stage Can you feel the rage?
Dear RNC; Go f*ck yourselves. I have gotten 56 texts in the last two weeks...all offensive and sneaky and all begging for money. At this point I would rather donate to AOC. [CBD]
BIG NEWS UPDATE NOT FIRED from anon2020 So what, she quit? Megyn Kelly (accursed be her name) used to say all the time that Fox has a top female PR person who is a nasty pitbull and leaks nasty claims about anyone Fox is at war with, including those who have left the network. So I guess maybe she technically resigned? I don't know. NEW: @FoxNews has obtained Lindsay Clancy defense attorney Kevin Reddington's appeal filing to the MA Supreme Court, which includes Reddington accusing the lone holdout juror of being "biased" against those with "debilitating mental illness", which he says is a protected category. Thanks to Mark1971
Holiday Break: I've had a rough couple of weeks -- the shoulder is healing now and I'm finally getting decent sleep -- and I've decided to take a long weekend.
I'm taking Friday off, and then Monday off, too. I have Open Threads for both days and I will post if big news breaks, but if it doesn't -- and it probably won't, news is slow before a holiday weekend -- I'm going to take a four day weekend.
Sh0eOnHead discusses the Psychotic Cult of Lindsay
Real quotes: "This case has me feeling like I'm on Law & Order with you guys!" "We literally binge true crime as a hobby, we've been trained for this moment" Worth the watch. If you haven't seen the genuinely upsetting insanity motivating thousands of women, you should watch this just to see how society is crumbling. Ban TikTok, Trump. I don't care if Barron tells you it's popular with the yutes. It is an evil Communist China op and it is driving women insane.
Dolly Parton tells the story of the supposedly real-life Jolene
As Andrew Branca says, can we see this Jolene, finally? Who was this hottie that was a genuine sexual threat to Dolly Parton? I think this is Fake News personally. When a magician claims he learned a trick from a Himalayan wise man, I don't believe him either.
Peter Cullen, voice actor for Optimus Prime (among many others) dies at home surrounded by family at age 85
RIP and Roll Out!
TJM discusses the career of Mel Brooks and why High Anxiety just isn't as good as Young Frankentsein
Breaking news: Dolly Parton had a real pair of 38s
Or at least one. She carried it everywhere for protection. This joke brought to you by Benny Hill. And speaking of the British: The Buckingham Palace guard tributed her yesterday
Dolly Parton is badgered into saying something negative about Trump's bus-board locker-room talk, but refuses to bow to the media pressure, telling the twink agitator she learned long ago to "keep your damned mouth shut"
What I'm appreciating is that while her surface is soft and sweet, she's got some actual steel a centimeter underneath. Recent Comments
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RI Red's Blog! Behind The Black CutJibNewsletter The Pipeline Second City Cop Talk Of The Town with Steve Noxon Belmont Club Chicago Boyz Cold Fury Da Goddess Daily Pundit Dawn Eden Day by Day (Cartoon) EduWonk Enter Stage Right The Epoch Times Grim's Hall Victor Davis Hanson Hugh Hewitt IMAO Instapundit JihadWatch Kausfiles Lileks/The Bleat Memeorandum (Metablog) Outside the Beltway Patterico's Pontifications The People's Cube Powerline RedState Reliapundit Viking Pundit WizBang Some Humorous Asides
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Thanksgivingmanship: How to Deal With Your Spoiled Stupid Leftist Adultbrat Relatives Who Have Spent Three Months Reading Slate and Vox Learning How to Deal With You You're Fired! Donald Trump Grills the 2004 Democrat Candidates and Operatives on Their Election Loss Bizarrely I had a perfect Donald Trump voice going in 2004 and then literally never used it again, even when he was running for president. A Eulogy In Advance for Former Lincoln Project Associate and Noted Twitter Pestilence Tom Nichols Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: If You Touch My Sandwich One More Time, I Will Fvcking Kill You Special Guest Blogger Rich "Psycho" Giamboni: I Must Eat Jim Acosta Special Guest Blogger Tom Friedman: We Need to Talk About What My Egyptian Cab Driver Told Me About Globalization Shortly Before He Began to Murder Me Special Guest Blogger Bernard Henri-Levy: I rise in defense of my very good friend Dominique Strauss-Kahn Note: Later events actually proved Dominique Strauss-Kahn completely innocent. The piece is still funny though -- if you pretend, for five minutes, that he was guilty. The Ace of Spades HQ Sex-for-Money Skankathon A D&D Guide to the Democratic Candidates Michael Moore Goes on Lunchtime Manhattan Death-Spree Artificial Insouciance: Maureen Dowd's Word Processor Revolts Against Her Numbing Imbecility The Dowd-O-Matic! The Donkey ("The Raven" parody) Archives
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